Weight Problems In Family

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There is a spiritual approach to food that is used at my parish. It’s called The Light Weigh and is based on Biblical Principles and Catholic approach to spirituality. Basically it reinforces the idea that we, as human creatures, are giving glory to God when we take good care of ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It uses the entire package. The website may be located at:

lightweigh.com/

I think it would be wonderful if your entire family - even those of you who are ‘normal’ weight could be a part of this - could incorporate it into your approach to the Domestic Church and how you practice the Catholic Faith in your home.
 
This Light Weigh program sounds interesting. Does anyone know if it has been effective for anyone they know? I’d like a sensible approach that incorporates faith. It seems that, unless there is a physical problem, there is an element of sin involved. Not worse than other forms of sin but certainly more visible than most. I feel like a spiritual approach like this could be either very beneficial or very negative depending on if it’s well balanced. Anyone have experience with this program?
 
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JosephIndy:
This Light Weigh program sounds interesting. Does anyone know if it has been effective for anyone they know? I’d like a sensible approach that incorporates faith. It seems that, unless there is a physical problem, there is an element of sin involved. Not worse than other forms of sin but certainly more visible than most. I feel like a spiritual approach like this could be either very beneficial or very negative depending on if it’s well balanced. Anyone have experience with this program?
I have two dear friends who have gone through the course offered at St. Joe’s in Modesto. Both have a new approach to food and their bodies. Neither sees the need to go by what Madison Avenue says is beautiful and both want to be strong and healthy. As a result they are losing excess weight at a healthy rate and are looking like women of their age, height and age should look in terms of active, healthy lifestyles.

More importantly, they felt drawn closer to Jesus Christ and less pulled into the 'I’m so fat and ugly" syndrome that hits so many men and women who over eat.
 
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Pug:
This sounds ghastly to me. A fat person can love themselves! Please don’t tell a child they can’t love themselves if they are fat or maimed or scarred or homely or ugly in the mirror.
Yes of course a fat person can love themselves. That doesn’t mean they have to be content with themselves. The trick is to try to provide balance. You don’t want them going overboard and not being happy with themselves unless they look perfect. The fat problem in the U.S. is out of control. Our kids need our help. It is our responsibility as parents to keep them healthy. Everyone went way overboard with being sensitive to feelings starting somewhere in the '80’s.

Get them excersizing and eating well balanced meals. Most likely portions are a problem, as they are with most fat people. Being a fat child will make it very hard for them to not be a fat adult. That’s gonna have negative effects on them more than being told they need to lose weight. Fat children are also at a much higher risk of health problems as an adult, than an adult who wasn’t fat until a late age. We owe it to our children to teach them healthy habits.

The food and excersize programs at public schools are a joke. More parents are feeding fast food more often. Portions are getting bigger. Snacks are killing us. It’s crazy.

So, yes, I do think a fat person can love themselves. I do think a fat person can be loved and have a wonderful marriage. But why not just lose the weight? Why not just be healthy?
 
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pira114:
But why not just lose the weight? Why not just be healthy?
Of course help the child lose the weight and be healthy. I did not think I said otherwise.

To me, however, the snippet I previously quoted *seemed *harsh. I would not increase my shopping with the child so that they could look at themselves in a three-way mirror often. I’m sure it was not meant that way! It just *sounds *that way to my ear or conjures up the image.

It seemed like dragging them to a well-lit, public place, with huge mirrors and then pointing at them and saying…you can’t love that, you aren’t pretty, looks are what really matters. If I react to it that way, then the OP’s girls could perceive it that way. That doesn’t mean it was meant that way! The ***basic ***things in life don’t include “feeling pretty in new clothes”, at least, that isn’t the message I’d communicate to a kid. *

They don’t need to hear loud and clear a message about them (and they will extend this to others) being unable to love the girl they see in the mirror, ie themselves. (that’s what bugged me). They need to hear a clear message about how to live life, eat, exercise, set priorities, etc. Love is not about how we appear in a mirror. But it was not meant that way, I just hear it that way.
They need to hear it loud and clear that being fat means that they will miss out on a lot of things in life, basic things like loving the young woman that they see in the mirror, or feeling pretty in new clothes
 
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Pug:
This sounds ghastly to me. A fat person can love themselves! Please don’t tell a child they can’t love themselves if they are fat or maimed or scarred or homely or ugly in the mirror.
I agree…by telling a child ‘you are fat, you will never reach you’re full potential’ you just give them MORE reason to get depressed, think ‘Why bother, I’m doomed anyway’ and reach for the biscuit-tin/cookie-jar…I speak from experience 😦

Anna x
 
Usually a family that has a problem with overweight needs to re-educate themselves about how to eat and snack. It really takes a change of lifestyle to effect a change in the weight.

This is important, because obesity can cause many other health problems down the road.

And, there are many innovative ways that one can cut down on fat and calories and still have great things to eat.

A son of mine cut out fast food, which he had about two or three times a week, and in a few months he lost 20 pounds just by doing that. He decided to do that when he went to a site that explained the amounts of fat and calories in McDonalds, Burger King, etc.

