What helps you accept your suffering?

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Knowing this:

Your Cross - St Francis de Sales
The everlasting God has

in His wisdom foreseen

from eternity the cross

that He now presents to you

as a gift from His inmost heart.

This cross He now sends you

He has considered with His all-knowing eyes,

understood with His divine mind,

tested with His wise justice,

warmed with loving arms

and weighed with His own hands

to see that it be not one inch too large

and not one ounce too heavy for you.

He has blessed it with His holy Name,

anointed it with His consolation,

taken one last glance at you

and your courage,

and then sent it to you from heaven,

a special greeting from God to you,

an alms of the all-merciful love of God.
 
I’ve been dealing with this a lot lately!

I’m sure there are many people suffering more than me so usually i do this
  1. Feel guilty for feeling like I’m suffering when I really don’t have it that bad
  2. Try to offer it to Jesus for His purposes anyway b/c little things count too
  3. Feel guilty for feeling guilty
  4. Struggle
  5. More guilt
  6. Wonder how in the world I’m supposed to act joyful and suffer at the same time
  7. Apologize to Jesus for complaining
  8. Beg for help
  9. Move on
I’ve read a lot of literature lately that has really put suffering in perspective for me and has given me hope that when it gets worse, which it will, some good will come out of it.

St. Faustina really helps me, St. Therese of Liseux as well. They suffered way more than I do and did it so happily!!! They begged for more! ( I haven’t even come close to that yet)

My advice, read read read and pray pray pray. Ask every single Saint in Heaven to pray for graces so you can deal with your crosses with Christ–like humility and perseverance.

I just keep telling myself over and over and over again that it will be over soon and I’m showing Jesus how much I love Him by doing so.

Sorry for the long post and the jumping about. My mind is all over the place tonight.
 
Sometimes I succeed at it, sometimes I don’t.

The most helpful things are:
  • Uniting my sufferings to those of Jesus and offering them for the salvation of souls
  • reading about saints who suffered terribly and how they bore it
  • when I start getting angry or indulging in self-pity, I go to Confession.
The cycle mentioned by FaustinaClare is familiar to me, but I came to the conclusion years ago that comparing one’s sufferings to those of others is to be avoided at all cost, as it is pointless and the guilt or pride resulting from it does nothing good. It is a temptation to be resisted. I also try not to think about whether the suffering will be over (it probably won’t anyway) or get worse - I just focus on the present. St. Therese of Lisieux said “We have only this moment to suffer.”

In a book I’m reading called “I Believe in Love,” about St. Therese’s spirituality, the priest who wrote it says that when we fail to accept suffering joyfully, we can offer to Jesus the pain that comes from recognizing our failure. God allows us to be humbled by failing in this. There is a whole section in that book called “The Cross” that I found very helpful.
 
I don’t think I accept suffering well, and am simply grateful to God for getting me through it.
I do try to offer up suffering, when I remember to do so, with the Fatima prayer:

“Oh My God, it is for love of You, in reparation for sins committed against the Immaculate Heart of Mary, and for the conversion of poor sinners” … and I like to add “for the poor souls in purgatory.”
 
Student09 said:
The cycle mentioned by FaustinaClare is familiar to me, but I came to the conclusion years ago that comparing one’s sufferings to those of others is to be avoided at all cost, as it is pointless and the guilt or pride resulting from it does nothing good. It is a temptation to be resisted. I also try not to think about whether the suffering will be over (it probably won’t anyway) or get worse - I just focus on the present. St. Therese of Lisieux said “We have only this moment to suffer.”
l.
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Well by the grace and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ the suffering will be over when we reach Heaven if we continue to follow Him. That’s what I keep telling myself. That this suffering is doing something good and if I persevere I can spend eternity with Jesus. I didn’t mean to imply that I was focusing on when the suffering would be temporarily over.

As for getting worse, St. Faustina asked for more and more to help poor souls. I have yet the courage to do this b/c I know what I ask for in good faith I will receive if it is God’s Will of course. Hopefully one day like Faustina and Therese I will one day look forward and welcome suffering and not fear the pain.
 
This is a good reminder why every Catholic home (and perhaps each room!) should have a beautiful crucifix in a prominent place. Simply glancing at the cross should help accept suffering because Jesus suffered the worst yet He was perfectly innocent. Sure helps put my problems in perspective… :bowdown:
 
When I start to feel sorry for myself for my suffering, I just remind myself there are people that are worse off than I am. That humbles me.

