What makes you saint?

[troubled_soul]

I have read we are called to be saints. I’ve also been told by a Salesian priest that “It’s simple to be a saint.” St. Don Bosco himself said “We become saints just by putting a lot of love and care in all we do, and doing it all with a smile, for the Lord, even when the going is hard.”

I keep thinking in my mind that a saint must be perfect, which seems too hard. I’ve just been feeling lately that the church demands these rigid things for me, which makes me want to draw from the church because I feel so restricted. For example, I need the following questions answered, which I ask as an eighteen year old.

To be holy, it is it wrong dress in the latest style? Or should I be dressing simple always?

Is it wrong to listen to the latest music? Should I only be listening to religious musics?

Is it wrong to spend one’s money on ipods, video games, or go to the movies?

Is it wrong to eat out at nice places?

Should I be praying instead of going to the movies or eating out? Also, should I spend all of my extra money helping others instead?

Am I supposed to be a priest? Reading a lot on St. Don Bosco, he said that God wants us to be supremely happy in this life and the next. But how do I know if God wants me to be a priest?

Ever since I’ve been very young up to now, I know I have wanted to fall in love with a girl (I’m a boy.) And for me, I feel I need someone else to complete me, someone to help me grow, and hopefully someone who I can help grow. I would like a kind, Catholic girl preferably. BUT, a priest also told me you should not choose not to be a priest just because you are attracted to girls. HOW do I know if I am forcing my will instead of God’s? In MY heart, I want to fall in true love with a girl. What should I do?

Those are all the questions I could think of for now. I don’t know if I should ask those questions to a priest.
Other than those questions, I agree with Catholic principles. I also allot time to pray every morning and night, and the rosary with my family. I also read the mass readings every day. Should I do more to be perfect, to be a saint? I feel like I can’t do it, it’s like either God wants me to hold to these restricting standards, and if that’s the case I can’t take this religion.

 

[distracted]

I keep thinking in my mind that a saint must be perfect… too hard.

I feel i have learned a things about being a saint. . In your post You don’t define “perfect”. To me, being perfect is doing what God wants (or trying). It really is about that simple. God wants people to love Him first, love others as we love ourselves… If we strive to do those things, we will become saints. What is hard is loving people when thye are not lovable, loving God when we go through trials that we think are sent by Him … It can be very confusing figuring out what is God and waht is non-God. The world, the flesh and the devil can be seemingly unconquerable enemies… which is why we always have to be on guard against their tactics.
God is love and would not ask/require you to do something you are not capable of doing.
When i was young, i made a lot of mistakes, committed many sins which i am still paying for and will pay for until the end (Purgatory on Earth). I have accepted that :crying: :hypno:
I envy you if you have not made the mistakes i have. I almost didn’t make it to God - I got so angry at him once that i almost refused to serve him - Logic told me that he had not made my problems (long story)…

I’ve just been feeling lately that the church demands these rigid things for me

I understand the feeling. But if you only knew what the rigidity of the Chruch was meant to save you from. Again, you probably have not doen the same foolish things i have… things i would NOT have done if i had been taught the Catholic faith as i know it today.

I need the following questions answered, which I ask as an eighteen year old.

To be holy, it is it wrong dress in the latest style? Or should I be dressing simple always?

Frankly, yes, if you mean styles that show cleavage and other “erotic” parts of the body…

Is it wrong to listen to the latest music? Should I only be listening to religious musics?

It is not wrong to listen to any kind of music unless that music glorifies things that are sinful (fornication, misogyny, violence, etc.). Also, even too much listening to wordly music that has a good message can be spiritually draining. I have learned the hard way that things can get me down without me even realizing it…

Is it wrong to spend one’s money on ipods, video games, or go to the movies?

If you love those things more than spending time with God (His Son), then they are wrong… but once in awhile, there is probably nothing wrong with it as long as it doesn’t, as aforementioned, glorify ungodly things…

Is it wrong to eat out at nice places?

It is wrong if you love doing that more than spending time with God and those who love God. “For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world but lose his soul?”

Should I be praying instead of going to the movies or eating out? Also, should I spend all of my extra money helping others instead?

