What if your doctor insists on birth control before treatment?

[HOPEFUL_IN_UK]

I have asked this on Ask An Apologist, but I haven’t seen it come up.

I have an infectious, chronic illness that could kill me. There is a treatment that has an 80% chance of curing me. It’s a form of chemotherapy using strong drugs with harsh side effects. The treatment lasts for six months. For obvious reasons, it would be a very bad thing to get pregnant while on the treatment or for six months after ending treatment.

The doctor says that the NHS requires patients to use two kinds of birth control before receiving this treatment. My husband and I use NFP. I know that the doctor does not respect Catholic beliefs based on something she said about my husband “refusing to protect himself.”

I told her that we would just abstain for the year. I’m not sure she really buys it. To be honest, we really would abstain. We would honestly not be “open to life” in such a situation. Even the small risk of pregnancy with NFP would be more than we could tolerate. And, the treatment effects menstrual cycles and so could make it harder to do NFP.

She wants to know what TWO forms of birth control we promise to use. “Abstain” and “NFP” do not count. The requirement is to demonstrate that we are ready, willing, and able to employ two forms of artificial birth control.

What should we do?

Could I agree to take a prescription for birth control pills (not actually bothering to take the pills, of course) and promise that we won’t have sex without a condom? Would that be deceitful? Would it give the doctor the impression that silly Catholic dogma naturally takes a back seat in the face of medical science?

 

[Tietjen]

I have asked this on Ask An Apologist, but I haven’t seen it come up.

I have an infectious, chronic illness that could kill me. There is a treatment that has an 80% chance of curing me. It’s a form of chemotherapy using strong drugs with harsh side effects. The treatment lasts for six months. For obvious reasons, it would be a very bad thing to get pregnant while on the treatment or for six months after ending treatment.

The doctor says that the NHS requires patients to use two kinds of birth control before receiving this treatment. My husband and I use NFP. I know that the doctor does not respect Catholic beliefs based on something she said about my husband “refusing to protect himself.”

I told her that we would just abstain for the year. I’m not sure she really buys it. To be honest, we really would abstain. We would honestly not be “open to life” in such a situation. Even the small risk of pregnancy with NFP would be more than we could tolerate. And, the treatment effects menstrual cycles and so could make it harder to do NFP.

She wants to know what TWO forms of birth control we promise to use. “Abstain” and “NFP” do not count. The requirement is to demonstrate that we are ready, willing, and able to employ two forms of artificial birth control.

What should we do?

Could I agree to take a prescription for birth control pills (not actually bothering to take the pills, of course) and promise that we won’t have sex without a condom? Would that be deceitful? Would it give the doctor the impression that silly Catholic dogma naturally takes a back seat in the face of medical science?

I am sorry to hear your doctor is being so stubborn about this. Is she absolutely refusing to treat your condition if you refuse to use artificial birth control? If so, would it be possible to find another doctor (A Catholic) who would be willing to treat you? If not, would the possibility of using a lawsuit to gain treatment be all right with you and your husband. The way I figure it, if pro-abortion people can sue a Catholic hospital in order to acquire an abortion, there certainly should be some legal recourse for you to sue in order to be treated. If you can convince the court that you are being denied medical treatment due to your religious beliefs. Perhaps I’m naive though. It’s pretty sad if the option left to you is to lie in order to be treated. Of course, if that were the only option, then I would probably do that rather than continue living with a chronic illness. God bless you. I’ll keep you and your husband in my prayers.

 

[1ke]

I’d try to find a doctor who would not require this, but you may not be able to. If you don’t want to force a legal issue-- and I don’t know what the laws are in the UK-- then I’d probably say “if we have sex we will use X and Y”.

Since you aren’t going to have sex, it’s not a lie. “if” means just that… if.

 

[Ron_Conte]

If you are abstaining from all sexual intercourse, then it would not be immoral to take birth control pills as part of a medical treatment. But it seems that this doctor is not prescribing the pills as part of treatment. Perhaps you should get a second opinion from a Catholic physician. In cases involving any serious illness, it is generally a good idea to get a second opinion anyway.

If all other options fail, you could use mental reservation. For example: you could agree to take the birth control pills (while abstaining, which would not be immoral). And you could state that if you and your husband have sexual relations during treatment, he will use a condom (knowing that this will not occur).

Use of mental reservation for a grave reason is not immoral.

 

[apricot_yogurt]

Find another doctor. Contact SPUC or Life or The Guild Of Catholic Doctors to see if they can help.

 

[HOPEFUL_IN_UK]

Find another doctor. Contact SPUC or Life or The Guild Of Catholic Doctors to see if they can help.

That’s not an option for us. We’re in the UK. This is the NHS.

