What is the cause of most unhappiness?

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Pag_Hingowa

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You experience happiness to the degree you direct your life to serve a greater good. What then is the cause of most unhappiness?
 
When I am unhappy, it is usually because I want someTHING that I can’t have. I often get caught up in the world and the worldly ‘things’ which distract me from living spiritually.
 
You experience happiness to the degree you direct your life to serve a greater good. What then is the cause of most unhappiness?
[The Buddha said:]“And this, monks is the noble truth of the origination of unhappiness: the selfish desire that makes for further becoming — accompanied by passion and delight, relishing now here and now there — i.e., craving for sensual pleasure, craving for becoming, craving for non-becoming.”

— Dhammacakkappavattana sutta, Samyutta Nikaya 56.11
Selfish desire causes unhappiness. Wanting things we don’t have. Having things we don’t want.

rossum
 
You experience happiness to the degree you direct your life to serve a greater good. What then is the cause of most unhappiness?
To a certain extent there is need to understand what you mean my “happiness” as, as an “emotional” experience it will ebb and flow like any other emotion.
If you refer to happiness in the sense of peace, of contentment and well being - a knowledge that you and your life are properly ordered to Love then it becomes obvious that “unhappiness” stems from not being properly ordered to Love.

Now having said that, in a broader sense, unhappiness (sorrow) can some from seeing, and feeling for, others who are in sin, especially those whom are close to us in this life, a child family member friend etc.
But this too derives from our love being properly ordered since such sorrow is a result of our desire for the greatest good for our fellows. In other words from our Agape Love.

Peace
James
 
I believe most unhappiness is experienced because I do not pursue the awareness of how much the Lord loves me by meditating on His Life and what He has done for me.
 
As Christians, we are called to “die to ourselves.”

I believe that the more that we have “died to ourselves,” the happier we can be - and vice versa.
 
Scipture and the Church both teach about happiness. There are four levels of happiness.

Gratification: Instant gratification is the lowest form of happiness. A new car, a new pair of shoes, a filet mignon, sex, are all things which give us instant gratification. This is very self-centered happiness, and short lived.

Achievment: Personal achievement is a higher form of happiness than gratification of our desires. Getting compliments for our behavior or for things we have done, the plaque on the wall and the award at the national meeting, mother of the year award, etc., but they are still fleeting, and can be self centerd, though we do start to reach out beyond our own desires to touch others.

Philanthropy: Doing things to help others provides a higher level of happiness than personal achievement, but if it is not united to Christ, it sometimes feeds our pride. Philanthropy does draw us out of ourselves, away from our own carnal desires, to touch other people’s lives, and so it provides a higher level of happiness than the previous two.

**Beatitude: **The beatific vision, union with the Trinity, is the happiness to which God has called us. The closer we unite ourselves to the Trinity, the happier we will be. True happiness will come only on the other side of the grave, but to the extent that we can do so here in this life, we should try to unite outselves to the Trinity here and now.

The catechism speaks of the theological virtue of hope.

1817 Hope is the theological virtue by which we desire the kingdom of heaven and eternal life as our happiness, placing our trust in Christ’s promises and relying not on our own strength, but on the help of the grace of the Holy Spirit. "

Hope is a desire for heaven, eternal life, and a desire for beatific vision, union with the trinity, as our happiness. Paul says that we “hope for what is not yet seen”, we will only achieve that when we get to heaven. Then we will be happy. But the closer we work toward achieving that here and now, the happier we will be.

-Tim-
 
Echoing Philotheatoo and rossum to some extent, I think human unhappiness comes from leaving home to seek greater fulfillment than what we already have, by not recognizing or valuing the great wealth naturally at our disposal. And humans are born away from home, so to speak, already in exile or at least prone to it, prone towards looking over the fence. Ironically we’re distracted life-long from happiness by seeking power, glory, pleasure, and things, all for the purpose of making ourselves happier. We can end up making ourselves and each other miserable in the process.
 
I guess sin causes the most unhappiness, although most people sin in a warped intention of actually being happier.

What also would be good to discuss here; do we believe that Jesus wants us to be happy here on Earth? I’m not certain, based on several verses such as “he who loves his life will lose it”, and “woe to him who is now full”, “pick up your cross and follow Me”. Are we supposed to be happy?🤷
 
I guess sin causes the most unhappiness, although most people sin in a warped intention of actually being happier.

What also would be good to discuss here; do we believe that Jesus wants us to be happy here on Earth? I’m not certain, based on several verses such as “he who loves his life will lose it”, and “woe to him who is now full”, “pick up your cross and follow Me”. Are we supposed to be happy?🤷
We’re designed to be happy, according to the Catechism-God places that natural desire in our hearts and it’s what motivates us to seek the highest good. It’s just that we seek it in all the wrong places. In this life happiness is elusive, because here we don’t “see” God “face to face” as scripture puts it. We keep trying but a big part of what our life here is all about is finding out just how much we need God-how futile it is to seek complete happiness in created things.** “Vanity of vanities”**, Solomon laments in Ecclesiastes, "There’s nothing new under the sun."
 
