What do I do?

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Sister_Terese

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I don’t know where to start. I guess I have to start with a broken heart. I have been a religious sister since the 80’s. I have served the Church faithfully as a teacher, principal, and in any other capacity where I am needed for over 25 years. Now, in my old age (I am 61), I feel abandoned by the Church and my community. My community is no longer viable. The older sisters are in a nursing home. The diocese from where my community was located as suppressed the community because there has been no growth in many years. Now, I am all alone. Someone who I thought was a friend–more than a friend–has wounded me so deeply that I don’t think the wound will ever heal.

My request for prayers is because I feel such anger and resentment toward this person. She used me. She used me in ways that I never dreamed anyone could, let alone another member of my community. My heart is filled with desire for revenge. I’ve tried so hard to push this from my mind, heart, and soul, but it comes back. I pray for her, and I do not will to have these feelings toward her, but I do and I don’t know how to get rid of them. I’ve prayed, maybe not as much as I should, but I have prayed for a release from these feelings, and have also prayed for her.

Right now, I would appreciate it so much if you could pray for me–that this obsession with revenge is removed from my heart.

Thank you and God bless you all.:sad_yes::bighanky:
 
I can somewhat feel what you’re going through. Feelings for revenge can be a hard thing to get rid of. Ill include you in my petitions while saying the rosary. Hang in there! Please try to channel these feelings of revenge towards something holy and good! Please remember to offer all of your pain up to God for the souls of purgatory and the conversion of sinners. God bless you. You’ll be in my prayers. I’m not a very wise person for counselling but I hope I helped in some way. Reading certain books may help too.
 
Prayer To Be Merciful

“Love one another as I have loved you.” (*John *15:12)

Help me, Jesus, that what I ask of You (Mercy) I will give to others in word and deed.

Help me, O Lord, that my eyes may be merciful, so that I may never suspect or judge others, but always look for what is beautiful and good in other people.

Help me, that my ears may be merciful, so that I may give heed to others needs, and not be indifferent to their pain.

Help me, O Lord, that my tongue may be merciful, so that I should never speak wrongly of others, but have a word of comfort and forgiveness for all.

Help me, O Lord, that my hands may be merciful and filled with good deeds so that I may do only good to others and always try to take upon myself the more difficult tasks.

Help me, O Lord, that my feet may be merciful, so that I may hurry to assist others, overcoming my own fatigue and weariness, contemplating Your love and mercy.

Help me O Lord, to forgive and forget. This is Your greatest gift to me, and should be mine for Your sake, to all who offend me.

(Adapted from St. Faustina’s Diary)
 
Sister Terese, I am praying for you that you may receive peace in your heart and learn to let go of your pain and revenge for the person who has hurt you.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you. Blessed are you among women and blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed by Thy name. Thy kingdom come; Thy will be done; on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.

St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray; and do thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Host, by the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.
 
You are in my prayers:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury,pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen
 
This a very heavey cross for you to bare, but know this that Jesus is carrying it for you as well, He is taking this weight upon his shoulder. It might not seem that way but rest assured that HE is with you to the end of time…
I will pray for you and for her…
 
Sister Terese, I am praying that your heart be unburdened, and your mind put at peace. Try to remember that Christ sees what is being done to you, and He fully understands your human emotion.

PRAYER OF REFUGE
(By St. Alphonsus Liguori.)
Behold, O Mother of my God,
my only hope, Mary,
behold at thy feet a miserable sinner,
who asks thee for mercy.
Thou art proclaimed and called by the whole Church,
and by all the faithful,
the refuge of sinners.
Thou art consequently my refuge;
thou hast to save me.
I will say with William of Paris:
Thou knowest, most sweet Mother of God,
how much thy blessed Son desires our salvation.
Thou knowest all that Jesus Christ endured for this end.
I present thee, O my Mother, the sufferings of Jesus:
the cold that He endured in the stable,
His journey into Egypt,
His toils, His sweat, the Blood that He shed;
the anguish which caused His death on the Cross,
and of which thou wast thyself a witness.
Oh, show that thou lovest thy beloved Son,
and by this love I implore thee to assist me.
Extend thy hand to a poor creature who has fallen
and asks thy help.
Were I a Saint I would not need seek thy mercy;
but because I am a sinner I fly to thee,
who art the Mother of mercies.
I know that thy compassionate heart
finds it a consolation in assisting the miserable,
when thou canst do so,
and dost not find them obstinate.
Console, then, thy compassionate heart,
and console me this day;
for now thou hast the opportunity
of saving a poor creature condemned to Hell;
and thou canst do so,
for I will not be obstinate.
I abandon myself into thy hands,
only tell me what thou wouldst have me do,
and obtain for me strength to execute it,
for I am resolved to do all
that depends on me to recover the Divine grace.
I take refuge under thy mantle.
Jesus wills that I should have recourse to thee,
in order not only that His Blood may save me,
but also that thy prayers may assist me in this great work;
for thy glory. and for His Own,
since thou art His Mother.
He sends me to thee, that thou mayest help me.
O Mary, see, I have recourse to thee;
in thee do I confide.
Thou prayest for so many others,
pray also for me; say only a word.
Tell Our Lord that thou willest my salvation,
and God will certainly save me.
Say that I am thine,
and then I have obtained all that I ask,
all that I desire.

