What if I'm only half-repentant?

[fons_vitae]

If I wish to stop certain sins, but am unsuccessful in doing so… am I really contrite?

 

[baltobetsy]

If you make an effort and fail out of weakness, it does not mean you are not contrite. If you make no effort and fail, then you have cause to question your contrition.

 

[fons_vitae]

What about just being split in your intention? Like trying to intellectually make yourself do something good, but not emotionally going along with it or actually carrying it out.

 

[beth40n2]

First of all go to confession if you have not. The I suggest the same confessor every time! You will be embarrassed to confess the same sin, over and over again. It will help you to stop the sin. Also keep track of when you go to confession. You may need to confess every week now, but soon it may be every other week, then once a month.

Stick with the same confessor. And truely try to repent. Also spend lots of time with Jesus in Adoration with the exposed Blessed Sacrament. It will definately help.

I will be praying for you.

 

[lauraabarlow]

Hi-I can certainly relate-being that when I get stressed-out or angry/frustrated, I tend to slip out and use our precious Lord’s Name in vain-I don’t mean to and feel bad afterward-or if someone suddenly pull out in front of me forcing me to slam on brakes to avoid hitting them just to go below the speed limit-say ten miles below-I tend to lose my cool and give an unchristian gesture of sorts. I do try to go to the same confessor-sure he is getting tired of hearing my same sins/problems yet not having to explain every detail like with a new confessor-I was told by him the God loves me and being human expects me to make mistakes-which can and does lead to sin-that is why we have these sacraments. I am truly sorry and try to do better yet being human-well-that is unfortunately my sin problem. I want to do the right things. If you feel bad afterwards, you are remorseful. Repent, if I am not mistaken means feeling remorseful and wanting to turn away from sins yet being human–we are going to make mistakes. It happens-I would just march right into confessional and bring this up to the priest-your sins and slip-ups and see what he has to say. Good luck-and Happy New Year! :harp:

 

[Tsuwano]

As a Trappist monk once declared when asked what in the world the monks do in their monastery day after day, “We get up and fall down and get up again and fall, and get up again.” In other words, we all sin, and sometimes it is the same sin over and over again, but our Lord calls us to rise again just as often as we fall. Have a little faith in God’s grace. You may get tired of falling over and over again, but the Lord will never get tired of lifting you up.

 

[puzzleannie]

If I wish to stop certain sins, but am unsuccessful in doing so… am I really contrite?

yes, but still human like the rest of us. If one confession was enough to stop us from sinning we would need the sacrament only once.
Contrition is not a feeling but an action, that is why the prayer that expresses the intention to take the action is called an “ACT” of contrition. You demonstrate contrition by working diligently to combat the sin itself, removing yourself from the conditions that facilitate the sin, and developing the contrasting virtue actively.

 

[NeedImprovement]

If I wish to stop certain sins, but am unsuccessful in doing so… am I really contrite?

You might find the Catehcism of the Catholic Church helpful - the link is here Sections 1451 - 1454 would be the most pertinent.

Imperfect contrition is enough to receive the sacrament of Reconciliation . There are also habitual sins, which in certain cases can have some of the guilt mitigated.

*What if I’m only half contrite *and it’s cousin , What if I’m not fully guilty have, in my own personal life, presented themselves as obstacles at times . I decided it best to go to Confession and receive the sacrament just the same and to leave it in God’s hands to determine the precise degree of my guilt in those cases, and to simply admit that I’m guilty.

There are advantages to having the same confessor each time as beth40n2 says: He would be able to help you see if at times you might be abusing the Sacrament or perhaps overdoing it (less agonizing and headaches for you that way). He would also have the advantage of being able to answer your question within the context of how it applies to you personally.



God Bless

 

[JRKH]

If I wish to stop certain sins, but am unsuccessful in doing so… am I really contrite?

What about just being split in your intention? Like trying to intellectually make yourself do something good, but not emotionally going along with it or actually carrying it out.

It sounds to me like the little boy who wants to stop wetting the bed but just can’t seem to do it. Intellectually you know that your thoughts and actions are wrong, but you don’t have sufficient control of your “lower functions” (emotions and actions). This is not an uncommon condition for one who is immature in their faith. In fact it takes a lot of time and effort to overcome this.
The problem called, “affection for sin”. Even though you know you need to stop doing and even stop thinking a certain way your “natural” self still wishes to derive pleasure from it. It is to this that Jesus speaks in the fifth chapter of Matthew when he tell us that not only must we not kill but we must no become angry with our neighbor - Not only must we not commit adultery, be must not "lust after (impure thoughts) another. He is speaking to this idea of deriving pleasure from an effection for sin.

The Spiritual Journey is about Love for God, for ourselves and for our neighbor. There is no room in that Love for harboring that which offends the object of our Love, which is God, and weakens us in our love for our neighbor.

There is hope though. God knows where you are spiritually and understands. That does not mean He is satisfied, and neither should you be. Therefore you must embark on the race, the spiritual bootcamp, the repentance diet. Commit to ferreting out these fatty and weighty effections for sin and getting rid of them. Replace them with lean and beautiful virtues and holy habits. Recognize that this takes time and effort and committment and you will likely fall repeatedly, but persevere.

Lastly, in direct answer to your question, I must say that I don’t know how your “half-repentant” confession effects the absolution. I’d say that your desire to be contrite and your effort in going to confession prevents you from being in a state of mortal sin.
However, I’d strongly suggest speaking with your confessor about this.

