What Prevents Non Catholic Spouse from RCIA

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I’ve been with my Catholic wife for nearly 15 years now, and have 3 great boys.

Honestly, I personally just have no interest in converting. As a baptized Christian who grew up never missing church, I guess I’m not interested in enrolling in 7months worth of classes that will cover much of the basics I already know.

Also, at her church I’ve heard and read some pretty bad things about non-Catholics and as a non-Catholic I’m not really welcome there. I guess i never really felt interested in converting to a religion that has constantly looked down on me or doesn’t want me (us) as part of their parish life.

If anything it’s starting to push us both out.

But like Steve up ahead said. I attend most of the time with my family to show support and be part of the family unit. I haven’t gone in a while as our youngest is at an age where he doesn’t sit still, so I mainly just stay home with him.
 
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It’s a shame you are treated so. I’m sure you know this, but RCIA doesn’t have to last 7 months. Your priest can tailor a program that suits your knowledge/needs. If it’s any consolation, as a former Baptist we looked down on Catholics, so I’m seeing both sides now. I will pray your acceptance at the church will improve. If not, perhaps a different parish would be more welcoming. Best to you.
 
The Husband is a Protestant. Three things prevent him from converting.
  1. Mary.
  2. The Real Presence. He doesn’t believe in it.
  3. Rules. He does not, for example, want to be bound to weekly Mass attendance.
 
I’m with Steve and you, I attend when required by family situations, acting politely, no communion.
I’m not Catholic, so attending RCIA would be a flat out lie and a waste of everyone’s time, bc I have no intention of converting.
Basically, I’m operating under a don’t ask-don’t tell policy, and leave it at that. (If you approached me about RCIA classes and didn’t back off at a smiling ”Thank you but no thank you”, I would indeed explain. At length. And that’s really not helpful to anyone)

I will say, though, that I’m watching the situation in Germany closely, bc I do believe the RCC has a valid Eucharist, share the belief in the Real Presence etc, so it’d simplify things to just attend one mass. Apart from that convinience, nope.
 
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TC3033 said:
As a baptized Christian who grew up never missing church, I guess I’m not interested in enrolling in 7months worth of classes that will cover much of the basics I already know.
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When I converted in the nineties, my situation was similar to yours. I was a baptized Christian and I was reasonably well informed. I’d read one or two classics such as Augustine’s Confessions. I never went to RCIA. I had three, I think, face-to-face sessions with the priest, each lasting about half an hour to an hour. He appointed my wife as my sponsor and within about three months, as I recall, I had my First Communion.
 
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I think for most it’s that there is simply no interest in converting. We’ve been married 42 years. During that time there have been periods when my husband attended Mass with me almost every week, even being a member of our choir for a couple of years. He did mention converting a few times after his parents died but that didn’t go anywhere.

We don’t have any formal RCIA in our parish and have only had a handful of converts in the last 20 years. The last, 3 years ago, was prepared entirely by the Pastor and we knew nothing of his journey until the day he was received into full communion. Prior to that it we had one around 2008.
 
I’m Lutheran from a clerical family back to the 1500s, and my inlaws are (sensible) Catholics. We get along just fine, but if a triumphalist outsider would push me rl we’d be seeing the rerun of the Reformation.
Bring popcorn.
The fireworks may be spectacular.

Don’t ask don’t tell makes sense in this context. 😬

Edit: Nordics are more polite than the proverbial Canadians, but the Viking heritage is just under the surface. If you don’t want a fight, don’t push. Or ”just bc the fuse is long doesn’t mean it’s a single dynamite stick”
 
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I don’t know the logistics of RCIA but wonder if it’s something some struggle to commit to because of work commitments.

Other than that many Christians I know are happy with being Christian and don’t feel any need to commit to a denomination.
 
I really appreciate all of the responses. Everyone - thank you for your honesty.
 
Not criticizing the process, but perhaps it contributes. It is a huge commitment on the part of the participants and the catechists, as well as the Priest and ultimately the Bishop.
 
My wife is struggling with the decision currently, she was raised Southern Baptist and I think her biggest “issue” is that her entire family is Southern Baptist. That’s part of her identity. So, the emotional aspect must be considered as well. Sometimes she wants to go through RCIA, sometimes she doesn’t. Only time will tell if she does. I believe she will because she wants to share the faith that her children will be raised in
 
Ya, I don’t see him making any exceptions for anyone, he’s one that has said some stuff about NC’s that’s been kind of jaw dropping.

I think we’re going to be moving on to a different parish. We’ve had a few “last straw” moments in the last couple weeks.
 
Sorry I can’t multi quote in one post…I’m on my phone. I don’t think this priest in particular would be one to cut RCIA short for anyone basing on some of the comments he’s had for/about NCs.

He noted in one of his letters…I think the Sunday after Easter…his surprise that nobody was received into the church this year at Easter.
 
TC3033 said:
some of the comments he’s had for/about NCs.
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“NCs”? New converts?
A couple of years after my conversion, I found out – quite by chance – that the priest is himself a convert. He was brought up in a Spiritualist family. He never mentioned that to me in the course of our talks, and I never heard him mention it in a homily. But I suppose it must have made a difference to his outlook.
 
I was Baptist until two years ago. My elderly parents are not at all happy with my decision - my mom made the comment, “anything but Catholic.” Prayers.
 
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