Amen
 
Sorry to hear about this. I suppose you could offer up your grief as reparations to the sacred heart of Jesus.
 
Praying for you and your broken heart.
We are only alive for an instant and we have to
make it count for something, is the only thing I know.
Praying for your peace.

Dan ✞
 
I will pray for you and this person who hurt you so deeply… I too was in a simular position… I know how it is… But i have come to see that these souls are in a pityable state… I pray for their conversion and sorrow… Whoever hurts another person hurts Jesus Himself… He agonized over these souls in the Garden… His suffering there was for souls… and all people are souls… no matter who they are or what they have done… so I pray for them now… I feel sorrow for them… they have put a scar on their own soul and a scar on anothers… If they only knew what they do!!!.. and to whom… I will pray for peace for you and the other soul… I will pray that these feelings you have for revenge leave you, This other soul has sinned… But I pray that you may be released of this affliction and thirst for revenge… I pray to God the Father to watch over you in this trying time … I will have a Mass offered for you… and I will pray to the Father espicially for you… right now… Please do not give in to revenge… I will pray that you can forgive… forgiveness affects your soul…and hers…and that is what really matters… Eternity is a long time…
 
Heavenly Father, we thank you for the gift you have given us of our beloved religious, especially the Sisters who have done so much for us. Do not let Sister Terese feel apart from your love. Grant her the grace of forgiveness and heal her wounds. Respect the dignity of her life’s work and guide her path to a new home where she may carry out your will.
We thank you for this and for all you do.

Amen.
 
***Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of death.

Amen***
 
Prayer To Be Merciful

“Love one another as I have loved you.” (John 15:12)

Help me, Jesus, that what I ask of You (Mercy) I will give to others in word and deed.

Help me, O Lord, that my eyes may be merciful, so that I may never suspect or judge others, but always look for what is beautiful and good in other people.

Help me, that my ears may be merciful, so that I may give heed to others needs, and not be indifferent to their pain.

Help me, O Lord, that my tongue may be merciful, so that I should never speak wrongly of others, but have a word of comfort and forgiveness for all.

Help me, O Lord, that my hands may be merciful and filled with good deeds so that I may do only good to others and always try to take upon myself the more difficult tasks.

Help me, O Lord, that my feet may be merciful, so that I may hurry to assist others, overcoming my own fatigue and weariness, contemplating Your love and mercy.

Help me, O Lord, to forgive and forget. This is Your greatest gift to me, and should be mine for Your sake, to all who offend me.

(Adapted from St. Faustina’s Diary)
 
Praying for you Sister and hoping that the Holy Spirit will help rid your heart of the desire of revenge. I know what it feels like to be hurt by someone you love very much. All you can do is pray for yourself and this other person.

Thanks for your service by the way as a teacher and principal.
 
Thank you all for your words of encouragement and your prayers, especially the Mass. I know that my feelings are wrong–probably a temptation from the evil one who knows our most vulnerable weaknesses. I still struggle. At night when I am trying to get to sleep (I have insomnia to boot!), I lie awake with thoughts of how I can get back at her–and there are many, easy ways to do that. So far, by the Grace of God go I, I have not yet acted upon these feelings. I am deeply devoted to the Passion of Our Lord, and have a very, very deep devotion to the Shroud of Turin. I know Our Lord suffered indescribable tortures for all of us–including betrayal from St. Peter, my name’s sake. I guess this is just too fresh in my mind and heart. So, I will continue to battle this with prayer, fasting, and penance.

Thanks again for all your posts and prayers.

Sr. Terese Peter
 
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