Wedding Veils

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ExGratia

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Today I am going to talk to the woman who is making my veil for our wedding next month. My dress is similar to Kate Middleton’s (it’s a Vogue pattern with some personal design touches). I’m tall and thin but not skinny (American size 4/6).

Question: what length/style of veil? I always cover my head at Mass as a personal devotion anyway so something just at nape of neck won’t do.

I’m also considering having veil cover my face but I’m not sure when it would be lifted:
----I am not being “given away” so it couldn’t be then
----We are having a full Mass so lifting must occur before Communion or things could be awkward!

Any ideas???
 
Hmm…years ago when I was Married, I had a long veil and a short veil that I wore simultaneously. It looked line one long veil. I then removed the long part, (it was attached by a comb, behind the head piece) for the reception. By Long, I mean the length of the gown and train, short was waist legnth

I did use a blusher (the veil covering my face) But my dad accompanied me to the alter and then removed it right before the Mass started. You could do that, remove it as Mass starts.

I just checked a wedding pic of Kate, Her veil was waist length. And she had a blusher.

That might compliment the style of your dress.
 
ExGratia said:
Today I am going to talk to the woman who is making my veil for our wedding next month. My dress is similar to Kate Middleton’s (it’s a Vogue pattern with some personal design touches). I’m tall and thin but not skinny (American size 4/6).

Question: what length/style of veil? I always cover my head at Mass as a personal devotion anyway so something just at nape of neck won’t do.

I’m also considering having veil cover my face but I’m not sure when it would be lifted:
----I am not being “given away” so it couldn’t be then
----We are having a full Mass so lifting must occur before Communion or things could be awkward!

Any ideas???
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I’m taller than my husband and tend to not care much for my height anyway. I purchased a drop veil larger than I needed. When my dress came in, we placed the veil on my head and marked it up at the length I’d want it both in the front and the back. Of course, I didn’t have any edge detail to my veil. Originally I wanted a mantilla, but my dress was so decorative already that they recommend I go with a very plain veil.

Having a veil cover your face is not necessary for the ceremony. Since you are not being given away, I’d recommend not doing it. You could have your husband lift your veil after your vows, but technically the wedding kiss is not actually a part of the marriage ceremony.
 
I had a dress fitted to the waist with sleeves with a full skirt - I guess a similar shape to Kate’s. The veil was very plain waist length with just a ribbon edge. I was given away (although I don’t think that made any difference) and wore it down over my face until my husband lifted it.

If you usually cover for Mass I would go for a longer veil and personally I think your husband lifting it is really romantic.
 
Thank you for the responses! I visited the friend who is making it and she made it really easy on me: elbow length blusher and back part well past my back, with a thin decorative headband and embelishments on the bottom of each section (so when the front is flipped back, it has two layers of decoration. Still very simple as my dress is pretty ornate.

Just a random thought I wanted to share: after typing these posts, I am kind of rethinking the idea of my dad walking me down the aisle. I had made that decision in childhood, and as an adult, I am less adamant about things like that. Guess I’ll have to pray bout that!

Regardless, when I get to the front of the church, my bridegroom will lift the blusher.

Please pray for us!
 
ExGratia said:
Thank you for the responses! I visited the friend who is making it and she made it really easy on me: elbow length blusher and back part well past my back, with a thin decorative headband and embelishments on the bottom of each section (so when the front is flipped back, it has two layers of decoration. Still very simple as my dress is pretty ornate.
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Sounds very lovely. 🙂
ExGratia said:
Just a random thought I wanted to share: after typing these posts, I am kind of rethinking the idea of my dad walking me down the aisle. I had made that decision in childhood, and as an adult, I am less adamant about things like that. Guess I’ll have to pray bout that!

Regardless, when I get to the front of the church, my bridegroom will lift the blusher.

Please pray for us!
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You will be in my prayers. I used to think that only my dad would walk me down mainly because that was how I always saw it done at all the weddings I cantored for. But as we got closer to the wedding, I decided I wanted both my mother and father to walk me down. I had shared everything with both of them and were/am close to both. So, that’s what I did. At the time, that was rather untraditional… at least for Catholic weddings.
 
The groom lifting the veil is symbolizing the consumation. This should happen after the vows.
 
