What is the Catholic teaching on a hysterectomy, being open to children and marriage?

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AngelEyes4Jesus

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Hello,
I haven’t posted in a while but I will try to be brief. 👍

I have been blessed w/ 6 lovely children…however ALL 6 children required a C section. :eek:
I have had anything from very easy pregnancy and recoveries to very difficult preg and recoveries. With that being said…my last baby was born this past August. After surgery (the DR I have knew that I wanted more children and that we are open to life/children and so takes extra care to protect/stitch/staple my uterus after each baby) the DR told me he felt that my uterus was getting ‘thin’ …not yet a window (where the scar is )and that he felt I could probably have 1-2 more children …but that he thought I should put a 2-3 yr gap in between this and the next pregnancy.(all my other babies have been close in age)
This brought DH and I great relief to hear.

Then at my 6 week check up I was struggling very badly w/ PPD (which I don’t usually get too too bad) and in my hours of sleep deprivation, desperation and working 60 hrs a week (I went back to work when the baby was only 4 wks old) I told him I was angry that I had to be open to children still since I already had 6 and was struggling managing the house and kids because our finances had changed and I was more of the bread winner now He then said he felt that I shouldn’t have anymore d/t the risks involved in my uterus. I reminded him that 6 wks prior he said I could probably have more and he said he told me that so as not cause sadness during a time that I should be focusing on the newest baby. He then said in his prof opinion it could be life threatening for me to have more children and that he recommend I take the pill. I reiterated my feelings on the pill and he said that he felt protecting my life was more important and wrote me a 'script for birth control. 🤷
I dropped off the 'script to have it filled but never picked it back up and so never actually started the the BC.
Then in October-ish (about 8-10 wks after giving birth) I started to hemmorage badly on and off. Requiring me to miss work x several times, miss church , and basically revolve my life around how much I was bleeding on any given day. This has carried on now from October until now. I have been soaking through adult incontinence pull ups in blood every 1-2 hrs anywhere from a day or 2 to a week then will stop bleeding then go back to soaking them then maybe have 5 days of needing to just wear a regular ‘pad’ but still requring to change them very VERY frequently.
Yesterday I finally went to the DR again and explained that I had ongoing bleeding, and hadnt started the pill d/t my beliefs. He asked why I hadn’t come to see him sooner as I am now very severely anemic. I explained that I thought the blood loss was my bodies natural way of recovering/healing from so many c sections recently and that it was an added bonus that is was a natural BC at the moment but that the blood loss has been so great that I couldnt live like this anymore because I am needing to have spare clothes in my car because at any given time I bleed through everything. 😊

He then basically told me my options were 1) an IUD. 2) the mini pill (i cant have a combined pill d/t past history of mini stroke) and 3) hysterectomy. he explained that the mini pill would not stop ovulation, rather stop implantation (same as the IUD) so it would in effect allow conception still. he said given church dogma and my will to follow it, my only option is a hysterectomy. :nope:

I am 29. I know I have 6 beautiful babies but that does not change the fact that I wanted more children, even if in some moments of distress I had said I didn’t want anymore RIGHT this second. The thought of having no uterus makes me feel less like a woman. and a part of me and DH enjoy the ‘what if’ or ‘maybe’ that is involved in NFP. we have never been upset to see a + pregnancy test.
I am devestated by this. Had I known my last baby was ’the last’, I would have cherished the preg more and insisted on a full 8-12 week recovery before going back to work. I feel as though I missed out on my last baby being an infant because I have been working so many hours.

I ponder, is it selfish to want another baby? Do I trust in God and NFP and say forget what the DR said, if I get preg again we’ll have faith and not worry about the risks? or do I say I must preserve my life for the current 6 children and husband and heed the DR warnings about hemmorging to death now and/or if I was to become pregnant again?
What is the church’s stance on this if I were to have a hystercetomy? Would we no longer be able to have relations d/t not being able to be open to children? Is a hysterectomy allowed d/t my health reasons even if a secondary effect would be loss of my fertility?
I am so confused and lost right now

Can anyone steer me in the right direction?
 
I am a little confused. Your immediate need is to stop the bleeding, but you make it sounds as though your doctor is only concerned about birth control. How would an IUD stop the bleeding? If you are telling the full story, I would urge you to find a prolife physician for a second opinion.