I’m considering just doing the lying thing. Saying, “OK. If you write me a prescription for the Pill, that will be fine. And, we promise to use condoms if we have sex, as well.” I’m just not sure that that is OK. It’s not an explicit lie, but it is sorta deceptive. And, it will tell the doctor that Catholics will use birth control for “good reasons.”

 

[rwoehmke]

That’s not an option for us. We’re in the UK. This is the NHS.

I’m considering just doing the lying thing. Saying, “OK. If you write me a prescription for the Pill, that will be fine. And, we promise to use condoms if we have sex, as well.” I’m just not sure that that is OK. It’s not an explicit lie, but it is sorta deceptive. And, it will tell the doctor that Catholics will use birth control for “good reasons.”

Under these circumstances I believe that following this course of action even taking the pills (assuming you are abstaining) should not be a problem. Unless you would be taking them to avoid getting pregnant, taking the pills would be an indifferent action.As far as giving scandal to that doctor, he isn’t going to think any better of Catholics in any case. He most likely wouldn’t even notice. Since you are not currently pregnant, taking the potent chemo treatments will not harm any unborn child. That situation would entail a really difficult decision.

 

[Ruthie]

Some folks seem to be missing the point. The purpose for which the doctor is prescribing the two ABC methods is to prevent pregnancy, period. Because of the chemo, there is a very high risk of damage to the baby growing in the womb. No pregnancy, no damage. Even if Hopeful is abstaining, taking the Pill would still be a mortal sin.

Hopeful, First try asking the doctor if writing the prescription is enough to meet the the requirements on her, even knowing that you have no intention of taking them. If that doesn’t work, ask her if there is a waiver you can sign. If the answer is no, then check with her boss and/or the NHS bureaucracy to see if this is an absolute requirement. (Your doctor may be wrong.) If it is, ask them if they realize that they are denying you treatment based on your religion. If they still insist, go to your MP. Last but not least, go to the newspapers. Bureaucracies hate bad publicity.

I’m not so sure there’s no out for religious beliefs. From what I understand, the UK is big on tolerance. Ask the doctor what she would do if you were a Muslim!

Good luck - you’re in my prayers.

 

[BlaineTog]

If you’re abstaining from sex, then you could take all the contraceptives and abortifacts in the world and it wouldn’t be a sin. The Pill isn’t sinful; what it does to the sex act is. No sex = no sin. By all means, make it clear to the doctor that you’re going to abstain and that you’re only taking the pill because she’s forcing you to, but as long as you don’t intentionally mislead her, that’s all you have to worry about.

 

[rwoehmke]

No, the point is that it is the doctor that wants the pills to be taken to prevent pregnancy, not Hopeful_in_UK. Hopeful has no intention of taking any risk. Even pills sometimes fail and abstinence is 100 percent effective. The pill is legitimately taken for other medical problems as long as the intent of the taker is not to prevent pregnancy. When you deal with a smart-*** doctor, you can’t tell them anything and he is typical of some. If Hopeful is abstinent there is no way in h–l that those pills, even if taken will prevent a pregnancy, unless you believe in human parthogenisis.

 

[1ke]

Some folks seem to be missing the point. The purpose for which the doctor is prescribing the two ABC methods is to prevent pregnancy, period. Because of the chemo, there is a very high risk of damage to the baby growing in the womb. No pregnancy, no damage.

No, we have not missed the point at all.

Even if Hopeful is abstaining, taking the Pill would still be a mortal sin.

Which mortal sin would it be?

 

[Kielbasi]

That’s not an option for us. We’re in the UK. This is the NHS.

I’m considering just doing the lying thing. Saying, “OK. If you write me a prescription for the Pill, that will be fine. And, we promise to use condoms if we have sex, as well.” I’m just not sure that that is OK. It’s not an explicit lie, but it is sorta deceptive. And, it will tell the doctor that Catholics will use birth control for “good reasons.”

Please don’t tell that lie. Birth control pills are very powerful hormones. If the doctor assumes you are taking them, she might change your treatment regimen in some way which would be inappropriate if you ain’t taking them.

 

[HOPEFUL_IN_UK]

Please don’t tell that lie. Birth control pills are very powerful hormones. If the doctor assumes you are taking them, she might change your treatment regimen in some way which would be inappropriate if you ain’t taking them.

No, it wouldn’t affect the treatment. The dosage and the drugs are what they are.

But! The Apologists have answered my question and, while they refer me elsewhere for advice, they’ve also made it pretty clear that I am not to lie, in any way shape or form. To say, “OK, write me a prescription for the Pill” or “OK, we won’t have sex without a condom” seems to be a lie because it deceives.

The doctor must know that we are going to be faithful to our Catholic beliefs. I must make it very clear that we cannot and we will not use artificial birth control for any reason. We will abstain from sex because we don’t want to risk pregnancy. But, that is all we can do.

