What is my Calling?

[JillianRose]

Hello Guys!!

I have a question. I read the Catechism and continuously read my Bible. I am married women with two small kids. I feel a really strong calling to do more of Gods works, beside fund raisers and school functions. I really think I could so ministering. Am I wrong? Can there be anything like that, that could fill my calling at the Church? Please help.

 

[HolyHandGrenade]

Join a 3rd Order!

 

[wild_thing]

There are a lot of roles you can fill in the Church- if you are not any of these things already. There are lectors, Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion, Sacristans, Catechists, Befrienders, etc. Call up your pastor and talk with him! See if there is a role at your church that needs someone. Your priest should be able to help you in expanding your spiritual and corporal works of mercy.

 

[mfdc]

You could blog about the catholic faith You can bring christ to your non catholic friends

 

[I_love_rocks]

Yes, and in addition to the traditional roles of EM, Lector, etc. I’ve found that if your church has a bereavement ministry, prayer chain ministry, Catholic bible study, hospitality ministry, collection counter, greeter, music ministry… and if you are called to it / anointed for it, it will tug you. I tried a couple of things. Some worked out great, one really wasn’t a good fit. I could just tell. And I don’t want to forget to mention the church usually has a definite need for faithful, dependable, trained Catechists. THe Holy Spirit can give you very clear direction and discernment.

 

[Cat]

Consider the “seasons” of your life.

Right now, you have two small children. This season of your life is “Mommy.” Your “calling” right now in your life season is to raise your children and train them up in the Catholic faith. Teach them to love Jesus. Teach them to listen for God’s calling to vocations and be open to His leading.

You can still do other work for God. I love the idea that someone suggested of blogging. There are other online ministries, too.

Or pray–that is valuable work that even a busy Mommy can do.

Or perhaps you could join your parish choir, or get involved in your parish in some other activity. Ask your pastor what needs to be done, and see if you can find something to do that still allows you to fulfil your calling of raising children.

As all of us with children discover, the season of “Mommy” is much too short. You will eventually move into a different season. When your children go to school (assuming that you don’t homeschool), you will be in “Mom” season, a time when your children still need you, but are more independent. “Mom” season gives you more time to do other things not directly associated with raising children.

So that would be the time to begin working in a different “calling.” Others here are suggesting that perhaps you could work in your parish as a catechist. That would be awesome. Or perhaps you’ll get interested in becoming one of the youth group sponsors. Or maybe you’ll get involved with a ministry to the poor.

When your children grow up and leave the house, you’ll move into another season. It can be a sad season, but if you are looking to do work for the Lord, you’ll fill the empty days with tasks that God has called you to do. It will be a busy season, as you’ll still be young and hopefully healthy. During these years, you will probably move through different seasons and get involved in several different ministries in the Church. You’ll also be in a season during which you re-learn to love your spouse not as a “daddy” or a “dad,” but as a man. (This is a glorious season, when there are no children around to interrupt you and your husband during loving moments, picnics, projects, and sleep!)

And finally, you will move into your Senior season, and at that point, you will either continue whatever work you have been doing, or you’ll add more work, or perhaps you will begin to cut back on your work in the Church so that you can take care of your health and that of your spouse. And of course, you will hopefully move into “Grandma” season! Or perhaps you will move into “Mother of a Grown Child in a Vocation” season…

What you need to keep in mind throughout your life is that you CAN’T move early into a season. You need to live in the season that you are in. You can’t jump ahead. When you have small children, you need to be Mommy. You can’t move forward into your middle-aged, childless season. Some people try to do this, and they learn, to their sorrow, that in trying to jump ahead of their lives, they end up losing something, often their children. You have to wait on the Lord and do the work that He gives you for each season, not constantly be longing for the NEXT season.

I hope this all makes sense and is helpful to you.

 

[laszlo]

I you have boy(s), rise them/him to be priests. There is no greater ministry.

 

[HolyHandGrenade]

I you have boy(s), rise them/him to be priests. There is no greater ministry.

The Priesthood is a calling as is the same with all vocations. If you have boys then raise them to be faithful to God and teach them to respect the dignity each vocation holds within His Catholic Church. Parents pushing vocations on their children has done a lot of damage to our Church. Like trying to force a circular block into a square hole…not a good fit.

 

[InspiritCarol]

Hello Guys!!

I have a question. I read the Catechism and continuously read my Bible. I am married women with two small kids. I feel a really strong calling to do more of Gods works, beside fund raisers and school functions. I really think I could so ministering. Am I wrong? Can there be anything like that, that could fill my calling at the Church? Please help.

