What is proper clothing for any Mass?

[krazykatlady]

Raised in Miami Florida. 1950’s and 1960’s no air conditioning and there were no: shorts, halter tops (yes we had them), bathing suits or other skimpy clothing. Now that there is air conditioning it seems that many people are wearing less and less to Mass.

I was raised in the South before the beginning of time and our churches were not air conditioned. Ladies wore dresses, hats, nylons, and gloves, and men wore coats and ties. The only way we could cool ourselves was with those cardboard fans from the funeral home that were placed in the pews.
Now that our churches are air conditioned folks come schlupping in to Mass in tank tops and shorts. And no, these are not poor folk, not by a long shot.
Surprisingly, I recently visited a parish in southern California and I didn’t see nearly as much immodest and sloppy dress as I see back east.

 

[PeteZaHut]

So you are willing to live by “society’s” dress code. Would you live by your parish’s dress code?

I don’t think it would be appropriate for a parish to designate a dress code for God’s house.

 

[PatienceAndLove]

I don’t think it would be appropriate for a parish to designate a dress code for God’s house.

I think it is more than appropriate.
My parish priest has admonished the congregation by way of the weekly bulletin. I think it’s time for him to say something from the pulpit (surprised he has not!) and post something at every entrance.
The Archdiocese of Manila has designated a dress code, at the request of parishioners.

Male Catholics should wear “long-sleeved polo shirts, collared shirts, or t-shirts paired with either slacks or jeans”, the circular directed, advising against wearing caps, basketball jerseys, tank tops, and shorts to church.

Women were told to stick to dresses, long gowns, or collared blouses as against spaghetti-strap tops, tank tops, short skirts, skimpy shorts and sleeveless shirts with plunging necklines

 

[MrsMW]

I was raised in the South before the beginning of time and our churches were not air conditioned. Ladies wore dresses, hats, nylons, and gloves, and men wore coats and ties. The only way we could cool ourselves was with those cardboard fans from the funeral home that were placed in the pews.
Now that our churches are air conditioned folks come schlupping in to Mass in tank tops and shorts. And no, these are not poor folk, not by a long shot.
Surprisingly, I recently visited a parish in southern California and I didn’t see nearly as much immodest and sloppy dress as I see back east.

When our Byzantine Church was consecrated by the bishop we had some guests. One girl in front of me was wearing a halter style dress. While it was warm outside it was cold inside. I prayed to the Holy Theotokos to make it so cold that the girl would be forced to put on her sweater. By the middle of Divine Liturgy it was and she did!

By the way I am in southern California and except for a few good parishes most women dress pretty bad. When I came into the Church from being an evangelical I was shocked! Thank goodness my Byzantine parish is much better!

 

[Javierps]

This is primarily a cultural Question. Let me give you an example from society. When I began my career I had to go to work in a Suit and Tie, this is the way it was from 1980 till about 1997ish. The business culture demanded it out a a sign of respect for work and for any customers you might come across on. then there was a change in the late 90’s with the Internet boom, and the Baby Boomers reaching high levels of management. It became acceptable to wear “business casual” khakis and golf shits being the norm. Then Friday were “jeans” day! the general rule became comfort over style. This happened for two reason #1 communication with customers became mostly electronic and #2 the hours worked at the desk ( without breaks) became unbearably long. Now when I meet with presidents of companies or customers they are also in casual dress. the only time we may dress in suits or Ties is for infrequent events such as conferences or industry banquets. Now this is my experience but the younger generation has no such frame of reference.

So, What should people wear at Mass? the cultural answer is Dress Up for the Feast Days, and casual but neat for the ordinary days. I know some ( especially older folks) Will find casual but neat dress an offensive but this is because of their cultural frame of reference.

Another point I want to make is the “Ole Sunday Best” Idea is more Protestant than Catholic. In the Catholic model of worship
the Church bells would ring 5 minutes before daily Mass, then the shop keepers would close up and come as they were. After Mass they would go back to work. No need to change. Well in this day and age a good portion of our people work on Sundays, so to distinguish Sunday by wearing the “Ole Sunday Best” does not really apply. Again this is a cultural question which I am trying to answer in context.