If treatment is refused, then we will go from there.

Things move slowly in the NHS - I have an appointment in July. I will tell her then and then we’ll see what happens. I’d love to start treatment, ASAP, but if they refuse and I have to go through an appeals process, this could take a long time.

The British government is very hostile to Catholics. There has been a recent fight over the Labour party forcing Catholic MP’s to vote for embryo research (they can kick you out of government for failing to vote with the party line.) And, there is another fight where Parliament wants to force Catholic schools to teach that homosexuality, etc, are OK.

 

[CuriousInIL]

I would check with NHS directly. I know that in the US, for drugs of the type that you are referencing, the health authorities generally require 2 forms of ABC but there is a lesser know “exception” for abstaining with a written contract promising such.

 

[JRKH]

**If you are abstaining from all sexual intercourse, then it would not be immoral to take birth control pills as part of a medical treatment. **But it seems that this doctor is not prescribing the pills as part of treatment. Perhaps you should get a second opinion from a Catholic physician. In cases involving any serious illness, it is generally a good idea to get a second opinion anyway.

If all other options fail, you could use mental reservation. For example: you could agree to take the birth control pills (while abstaining, which would not be immoral). And you could state that if you and your husband have sexual relations during treatment, he will use a condom (knowing that this will not occur).

Use of mental reservation for a grave reason is not immoral.

I believe that this is the most wise and simplest course of action since you say that a second opinion is not an option.
The option of threatening litigation would be too stressful, would cause delay - possibly fatal, and harm your relationship with the doctor.
Have you discussed this with your preist or councilor/confessor?

Peace
James

 

[graceandglory]

JRKH:
I don’t think you are going to get a good answer in this thread. I would ask it to the CA Apologist.

It seems like it would fall under the “I had a vasectomy, now I’m Catholic, can I still have marital relations with my wife?” category.

But, I am not an apologist, and neither is anyone here, we are just doing our best. I would go to the source.

Praying for you and your upcoming medical procedures.

 

[daeve]

You know, I think you should talk to your own priest. I read the answer on Ask an Apologist before seeing this, and I don’t know what to think.

My personal thoughts are that you should accept the prescription and tell them that if you have sex you will use the condoms. You don’t intend to take the pills or have sex, so I think you’re ok. But who am I? What do I know? What do any of us really know?

You need an expert in the UK who understands the ins and outs of your health care system. Here in the US, it’s so different, that I’m not sure we can appreciate your circumstances. Please talk to your priest, or call the diocese. That would probably be the best option…the diocese or archdiocese will surely have encountered this situation before and have an answer for you.

I’ll be thinking about and praying for you to resolve not only this dilemma but the condition that’s causing it too. Bless you both.

 

[Spirithound]

The doctor says that the NHS requires patients to use two kinds of birth control before receiving this treatment.

I told her that we would just abstain for the year.

She wants to know what TWO forms of birth control we promise to use. “Abstain” and “NFP” do not count. The requirement is to demonstrate that we are ready, willing, and able to employ two forms of artificial birth control.

Hopeful, if you remain abstinent, then it would be morally permissible to accept a prescription for the pill, and even take it if necessary, since there is absolutely no chance that you and your abstinent husband will become parents this year. Since they require 2 forms, I would suggest buying the smallest box of condoms you can find and let them rot in your nightstand.
God bless!

 

[BlaineTog]

Since they require 2 forms, I would suggest buying the smallest box of condoms you can find and let them rot in your nightstand.

Hey, as long as you don’t cause a scandal, there’s nothing wrong with using them for a water balloon fight.

Just sayin’…

 

[kalt]

No, it wouldn’t affect the treatment. The dosage and the drugs are what they are.

But! The Apologists have answered my question and, while they refer me elsewhere for advice, they’ve also made it pretty clear that I am not to lie, in any way shape or form. To say, “OK, write me a prescription for the Pill” or “OK, we won’t have sex without a condom” seems to be a lie because it deceives.

The doctor must know that we are going to be faithful to our Catholic beliefs. I must make it very clear that we cannot and we will not use artificial birth control for any reason. We will abstain from sex because we don’t want to risk pregnancy. But, that is all we can do.

If treatment is refused, then we will go from there.

Things move slowly in the NHS - I have an appointment in July. I will tell her then and then we’ll see what happens. I’d love to start treatment, ASAP, but if they refuse and I have to go through an appeals process, this could take a long time.

The British government is very hostile to Catholics. There has been a recent fight over the Labour party forcing Catholic MP’s to vote for embryo research (they can kick you out of government for failing to vote with the party line.) And, there is another fight where Parliament wants to force Catholic schools to teach that homosexuality, etc, are OK.

When she asks you which two birth control methods you will use, answer, “Twin beds.”