To answer your question, the Church certainly allows hysterectomy if there is a real medical need for it, and is not just for contraception. A couple can certainly have marital relations after a hysterectomy.
 
The DR has told me that BC would control the bleeding. To my understanding an IUD would put hormones directly into the uterus. and the pill would stop the bleeding and regulate the bleeding. W/o my willing to take the pills or have an IUD he said my only option to stop the bleeding would be the removal of the uterus…
 
I can’t give medical advice but I would certainly be looking for expert second and third opinions.
 
I strongly sugest looking for a second opinion. It does sound your doctor is more concerned about your birth control. Still, if taking the pill will help you recover these months, I think it’s okay taking it, and it’s not morally objectionable since your goal is trully based on health rather than selfishness.

I know a family with 11 kids. Their mother started having difficult pregnancies after her 4th or 5th kid, I think. She has had to take a lot of care during pregnancy and usually stays in bed as her doctor tells her… she has a problem with her uterus too but I’m not into much medical details. What I’ve know for sure is that she uses NFP, takes a lot of care of herself during pregnacy and recovery, prays a lot and trusts God.
 
Has your Dr discovered the reason your are still bleeding. Such an event sounds very abnormal and one would think there would be an abnormal reason for that to occur. If he has not, then I suggest you seek a second opinion, maybe even from a specialist (I believe they are reproductive endocrinologists). I would start to be worried about retained material or infection or other things.

Otherwise, if such a step such as a hormonal treatment or a hysterectomy becomes necessary for your health such things are allowed in Catholic teaching.
 
I have only one child. But she, and my divorce, came along before I became a Cathoic. Eleven years ago I had to have a hysterectomy due to heavy bleeding. I also had to wear those adult undergarments. No fun. I had become seriously anemic. Iron pills helped, but they didn’t address the reason I was taking them. Birth control wasn’t offered since I wasn’t married at the time. Besides which, the Women’s health coordinater and I had had the discussion about possible future children. She’s also a Catholic. She said that because of the medication I take (due to Major depression, Anxiety disorder, OCD and Borderline Personality disorder) it wouldn’t be right for me to have more children. I’d have to go off my meds, and that would be way to hard on me. It’s hard enough as it is.

Anyway, I had the hysterectomy. I haven’t had an indepth discussion with my priest on the possibilities of getting remarried, because the need for that discussion hasn’t come up. But, personally, I don’t see it as an issue. I’m getting old enough that if I hadn’t had the surgery, I’d probably be starting menopause about now anyway. I think you’re own health should be a big deciding point here. You have 6 children now. They need to have you around more than they need another sibling. But as has been suggested, get a second opinion. In fact, talk with your priest and see if he can suggest a doctor who could help you through this period in your life. Or at least someone who could be there for you.
 
AngelEyes4Jesus said:
Would we no longer be able to have relations d/t not being able to be open to children?
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I think you misunderstand what the Church teaches here. The Church teaches that each acat of intercourse must be ordered to unity and procreation. It is ordered to procreation if it is a completed act of vaginal intercourse.

Women who are past child bearing years, women who have become sterile through surgery, women who are sterile due to a lifelong defect, men who are sterile, etc, all can have relations with their spouse.
 
I would urge you to seek help from another doctor, preferably one who specialises in bio identical hormone therapy. Naprotechnology could also be very helpful to you, as I know they fix cycle issues with things like natural progesterone. naprotechnology.com/surgical.htm

Also bear in mind that many experts in womens’ hormones suggest that hysterectomy should only ever be performed if a woman has cancer. I totally agree, as I truly feel that mot womens’ health issues can be sorted with bio identicals. I feel that the pill and hysterectomies are just band-aids, and barbaric ones with that. It is very common for postpartum women (especially women with multiple children) to have issues with low progesterone/high oestrogen/oestrogen dominance/hypothyroidism and even adrenal jnsufficiceny in some cases. Sadly many doctors don’t tend to optimise these areas: they often just resort to drastic surgery. The good doctors very often don’t take insurance unfortunately. If you would like names of some good docs who specialise in these areas, please feel free to pm me.

I’d also suggest checking out the work of doctors like Dr John Lee, Dr. F. Hotze and Dr Raymond Peat. I can also recommend some FB groups where we women talk about hormone issues, and none of us are on the BCP!
 
