What if my body demands it?

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SinfulMan

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I thank all of you who have responded to my previous question, especially those who helped me understand Hebrews 10:26-31 better.

I have another problem. I was told that it (masturbation) all begins in the mind but in my case I think it begins with my body. I mean, sometimes my body just doesn’t co-operate with my mind. It is as though my body demands it from me (since I’ve been doing it so regularly for so many years) as though it needs it on a regular basis. It’s similar to a drug addiction. Sometimes I am not even thinking any evil thoughts but my body begins to behave differently and then automatically I begin to think bad thoughts. How should I cope with that?
 
You can’t always control your thoughts or feelings - but neither do you need to mindlessly act on them simply because you have them. If your sainted grandmother was in the room with you when you were having these ‘thoughts’ I’d cheerfully bet millions that you’d somehow manage to control yourself and not act on them.

As for your body ‘demanding’ anything - has to be the strangest way of phrasing it I’ve ever heard! Even IF your body were fully a separate and distinct person or entity from your mind, which it isn’t, it still wouldn’t be in a position to ‘demand’ anything of you, any more than your child would be.

Your mind is in control of your body. That’s what separates us from the other animals. If it weren’t then literally no-one would ever be monogamous or chaste. Since people CAN be, then so can you.
 
You can’t do it alone either. Life is a journey where we have to try and fit ourselves for Heaven, remake ourselves for God, so that we are fit for the Kingdom of Heaven. I have found very real assistance through the sacraments, confession and the Eucharist.

Meeting God in the Sacraments provides an invaluable proximity to Him. I want to be His child and so benefit from the contact I have with Him in the Sacraments to the point where I am better able to be in charge of what I am mindful of.
 
As soon as your body ‘begins to act differently’ as you say, pray! Go do something else. If you’re lying in bed, stand up, if you’re standing in the shower, turn it to cold, if you’re watching TV, turn it off.

Most important piece of advice I can give - you won’t overcome your sins by thinking about them. Do something else, if you know certain times or places make you likely to do this, don’t go to those places, instead go to adoration, or help out at your local soup kitchen, or take an evening course. Something constructive. Eventually, doing good things for God will make the bad things you used to enjoy seem less and less attractive.

And please, pray for me, because I also struggle with temptations to sexual sins.
 
This is a very tough habit/behavior to break, but it can be done. I’ve struggled with this myself. You have a good start in that you recognize when you feel tempted, and you want to make the changes in your life.

Now when the time comes around, as others have said, redirect your mind to another activity, a shower, a bike ride, reading, anything to get your mind off of what’s arousing it. Ask that the Blessed Mother or one of the saints intercede for you and guide you through your tough times. Pray that God and the angels protect you, and that you may continue to see Satan’s traps, and avoid them.

And from my experience, this seems like it’s going to be extremely tough to do, but you can do it. And once you’ve done it for a few days and a few weeks, it won’t seem so tough (there will be temptations, but as you train your mind and body they will get better in line with what God wants from you and me.)
 
SinfulMan said:
How should I cope with that?
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My method that must work.

Say or sing or shout:

(LOOP)

OMNE ANIMAL POST SPANCUM TRISTE
TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL POST SPANCUM
SPANCUM TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL POST
POST SPANCUM TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL

(TILL LUST IS GONE)

Or, if it helps not, say so:

(LOOP)

OMNE ANIMAL POST SPANCUM TRISTE EST
TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL POST SPANCUM EST
SPANCUM TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL POST EST
POST SPANCUM TRISTE OMNE ANIMAL EST

(TILL LUST IS GONE)

This must help.

Dopamin - Y
Prolactin - N
 
Such is the nature of addiction. It will be hard at first, but with time it gets easier. The less you do it, the less your will feel these impulses. In the mean time, pray!
 
hello again,
well, the thing is, you’re body and your feelings should really have no say in the matter, you need to work at mortifying your senses, so you make your decisions based on intelligence and not what you’re feeling.
although sins of the flesh are usually the hardest to overcome, but like i said before, with a lot of prayer and penance, you can do anything,

the thing about giving in to your desires and feelings, like anger, lust, sloth, or anything else, is that you are letting yourself be a slave to something that has no benefit to you, and is hurting you and God very much,
when we mortify ourselves we have to surrender our will completely to God, because only He knows what’s really good for us and what will get us to heaven, to give in to any other will; our own, the worlds, the devil, will only lead away from God, and the longer you follow your own will, the further from God you will grow,
of course you need to be able to tell the difference between Gods will and your own or the worlds or the devil,
but once you do surrender your will completely to God, then your will and His will be one in the same, because it *will *be your will to do His will,

that book i showed you - “my daily bread” explains mortification very well,
and here’s a helpful page with some recommended mortifications -
catholicapologetics.info/catholicteaching/virtue/vpenence.htm#Recommended
but before you go getting into it, it would be good to talk to your priest about it first, because i know there can be alot of confusion about it(at least for me there was)

another things is, if these things happen to you while you’re just sitting around doing nothing in particular, then don’t do that anymore,
take up a hobby to fill your time with, for example, i took up juggling,
just whatever you want,
and if you need a rest but you’re afraid you’ll fall into “it” again, then find someone to be with while you’re resting…i dunno if you live alone or not though…

ok and lastly, i don’t know if you read or watch Bishop Fulton J. Sheens stuff, but i find him to be very easy to understand and very informational…and funny alot of the time to :3
bishopsheen.com/store.asp?pid=13239&catid=19766
he has books, videos, and i think some of his videos you can watch for free on youtube.

k i’ll be praying for you, tc bye bye.
 
