What does Divine Mercy mean to you?

[wgholland]

As I have been brought to an introduction to Divine Mercy through what I have read, I struggle with something. I shared the chaplet with my CCD class and enjoy the times when I catch it at 3pm each day. Mercy has been on my heart overall this past year. My spiritual director suggested this book, Premidated Mercy. Ugh. I can’t even get through the whole thing. It seems I can’t get there.

So my question to any interested parties in discussing this, is this. How do you discern between being merciful and opening others heart to His overflowing mercy and excusing behavior that is less than acceptable??

I can understand as a parent one might control their temper when correcting or over-correcting a child. Or forgiving a friend or loved one who has wronged you or even the idiot driver you’d like to call an idiot. But does it really mean dismissing behavior entirely?? I am struggling with this so much. I guess God has done that for me, but it seems to me that luke-warm Christians constantly say well you shouldn’t judge. Shouldn’t we?? Shouldn’t we be able to say, “What you are doing is wrong.”? Are we as Christians really supposed to take whatever abuse and ungrateful behavior comes our way and go back for more??? So then everything everyone does is okay and shouldn’t bother me or upset me or hurt me??? Man I am struggling with this and what it means. In my spiritual sense I think yes, that is what it means. But in my human sense I think- no way.

In the sense of making others aware of God’s mercy, I can totally do that b/c I am hoping for the same mercy myself and so thankful it is has been made available to me. But is it a blanket, everyone do what you want thing?? while I sit by and offer you my mercy…what is my mercy, except to acknowledge that we are all in need of mercy from the Lord himself??? To not, hold bitterness in my heart??? Sure, I get that. So beyond that, what are we to do?? How do we participate??

What I struggle with is the perception that b/c you are a Christian you should be a doormat. Ya’lls thoughts pls.

God’s blessings to all of His children.

 

[InLight247]

What I struggle with is the perception that b/c you are a Christian you should be a doormat. Ya’lls thoughts pls.

Forgiving and consenting are two different things. Showing mercy is not to be lack of principle. Christians are not meant to be walked over or taken advantage of. Jesus taught us to be pure as a dove yet alert as a serpent. We ought to protect ourselves, to stay alert, not allow us to become victims. If we were wronged, we should do our best to forgive, not to hold grudges. But we learn from our experience and avoid same situation in the future.

What should we do if we witnessed some unacceptable behavior? It depends on the issue. For example, if we see a wild behaving child of our friend’s, it is up to his parents to correct him. But if this is my child or my student, it is my responsibility to show him the acceptable way. If we see someone being abused, we should report it; otherwise we are helping the evil. By doing so, we are not judging, we are basing on the fact to help the oppressed. If one of our friends or coworkers likes to gossip, we do not have to listen, we can politely say “Let’s not talk about that.” After a few times, the person will get the message. These are just a few examples I think of.

Jesus is merciful to us so we should be merciful to others. Jesus does not tolerate sin, neither should we.

 

[jpjd]

As I read in Living Faith recently, Jesus told us to be loving; he never said we always had to be nice. It is love to do what it takes to follow the teachings of Christ.

You asked, “How do you discern between being merciful and opening others heart to His overflowing mercy and excusing behavior that is less than acceptable??” This is where your problem is. Mercy is NOT excusing behavior that is less than acceptable. Mercy is forgiving a contrite sinner. But the sinner must always be contrite, and there must always be desire to turn away in the future from the problem behavior.

Love isn’t always about being nice. As any parent will tell you, sometimes love manifests itself in saying “no,” giving a reprimand, or standing firm in the face of wrongdoing. Love is following God, and it is love to show correction. (Please note, correction should be gentle but firm, not harsh.) The same concept applies in dealing with our family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, etc.

I don’t understand where you get the idea that being a Christian means being a doormat. Even Jesus got angry and threw the moneychangers out of the temple.

 

[wgholland]

Oh no I don’t think being a Christian means being a doormat…but if you run into luke-warm Christians they will throw that at you. Everything ya’ll have said I adhere to, forgiveness when there is repentence, not rude or unkind or unloving, yes, yes. I have just noticed that there are people who will not speak up for what is correct and adopt the attitude that “Well it is their life.” or “It’s not bothering me, so I am not going to say anything.” or “They’ll figure it out.” And I just wonder to myself if that is truly the more Christian approach. It is more difficult to help people correctly, it is always more difficult to speak when silence is easier. But in my grappling w/ the issue of mercy and am I participating in that properly I began to wonder if I was under the wrong impression. Glad to know that I’m probably not. I also realize we don’t always need to speak, and when we do it should be preceded w/ prayer for the correct words.