Peace
James

 

[fons_vitae]

First of all go to confession if you have not. The I suggest the same confessor every time! You will be embarrassed to confess the same sin, over and over again. It will help you to stop the sin. Also keep track of when you go to confession. You may need to confess every week now, but soon it may be every other week, then once a month.

Stick with the same confessor. And truely try to repent. Also spend lots of time with Jesus in Adoration with the exposed Blessed Sacrament. It will definately help.

I will be praying for you.

Thank you. As utilitarian as it is, though, I’d really like my first confession to be fully valid (since I get confirmed this Easter). But I may just ask for spiritual direction from my priest when I meet with him again.

 

[fons_vitae]

There is hope though. God knows where you are spiritually and understands. That does not mean He is satisfied, and neither should you be. Therefore you must embark on the race, the spiritual bootcamp, the repentance diet. Commit to ferreting out these fatty and weighty effections for sin and getting rid of them. Replace them with lean and beautiful virtues and holy habits.

Hey, I use food as an metaphor for vice and virtue as well!

 

[JRKH]

Hey, I use food as an metaphor for vice and virtue as well!

With society’s obsession with health and fitness and sports etc, and the number of commercials on TV for every sort of diet, and the mere fact that many/most of us want to be more healthy, or know others who are struggling with diet and health issues, it seems a “no brainer” comparison. Especially so when we, as sinners, get angry or depressed at ourselves (or God) because the sin (and temptation) isn’t gone like magic “pooph”.

Sin, like weight, like smoking, like any bad habit takes time to overcome. The first step in any successful plan though is committmen. No your enemy, demonize him, hate him, hate anything that he loves and then destroy him.
It’s just as true with sin as it is with bad eating habits.

Peace
James

 

[mdrummer5]

With society’s obsession with health and fitness and sports etc, and the number of commercials on TV for every sort of diet, and the mere fact that many/most of us want to be more healthy, or know others who are struggling with diet and health issues, it seems a “no brainer” comparison. Especially so when we, as sinners, get angry or depressed at ourselves (or God) because the sin (and temptation) isn’t gone like magic “pooph”.

Sin, like weight, like smoking, like any bad habit takes time to overcome. The first step in any successful plan though is committmen. No your enemy, demonize him, hate him, hate anything that he loves and then destroy him.
It’s just as true with sin as it is with bad eating habits.

Peace
James

I realize that you’re referring to inanimate object (food, cigarettes etc.) but I find your choice of wording disturbing. It’s a highly subjective question but is there any greater sin than to hate?

Also I would disagree with it taking time to overcome. It’s a matter of truly using the free will that God gave us. I smoked for several years until I decided it was time to stop. I threw away what was left of the pack that I had and have not smoked since. It’s merely a matter of having resolve in your decision. Yes I made it sound easy… because it is.

 

[JRKH]

I realize that you’re referring to inanimate object (food, cigarettes etc.) but I find your choice of wording disturbing. It’s a highly subjective question but is there any greater sin than to hate?

Perhaps the wording is a bit disturbing, (certainly on review my spelling was).
Yes I’m refering to objects fro teh most part, but in relation to overcoming sin, I’m speaking of the evils that are behind the tempations.
As to the sin of hate, should we not hate evil?

Jesus said that the only sin that won’t be forgiven is to balspheme the the Holy Spirit, so perhaps there is indeed a greater sin than hate.

Also I would disagree with it taking time to overcome. It’s a matter of truly using the free will that God gave us. I smoked for several years until I decided it was time to stop. I threw away what was left of the pack that I had and have not smoked since. It’s merely a matter of having resolve in your decision. Yes I made it sound easy… because it is.

I applaud you on your decision and your resolve, but I don’t think that your experience is typical. Many people who try what you did, fail at least once before succeeding.
With food it is a whole different matter.

However you are right in saying that resolve is the crucial factor. In the case of quitting smoking you can almost tell the resolve is not there when they say, "I’m going to quit after this pack, instead of tossing them immediately as you did.
In addition, your (initial) resolve did not prevent the cravings and the need to persevere in your resolve until the cravings abated.

Of course cigarettes are just one habit that requires resolve and fortitude. Perhaps worse is dieting. With cigarettes one gives them up altogether. With food, more is involved. We can’t give up “food”, we have to give up “certain foods” and we can’t give up “eating”, we have to give us certain eating habits.
These things are not easy for the majority of people but require, resolve and perseverance. The same is true of sin. overcoming habitual sin requires resolve and perseverance. This is why Paul mentions perseverance and running the race and figting the good fight.

Peace
James

 

[NeedImprovement]

Sometimes our theology is reduced to, Hate the sin, but love the sinner… nothing wrong there.

And just to confirm, Satan and his minions are not on our “Do not Hate” list. Our Blessed Lord Himself says **the devil is a liar and a murderer from the beginning **[John 8:44]. In Genesis [3:15] God tells the devil,“I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers…”

We can have all the resolve in the world, but to overcome sin God’s grace is more necessary. We need to put in the effort, to try to keep fighting the good fight , to try and get up when we fall, but without God’s grace none of it would be possible.

 

[Tsuwano]

Sometimes our theology is reduced to, Hate the sin, but love the sinner… nothing wrong there.

And just to confirm, Satan and his minions are not on our “Do not Hate” list. Our Blessed Lord Himself says **the devil is a liar and a murderer from the beginning **[John 8:44]. In Genesis [3:15] God tells the devil,“I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers…”

We can have all the resolve in the world, but to overcome sin God’s grace is more necessary. We need to put in the effort, to try to keep fighting the good fight , to try and get up when we fall, but without God’s grace none of it would be possible.

Indeed! Without God’s grace we wouldn’t even have the desire to get up.