What do you look for?

[missmorgan389]

I’m in the process of coming to terms with the fact that I need a new parish. I’m entering a new stage in my life, and I’m ready to move on from the parish that I was raised at. It’s nothing that happened to me, I just need a new place to worship. So my question to you is: what keeps you going to the same church? Community? The priest? Location? What are some things about your church that you think is lacking in other churches?

 

[JRKH]

The only thing that I “look for” is kneelers…
I just can’t get my head around Catholic Churches sans kneelers…
Beyond that they all have Jesus so…its all good.

I do have to admit a preference for older structures. Our EF mass is held in an old church just outside of downtown…Beautiful…

Peace
James

 

[929dad]

My wife and I are in a similar boat, and I can’t give you a concrete answer.

But, I can offer this thought, which is how I’m trying to look at this part of my faith journey…
God knows where he wants us to be. When we get there, we’ll know.

As the previous poster points out, Jesus is present, Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity (In a valid Catholic Church to avoid all the tangential posts). Finding a new community of believers to celebrate His presence might take time, but you won’t be on the road alone!

 

[midori]

My current church is my church-by-default, since it’s a block away. My next two choices are 35 and 45 minutes away, respectively, in opposite directions. Ahh, the joys of a teeny rural parish, but I’m lucky to have one.

Back when I was in the DFW area, I had my pick of churches, and had three or four that I went to regularly while I was there.

The first church I regularly attended because the priest was a fabulous homilist. After he got transferred, I started looking around at some of the other parishes in my area.

Another church I went to because it was really inspiring to see the young, vibrant families. It was a church on the wrong side of the tracks, and the parishioners were poor and struggling, but the atmosphere was very attractive. The priest was an Episcopalean convert, so having the combined experiences of a convert and a married priest were unique, and I loved his regular use of incense and just his general respect and mannerisms that he brought.

A third church I went to was the local cathedral, since it was across the street from my office. Very convenient for going to Mass on my lunch break; not so great for Confession.

A fourth church I went to offered the Latin Mass via the FSSP. The homilies were very scholarly and direct; the Gregorian chant at the High Masses was beautiful; and the congregation was very focused and devout.

I was very fortunate to have such a richness to choose from, and that’s part of why I never really stuck to one church in the first place.

 

[Padraig1972]

I’m in the process of coming to terms with the fact that I need a new parish. I’m entering a new stage in my life, and I’m ready to move on from the parish that I was raised at. It’s nothing that happened to me, I just need a new place to worship. So my question to you is: what keeps you going to the same church? Community? The priest? Location? What are some things about your church that you think is lacking in other churches?

The reason i attend the parish that i do is because:

1. The community.
2. The priest, he is great, very helpfull and incredibly gifted.
3. Location: as it is 20 mins away from home by subway
4. And that im getting a chance to become an altar server (i am the first adult altar server in the parish history - yes, im writing history these days).

Other churches lacks the prescence of the franciscan spirituality that is in these walls (it was from 1965-2008 a franciscan parish and monestary).

 

[TimothyH]

I believe that the primary sign of a healthy and holy parish is that it is a Eucharistic community.

All the beatiful liturgy and wonderful architecture in the world doesn’t matter if a parish is not united around the Eucharist. A parish that is united around the Eucharist can do anything. A parish that is not united around the Eucharist is probably lukewarm and divided. If you see reverence for and devotion to the Eucharist - adorations, benedictions, and of course the Mass - then God is probably doing amazing things there. A parish that is united around our Lord in the Eucharist probably has a vibrant parish life including holy men and woman who are raising holy children. They probably serve the poor generously, are at peace among themselves, pray for each other, help each other in times of need, and produce many vocations to the priesthood and religious life. In short, they probably love each other as described in 1 John.

Second after that is consecration, or at least a strong devotion to Mary.

I am blessed to have moved to an amazing parish. The priests in our parish can be found any weekday, after the 7:00 AM Mass and before the 9:00 AM Mass, in the perpetual adoration chapel praying the liturgy and the rosary. If you find a priest who adores Jesus and prays the rosary to our Blessed Mother, you have found a jewel. Perpetual adoration was one of the reasons I moved to the parish. We also consecrate the parish to Mary every January 1.