Oh my goodness, even if there isn’t any pre-fab “role” that is waiting for you at your church, there *absolutely *is one waiting for you to “find”. Just start by getting involved, you’d be amazed. Be sure not to take on everything; people have tons of ideas and little time so you will find yourself quickly overwhelmed with busy work that is not necessarily “God’s” work if you’re not VERY discriminating. Be persistent in seeking what you feel God is calling you to do. There are infinite ways that we as women have to “minister”; especially as mothers of young children.

Can you be more specific? What are you gifts? What are your loves?
There are larger groupings to consider:
-Evangelization
-Youth
-Homebound
-Charitable Outreach
…
The list is almost endless…

What are your passions? What drives you? What do you see as a real need in your community? This is likely where God is “calling” you.

Listen to Him and don’t be afraid to lead the way if there is no path there yet. Don’t be afraid to step into a well established role and make it your own either.

 

[laszlo]

The Priesthood is a calling as is the same with all vocations. If you have boys then raise them to be faithful to God and teach them to respect the dignity each vocation holds within His Catholic Church. Parents pushing vocations on their children has done a lot of damage to our Church. Like trying to force a circular block into a square hole…not a good fit.

Would you so kind to illustrate with dta your thesis.

Theologically the vocation is the call of the bishop before the ordination. I agree that parents pushing at this point (which in the past happened many times influencing the bishops or even the pope) was damaging for the Church; but today this is very

Simply orienting their children toward the priesthood seems to be beneficial.

here is the CARA Report for 2011 ordination

usccb.org/vocations/classof2011/ordination-class-2011-report.pdf

39% attended Catholic High school and College;

89% was encouraged toward the priesthood, 47 % by his mother.

Naturally I am ready to learn. **Please show us your data **about the damages caused by parental orientation toward the priesthood.

 

[InspiritCarol]

You can still do other work for God. I love the idea that someone suggested of blogging.

Excellent response, overall Cat.

The only problem with blogging, as opposed to other service oriented activities, is that your little children are not able to process what you are doing, and so it is a very selfish activity as a mommy of little ones.

 

[JReducation]

I you have boy(s), rise them/him to be priests. There is no greater ministry.

Please don’t suggest that. Some people will read this and take you literally. Then, if this does happen that a parent pushes their son toward the seminary and the young man is denied admission, there are all kinds of problems.

You raise children to be good holy Catholic men and women. If they are, they will respond to God’s call, where ever that may lead them.

Let me share a little story about a friar whom I knew a long time ago. His parents raised him to be a priest. He was attracted to religious life, not to the priesthood. He entered one of the Franciscan obediences (for privacy reasons, which one is not important).

He went through seven years of formation to be a friar and made solemn vows. He then went to two years of formation to be a priest, asked his superior for permission to be ordained. The permission was granted. He was ordained. He was miserable.

He finally asked his superior to be dispensed. When they looked at his request, they realized that he had a vocation to be a religious, but not to be a priest. Long story short, after 10 years of misery, he has now spent 15 years of bliss as a friar who teaches and serves as the parish maintenance man. He never has to say mass or celebrate sacraments unless he wants to or unless there is an emergency.

The same thing happens with women. I’ve known women who were raised to be nuns, because the parents have no clue what nun is. I knew one who was the most horrid teacher. She was a lovely woman, but couldn’t teach. Eventually, she realized her parents’ mistake. Their idea of a nun was Mother Teresa and sisters who are in active ministry. This girl never learned to teach, because she was not into it. She eventually became a real nun. She left the Franciscan Sisters and joined the Poor Clares. She’s very happy.

Do we have a shortage of priests? Yes we do. Do we have a shortage of sisters? Yes we do. Do we have a shortage of brothers? Yes we do.

Should we steer our young in those directions. No we should not. We must steer them to listen to the voice of Christ and to respond with generosity. We should expose them to the different gifts: deacons, priests, brothers, monks, friars, hermits, husbands and fathers or for women: sisters, nuns, hermits, consecrated virgins, wives and mothers . . . for both, good single Catholics.

If they are open to the Spirit, they will hear his voice and respond in love.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[heart4home]

Consider the “seasons” of your life.

Right now, you have two small children. This season of your life is “Mommy.” Your “calling” right now in your life season is to raise your children and train them up in the Catholic faith. Teach them to love Jesus. Teach them to listen for God’s calling to vocations and be open to His leading.

You can still do other work for God. I love the idea that someone suggested of blogging. There are other online ministries, too.

Or pray–that is valuable work that even a busy Mommy can do.

Or perhaps you could join your parish choir, or get involved in your parish in some other activity. Ask your pastor what needs to be done, and see if you can find something to do that still allows you to fulfil your calling of raising children.

As all of us with children discover, the season of “Mommy” is much too short. You will eventually move into a different season. When your children go to school (assuming that you don’t homeschool), you will be in “Mom” season, a time when your children still need you, but are more independent. “Mom” season gives you more time to do other things not directly associated with raising children.