We’re designed to be happy, according to the Catechism-God places that natural desire in our hearts and it’s what motivates us to seek the highest good. It’s just that we seek it in all the wrong places. In this life happiness is elusive, because here we don’t “see” God “face to face” as scripture puts it. We keep trying but a big part of what our life here is all about is finding out just how much we need God-how futile it is to seek complete happiness in created things.** “Vanity of vanities”**, Solomon laments in Ecclesiastes, "There’s nothing new under the sun."
I understand that, and believe the same thing. But if we have things and basically live a comfortable life (house, food to eat, job, 401k for retirement, etc), and generally enjoy life (watch sports, eat BBQ, enjoy beer with friends, etc.) but still go to church several times per week, pray daily, help the poor, have a strong faithful marriage, is it wrong to be happy? Obviously not perfectly happy, but certainly not a suffering cross filled life.
 
Who even wants happiness in this miserable and corrupt world? Being content is the best we can do. Happiness is for the World-to-Come. Where in Catholic teachings does it infer that we should seek happiness in this world? Consider the following sources for why we should lament in this world:

Holy Scripture:
Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life.
-John 12:25

Catholic prayer:
Hail Holy Queen, Mother of Mercy, our life our sweetness and our hope. To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve; To thee do we send up our sighs, mourning and weeping in this valley of tears. Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy toward us and after this our exile show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus. O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary!

Testimony of a Great Saint:
*The Golden Key to Heaven
by Saint Anthony Mary Claret

The death of the just: Death will reach everyone, the good and the bad; but the destiny of each one is quite different. The just man sees himself in this valley of tears as a prisoner, serving a very hard term. He considers himself a slave in this world, suffering an extremely distressing servitude. He regards himself a sailor caught in a horrible storm. And as death means an end of his confinement, an end of his slavery, and is the port of his salvation, he ceases not to cry with David, “Woe is me that my sojourning is prolonged!. . .” (Ps. 119:5). He ceases not to ask with the Apostle, “. . . Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?” (Rom. 7:24)*

Orthodox Judaism:
Refraining from indulging in the pleasures of this world is only a fine preparation for avoda (service of G-d). Avoda itself is transforming the physical into a vehicle for G-dliness
– Hayom Yom, Sivan 17
 
To a certain extent there is need to understand what you mean my “happiness” as, as an “emotional” experience it will ebb and flow like any other emotion.
If you refer to happiness in the sense of peace, of contentment and well being - a knowledge that you and your life are properly ordered to Love then it becomes obvious that “unhappiness” stems from not being properly ordered to Love.

Now having said that, in a broader sense, unhappiness (sorrow) can some from seeing, and feeling for, others who are in sin, especially those whom are close to us in this life, a child family member friend etc.
But this too derives from our love being properly ordered since such sorrow is a result of our desire for the greatest good for our fellows. In other words from our Agape Love.

Peace
James
I will give you my definition of unhappiness. Unhappiness is a matter of where we choose to focus. Focus on serving ONLY the self and it can be pretty depressing. The universe it seems designed us to serve the universe, not just the individual self and happiness is our reward.
 
I will give you my definition of unhappiness. Unhappiness is a matter of where we choose to focus. Focus on serving ONLY the self and it can be pretty depressing. The universe it seems designed us to serve the universe, not just the individual self and happiness is our reward.
I think that this is a very fine definition except that I would exchange two words for one…I would change “the universe” to “God”.

Peace
James
 
You experience happiness to the degree you direct your life to serve a greater good. What then is the cause of most unhappiness?
Pag:

The unrequited desire for perfections that we have quiet notions of, yet ever remain impossible to attain. We then replace that sought perfection with substitutions that we believe can suffice, only to discover that they do not, and that we still have not come close to attaining the sought-after perfection.

As Rossum’s quote implies, those substitutions more often than not make us even more distraught over this situation.

God bless,
jd
 
is it wrong to be happy?
I, like Upbeatjonm, question achievement of ‘true’ happiness. This is a fleeting emotion for me, experienced only in ‘thin places’ when and where I am THE closest to God and/or am feeling Him in my heart. I believe that, for me, THAT is the essence of True happiness and, it only comes from union with God which, in this world, cannot be maintained but will be when, as Augustine says, “our hearts rest in [Him]”

Sorry if that doesn’t seem like it makes sense, it is the best I can do. 🤷
 
I understand that, and believe the same thing. But if we have things and basically live a comfortable life (house, food to eat, job, 401k for retirement, etc), and generally enjoy life (watch sports, eat BBQ, enjoy beer with friends, etc.) but still go to church several times per week, pray daily, help the poor, have a strong faithful marriage, is it wrong to be happy? Obviously not perfectly happy, but certainly not a suffering cross filled life.
It’s never wrong to be happy. It’s just that, in our misguided pursuits of happiness we may well do wrong things. And I think saints actually are built in such a way as to be unhappy unless they’re taking up their cross more earnestly, perhaps, than others, giving their lives over to God more fully.

But the Church has much wisdom and balance on all this. Marriage and family is an important vocation, sanctioned by God IOW. To leave it and pursue a more aesthetic life would be sin for most of us. It’s not a perfect world where any of us can be absolutely secure that we’re doing all we can to please God-to do things right- but in any case we all have to keep trying to stay on the path-*all *of us are expected to work out our salvation and that involves striving to be holier. And we can do that from wherever we are,
 
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