The architecture and music are just side dishes. The Eucharist and Mary are the meat and potatoes. If the community is a strong Eucharistic community, everything else sorts itself out.

That’s just my opinion.

-Tim-

 

[TimothyH]

And that im getting a chance to become an altar server (i am the first adult altar server in the parish history - yes, im writing history these days).

Wonderful. I’m an adult altar server too. We have an Arimathean ministry, where we not only serve at weekday and Saturday Masses but we serve at funerals too. I think that is very important that the community show up for funerals. The fact that altar servers show up and assist, make it reverent, shows the community that we care about our members.

Here in the deep south, many Baptists and non-denominationalists will come to the funeral of a coworker or family member. I think it is a great testimony to our faith when we assist at funerals and show how much we love each other.

I wish you well and hope God blesses you. And if I may give unsolicited advice, there are two primary rules I go by… It’s better to get the book, chalice, water and wine to the priest early than it is to get there late, and don’t drop the dishes!

-Tim-

 

[OscarsMama]

I understand the situation of looking around for a parish. I grew up in the same town in the same church. I did everything in that church–with the same priest!!! It was hard to find a different parish.

I live in a major city so there are a ton of churches within driving distance. The one that I joined is not the closet, but the priests there give GREAT homilies. I think that the church is pretty. I like their adult faith formation program (classes for adults about various different topics). It is a Jesuit parish. I didn’t know anything about that prior, but now that I am there, I really like it.

Homilies are the big things for me, though.

 

[TrueLight]

I look for a traditional mass with good, traditional priests.

I look for meaty sermons.

I look for community (coffee hour, etc). A plus is devout members who can help me grow spiritually and opportunities to help others as well.

 

[SecretGarden]

During my journey, I have attended many churches over the years so I can sympathize your struggle. It’s been my experience that the church generally finds the person when the time is right. That is what happened with all of the churches I’ve attended including the one I am at presently. I learned and grew alot at each place for the following is what I suggest:

1)Ask yourself why are you wanting to leave your spiritual home. The reasons are numerous and it is important to be honest with yourself. I find writing them down in a list can help can clear the clouds as my mother tells me.

2)Pray to God and ask him if there is anything else you should add to the list

1. Now it’s time to ask him two things. a) ask him what he wants you to do? Should you leave or should you stay. This will take time so you need to be patient. If it is His will to please guide you towards this next step.
2. If the door to leave is quite apparent, pray and ask God to guide you towards the right place. This is the hardest aspect because it is called: church shopping. This is when you are going to be experiencing new things such as music might be different from what you are used to. The homilies, the people, everything will be different in some way. You may enjoy the difference or you may feel uncomfortable. Both feelings are normal and it’s important to be honest with yourself and God.
3. As you explore, slowly create another list with a few points that is important to you. For example when I was searching for my present church, at the time, I had recently made the decision to become Catholic it was important to have a minister who I could ask questions, and talk to if a spiritual problem arose. I wanted a warm loving congregation where I felt welcomed as well as a place where I could serve God and be spiritually challenged. I found that inside my church but it required prayer and having an open heart.
4. seriously seek God in this. Be willing to try new locations and churches that are farther away than you would like. For example, for a few years, I attended a church that was located about an hour and a half to two hours away from my house. The commute was insane but I learned so much from that church. It prepared me for my present church.
5. As you explore, don’t become discouraged because sometimes the right church will be your first stop as was the case with my present church or it might be number 10 in a bunch of other visits. One simply doesn’t know. The right place will come when you are spiritually ready for it.
6. As it becomes apparent that a particular church feels right, get involved in it by volunteering somehow. I strongly encourage this because you will learn alot about the church in a short amount of time vs attending a year’s worth of Sundays. I have done that with every church I have ever attended and it has been worth the while because in the process I was able to make friends and join the community. One also sees how people interact with each other outside of mass. Those interactions become important because that’s when you see how the church runs and you can decide if you want to be part of it or not.
7. Regardless of what you see, it is important to continue to seek God because you may not like what you see and he may want you to remain there for a while either for you to learn something from someone or for your gifts to be used in a Christ like way manner. God’s plans are never clear therefore you need to be sensitive to God’s plans because the journey is incredible.
8. Have fun and enjoy the ride. The most unexpected can be the best gift of all.