An older woman approached me after Mass a couple weeks back complaining about the youth and how they were dressed. I had to tell her I agreed the dress should be “appropriate” but it would be better to concentrate on the youth who didn’t come to Mass rather than hassle the ones who did. Let the Holy Spirit work in their hearts and they will come to know what is appropriate. As for our jobs as the laity? Treat the ones you consider inappropriately dressed with Faith, Hope & Charity let the holy spirit to the rest.

 

[thechrismyster]

summertime…
nice pants or shorts and a clean shirt.

Winter
Jeans or pants and a nice shirt. (skirt or pants for women… whatever works)

 

[SeekerJen]

Then, too, I don’t like priests in sandals. It represents very little and is more distracting than anything.

I could be mistaken, but don’t Franciscan priests and brothers often wear sandals? It’s not intended to be distracting.

 

[KathleenElsie]

I dislike flip-flops on the servers mostly. They make this awful sound that makes me think of being stuck in the mud. In a quiet church they can sound like a rocket going off.

 

[PatienceAndLove]

I could be mistaken, but don’t Franciscan priests and brothers often wear sandals? It’s not intended to be distracting.

Yep, they do.
I’ve seen Franciscans wear socks with their sandals.
Ever seen a sock and sandaled Franciscan snowboarding on a cafeteria tray? I have

 

[PatienceAndLove]

Proper Clothings for Mass (Bare minimum)

Weekly/Sunday Mass
Men: Clean Khaki Pants (dark brown, khaki colored, black, etc) and a polo shirt, button down shirt, or button-down with tie. Nice shoes such as dockers or sketchers

Women: Clean slacks (pressed, etc) or skirt (knee length or longer) and a nice non-tight 3/4 length (short sleeves for you Southerners, Floridians and Californians) sweater, button down, or dressy “t-shirt”, or a modest dress (knee length or longer) with 3/4 length sleeves (same as above)

Little girls: Same as mommy, or dress/jumper
Little boys: Same as daddy

Easter and Christmas
Men and Women: break out the nice suits or the fancy “Christmas/Easter” outfit. Use the above as a guideline. And tuxes are always nice

 

[SeekerJen]

Yep, they do.
I’ve seen Franciscans wear socks with their sandals.
Ever seen a sock and sandaled Franciscan snowboarding on a cafeteria tray? I have

Can’t say that I have. Now THAT would be distracting during Mass!

 

[PatienceAndLove]

Can’t say that I have. Now THAT would be distracting during Mass!

Well, of course it would be!!!
LoL. This was when Franciscan got closed for a few days because the roads up the hill were impassable (no profs). So we all had some fun outside int he snow, including the Brothers.

 

[lizaanne]

Women: Clean slacks (pressed, etc) or skirt (knee length or longer) and a nice non-tight 3/4 length (short sleeves for you Southerners, Floridians and Californians) sweater, button down, or dressy “t-shirt”, or a modest dress (knee length or longer) with 3/4 length sleeves (same as above)

Sorry - you loose me on the 3/4 sleeve thing. I would never go so far as sleeveless or spaghetti straps, but our church is not air conditioned (and it’s been in the 90s here!!)! I would truly pass out from heat with my head covered and 3/4 sleeves and a longish skirt. Yes - the priest is far more covered than I would be, but I have serious issues with heat and do not tolerate it well. I’m just about passing out after an hour and a half (Mass and Benediction) as it is!!

Otherwise - I’m good with all your suggestions, except for the name brand thing. Not everyone afford that, so I would just say nice clean shoes covering the whole foot.

~Liza

 

[PatienceAndLove]

Sorry - you loose me on the 3/4 sleeve thing. I would never go so far as sleeveless or spaghetti straps, but our church is not air conditioned (and it’s been in the 90s here!!)! I would truly pass out from heat with my head covered and 3/4 sleeves and a longish skirt. Yes - the priest is far more covered than I would be, but I have serious issues with heat and do not tolerate it well. I’m just about passing out after an hour and a half (Mass and Benediction) as it is!!

Otherwise - I’m good with all your suggestions, except for the name brand thing. Not everyone afford that, so I would just say nice clean shoes covering the whole foot.

~Liza

It’s ok. It’s my opinion, and what I hold myself and my family to… only I don’t wear slacks.
As for the name brands, they were just for reference. I can’t afford them myself.