Our culture is just filled with an attitude that of not getting involved to avoid seeming judgemental. Not our Church culture mind you but that of the world. For instance, I have three step-children and my husband constantly tells me I am judgemental. However, there are issues of bad debt, outstanding debt, jail, and vehicle repo…all self inflicted, I am not judgemental, but I am not going to continue to give more financial help to adults really who don’t value or dont’ appreciate it. I don’t think that is judgemental it is a healthy boundary that neither fosters more hurt to themselves or our finances but instead demands responsibility. Or our daughter who has NSF transactions causing us to have to pay the fees and who has never apologized for that, she’s says they were that high. Well, yes they are kids, but I don’t see why they can’t be held accountable for their actions with consequences. Why am I supposed to overlook all of that and not expect better behavior?? Or at least responsible behavior?? So it got me to thinking that maybe I wasn’t merciful enough. If it were my own daughter, I would not expect any different, respect, consideration, appreciation…however, my husband feels that you just let everyone live their own life and don’t try to get involved. So I get drummed down b/c I have standards. Standards that all kids especially teens and young adults have difficulty living up to, but…do I need to just look away and say “Oh well, not my kids”?

Now someone who does drugs (like my imprisoned brother) yes I have pity and mercy on them b/c they don’t know any better or can’t get out of it…but I do not condone it, but I pray for him and I still expect him to repent and change his life. I won’t give him money to continue that behavior and can’t really help him unless he really wants to change.

Same thing w/ anyone doing anything wrong. I can offer them kindness, seeing Christ in them, but it would be un-Christian of me to enable them to continue in pattern of poor choices. So this relationship w/ my step-daughter is strained and my husband says it’s because I am too hard on her, but I don’t feel like I have been, I feel like I have treated her as I would anyone else’s daughter. My introspection is that I have not been merciful but to condone her attitude toward me, is then to be walked on, in my mind. As an adult I find that offensive, as a Christian I find it hurtful, and I do attempt to have interaction while being still protective of myself. I have put myself out there numerous occasions and as most step-children do, have not been appreciated. So it’s like I can’t say anything and can just respond good or really? Can’t really have a conversation about what is really proper w/o getting eye-rolling or being cut off. So they think I’m a prude basically who is out of touch w/ world.

More than you wanted to know prob. huh?? Thanks for listening and I’m thinking I am still on the right track despite this hangup w/ my step-daughter.

 

[cheeto1]

Our culture is just filled with an attitude that of not getting involved to avoid seeming judgemental.

That’s my attitude. I know I’m judgemental, and I don’t want to
cause anybody any problems, so when I meet divorced people
who are remarried, I just don’t ask any questions and try not to
get to know them too well. I wouldn’t want to get in a position
where I felt I had to tell them that what they were doing was
wrong.

 

[CatholismRox]

The Mercy of Jesus Christ.

 

[Em_in_FL]

As I have been brought to an introduction to Divine Mercy through what I have read, I struggle with something. I shared the chaplet with my CCD class and enjoy the times when I catch it at 3pm each day. Mercy has been on my heart overall this past year. My spiritual director suggested this book, Premidated Mercy. Ugh. I can’t even get through the whole thing. It seems I can’t get there.

So my question to any interested parties in discussing this, is this. How do you discern between being merciful and opening others heart to His overflowing mercy and excusing behavior that is less than acceptable??

There is no “excusing” for behavior that is less than acceptable. Mercy is far from saying the behavior is correct or acceptable.
Mercy is looking at the entire person… looking at their interior struggles and empathizing with them. Not with the behavior, but with the broken humanity that led them to the behavior…

I can understand as a parent one might control their temper when correcting or over-correcting a child. Or forgiving a friend or loved one who has wronged you or even the idiot driver you’d like to call an idiot. But does it really mean dismissing behavior entirely?? I am struggling with this so much. I guess God has done that for me, but it seems to me that luke-warm Christians constantly say well you shouldn’t judge. Shouldn’t we?? Shouldn’t we be able to say, “What you are doing is wrong.”? Are we as Christians really supposed to take whatever abuse and ungrateful behavior comes our way and go back for more??? So then everything everyone does is okay and shouldn’t bother me or upset me or hurt me??? Man I am struggling with this and what it means. In my spiritual sense I think yes, that is what it means. But in my human sense I think- no way.