So that would be the time to begin working in a different “calling.” Others here are suggesting that perhaps you could work in your parish as a catechist. That would be awesome. Or perhaps you’ll get interested in becoming one of the youth group sponsors. Or maybe you’ll get involved with a ministry to the poor.

When your children grow up and leave the house, you’ll move into another season. It can be a sad season, but if you are looking to do work for the Lord, you’ll fill the empty days with tasks that God has called you to do. It will be a busy season, as you’ll still be young and hopefully healthy. During these years, you will probably move through different seasons and get involved in several different ministries in the Church. You’ll also be in a season during which you re-learn to love your spouse not as a “daddy” or a “dad,” but as a man. (This is a glorious season, when there are no children around to interrupt you and your husband during loving moments, picnics, projects, and sleep!)

And finally, you will move into your Senior season, and at that point, you will either continue whatever work you have been doing, or you’ll add more work, or perhaps you will begin to cut back on your work in the Church so that you can take care of your health and that of your spouse. And of course, you will hopefully move into “Grandma” season! Or perhaps you will move into “Mother of a Grown Child in a Vocation” season…

What you need to keep in mind throughout your life is that you CAN’T move early into a season. You need to live in the season that you are in. You can’t jump ahead. When you have small children, you need to be Mommy. You can’t move forward into your middle-aged, childless season. Some people try to do this, and they learn, to their sorrow, that in trying to jump ahead of their lives, they end up losing something, often their children. You have to wait on the Lord and do the work that He gives you for each season, not constantly be longing for the NEXT season.

I hope this all makes sense and is helpful to you.

with just a disclaimer that with a helpful dad you may be able to take on a small project that gets you out of the home, and with some other moms etc. for a bit of a breather, but overall, this is right on the money.

The seasons of little ones go so fast, even for those of us who have large families, so we thought it would last forever.

If you make your first priority those little ones and your husband, you’ll be serving God in the greatest way you can.

 

[InspiritCarol]

with just a disclaimer that with a helpful dad you may be able to take on a small project that gets you out of the home, and with some other moms etc. for a bit of a breather, but overall, this is right on the money.

The seasons of little ones go so fast, even for those of us who have large families, so we thought it would last forever.

If you make your first priority those little ones and your husband, you’ll be serving God in the greatest way you can.

I think it’s important here to clarify what we intend with our priorities.

First and foremost is God. - we serve God best by being there for our families as the best parents we can. We MODEL God for them by serving others.

I’m afraid that our society has made us think that to be ideal parents, we have to see to it that our kids are in all kinds of secular activities like sports, etc. thereby neglecting church and our community in the process.

If we, as mothers are able to find service oriented projects wherein we can involve our children (if we can’t we simply aren’t looking); then we have
-kept God first
AND
-kept our children/family’s best interest first also
AND
-shown them how to find Christ - (be it as a priest or however they are called)
AND (here’s the best part)

• WE feel fulfilled and special too because we have fully fulfilled our vocations for God.

Now, I only have three in diapers and one on the way while being caregiver to my mother, so I imagine a time when I will need to cut back on my church vocations (yes - that is plural); but I’m afraid that society has gone overboard to make mothers feel like their children are supposed to be “busy” at all times in convenient secular activities that do nothing to help them find themselves spiritually. To me, this is the greatest disservice we can do for our children. I admit I am “young” as a mother in that my children are young; but I have had the benefit of wiser council.

I do not mind if anyone wants to censure me on this; so I will say it again more plainly: being a good mother MUST involve charitible activities within the community preferably through church but always for the glory of God; never to the detriment of our children.

 

[JReducation]

I think it’s important here to clarify what we intend with our priorities.

First and foremost is God. - we serve God best by being there for our families as the best parents we can. We MODEL God for them by serving others.

I’m afraid that our society has made us think that to be ideal parents, we have to see to it that our kids are in all kinds of secular activities like sports, etc. thereby neglecting church and our community in the process.

If we, as mothers are able to find service oriented projects wherein we can involve our children (if we can’t we simply aren’t looking); then we have
-kept God first
AND
-kept our children/family’s best interest first also
AND
-shown them how to find Christ - (be it as a priest or however they are called)
AND (here’s the best part)

• WE feel fulfilled and special too because we have fully fulfilled our vocations for God.

Now, I only have three in diapers and one on the way while being caregiver to my mother, so I imagine a time when I will need to cut back on my church vocations (yes - that is plural); but I’m afraid that society has gone overboard to make mothers feel like their children are supposed to be “busy” at all times in convenient secular activities that do nothing to help them find themselves spiritually. To me, this is the greatest disservice we can do for our children. I admit I am “young” as a mother in that my children are young; but I have had the benefit of wiser council.

I do not mind if anyone wants to censure me on this; so I will say it again more plainly: being a good mother MUST involve charitible activities within the community preferably through church but always for the glory of God; never to the detriment of our children.