I think your doctor is recommending the pill and the Iud not only as birth control but as a way to reduce the hormonal bleeding. Many women get heavy, heavy periods as they get older, to the point of near debilitation. It’s very hard to cope with especially with six children and a full time job. It does sound as though he is trying to offer you the choices in his toolbox- hormones, or surgery. I would be wary of the hormones if you have had a stroke before. There is also endometrial ablation, but that may not be safe after all your c sections, and normally ends up causing you to be unable to conceive again as well. I’m so sorry you are facing this.
I might suggest, in addition to a second opinion, that you speak with your priest. It is not impossible that getting pregnany with a uterus near rupture could in fact cause you to bleed to death 😦 that is very frightening! Best to you, I hope you find some answers soon.
 
OP, you perhaps could get relief via bio identical hormones, and these do not act as abortificants or contraceptives. Please do keep that in mind that it is not just a choice between the BCP or a hysterectomy.
 
PaulfromIowa said:
I am a little confused. Your immediate need is to stop the bleeding, but you make it sounds as though your doctor is only concerned about birth control. How would an IUD stop the bleeding? If you are telling the full story, I would urge you to find a prolife physician for a second opinion.

To answer your question, the Church certainly allows hysterectomy if there is a real medical need for it, and is not just for contraception. A couple can certainly have marital relations after a hysterectomy.
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I see a pro life doctor. In fact she is Catholic and is an NFP only doctor.

SHE talked to me about “birth control” pills. And commented that “this is really the only thing they are good for.” This, being stopping heavy bleeding. And IUD would do the same thing. They release hormones that stop a woman’s cycle.

In that case, taking birth control pills are to stop the bleeding, the side effect is, well, birth control. They weren’t an option for me because of my medical history, but otherwise, my prolife, Catholic, NFP only doctor would have given them to me.
 
Is there something preventing you from accessing doctors who specialise in bio-identicals? I know you have a lot of children, so perhaps your finances do not allow this. However it sounds like this doctor is not going to be at all helpful to you with regards to bioidentical hormones or optimising the thyroid etc. In your shoes I would do my own research and read the works of the doctors mentioned above. There is plenty of help out there for women in your position.

Blessings to you…
 
I had a hysterectomy in my early 30’s, and it was sure nice to get rid of all of that pain and bleeding. Although I did experience some severe pain right when I woke up from surgery, the whole thing was a piece of cake compared to having a baby. They kept my ovaries in, so I didn’t even have to take any hormones.

It sounds like your uterus has been destroyed by all of those “C” sections. I think you need to do something before you bleed to death. Those children need a healthy Mom!
 
Listener said:
I had a hysterectomy in my early 30’s, and it was sure nice to get rid of all of that pain and bleeding. Although I did experience some severe pain right when I woke up from surgery, the whole thing was a piece of cake compared to having a baby. They kept my ovaries in, so I didn’t even have to take any hormones.

It sounds like your uterus has been destroyed by all of those “C” sections. I think you need to do something before you bleed to death. Those children need a healthy Mom!
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Same here. (when I was 31). We had two kids. We were done and I was in agony.

I agree. My Dr. back then said he wouldn’t recommend any more C sections after two kids. the OP has six and she is in pain. I would get a second opinion…but OP, no one will call you out if you have a hysterectomy.
 
Julianna said:
Same here. (when I was 31). We had two kids. We were done and I was in agony.

I agree. My Dr. back then said he wouldn’t recommend any more C sections after two kids. the OP has six and she is in pain. I would get a second opinion…but OP, no one will call you out if you have a hysterectomy.
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Listener said:
I had a hysterectomy in my early 30’s, and it was sure nice to get rid of all of that pain and bleeding. Although I did experience some severe pain right when I woke up from surgery, the whole thing was a piece of cake compared to having a baby. They kept my ovaries in, so I didn’t even have to take any hormones.

It sounds like your uterus has been destroyed by all of those “C” sections. I think you need to do something before you bleed to death. Those children need a healthy Mom!
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I guess what worries me, is that the doctor said that while her uterus was thin it was still healthy enough for another pregnancy and c-section if she wanted it. This is why I think many of us think she needs a second opinion. Somehow it seems, she went from fine for another pregnancy is a few years, to bleeding so badly she potentially needs a hysterectomy.

