What do you need to hear when discerning?

[Sister_Helena]

Discerners need to get the straight and honest poop on anything they ask about the lifestyle they are choosing. Like a child learning about “growing up”, if they are at the stage in their development to ask it, they are ready to learn and process its meaning for them at that time. They deserve to know the good, the bad, and the ugly, because although a congregation/diocese will risk much by having them enter, the person who enters risks all. If it is truly information that cannot be shared, the discerner should be fully informed why, in reasonable and adult terms, and both parties should continue to seek and resolve the heart of the matter. Anything less is suspicious, irresponsible, and cult-like. Leaving somebody in the dark about something important as a test of obedience is a sick behavior, and in a college fraternity that would be known as hazing (and illegal).

Anything in particular you would like to know?

 

[Sister_Helena]

I’m going to introduce my self a little bit first.
I’m 17 and have known that I’m going to be a nun for five years, in January 2008 I went on the March for Life in Washington DC and that’s when I found that I’m called to join the Sisters of Life in New York City.

One of the things that I would really like to have is people not telling me that I’m too young or that I should wait a while before I make a final choice. Also I just want my peers and older friends to let me be who I am and be fine with that.

JMJ+
~Betsy

Totus tuus Maria!

Hello Betsy,

I know what you mean. I was twenty when I went serious with Religious life and entered at 23. Although 23 is not 17, still I had the same reaction you do. My parents were very much against it. I was so impatient that if it was a man I fell in love with, I would have eloped! But sometimes waiting is good for many reasons. It tests your resolve, it makes you grow in virtues, it tests you, it also gives you time to acquire whatever educational pursuits you may need to have to better serve God, especially if the Community you are entering will benefit from it. It is all for the good. On the other hand, if we don’t fix our eyes on the goal and do not live according to the expectations befitting our deepest desire, one can lose a religious vocation. So I guess, simply put, live in the world for as long as God wills it, but live your life deeply aware of your desire to give yourself to Him in religious life. When the bride is ready, God will take her. I remember this very vividly when I couldn’t enter the time I wanted. I went to the Chapel of the monastery in tears and told Our Lord, “I guess I’m not good enough for you yet. The bride is not ready. Your will be done. But I will return and keep myself for You.” And God gave me the grace to keep my promise.

 

[Sister_Helena]

1. Info. I agree with TeresaAnn that websites MATTER! A community’s website is it’s face to people who aren’t quite ready to make formal contact. I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t make an appointment, a major purchase or contact with an order before doing web research. There are many communities I crossed off the shortlist quickly once I found their website. And there were communities that made the list just as quickly because I found their website. It doesn’t have to be fancy, but it does need to be honest and accurately describe the community.

Blessings!

I work on our website www.carmelitesisters.com I would like to have some feedback on how it is.
Thanks!

 

[Spiritu]

I work on our website www.carmelitesisters.com I would like to have some feedback on how it is.
Thanks!

I found it clear, elegant and easy to navigate, with just the right amount of information for a first point of contact. The photograph of the chapel on the homepage is a good idea, as is the use of domestic and workplace photos throughout - I find photos invaluable in forming an impression of a community.

 

[Sister_Helena]

I found it clear, elegant and easy to navigate, with just the right amount of information for a first point of contact. The photograph of the chapel on the homepage is a good idea, as is the use of domestic and workplace photos throughout - I find photos invaluable in forming an impression of a community.

Thank you! I’ am new to web site and will appreciate feedbacks. Yours was helpful. Thanks again!