There are wonderful examples of mothers who had vocations within the vocation, in a manner of speaking. You may want to read about them. Two three that come to mined right away are:

Elizabeth Ann Seton, Louise de Marillac and Gianna Molla.

They were wives and mothers. Within that vocation, God gave them another vocation. Elizabeth Ann Seton summarized it well in her spiritual writings. She always said of herself, “I am mother first.”

As far as secular activities, we have to be careful. The Church encourages families to engage in certain secular activities that are good for the mind and body, such as sports. This does not mean that sports take the place of Sunday mass. One has to try to fit things into the schedule so that all obligations are met. Children have spiritual, emotional, physical, social and cognitive needs. Parents have to be attentive to them. It’s not an easy thing to try to cover all the bases. That’s what makes many parents saints. They go the extra mile to provide for the needs of their children, not just their material needs (clothes, etc).

Just this past year the Holy Father has given a big endorsement to both sports and the arts as helpful to the Christian spiritual life.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[JillianRose]

WOW!! I just wanted to know what else is out there. I not only practice Catholicism, but I send my children to Catholic school. I am not involving my children in anything until they show an interest unless it is Church related (Like VBS). My 5 year old is into drawing right now and my 2 year old likes to run around naked. (LOL) I am not one for planing their future. I am not a Queen B or a Tiger mom. I stay home and CUT all the corners to send my kids to Catholic school. I find it wonderful. Not only do I love the HIGH standard they have for my children BUT I do it because I am investing in their heart. I can’t say what a blessing our school is to my kids. I am worried about tuition right now. All I want is my children to love the Lord and have a relationship with him. That is all I can ask. I am just looking for something 1 nite a week to get me out of the house. Thank you so much for your kind words and loving responses. I am most grateful for such caring Catholics.

In Catholic Love,
Jill

 

[JReducation]

WOW!! I just wanted to know what else is out there. I not only practice Catholicism, but I send my children to Catholic school. I am not involving my children in anything until they show an interest unless it is Church related (Like VBS). My 5 year old is into drawing right now and my 2 year old likes to run around naked. (LOL) I am not one for planing their future. I am not a Queen B or a Tiger mom. I stay home and CUT all the corners to send my kids to Catholic school. I find it wonderful. Not only do I love the HIGH standard they have for my children BUT I do it because I am investing in their heart. I can’t say what a blessing our school is to my kids. I am worried about tuition right now. All I want is my children to love the Lord and have a relationship with him. That is all I can ask. I am just looking for something 1 nite a week to get me out of the house. Thank you so much for your kind words and loving responses. I am most grateful for such caring Catholics.

In Catholic Love,
Jill

If you can get your hands on it there are two videos that you may want to pick up or the books

A Time for Miracles

Love Is a Choice

Two extraordinary mothers. You may get some ideas from them.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[laszlo]

Please don’t suggest that. Some people will read this and take you literally. Then, if this does happen that a parent pushes their son toward the seminary and the young man is denied admission, there are all kinds of problems.

I mean it literally. This is the survival of the Catholic faith.

This year less than 400 priest will be ordained in the US, this is supply for 12,000 priests, who can serve safely 24 million catholics instead of the 86 million today.

Unless the value of the priesthood is introduced at early age as the most positive value; there will be no priests to provide confession and the last rites.

The communist said: do not teach religion to your child, let him chose. This did not worked.

The fair from the frustration is some modern illness. When I was child the slogan was: the grass grew under pressure, and this worked. Many collapse is due to the overly protected childhood: they just do not know how to resolve problems.

I was in seminary. Half of my first year classmates were pushed by parents, half not. The parental vocations are all priest now after 50 years. Only one form the rest. i do not believe that my class was the exception.

 

[InspiritCarol]

Just this past year the Holy Father has given a big endorsement to both sports and the arts as helpful to the Christian spiritual life.

Thank you. Yes, these activities can and should be helpful; but from a practical standpoint, they are not.

I played at the varsity level of two different sports, back in the day; we were even division champs, and the best part was that it did not interfere with church or school in any way.

Unfortunately, these days are different.

Tournaments are all day Sunday events; and if the youth choose to miss practice in order to participate in “youth group” at any church, they are benched for the next game.

We have wonderful, loving Catholic moms we simply never seen due to sporting events and, needless to say their families aren’t seen either.

Perhaps this is simply a symptom of the God-hating Pacific NW, IDK. I have to wonder in this over-competitive environment, if God isn’t put on a back-burner throughout the states and abroad.

 

[JillianRose]

So then my second question would be: What if I wanted to go to some sort of Seminary school? Do Lay people go to Seminary in the Catholic church. I think maybe I could do one class a week until my kids are done. I really feel the calling to help out spiritually. I think that doing so would require some sort of training. What do lay people do when they want to mentor in the church?