What did you say to someone who made rude comment?

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I have two children, ages 2 1/2 and 1, and am expecting #3 in a few months. They will be approximately 1 1/2 years apart (btw, I don’t mind, they’ll grow up together!!). I am a convert to the Catholic faith, the only Catholic in a sea of protestant/unchurched family. I am living out the teachings of the Church on the family, which means I will probably have many children! I just needed some encouraging Scripture verses or quotes from saints about motherhood or children to boost me up when family or other people (even strangers) make rude comments degrading my belief in no contraception or how many children I have and how close together they are.

What have other mothers said to these comments? What Scriptures or quotes do you know?

Thanks a lot,
mass4life
 
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mass4life:
I have two children, ages 2 1/2 and 1, and am expecting #3 in a few months. They will be approximately 1 1/2 years apart (btw, I don’t mind, they’ll grow up together!!). I am a convert to the Catholic faith, the only Catholic in a sea of protestant/unchurched family. I am living out the teachings of the Church on the family, which means I will probably have many children! I just needed some encouraging Scripture verses or quotes from saints about motherhood or children to boost me up when family or other people (even strangers) make rude comments degrading my belief in no contraception or how many children I have and how close together they are.

What have other mothers said to these comments? What Scriptures or quotes do you know?
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Dear Mass4life,
God Bless You!
My daughter-in-law is expecting her 3rd child in Sept. She is 38 and her youngest is 8… of course everyone has assumed that this beautiful new life is a mistake. My 8 year old grandson was diagnosed w/ a rare blood disorder when he was not quite 3… a lot of hospitaliztions, transfusions, etc. My point, the child was given a clean bill of health a year ago (a Miracle!) and they could hardly wait to get started on their family again. The “world” just doesn’t get it. don’t listen to anyone…just thank almighty God for the gift of life! Annunciata:)
 
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mass4life:
I have two children, ages 2 1/2 and 1, and am expecting #3 in a few months. They will be approximately 1 1/2 years apart (btw, I don’t mind, they’ll grow up together!!). I am a convert to the Catholic faith, the only Catholic in a sea of protestant/unchurched family. I am living out the teachings of the Church on the family, which means I will probably have many children! I just needed some encouraging Scripture verses or quotes from saints about motherhood or children to boost me up when family or other people (even strangers) make rude comments degrading my belief in no contraception or how many children I have and how close together they are.

What have other mothers said to these comments? What Scriptures or quotes do you know?

Thanks a lot,
mass4life
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We have a couple in church that have 13 of their own children and adopted 1 and raising 1 of their grandbabies… she told the story of going into church one time and a parishoner asked her just how many children she had and at the time her answer was 12, the parishoner responded to her with a statement “well, what do you call that” and eyebrows turned down… Doris said without hesitation “it’s a good start”… Lord love her and you too… everyone here supports you… i know that God does… 👍
 
A lovely woman who has eight children and has adopted seven said that she took four to the store once - when they were young - and a man said - lady, haven’t you ever heard of family planning? - and she said - yes, and I’m about halfway through my plan!

I think the best thing is just to look at them like you can’t understand why they don’t think it’s the most wonderful thing in the world. Maybe many will never understand, but as someone who came around to fully embracing the Church’s teachings by the experiences of being around families that were open to life, I can say that you never know how many hearts you might change and how many little souls may come into being because of your witness.

God Bless you,
Nicole
 
When I’m out and about with my four children in tow and somebody stops me and says (in that tone) “ARE THEY ALL YOURS??” I sometimes say, “No they also belong to my husband.” and sometimes I say, “Yes, ALL of them are mine aren’t they beautiful??” Stops 'em dead in their tracks! God Bless! <><
 
I too have looked for good replies to rude comments. When my wife was pregnant with our fourth, someone said “Don;t you know what causes this?”

I was prepared for that one… I replied, “Yes, and as a matter of fact, I enjoy it very much!” Got a smile and no more comments!

Congratulations! It’s great that you are looking forward to a large family. Just remember to enjoy what God gives!

Peace.
 
This is a standard reply that my Dad has used for years when people make a rude comment or ask a question that’s not appropriate. He’ll just look them straight in the eye and say “Now, why would you say a thing like that?” or “Why would you ask me a question like that?” It usually stops them in their tracks!
 
Q: How many are you going to have?
A: Enough for my own rugby team! 😃

Q: Do you know what causes that?
A: Yup!
 
mass4life,

Clever comebacks are fine. But remember, you can’t out bray a jackass. A warm smile and maybe something like, “I love them all” gets the point across nicely.

Bill

Or maybe if you extended your middle fin . . . no no no. Never mind.
 
