i love what St. Therese of Lisieux said about her first Communion…
"My First Communion will always be a perfect memory, and I am sure I could not have been better prepared than I was. Do you remember the wonderful little book you have me three months before the great day? It was set out so beautifully and prepared me surely step by step; even though I had been thinking for so long about my First Communion, I had to renew my ardor and fill my heart with freshly gathered flowers. So every day, I made many sacrifices and acts of love, which were transformed into flowers; some were violets and roses, others cornflowers and daisies and forget-me-nots. I wanted all the flowers on earth to cradle Jesus in my heart…
…How lovely it was, that first kiss of Jesus in my heart - it was truly a kiss of love. I knew that I was loved and said, “I love You, and I give myself to You forever”. Jesus asked for nothing, He claimed no sacrifice. Long before that, He and little Therese had seen and understood one another well, but on that day it was more than a meeting - it was a complete fusion. We were no longer two, for Therese had disappeared like a drop of water lost in the mighty ocean. Jesus alone remained - the Master and the King. Had she not asked Him to take away her liberty, the liberty she feared? She felt so weak and frail that she wanted to unite herself forever to His Divine Strength. And her joy became so vast, so deep, that now it overflowed. Soon she was weeping, to the astonishment of her companions, who said to one another later on: “why did she cry? was there something on her conscience? perhaps it was because her mother was not there, or the Carmelite sister she loves so much”. It was beyond them that all the joy of Heaven had entered one small, exiled heart, and that it was too frail and weak to bear it without tears. As if the absense of my mother could make me unhappy on the day of my First Communion! As all Heaven entered my soul when I received Jesus, my mother came to me as well. Nor could I cry because you were not there, we were closer than ever before. It was joy alone, deep ineffable joy that filled my heart.
…There seemed to be a veil of melancholy over the day that followed. My dresses, lovely as they were, and my presents - these could never fill my heart. Jesus alone could do that, and I longed for the wonderful moment when He would come a second time. This was on Ascension Day, when I had the joy of kneeling at the altar rails between Father and my darling Marie. Again there were tears of indescribable joy upon my cheeks, while I murmured time and time again the words of St. Paul: “I live, now not I, but Christ liveth in me”. (Gal. 2:20)
After this second visit of Our Lord, I longed for nothing but to receive Him. This was allowed on all the major feasts, but how far apart they seemed. Marie used to prepare me on the eve of these great days, just as she had done for my First Communion, and once I remember she spoke of suffering and said she was sure that God would always carry me like a little child and not make me tread that path. These words came back to me after Communion the next day, and I was convinced that there was many a cross in store for me. Then my soul was filled with such a flood of consolation as I have never had in all my life. Suffering began to attract me; I found charms in it which captivated me without yet fully understanding it. I felt another great desire: to love God only and find my joy in Him alone. Often during my thanksgivings, I repeated the passage from the Imitation: “O Jesus! unspeakable sweetness, turn earthly consolations into bitterness for me”. These words came to my lips without any effort. I said them as a child recites what someone it loves has prompted, without fully grasping what it means."
(Story of a Soul)