Well what does God and the church say about this?

  • Thread starter Thread starter iluvmybabies
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
I

iluvmybabies

Guest
What happens to those of different religions who are allowed things like birthcontrol and not natural birthcontrol…???

One of my good friend’s had a baby about 3 months ago, and I asked when the 3rd child was coming, “the girl” since she has 2 boys…she let me know that she wasn’t having any more…I asked how in the world? She let me know she went and got contraception, pills, I asked if her religion allowed it and she stated “yes” without a problem…??

How is that possible??? I thought all religions were the same at interpreting the Bible and God’s wishes for us to “not spill the seed?”
 
When I was Protestant I never heard any teaching against birth control in any way. Birth control was considered appropriate between married people and a legitimate means of family planning. I cannot speak for other religions.
 
The Anglican church lifted the ban on contraception in the 1930s, and all the other Protestant sects followed suit.

It’s still objectively evil, but since the vast majority of Protestants are ignorant of the full meaning of contraception, they are not held as morally culpable as a Catholic.

You might want to mention to your friend the abortifacient nature of the pill. She might change her mind at least on that method.
 
I have spoken with my fiance over contraception…for when we are married and ready for a family, been bringing up NFP, but he looks at me as if I am crazy…I let him know if it’s God’s will for us to have many children, so be it…if not then that’s the way it’s going to be…He looks at me and was like “well what do you want me to do not sleep with you?” And I look at him and am like well accordingly if you have to do that you have to…He just got upset and told me he couldn’t believe what I had said…he was like “I am waiting to be your husband patiently, and you will deny me my right as a husband just because you don’t want to use condoms, what about your health you know what can happen to you having many children?” And I looked at him and was surprised I said it too because my health is not so well to have many children, and it would devastate me to leave many behind…

But I told him that we had to give it a try, and see what happens then…

My mother asked me to get my tubes tied, she’s a CATHOLIC and telling me to do this?! I guess she forgot one of the major rules in the Bible?
 
Yeah my Catholic family thinks I’m nuts too… first for not having sex before I married dh and now for not using birth control… don’t have alot to add… just know you aren’t alone.
 
mizznicole said:
The Anglican church lifted the ban on contraception in the 1930s, and all the other Protestant sects followed suit.

It’s still objectively evil, but since the vast majority of Protestants are ignorant of the full meaning of contraception, they are not held as morally culpable as a Catholic.

You might want to mention to your friend the abortifacient nature of the pill. She might change her mind at least on that method.
Click to expand...
Really well that doesn’t seem fair now does it???
😦

I have been told though that God doesn’t “accept” ignorance?! So in the end will they face a difficult punishment? I am scared for that too???
 
iluvmybabies said:
Really well that doesn’t seem fair now does it???
😦

I have been told though that God doesn’t “accept” ignorance?! So in the end will they face a difficult punishment? I am scared for that too???
Click to expand...
**Not being as morally culpable is not the same as getting a free pass. Contraception is objectively evil. For everyone, whether they believe it or not…whether they believe in God or not.

But there is a difference between someone who knows something is wrong and chooses to do it anyways and someone who does something wrong without realizing it’s wrong.

You can see examples of that in our own justice system. From minor things like traffic violations to major crimes like murder there are different degrees of punishment depending on the situation. Ignorance does not mean there won’t be a punishment, but it does mean the punishment may be less severe.
**
 
iluvmybabies said:
I have spoken with my fiance over contraception…for when we are married and ready for a family, been bringing up NFP, but he looks at me as if I am crazy…I let him know if it’s God’s will for us to have many children, so be it…if not then that’s the way it’s going to be…He looks at me and was like “well what do you want me to do not sleep with you?” And I look at him and am like well accordingly if you have to do that you have to…He just got upset and told me he couldn’t believe what I had said…he was like “I am waiting to be your husband patiently, and you will deny me my right as a husband just because you don’t want to use condoms, what about your health you know what can happen to you having many children?” And I looked at him and was surprised I said it too because my health is not so well to have many children, and it would devastate me to leave many behind…

But I told him that we had to give it a try, and see what happens then…

My mother asked me to get my tubes tied, she’s a CATHOLIC and telling me to do this?! I guess she forgot one of the major rules in the Bible?
Click to expand...
It’s good that you and your future husband are getting this worked out before the marriage. My dh and I hadn’t a clue (ignorance can be bliss sometimes lol) about marital sexuality until very recently…and while it was a great epiphany for the two of us…it hasn’t been without its issues. But, we’ve been married for nearly 18 years…to start off a marriage on the same page, would be even better, than trying to undo ‘bad habits’ later in the marriage.

I think your fiance’s reaction was interesting…‘he is waiting patiently to be your husband.’ What does that mean exactly? I don’t recall…is he not Catholic?