 

[Malcolm_McLean]

Um…no offense intended, but how does that answer my questions? As a real woman, I understand that I am not pornography and thus do not dress as such.

You asked about dress being an occasion of sin.
Pornography is an occasion for sin. Scantily clad women are not. The reason is that the people who make the pornography are very clever, and know how to present their subjects in a titillating way. So dress is unliley to be an occasion for sin in the way that you meant it.

However real women are still a source of sexual interest to men, unless they are dressed very modestly indeed. Muslims know this, demanding full facial veils. However their program doesn’t succeed - the level of homosexuality and other perversions in Arab countries is extremely high. Temporary veils at Mass, and for consecrated women like nuns, are a better solution.

I also don’t understand why the modesty strictures are only posted for women. Is it okay for men to wear shorts? How about very snug trousers that display front bulges? Shirts unbuttoned halfway down the chest? Large jewelry? Lots of cologne?

Female sexuality is not the mirror image of male. Women’s magazines contain pictures of beautiful women in striking and half-dressed poses, not pictures of men. Then men are there, but in the context of celebrity relationship stories. It makes sense to have different rules for men and women.

Shorts are not in my view acceptable for adult men at church (in Britian it is traditional for little boys to wear them), but not because they are immodest, because they are casual.

 

[SeekerJen]

You asked about dress being an occasion of sin.
Pornography is an occasion for sin. Scantily clad women are not. The reason is that the people who make the pornography are very clever, and know how to present their subjects in a titillating way. So dress is unliley to be an occasion for sin in the way that you meant it.

However real women are still a source of sexual interest to men, unless they are dressed very modestly indeed. Muslims know this, demanding full facial veils. However their program doesn’t succeed - the level of homosexuality and other perversions in Arab countries is extremely high. Temporary veils at Mass, and for consecrated women like nuns, are a better solution.

Female sexuality is not the mirror image of male. Women’s magazines contain pictures of beautiful women in striking and half-dressed poses, not pictures of men. Then men are there, but in the context of celebrity relationship stories. It makes sense to have different rules for men and women.

Shorts are not in my view acceptable for adult men at church (in Britian it is traditional for little boys to wear them), but not because they are immodest, because they are casual.

I’m starting to think that clothing (or lack thereof) is a much bigger issue on this side of the pond. I have been assured many, many times that women’s clothing and appearance is indeed an occasion of sin for men, so much so that some men will get up and move if they are seated near an attractive woman at Mass lest they be tempted to look at her. Men also frequently admit to seeing an immodestly clothed woman, then holding on to the mental image of her for hours or days later so that they can dwell on it in private.

 

[LCMS_No_More]

Then, too, I don’t like priests in sandals. It represents very little and is more distracting than anything.

I went to a TLM once where the priest was wearing sandals…which are part of his habit as he’s in a religious order that wears them.

 

[Malcolm_McLean]

I’m starting to think that clothing (or lack thereof) is a much bigger issue on this side of the pond. I have been assured many, many times that women’s clothing and appearance is indeed an occasion of sin for men, so much so that some men will get up and move if they are seated near an attractive woman at Mass lest they be tempted to look at her. Men also frequently admit to seeing an immodestly clothed woman, then holding on to the mental image of her for hours or days later so that they can dwell on it in private.

In Britain we had a craze for belly buttons. Then it spread to half- bare bottoms. The first time I saw this I thought the girl had made a dreadful mistake. Then I saw another and another and realised that it was deliberate.

Maybe I am generalising from myself to all men, but personally I don’t find that this has any real similarity to pornography.

 

[Theodore]

I agree that we shouldn’t judge others, but I think in this day and age of “let’s not upset anyone”, we have gotten too weak-kneed to speak up and challenge people to take an honest assessment of themselves in this area. What people need to do is look hard at their own choice of attire and ask themselves if they really are wearing Sunday’s best. You can’t judge others, but you can judge yourself.

If everyone really did that, then there would probably not be the all-too-casual attitude toward divine worship that pervades today. Some people just need to be called to task on this area of self-evaluation. Many are never challenged, so they don’t rise to the occasion.

I agree we shouldn’t judge others when it comes to dress sense, because ussually they end up judging themselves by all there pathetic excuses…

 

[puzzleannie]

IMO modest, clean, gender-appropriate, and the best we have available to us.