Those who are in the habit of drinking sugar-loaded soft drinks several times a day can lose several pounds in a couple of months just by cutting them out.

Of course, there are many ways to cut down, and a great many books that can educate about healthy, but good, eating.
 
Telling somebody “loud and clear” that they should do something is often more therapeutic to the teller than it is to the hearer.
Frequently, telling someone softly, gently, and subtly will influence their behavior more than “loud and clear”.
 
I agree - and the OP wanted to know if there was a spiritual approach he could incorporate into his household that would help his daughters and his wife. The Light Weigh is such an approach and it would mean the entire family deepen their prayer life and make Christ the center of their home.
 
Although Cup of Kindness I am sure means well, putting someone in front of the mirror and telling them the obvious won’t be helpful. It will be hurtful. I have always been blessed with being thin no matter what I ate. I am high energy and I excercise. In the last couple of years I have been taking a medication that has caused me to gain a lot of weight. I feel terrible about myself, but I don’t need anyone to tell me the obvious–that I am fat. My husband nags me and makes nasty comments. This makes me want to eat more.

I think excercising as a family and buying only healthy food would be a good tactic. Lots of love and positive comments would be good.
 
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bapcathluth:
Although Cup of Kindness I am sure means well, putting someone in front of the mirror and telling them the obvious won’t be helpful. It will be hurtful. I have always been blessed with being thin no matter what I ate. I am high energy and I excercise. In the last couple of years I have been taking a medication that has caused me to gain a lot of weight. I feel terrible about myself, but I don’t need anyone to tell me the obvious–that I am fat. My husband nags me and makes nasty comments. This makes me want to eat more.

I think excercising as a family and buying only healthy food would be a good tactic. Lots of love and positive comments would be good.
This is a great example of why I think the OP’s idea of approaching the situation in a spiritual way, as the spiritual head of his family, is so loving and refreshing! To be abused verbally because of how you look by someone who is supposed to love you and protect you is horrible.
I gained tons of weight during my drinking and drugging days and went from being a “babe” to 300 pounds…gee, do you think I didn’t KNOW how I looked? When I got sober, some of the weight fell off but I have had to heal from the inside out…and it’s been a committment to my health and well being that has kept me going. It’s a struggle, let me tell you! So, I think the OP has a wonderful idea of wanting to approach this issue as a family and you, my darling, are in my prayers…
 
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kristacecilia:
Personally, if my dad had come to me when I was 14 or 16 and started talking weight issues, I would have taken it as “my dad thinks I am fat” and been very emotionally hurt. If I was already an emotional eater, I would have probably turned more towards food and gotten even larger. You really need to consider your teen-aged daughters overactive emotions and self-esteem.
My dad did! The funny thing was I was 5’ 7" and solid muscle from teaching and taking dancing. I weighed 124 lbs. All my life I have had self esteem issues. Of course it didn’t help that I had two absolutely skinny sisters. At one point I even wished midlife spread on one of my sisters I was so miserable. Turns out this sister became anorexic on purpose…because she thought she was prego and didn’t want the baby or to go get an abortion. How sick is this…my entire family had weight issues of some sort. I can tell you why too…because both my mom and dad were so into their public image it was an obsession with them! I have 3 kids of my own now, ages 18, 16, 14 and I have a 10yo step. I try to encourage them to just eat healthy and exercise…but to enjoy what they do is sooooo important.
been there done that!!!
 
I am not suggesting that anyone parade their teenagers in front of a triple mirror to humiliate them, but that clothes shopping is a good thing because it increases the awareness of one’s body and appearance. I believe that overweight people have a false idea of the size of their body, which allows them to deny the depth of their eating disorder. The low self-esteem is already there. Discussing the matter honestly will help free up these girls. And I stress a program or nutritionist in order to take the food policing off of the parents. This girls parent’s have to make a significant commitment to their daughter in order to be successful, I hope that the OP’s wife is on board for this work. Since she is a part of the problem, the OP will eventually have to deal with her eating disorder too. I wonder how he has decided to approach this issue. I hope we hear from him soon.
 
I can’t speak for anyone but myself…I knew exactly how big I was…I was never in denial at all. It was impossible for me not to know…it affects every aspect of life…from how one walks to how one sleeps to how one cleans ones body…every aspect of life. Again, I understand what Cup of Kindness is saying but the OP wanted information on a SPIRITUAL APPROACH to this problem. Light Weigh is a wonderful, SPIRITUAL approach to how to deal with food issues.
 
As an overweight person, the last place you’ll find me is looking in the mirror! Unless I am checking my hair. I know how I look. And I am not sure that parading kids in front of a mirror will make them feel good about themselves. Humiliation is seldom the way to help someone feel better.
~ Kathy ~
 
I struggled with my weight my whole life. I would suggest Weight Watchers. It’s basically a glorified Food Guide, and very effective. The accountability to portions and quality of food is so great…

That’s my $0.02!
 
Thank you everyone for your thoughts, ideas, and prayers. I’m going to pursue the *Light Weigh * program. I contacted them and they are not as enthusiatic about using the programs within families as they are for other groups.