Your mom with her advice again. Ugh…get your tubes tied? I am not surprised…many Catholics, and I used to be one of them, really are not that aware of the CCC’s teachings on marital sexuality and procreation…I wouldn’t listen to her though-but you know that already. lol:p
 
iluvmybabies said:
Really well that doesn’t seem fair now does it???
😦

I have been told though that God doesn’t “accept” ignorance?! So in the end will they face a difficult punishment? I am scared for that too???
Click to expand...
From the catechism…
1860
Unintentional ignorance can diminish or even remove the imputability of a grave offense. But no one is deemed to be ignorant of the principles of the moral law, which are written in the conscience of every man. The promptings of feelings and passions can also diminish the voluntary and free character of the offense, as can external pressures or pathological disorders. Sin committed through malice, by deliberate choice of evil, is the gravest.
Click to expand...
 
iluvmybabies said:
I have spoken with my fiance over contraception…for when we are married and ready for a family, been bringing up NFP, but he looks at me as if I am crazy…I let him know if it’s God’s will for us to have many children, so be it…if not then that’s the way it’s going to be…He looks at me and was like “well what do you want me to do not sleep with you?” **And I look at him and am like well accordingly if you have to do that you have to…He just got upset and told me he couldn’t believe what I had said…

**he was like "I am waiting to be your husband patiently, and you will deny me my right as a husband just because you don’t want to use condoms, what about your health you know what can happen to you having many children?" And I looked at him and was surprised I said it too because my health is not so well to have many children, and it would devastate me to leave many behind…

But I told him that we had to give it a try, and see what happens then…
Click to expand...
**
The bolded parts send out a few warning signals. Marriage is about two people, not just one. You and you fiance need to get on the same page regarding family issues or else it could spell heartache down the road. I don’t remember if you’ve mentioned it before, but is your fiance Catholic? Speaking with a priest about this issue might be a very good idea…

as a former non-Catholic I would have been severely turned off and hurt if my then fiance dictated to me how our sex life was going to be. **
 
whatevergirl said:
It’s good that you and your future husband are getting this worked out before the marriage. My dh and I hadn’t a clue (ignorance can be bliss sometimes lol) about marital sexuality until very recently…and while it was a great epiphany for the two of us…it hasn’t been without its issues. But, we’ve been married for nearly 18 years…to start off a marriage on the same page, would be even better, than trying to undo ‘bad habits’ later in the marriage.

I think your fiance’s reaction was interesting…‘he is waiting patiently to be your husband.’ What does that mean exactly? I don’t recall…is he not Catholic?

Your mom with her advice again. Ugh…get your tubes tied? I am not surprised…many Catholics, and I used to be one of them, really are not that aware of the CCC’s teachings on marital sexuality and procreation…I wouldn’t listen to her though-but you know that already. lol:p
Click to expand...
In other words not having sex…and even though we are not financially prepared for more children, I am open to try the NFP since I started joining this forum have been finding out really important things my ignorant self didn’t know…but because he is a “modern Catholic” and his parents, both CATHOLIC, believe that using contraception in a marriage is ok, and acceptable, as long as it’s within the marriage…they used it and only had 2 boys, one is my fiance…the other changed his religion from Catholic to GOD knows what because he wanted to use contraception without getting into any problems…🤷

So when my fiance brings things up I remind him I am getting my information from some reliable sources…and if he doubts to ask our priest and that’s it…
I too thought it was ok for contraception during marriage my mother used them all the time, maybe not pills but something you know…and this that she’s super devout!!! :confused:
And she’s the one that told me for my health to get my tubes tied it was ok…that way I didn’t deny my husband his rights to bed me whenever he felt like it without hurting me…🤷

I understand but I wasn’t sure about the whole situation there?!!
 
Feanaro_s_Wife said:
**
The bolded parts send out a few warning signals. Marriage is about two people, not just one. You and you fiance need to get on the same page regarding family issues or else it could spell heartache down the road. I don’t remember if you’ve mentioned it before, but is your fiance Catholic? Speaking with a priest about this issue might be a very good idea…

as a former non-Catholic I would have been severely turned off and hurt if my then fiance dictated to me how our sex life was going to be. **
Click to expand...
Yes exactly and that’s why we have the conversations we do…we are very open and both practicing Catholics…but he doesn’t agree with the whole you are going to hell for spilling your seed thing…nor having protective sex during marriage…of course it’s something we are definitely going to discuss with our priest…so he can set things straight for him…even though he knows only what his family has taught him so hard to knock that one out cold!!! 🤷 Yes fiance’s Catholic…Born, baptised, confirmed…
No I am not hurt…I don’t mind him speaking his mind or what he feels, he hears me with what I feel…
We are open with each other…

And hey I don’t mind having sex all the time with my husband!! LOL…jkjkjk
One of my friends tells me her husband says let’s go and she says HERE NOW?!! YES!!! LOL…
But they do use contraception, they use condoms…and they are Catholic…she told me her priest in NY allows for it as long as they are married…🤷 They have been married for over 13 years through the Catholic church…so it confuses me and my fiance…especially when my parents used some sort of contraception and advise for me to get my tubes tied…🤷
 
iluvmybabies said:
OK…Uhm…meaning that it’s ok if you didn’t really know?
Click to expand...
Sin is never okay… you’re just less culpable if you’re truly ignorant (as in, if you were taught your entire life that birthcontrol isn’t bad - as a lot of protestant faiths do)…
 
Imagine this. Imagine a new chemical came out that totally 100% repelled mosquitos. No bites whatsoever within 48 hours of application.