Also, my priest suggested I pray the Rosary daily. I’ve been doing that for more than a month now (I think, lost track of time). Reflecting on it lessens my suffering and my stress. I can’t really explain how or why, but I just know that it does.
 
Knowing that my sufferings can ease the sufferings of those in purgatory and also from knowing that, in my small way, I am offering them up in reperation for the countless sins I commit and those of mankind.
 
FaustinaClare said:
I’ve been dealing with this a lot lately!

I’m sure there are many people suffering more than me so usually i do this
  1. Feel guilty for feeling like I’m suffering when I really don’t have it that bad
  2. Try to offer it to Jesus for His purposes anyway b/c little things count too
  3. Feel guilty for feeling guilty
  4. Struggle
  5. More guilt
  6. Wonder how in the world I’m supposed to act joyful and suffer at the same time
  7. Apologize to Jesus for complaining
  8. Beg for help
  9. Move on
I’ve read a lot of literature lately that has really put suffering in perspective for me and has given me hope that when it gets worse, which it will, some good will come out of it.

St. Faustina really helps me, St. Therese of Liseux as well. They suffered way more than I do and did it so happily!!! They begged for more! ( I haven’t even come close to that yet)

My advice, read read read and pray pray pray. Ask every single Saint in Heaven to pray for graces so you can deal with your crosses with Christ–like humility and perseverance.

I just keep telling myself over and over and over again that it will be over soon and I’m showing Jesus how much I love Him by doing so.

Sorry for the long post and the jumping about. My mind is all over the place tonight.
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Appreciate it! What, do you recommend, that i read?
 
HeWillProvide said:
What helps you live whatever cross you are bearing?
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today I prayed the sorrowful mysteries while I walked this morning, again this afternoon at the parish, and again this evening at the home of a parishioner who has the travelling Fatima statue in her home tonight. At first I thought oh boy, not again, but this time someone read a reflection and the gospel at the beginning of each mystery, and the one for agony in the garden said it teaches us to pray as Jesus prayed. There is my answer. There is a reason I needed to pray these mysteries 3 times today, until I got the message the uniting my suffering with His IS my prayer, the very thing I have been struggling with lately.

I was late for the Fatima presentation because after the middle rosary (which we lead) we waited to help another parishioner gather some things for her neighbors in the colonias, the poorest settlements in the Valley. She herself is needy, on disability, caring for other family members, yet finds time and out of her means helps others, and she related some of their stories to us. Nothing I go through can remotely be described as suffering when compared with the tragedies of others right here in my own city.
 
HeWillProvide said:
Appreciate it! What, do you recommend, that i read?
Click to expand...
I started off with the diary of st. faustina b/c she suffered so much but she did so gladly b/c she knew that the more she suffered the more other souls would find Christ and that souls in purgatory would be released. The diary is a bit long so you can break it up and read a little at a time if you don’t like to read a lot.

A story of a soul by St. Therese of Lisieux. She makes becoming a saint seem more attainable due to her “little way” of offering little sufferings to God.

Interior Castles/Way of perfection by St. Teresa of Avila

Any writings by St. John of the Cross. He suffered a lot for Christ.

I’m sure others on here will be able to offer more books but that was what I started with.

I also have been reading the writings of someone that is in the process of being approved by the Church. Since it hasn’t yet been approved and is a private revelation I can’t talk about that here but if you are interested you can PM. It has been really beneficial just adding another perspective especially since the writer suffers from the same physical ailments that I do.

I hope this helps a little.
 
HeWillProvide said:
What helps you live whatever cross you are bearing?
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Recognizing and not denying my fears, anxieties, powerlessness - and despite all this, still wait in the Lord.

It is my way of accepting whatever the will of the Lord may be because He knows best. I still pray and let the Lord know that I would like a certain outcome to my prayers but His will makes me happy and gives me peace.
 
FaustinaClare said:
Well by the grace and mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ the suffering will be over when we reach Heaven if we continue to follow Him. That’s what I keep telling myself. That this suffering is doing something good and if I persevere I can spend eternity with Jesus. I didn’t mean to imply that I was focusing on when the suffering would be temporarily over.
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I guess if it works for you … didn’t work for me … I am still young so when I would think about Heaven as a relief, I would just end up wishing that I would die soon in a car accident, which is not a healthy thing to be wishing. That’s why I try not to think about it. Sorry to be so dark, but there it is.
 
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