OP, your body “demands” it? That’s a little strong.

I don’t know of anyone who has ever died (or even gone through withdrawal, like drug addicts do) from lack of ejaculation.

DaveBj
 
DaveBj said:
OP, your body “demands” it? That’s a little strong.

I don’t know of anyone who has ever died (or even gone through withdrawal, like drug addicts do) from lack of ejaculation.

DaveBj
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Then you don’t know many people who have done this for years and years and years and try and quit cold turkey. No one will die, but there are withdrawal symptons (all psychological, not physical)
 
DaveBj said:
OP, your body “demands” it? That’s a little strong.

I don’t know of anyone who has ever died (or even gone through withdrawal, like drug addicts do) from lack of ejaculation.

DaveBj
Click to expand...
I don’t know how to explain it to you, but just keep me in your prayers. My body has become so used to regular masturbation that it begins to “behave differently” whenever I try to stop completely. And when I fall after that effort, it has an effect which is even more demoralizing. So sometimes I feel I just have to resign myself to the fact that my body wants it and I can’t delay it much longer (for it will eventually happen). How to get out of this mess?
 
SinfulMan said:
I don’t know how to explain it to you, but just keep me in your prayers. My body has become so used to regular masturbation that it begins to “behave differently” whenever I try to stop completely. And when I fall after that effort, it has an effect which is even more demoralizing. So sometimes I feel I just have to resign myself to the fact that my body wants it and I can’t delay it much longer (for it will eventually happen). How to get out of this mess?
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The way out of this mess is firstly to recognise these ‘feelings’ for what they are - feelings and NOT facts, and NOT reality. Tell yourself this every single time you catch yourself thinking or speaking of masturbation as if it were a foregone conclusion which you can’t avoid, because it isn’t and you can.

In fact fill your days with as many useful (preferably holy, or at least distracting) things to do and think about as you can, and think about masturbation as seldom as possible.

It is truly your mind that wants these things, although possibly on a subconscious rather than conscious level. But don’t for a second think that even that puts it beyond your ability to avoid it.

Again, it is not your body. Your body, of course, can do without sex and masturbation indefinitely. Many people, especially the saints, have lived without such either for years at a time or permanently, which gives the lie to the notion that it’s a necessity or ever unavoidable.

Your second way out of the mess - follow the recommendations others have made to you. These are people who, like myself, know from firsthand experience what helps and what ultimately works. Frequent confession, Mass and the Eucharist as often as possible. Pray often for purity (as much as possible every day, not just at those times when you are tempted) and above all avoid as much as possible any tv shows, music, movies or whatever might be an occasion of sin for you.

Resign yourself to the fact that it will be a struggle, for at least a while - but few if any things that are worth doing are easy, and if you keep struggling, with God’s help you will succeed. If St Augustine, who led a wicked life up until the age of 40, was able to stop then so will you.
 
try reading this from the Haydock Commentary

Ver. 26. If we sin wilfully. He speaks of the sin of wilful apostacy from the known truth; after which, as we cannot be baptized again, we cannot expect to have that abundant remission of sins, which Christ purchased by his death, applied to our souls in that ample manner as it is in baptism; but we have rather all manner of reason to look for a dreadful judgment; the more, because apostates from the know truth seldom or never have the grace to return to it. (Challoner)

Ver. 28-29. A man making void, &c. He brings this comparison from the manner that transgressors were dealt with under the law of Moses, to shew how much greater punishments Christians deserve when they are ungrateful to Christ after much greater benefits, when they may be said to have trodden under foot the Son of God by despising him, who was the author of their salvation, by shedding his blood upon the cross. (Witham) — What is here said of the crime of apostacy, may in some measure be applied to every deadly sin committed after baptism or the sacrament of penance; for a Christian by returning to sin, treads under foot the Son of God, despises the adorable blood by which he was sanctified, and offers a henious affront to the spirit of grace. Apostacy, though enormous, like all other sins can be forgiven by true repentance; but the apostle declares, there is no victim for the guilt of a person who perseveres and dies in apostacy.

Ver. 31. Man is mortal, and therefore cannot extend his vengeance beyond death; God is immortal, and, as he lives eternally, can punish eternally; and he who during life despises a God who died for him, will at death experience the rigour of a God always living to punish him.
 
SinfulMan said:
Ok. I’ll try.
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Try? “Do, or do not. There is no ‘try.’” - Yoda.

Sorry, had to get that quote in there 😃

Above all take it one day at a time. Start off by resolving to keep yourself pure for the rest of today. Then resolve to make it a whole day. Then two whole days, then three … you see where I’m heading.

If you slip up, resolve to keep yourself pure for at least a day longer than you managed last time … then a day longer than that … and so on.
 
ForwardProgress said:
Then you don’t know many people who have done this for years and years and years and try and quit cold turkey. No one will die, but there are withdrawal symptons (all psychological, not physical)
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The OP’s reference was as if to a physical addiction. Your reference is to a psychological addiction. These are two entirely different things. The addiction to sexual arousal and orgasm is psychological, not physical, and yes, I will grant that it can be just as strong. However, it can be overcome.

OP, you have already been given some good advice. Work on it one day at a time. When you fail, come back for forgiveness and absolution; your failure (or anyone else’s) is not a surprise to God and will not knock Him off His throne. Yes, there is light at the end of the tunnel, and no, it is not a train.

DaveBj
 
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