They wrote “We have had families do the program. This can be a two edge sword. Families can be very supportive in the process, but occasionally families do reinforce bad habits. This can happen when one or more are not really committed to change and unconsciously sabotage the program for everyone, so just be aware of this possibility.”

However, I don’t think this will be a problem for us, just knowing the members of our family. I might be wrong but we will see. I’ll try to let you know how things go in the months ahead. My wife is great and I know will be very supportive. This is just a very tough area for anyone who struggles with it and we obvioulsy have a genetic predisposition. And don’t worry, I’m not taking my kids out to look at themselves in triple mirrors 🙂
 
The following is portions of an article that was in
The Living Well Support and Resource Centre for Cancer Patients and Their Families.
MSG - The Slow Poisoning Of America
MSG Hides Behind 25+ Names, Such As ‘Natural Flavouring’ MSG Is
9-12-05 - I wondered if there could be an actual chemical causing the massive obesity epidemic, so did a friend of mine, John Erb, a research assistant at the University of Waterloo in Ontario, Canada, who spent years working for the government.
He made an amazing discovery while going through scientific journals for a book he was writing called “The Slow Poisoning of America”.
In hundreds of studies around the world, scientists were creating obese mice and rats to use in diet or diabetes test studies. They make these morbidly obese creatures by injecting them with MSG when they are first born. The MSG triples the amount of insulin the pancreas creates; causing rats (and humans?) to become obese. They even have a title for the fat rodents they create: “MSG-Treated Rats”.
I was shocked too. I went to my kitchen. MSG was in everything: The Campbell’s soups, the Hostess Doritos, the Lays flavoured potato chips, Top Ramen, Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper, Heinz canned gravy, Swanson frozen prepared meals, Kraft salad dressings, especially the ‘healthy low fat’ ones.
Code:
         The items that didn't have MSG marked on the product label had something called ''Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein'', which is just another name for Monosodium Glutamate.
They hide MSG under many different names in order to fool those who carefully read the ingredient list, so they don’t catch on. (Other names for MSG: ‘Accent’ - ‘Aginomoto’ - ‘Natural Meat Tenderizer’, etc) But it didn’t stop there. We started asking at the restaurants what menu items had MSG. Many employees swore they didn’t use MSG. But when we ask for the ingredient list, which they grudgingly provided, sure enough
MSG and Hydrolyzed Vegetable Protein were everywhere:
Burger King, McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Taco Bell
And every restaurant like: TGIF, Chili’s, Applebee’s and Denny’s use MSG in abundance. Even be careful at your “health food store”, do not spend your dollars on ANYTHING that has "Hydrolyzed Vegetable that is MSG.
Kentucky Fried Chicken seemed to be the WORST offender: MSG was in EVERY chicken dish, salad dressing and gravy. No wonder I loved to eat that coating on the skin, their secret spice was MSG.
When you go to your local grocery store deli, every SINGLE food there has MSG, or one of the 25 hidden names of MSG. So, why is MSG in so many of the foods we eat? Is it a preservative or a vitamin?? Not according to my friend John.
In the book he wrote, an expose of the food additive industry called “The Slow Poisoning of America” he said that MSG is added to food for the addictive effect it has on the human body.
Code:
          [spofamerica.com](http://www.spofamerica.com)

         Even the propaganda website sponsored by the food manufacturers lobby group supporting MSG at:

         [msgfactscom/facts/msgfact12.html](http://www.msgfactscom/facts/msgfact12.html) explains that the reason they add it to food is to make people EAT MORE OF THEIR PRODUCTS.
The FDA has set no limits on how much of it can be added to food. They claim it’s safe to eat in any amount. How can they claim it safe when there are hundreds of scientific studies with titles like these?
* ‘The monosodium glutamate (MSG) obese rat as a model for the study of exercise in obesity’. GobattoCA, Mello MA, Souza CT, Ribeiro IA.Res Commun
Mol Pathol Pharmacol. 2002.
Code:
         * 'Adrenalectomy abolishes the food-induced hypothalamic serotonin release in both normal and monosodium glutamate-obese rats'. Guimaraes RB, Telles
         MM, Coelho VB, Mori C, Nascimento CM, Ribeiro Brain Res Bull. 2002 Aug.

         * 'Obesity induced by neonatal monosodium glutamate treatment in spontaneously hypertensive rats: an animal model of multiple risk factors'. Iwase M, Yamamoto M, Iino K, IchikawaK, Shinohara N, Yoshinari Fujishima Hypertens Res. 1998 Mar.

         * 'Hypothalamic lesion induced by injection of monosodiu glutamate in suckling period and subsequent development of obesity'. Tanaka K, Shimada
         M, Nakao K, Kusunoki Exp Neurol. 1978 Oct.

         Yes, that last study was not a typo, it WAS written in 1978. Both the
         "medical research community" and "food manufacturers" have known about MSG's side effects for decades!

         Many more studies mentioned in John Erb's book link MSG to Diabetes, Migraines and headaches, Autism, ADHD and even Alzheimer's.  

    Is MSG good?  See for yourself. Go to the
         National Library of Medicine, at [pubmed.com](http://www.pubmed.com). Type in the words
         "MSG Obese" and read a few of the 115 medical studies that appear.
 
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