I don’t have any help on rude comments, but I just wanted to say that I’m a little envious (in a very sanctified way, of course) of you people who came from large families and who have large families. I have one brother, and that’s it (my mom had very difficult deliveries with both of us, and she and Dad decided two was enough). My wife and I followed suit; after #2, I had myself snipped (an action that we have both regretted many times since then).

I have often wished that I had had more siblings growing up–especially sisters. I think I would have understood women a lot better if I had had some sisters. And I also wish that we had had more kids than just the two we had. They turned out great, but I have always felt that I missed out on something not having any daughters.

You folks with the large families–more power to ya! As far as the comments are concerned, just tell 'em to hang it on their beaks!

DaveBj
 
I’m the second youngest, and I always wished I was an only child. I hated having all the siblings. I always felt like I had to overcompensate on a lot of things to get attention. My parents did a good job, but having two older brothers, an older sister and a younger brother makes you sometimes feel a little lost in the shuffle. Plus, I didn’t get along with my sister and one of my older brothers til they moved out of the house permantly. I now live about 3 hours away from all of them, and I have to say I get along with them a lot better now that I don’t see or talk to them everyday (though I could live without my sister’s and mother’s comments about me living with two boys and how its a little improper… we’re not dating, and won’t be in the future, because ew barf)

As for rude comments… Say I do know I have a big family but I don’t know how any of it’s your business. Or you could say yes I’m doing my part to make sure theres enough people feeding into the social security system when we’re older.
 
My husband and I don’t have children yet (not by choice) but I can relate to you on this one. I get questions from people all time as to why we don’t have children or when we are going to start a family. I would like to tell them it’s none of their business, but I usually just smile and say I don’t know or tell them God has not blessed us with any yet. What I really find discouraging is when I do tell someone we are trying to start a family they say something like, “Oh take care of my kids for a day, then you will change your mind about having kids.” It’s sad that so many people in today’s culture see having children as a curse rather than a blessing. When I see large families I think they are the most blessed of all!!
 
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sarahcabanski:
I get questions from people all time as to why we don’t have children or when we are going to start a family. I would like to tell them it’s none of their business, but I usually just smile and say I don’t know or tell them God has not blessed us with any yet.
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I know exactly how you feel! I had my only child at 36 and I can’t count the number of times some casual acquaintance or someone I hardly knew would ask me why I don’t have any children, or if I didn’t want children! And every time I was just so dumbfounded that all I could do was look at them…so the look on my face must’ve been odd because they’d just drop the subject after that or apologize.

And now I get questionned on why I only have one child. I’m sure people just jump to the conclusion that we use birth control or whatever. I really hope I don’t say such unthinking questions to anyone else. It kind of has made me more careful about what I say/ask people.

JELane
 
Just say you believe it is such a blessing to be gifted with little ones!!! And that you believe HE alone is the giver and taker of life–and that you also believe nothing should stand in the way of God’s plan!

God Bless~~~~~

*What a joy to be a parent *

"Every good and perfect gift is from above"
(Think this verse is in Timothy)…
 
My cousin has the same problem because she has 5 kids and gets rude comments from people. So she says to them, “If I ask you to start supporting my kids, then you can criticize me.”
 
I’m just appalled by some of the comments people here have heard. What kind of person makes a remark about a stranger’s family like that? Raised by wolves I guess…
 
This forum has a thread somewhere ( not sure where) with pages of hysterical comebacks to use when someone comments on the size (large or small) of your family. I laughed out loud repeatedly when reading it.

We always just replied that yes they were all ours and we loved every single one and felt blessed to have a big family. I personally don;t consider our five to be a BIG family but the world sure does.

When I go places with my friends, who almost all have at least four-- and one has 9–, we get LOTS more comments, usually along the lines of “Is this a day care center?”
 
A. Just ignore them.

B. say “I am hoping to improve the population by out-breading ignorant rude people like you.”

C. Pretend to only speak Latin

D. Look at them and say “I am so sorry, it must be so embarrassing to blurt out rude things like that uncontrollably.”

E. Try “Excuse me, we have not been introduced” this is best said in a very condensending tone… think “queen of England”

-D
 
DARCEE…though I don’t agree in having a “Battle of the Wits” with an unarmed apponent, you just gave me some great ammunition.:rotfl:

:amen:
 
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Makerteacher:
When I go places with my friends, who almost all have at least four-- and one has 9–, we get LOTS more comments, usually along the lines of “Is this a day care center?”
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One of my good friends has 8. We were talking in her yard one day while the kids played and someone wanted to know what the charge for the daycare was. I thought this poor woman was going to choke on her tongue when she was told that all these kids are ours.

-D
 
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