But like everyone has said, if a hysterectomy does become medically necessary, then there is nothing for you to prevent you from getting it.
 
Thank you for the replies! I have started taking a progestrone supplement daily since posting last. The bleeding has slowed, but not stopped. I have also undergone some further testing and diagnostic imaging and the DR thinks I have endometriosis and andomyosis. 😦 andomyosis can not 100% be confirmed though until after a hystorectomy. I have been in touch HR and am eligable for FMLA. I am undecided as what I am going to do at this point. Either use FMLA when the days and pain is just too much to bare or use FMLA while I recover from the surgery if I go through w/ it. my DR would like suregry to take place in May at this point. I am undecided. A part of me is so fed up w/ the pain and revolving my whole life around the bleeding an the other part of me says what if I wait just a little while longer maybe I will heal. But I did speak w/ my mother recently (whom I have a bit of a strained relationship w/ so don’t speak to often) and she explained to me that she had a hyst. in her early 30’s d/t endometriosis as did my grandmother (although they didn’t call it endometriosis at the time) so I am sorta wondering if this is just the next unavoidable step in this chapter of my life. 🤷

Thank u for the thoughts and prayers! I will keep you updated…
 
Hello AngelEyes4Jesus

Are you taking natural progesterone? I know Dr Ray Peat recommends much higher than normal doses of this for endo. Have you looked into diet and herbs for endo also? This video is very informative: eastwesthealing.com/best-treatment-for-endometriosis/.

Would the hysterectomy allow you to still keep your ovaries? Just wondering because you are less likely to run into hormonal problems that way…

Blessings to you.
 
AngelEyes4Jesus said:
Thank you for the replies! I have started taking a progestrone supplement daily since posting last. The bleeding has slowed, but not stopped. I have also undergone some further testing and diagnostic imaging and the DR thinks I have endometriosis and andomyosis. 😦 andomyosis can not 100% be confirmed though until after a hystorectomy. I have been in touch HR and am eligable for FMLA. I am undecided as what I am going to do at this point. Either use FMLA when the days and pain is just too much to bare or use FMLA while I recover from the surgery if I go through w/ it. my DR would like suregry to take place in May at this point. I am undecided. A part of me is so fed up w/ the pain and revolving my whole life around the bleeding an the other part of me says what if I wait just a little while longer maybe I will heal. But I did speak w/ my mother recently (whom I have a bit of a strained relationship w/ so don’t speak to often) and she explained to me that she had a hyst. in her early 30’s d/t endometriosis as did my grandmother (although they didn’t call it endometriosis at the time) so I am sorta wondering if this is just the next unavoidable step in this chapter of my life. 🤷

Thank u for the thoughts and prayers! I will keep you updated…
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Warning: sympathy ranting mixed with advice ahead…

Hysterectomy may not be inevitable. Don’t let anyone start cutting pieces out of you until you have consulted with a doctor trained in surgical NaPro Technology. I see one myself, and they do everything they can to keep your body intact. Their surgical skills allow them to remove endo with precision, and they can correct hormone imbalances using bioidentical hormones. Their skills make the suggestions you are getting look like primitive butchery in comparison.

I’m sorry to sound so harsh, but after having doctors offer to remove my ovaries back when I was 23, I began looking for better alternatives (partly through asking people on CAF). This led me to find a few alternatives to start with, and eventually, after several years, my journey led me to a NaPro doctor who is taking care of my issues without yanking important organs. Now that I know what I know, I’m so frustrated that this is the best advice so many of us women get from our doctors. We deserve better than to be placed in surgically-induced menopause (complete with hot flashes and bone loss–oh goody!) before we turn 35. Your uterus does more for your body than just support pregnancies. Make sure you understand what will change after a hysterectomy if you do end up having one–the good the bad and the ugly—before you consent to it.

I’m pretty sure there are NaPro surgeons on the East Coast, as I have heard other patients in online support groups mention them. You should be able to find one in the directory at
fertilitycare.org. They are worth driving to, if it comes to that.

As far as church teaching goes the hysterectomy is morally permissible if the intent is not contraceptive, but therapeutic.

But, there may be healthier options out there for you. Please get a second opinion, if you possibly can.

Good luck.
 
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