My husband and I have discussed this a lot… and we’ve used an analogy that seems to help… using the words “conservative” and “liberal”…
You should always be CONSERVATIVE in your expectations of YOURSELF… and LIBERAL in your expectations of OTHERS…

In the sense of making others aware of God’s mercy, I can totally do that b/c I am hoping for the same mercy myself and so thankful it is has been made available to me. But is it a blanket, everyone do what you want thing?? while I sit by and offer you my mercy…what is my mercy, except to acknowledge that we are all in need of mercy from the Lord himself??? To not, hold bitterness in my heart??? Sure, I get that. So beyond that, what are we to do?? How do we participate??

What I struggle with is the perception that b/c you are a Christian you should be a doormat. Ya’lls thoughts pls.

God’s blessings to all of His children.

I like to put myself in the place of the other person (true empathy). How would it feel if you heard others speak to you about your choices as being sinful?
How would you like them to approach you on these types of choices?
Would you prefer them to come down HARD on you? Or to sympathetically offer moral alternatives?

Mercy is redirecting sinful actions towards moral ones in a loving manner.

 

[wgholland]

I like to put myself in the place of the other person (true empathy). How would it feel if you heard others speak to you about your choices as being sinful?
How would you like them to approach you on these types of choices?
Would you prefer them to come down HARD on you? Or to sympathetically offer moral alternatives?

Mercy is redirecting sinful actions towards moral ones in a loving manner.

Yes that is a very good way to consider things. And I know that people don’t always succeed in making internal changes the first time…well I don’t. Like Paul I know what I should do and do otherwise in spite of my self understanding of the need to be or do differently. And everyone goes through that as well. I can be extremely empathetic in that regard. Getting up and falling down quite often myself. I mean we all go to confession, so we all understand the frailty of the flesh.

I find your thought regard conservative and liberal especially refreshing, thanks.

See so often I’ve just thought of mercy as something I get from Jesus. Not really in the context of what am I offering to others. I don’t consider myself unmerciful, but just hadn’t concentrated on that before. I’m sure that seems immature to ya’ll, but I know my own need for mercy and pretty much focused on that.

 

[wgholland]

That’s my attitude. I know I’m judgemental, and I don’t want to
cause anybody any problems, so when I meet divorced people
who are remarried, I just don’t ask any questions and try not to
get to know them too well. I wouldn’t want to get in a position
where I felt I had to tell them that what they were doing was
wrong.

I know precisely what you mean. I had a homosexual man do my nails and pedicure the other day. That takes a LONG time, but it was a package and I couldn’t select who did what. So I listened, openly, and actually heard a yearning. I tried to consciously see him as Christ does and see Christ in him. He takes his nieces and nephews to mass still, and he spoke abt his involvement w/ some non-denom church and I just cautioned him to be wary as often those churches are anti-Catholic. He agreed and said he might start going more often back to Catholic church. I tried not to dwell on the mortal sin issue in my mind, but just wanted to be there to encourage him however I could. This was a huge test for me, b/c normally I might have found the owner and made other arrangements, even faked some need to leave. I believe though too that God arranges appointments for us, both to witness and to be helped by others he brings into our lives…so I keep my antenae up for both. I contemplated telling him about Courage, but decided that should wait. I may never see him again, but maybe he’ll slowly see what he needs to do.

 

[puzzleannie]

So my question to any interested parties in discussing this, is this. How do you discern between being merciful and opening others heart to His overflowing mercy and excusing behavior that is less than acceptable??

I can understand as a parent one might control their temper when correcting or over-correcting a child. Or forgiving a friend or loved one who has wronged you or even the idiot driver you’d like to call an idiot. But does it really mean dismissing behavior entirely?? I am struggling with this so much. .

Mercy and forgiveness does not mean condoning, accepting, promoting or enabling sinful or harmful behaviors. Quite the opposite. It means reminding both sinners and victims of sin of the endless power of God’s mercy, and the need for contrition for our own sins, and forgiveness of those who hurt us. Forgiveness means relinquishing the hold the offense has on our own emotions and spiritual well-being, and allowing God to heal what has been hurt. Never anywhere does Jesus say forgiveness means allowing the offender to continue in the offense, in fact he says the opposite.