I had an elbow length veil. It has a lot of glamor like the super long veils, but I knew no one would accidentally step on it and yank my head backward! 🙂 I wore a big ball gown for my wedding so that also had to be taken into account. A super long veil with a full skirt doesn’t always look right- of course, it depends on the dress.
 
ExGratia said:
Just a random thought I wanted to share: after typing these posts, I am kind of rethinking the idea of my dad walking me down the aisle. I had made that decision in childhood, and as an adult, I am less adamant about things like that. Guess I’ll have to pray bout that!

Regardless, when I get to the front of the church, my bridegroom will lift the blusher.

Please pray for us!
Click to expand...
Even though daughter going up on Dad’s arm is what we often see, the Catholic way is to have the bride and groom go up the aisle together in the entrance procession, after the priest. They can be accompanied by their parents and attendants. Have you given any thought to that?
 
Phemie said:
Even though daughter going up on Dad’s arm is what we often see, the Catholic way is to have the bride and groom go up the aisle together in the entrance procession, after the priest. They can be accompanied by their parents and attendants. Have you given any thought to that?
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In my case, my dad took me about halfway and my husband met him and completed the rest of the walk down with me. :twocents:

As for the veil I did wear a blusher though admittedly it was because I had never seen it used before. It seemed so…retro! 😉 If I remember right it was at that halfway point my dad lifted it. But if my husband walked me down the whole way I think he would have lifted it once we completed the walk.
 
agapewolf said:
The groom lifting the veil is symbolizing the consumation. This should happen after the vows.
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If that is the case, then it seems that a veil that needs lifted couldn’t be used at a nuptial mass. I think communion is before the vows.
 
Phemie said:
Even though daughter going up on Dad’s arm is what we often see, the Catholic way is to have the bride and groom go up the aisle together in the entrance procession, after the priest.
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This is what we did. It was beautiful! We were also in the gathering space, welcoming guests as they came in for the wedding prior to Mass.
 
ExGratia said:
If that is the case, then it seems that a veil that needs lifted couldn’t be used at a nuptial mass. I think communion is before the vows.
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The vows usually occur right after the homily… at least with all the nuptial masses I’ve been a musician for. My wedding was the same.
 
ExGratia said:
Good. I suppose I should look at the “script” :o
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Don’t feel embarrassed. 🙂 Most people don’t attend nuptial masses often. Even the most devout, practicing Catholics I’ve worked with for their weddings will still get confused about what happens next during an actual nuptial mass.
 
Sarabande said:
The vows usually occur right after the homily… at least with all the nuptial masses I’ve been a musician for. My wedding was the same.
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That was the order of our Nuptial Mass. The readings, homily, exchange of vows and rings,prayer of the faithful, then the Liturgy of the Eucharist.

I’ve never heard of the “Catholic way” of the bride and groom going down the aisle together in the processional. Recessional yes, but not the processional. I don’t think it was even an option when we were planning our nuptial mass.
 
Phemie said:
Even though daughter going up on Dad’s arm is what we often see, the Catholic way is to have the bride and groom go up the aisle together in the entrance procession, after the priest. They can be accompanied by their parents and attendants. Have you given any thought to that?
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Just out of curiosity…where did you get this? Maybe this is a question for the liturgists over in Liturgy and Sacraments, but this is the first time I’ve heard someone say the rubrics specifies this order for the entrance procession at Catholic nuptials.
 
PatriceA said:
That was the order of our Nuptial Mass. The readings, homily, exchange of vows and rings,prayer of the faithful, then the Liturgy of the Eucharist.

I’ve never heard of the “Catholic way” of the bride and groom going down the aisle together in the processional. Recessional yes, but not the processional. I don’t think it was even an option when we were planning our nuptial mass.
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What Phemie (I believe it was her) described is actually the technically right way of doing it. I’ve been doing weddings for a little over 10 years now in so many different parishes and dioceses. I’m trying to recall if I ever saw it done this way. I think I witnessed it once, but I usually see the “traditional” father walking daughter down the aisle, or both parents or just the bride by herself.

I do know at one of my previous parishes, they did try to implement it, but received such an uproar from the brides and their parents. The brides would be in tears during the rehearsal because it was never explained to them prior. It got pretty ugly, apparently. Pastorally, the pastor of the parish as well as the Director of Worship for the diocese at the time (who lived at the parish) felt that because it was before mass began, it was ok to not insist upon the practice.
 
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