Only one research group opposed it and raised safety concerns. The government approved it for sale and people bought it in droves except for those few who believed the researcher warnings.

20 years later there is a massive cancer outbreak and the chemical is determined to be the major cause.

Are the people who used it and put it on their kids guilty of murder / suicide? No. They didn’t know how bad for them it was. But they still got the cancer.

Same thing for contraception. Sin isn’t an arbitrary list of things God doesn’t want you to do. It is a list of things that is inherently damaging to your soul and your ability to give and receive love. Contraceptives cause severe damage to a marriage in a way not often immediately visible, but totally real anyways. It is no coincidence that divorce and broken marriage tracks directly with contraceptive useage rates.
 
iluvmybabies said:
What happens to those of different religions who are allowed things like birthcontrol and not natural birthcontrol…???

One of my good friend’s had a baby about 3 months ago, and I asked when the 3rd child was coming, “the girl” since she has 2 boys…she let me know that she wasn’t having any more…I asked how in the world? She let me know she went and got contraception, pills, I asked if her religion allowed it and she stated “yes” without a problem…??

How is that possible??? I thought all religions were the same at interpreting the Bible and God’s wishes for us to “not spill the seed?”
Click to expand...
DH’s religion (Jehovah’s Witness) encourages tubal litigations :eek: and other forms of contraception to limit the amount of children a family should have. And if you are one of the full time door knockers, you are encouranged not to have any. There is a poster here who was a JW before and was brainwashed unto getting a tubal. She’s Catholic now and has no children thanks to those JWs. I guess I should count myself as lucky since DH believes that contraception is wrong. All I had to do was explain it with biblical examples (such as Onan) and made him sit with me to hear “Contraception, Why Not”… that did the miracle.

And I am looked at funny too in my own family since I use NFP. My grandma was told by a priest in SF that it was ok to use the pill and that it was ok to get a tubal. :mad: My mom had a tubal too but I don’t know if she consulted a priest. My guess is that she did, but she had it done in Mexico.

My grandma still thinks it’s ok to use the pill or get a tubal because that one priest told her it was ok back in the 60’s and then in the 70’s. She tells me to use the pill and I tell her ABC is wrong but she tells me it’s not. And she’s the most devout Catholic of my family. I told her the Church doesn’t ok ABC but she thinks I’m crazy. The rest of my family does too, so do my friends, and DH’s family, including his ex-catholic now JW sisters (also his Catholic sisters). His Catholic parents think it’s good we use NFP but think we should use the pill to avoid until after my upcoming surgery 🤷
 
yessisan said:
DH’s religion (Jehovah’s Witness) encourages tubal litigations :eek: and other forms of contraception to limit the amount of children a family should have. And if you are one of the full time door knockers, you are encouranged not to have any. There is a poster here who was a JW before and was brainwashed unto getting a tubal. She’s Catholic now and has no children thanks to those JWs. I guess I should count myself as lucky since DH believes that contraception is wrong. All I had to do was explain it with biblical examples (such as Onan) and made him sit with me to hear “Contraception, Why Not”… that did the miracle.

And I am looked at funny too in my own family since I use NFP. My grandma was told by a priest in SF that it was ok to use the pill and that it was ok to get a tubal. :mad: My mom had a tubal too but I don’t know if she consulted a priest. My guess is that she did, but she had it done in Mexico.

My grandma still thinks it’s ok to use the pill or get a tubal because that one priest told her it was ok back in the 60’s and then in the 70’s. She tells me to use the pill and I tell her ABC is wrong but she tells me it’s not. And she’s the most devout Catholic of my family. I told her the Church doesn’t ok ABC but she thinks I’m crazy. The rest of my family does too, so do my friends, and DH’s family, including his ex-catholic now JW sisters (also his Catholic sisters). His Catholic parents think it’s good we use NFP but think we should use the pill to avoid until after my upcoming surgery 🤷
Click to expand...
I am telling you it’s so confusing…because one priest could say one thing, then another could say another thing, then you read and interpret what you have read infront of them and neither agree it’s like hello? A little help here?! :confused:
 
iluvmybabies said:
I am telling you it’s so confusing…because one priest could say one thing, then another could say another thing, then you read and interpret what you have read infront of them and neither agree it’s like hello? A little help here?! :confused:
Click to expand...
I wonder why some priests think it’s ok? Haven’t they read the encyclicals???
 
iluvmybabies said:
I am telling you it’s so confusing…because one priest could say one thing, then another could say another thing, then you read and interpret what you have read infront of them and neither agree it’s like hello? A little help here?! :confused:
Click to expand...
The teachings of the church aren’t contingent on the opinions of the priest.
I would let your friends know that this priest is not in keeping with the teachings of the faith…

If you’re looking for solid answers… refer to the Catechism… and steer your friends to the Catechism as well.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top