I sometimes don’t feel like helping others… at times like those, i ask God, “whi is this?” and he shows me things… He shows me that maybe i need to do different things. There are a million things a person can do to help others. If you don’t feel led to do one particulr thing, maybe that isn’t your thing… what God would prefer you do. He knows your experiences, talents, inclinations, etc… He wouldn’t ask you to get involved w/ work that causes you to feel… bad. On the other hand, we can’t just say No to every possible charitable endeavor just becaue there is something about it we don’t like. Nothing is perfect in this world. If we could find perfect here below, we would never desire to leave this world. God does not want us getting too attached to this world. A lot of the saints deliberately made their lives miserable (put ashes on their food, etc.) so that they wouldn’t start loving the things of this world too much. I used to think that was weird, but the older i get the more i understand it (though, as of yet, i don’t do it myself ).

Am I supposed to be a priest?

I can’t help you here. I am still trying to figure out what God wants for me as far as a vocation. For all i know i am in disobedience because… i wait for a clear answer from Heaven when none has been forthcoming… Once, when i asked what God wanted, i heard Marriage in my head… but i am not married yet and feel i never will be (nor do i necessarily want to be). so i just tell myself to chill out and accept my life (more or les) as is. As they say in AA: “Let go and let God”. He knows we are human, weak and often confused about Him… We are told to become like little children. Children just accept things and trust their father (if he is a good one…).

, I agree with Catholic principles. I also allot time to pray every morning and night, and the rosary with my family. I also read the mass readings every day. Should I do more to be perfect, to be a saint? I feel like I can’t do it, it’s like either God wants me to hold to these restricting standards, and if that’s the case I can’t take this religion.

i know how you feel. I sometimes feel i can’t either. But i don’t think it is the Church tht is restricting you (or me). I mean, the Church is there to show you (us) the way and provide help… When i have prayed about my own choice of vocation (which i hope is not mine but God’s), i seem to be hearing (long story how) that i am to partake of the Sacraments, stay faithful to Christ and the rest is no big deal. If he would “tell” me that, i suppose that is good advice for anyone. It makes sense… Nothing else can be counted on, nothing else is predictable… Only Christ and His Church.
Praying for you. Please pray for me. Pray that the devil goes back to Hell and stays there.
God bless…

 

[Gabrielis]

Other than those questions, I agree with Catholic principles. I also allot time to pray every morning and night, and the rosary with my family. I also read the mass readings every day. Should I do more to be perfect, to be a saint? I feel like I can’t do it, it’s like either God wants me to hold to these restricting standards, and if that’s the case I can’t take this religion.

You are right, you can’t do it. But God can. If we can save ourselves, why would we need a Savior?

Catholicism is not supposed to be a set of rules, of “restricting standards.” The standards we are asked to meet are not meant to restrict us but to free us. The Pharisees in Jesus’ time were very good about making rules for people to follow, rules that were almost impossible for them to keep. They thought that following these rules would get them to Heaven. Jesus didn’t get along with them too well, as you know, because He didn’t like the way they laid all these heavy burdens on others. Instead He called people to follow Him because, as He put it, “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” But He also said that those who would be His disciples must take up their cross daily and follow Him, to die to themselves so as to live to Him. So though His yoke is easy and His burden light, it remains a yoke and a burden. But it is a yoke and burden that frees us from that much worse yoke and burden that the world imposes upon us, which is the burden of sin and death because of our slavery to sin. If the Son frees you, you will be free indeed.

It sounds to me like what you may need is a group of Catholic young people your own age who will give you the emotional and spiritual support to help you to live your Catholic faith. Many parishes have youth groups or young adult groups. Do some research to find one in your area that is orthodox. Also, like Martha in the Gospels you seem to be concerned about many things. But the one necessary thing is to keep your eyes on Jesus, to contemplate Him in prayer. Your focus should not be on becoming a saint so much as it should be to become a disciple of Jesus, without Whom you or anyone else can do nothing: “If the Lord does not build the house, in vain do the builders labor.”

Don’t concern yourself too much about accomplishing all the things on your list. As Blessed Mother Teresa said, “God does not ask me to be successful, but to be faithful.” If you do this, you will become a saint in due time. But it will be God who makes you one, in His time, not yours.

Your part is simply to remain faithful and not let yourself be overwhelmed. If you seek first the Kingdom of God, all else will be added.

Hang in there. Don’t give up.

Hope this helps. May the peace of Christ dwell in your heart.

O hope of every contrite heart, O joy of all the meek;
To those who fall, how kind thou art! How good to those who seek!
But what to those who find? Ah, this no tongue nor pen can show;
The love of Jesus, what it is None but His loved ones know.
   --- St. Bernard of Clairvaux: "Jesus the Very Thought of Thee."