What are you struggling with right now?

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Don’t sell yourself short! You can breathe, you can type, you can communicate in a language with others, you can see… (Okay, I don’t want to assume too much) 😃
 
Oh, I didn’t mean that I’m worthless and/or in agony 😮 Nevertheless, life is quite challenging at the moment. Some days it feels like I spend hours banging my head on the wall.
 
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Cruciferi:
I’m a chronic CAF poster and I admit it.
LOL That should be “Inpurrvention. We need you to step away from the Inpurrnet now.”
 
I’m struggling with the fact that my mother will not be with me forever. I don’t think she’s dying, but she is getting older. And, when that happens I’m not sure how I would handle myself. I’m sure a lot of people who have had parents that have died during their childhood feel that way about their surviving parent. Not to derail the topic or anything, it’s just what’s going on in my mind right now.
 
Pretty much loneliness and lack of hope. I hope to go to Heaven, but don’t really have any hopes, goals, passions for this life.
 
Racing thoughts/scenarios (some good, some bad, some ideas for things), a washer that sounds like a jackhammer before and at the final spin, Loneliness (both in love and, despite knowing God is with me, faith), frequent colds (thanks to working in a mall)
 
🤔 that sounds like my washer…my neighbour asked the other day if it was normal.
 
Medical tests to find out which surgery is right for me. I have a hiatal hernia and a stomach that is partially in my throat, according to the dr which is why my GERD issues haven’t been resolved with medication.

The first of my tests was performed yesterday (God is the only reason I made it through). The second will be scheduled and performed after learning the results of the first. Whichever process is decided best for my surgery, it will require an overnight hospital stay and a 3 week liquid diet while I heal.
 
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