What to do if your parents causes you to sin?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Molly1981
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
M

Molly1981

Guest
Hi.
The bible says (Matthew 5:30) that …if your right hand causes you to sin cut it off… What happens if ‘‘your right hand’’ happens to be your own parents? What do you do? And they simply want you to serve them as a slave and never get educated or married and isolates you from everyone and at the same time tell everyone iincluding the priest you are bad just to ensure you never cry for help.
Its a sin cause you can never be whom God created you to be. What can one do about that?
 
You have to do what your parents say as long as they are making REASONABLE requests with God’s Will. Isolating you from everyone does not sound reasonable.
 
MaeganFlinchum1 said:
You have to do what your parents say as long as they are making REASONABLE requests with God’s Will.
Click to expand...
I’d qualify that further: And only if you are a minor child under their authority (you didn’t say how old you are). If you are considered an adult where you live, then you may decide for yourself. You may choose to listen to your parents’ advice and you should always treat them with respect, but the final decision how to live your life rests with you.
 
“What is reasonable?” And what are the sins? Without knowing more of the facts how can we say that she must do as her parents say. It is hard to comment or give an opinion because there is info left out here. I would have to know more as to what the sins are or why she thinks she is enslaved to her parents at the age of about 23 or so.
 
Molly1981 said:
Hi.
The bible says (Matthew 5:30) that …if your right hand causes you to sin cut it off… What happens if ‘‘your right hand’’ happens to be your own parents? What do you do? And they simply want you to serve them as a slave and never get educated or married and isolates you from everyone and at the same time tell everyone iincluding the priest you are bad just to ensure you never cry for help.
Its a sin cause you can never be whom God created you to be. What can one do about that?
Click to expand...
Molly,
If you are an adult, then you do not have to obey yoir parents in the same aay that you do when you are a child, and changing your relationship with them is not sinful in and of itself. The Church teaches that parents are not to interfere with major decisions their children make, nor pester their children at any age to cause their children to sin.

What little you descibe does indicate a problem, and I think your best choice would be to discuss this with a priest, possibly in confession.
 
Sorry dear friends for the lack of info. I was hurrying to Mass then.
To make this as brief as possible, it is a case of extreme emotional, psychological and verbal abuse. The painful thing is both parents are involved and succeeded in biasing my bro. (6 years younger) against me. He is a graduate now and once supported me and my sis greatly. (I’m in my late 30s unofficially, now in early 30s officially. Last year, my parents almost tricked me into having a change in age to 23, a document I already had was my only saving grace for dodging that trap even though they insisted- to delay me from getting married). My younger sis (in her late 20s) and I bear this same crosses. We are extremely intelligent yet forced out of school many times. Career changes [from would have been parents wish for medical career to biochemistry (both of us were amongst the top 6 in the dept, GPAs 3.48 and my sis 3.42), same in computer sci with the highest of grades]. Left before final year, faced extreme levels of bullying and results being manipulated by bullies with access to lecturers. Yet, our parents cursed us when we pleaded we needed to go to school. We were not allowed to see any priest cause they would laugh at us, my mom said so. No friends, don’t date, e.t.c We stay home 24/7. My mom hates doing chores, that was why she cursed and told us our going to school would cause us so much suffering till we run back home, and run back we always did. We recently figured it out that she and my dad were behind it all. My dad needs his meals and laundry done, so he supports her. A priest told us recently to leave. The sin I talked about was asking God why He brought us to life to torment us so. Yet I do have some really good unbelievable spiritual encounter with answers to prayers like asking Our Lady Star of the Sea to send away flood threathening to come near our home (I’ll try to get a blog up and info the full details). But the sufferings we go through are so horrible and prayers regarding this case go unanswered. They knw without an education, no job and we can’t leave. But we knw of some good jobs around. They hate saving and like giving cash to those who don’t need it. Now they are telling everyone we are dull and couldn’t graduate. Whenever we had good decisions, they always forced their own opinion on us. Extreme obedience to our parents was our biggest undoing. We know the hell we wld face, hence we didn’t tell our parish priest.
This is the first time I’m coming out and unafraid and not ashamed to talk about this in public and reaching out for help cause I know many are crying in silence like we once did, some other people committed suicide. Yet I’m curious to see what good God is going to generate from our horrible experiences. Thanks for read my ‘‘briefly long’’ story, lol.
 
I’m not ruling out demonic possessions since we lived in many environs in the past with lots of hateful blasphemous fetish neighbours, collegues and students, especially very jealous students and parents of some kids who weren’t progressing in life. No matter how much love and help we gave, it was a case of, they don’t want to see us even alive. It was raw horror. I still wonder and wonder how we survived many attacks on those unbelievable crazy journies. I appreciate all advice being given, thanks. For once in my life, i’m being cared for, it feels strange because I loved and gave till I was worn out and now needing help. Many we helped betrayed us back then and still mock us to this day. I’m thankful to you all, if we knew of this forum earlier on, we would hv sought for help but I doubt it cause we were scared to death that people would find this hard to believe. I managed to believe with difficulty my own pains. I hope other victims of abuse will find help and caring friends too. Thanks a lot!
 
Molly, I don’t think you are required to do what your parents want in this case. From what you have written, it seems they are abusing you verbally and mentally. I am with the priest on this one. If it is possible, you should leave. It seems to me that your parents are using you, and are in no way acting in your best interests.

When I told my priest about my mother and sister guilt tripping me for refusing to attend my sister’s softball tournament to go to Mass, Father surprisingly said, “I think she was just using you. You did the right thing.” God is our number one priority. If your parents are keeping you home and refusing to allow you to live normal lives and have access to a priest, it seems to me that their plans have nothing to do with God. Follow the advice of your priest and leave if you can. God does not require obedience if it damages our faith.

You are also an adult, and your decisions are your own. Your parents are no longer responsible for you. They may be angry all they like if you leave, but as an adult, you have the right to leave your parents house.
 
classica87 said:
Molly, I don’t think you are required to do what your parents want in this case. From what you have written, it seems they are abusing you verbally and mentally. I am with the priest on this one. If it is possible, you should leave. It seems to me that your parents are using you, and are in no way acting in your best interests.

When I told my priest about my mother and sister guilt tripping me for refusing to attend my sister’s softball tournament to go to Mass, Father surprisingly said, “I think she was just using you. You did the right thing.” God is our number one priority. If your parents are keeping you home and refusing to allow you to live normal lives and have access to a priest, it seems to me that their plans have nothing to do with God. Follow the advice of your priest and leave if you can. God does not require obedience if it damages our faith.

You are also an adult, and your decisions are your own. Your parents are no longer responsible for you. They may be angry all they like if you leave, but as an adult, you have the right to leave your parents house.
Click to expand...
I know dear but I’ll have to wait for them to give us money. They still await their entitlements when others have already received theirs. I’ll have to lie against my will and tell them I’m going to town A but I’ll face town Z. There’s this demon monitoring ability which I pray Our Lord and Our Lady will get rid of from them. In the past whenever we were in a place happy especially with access to regular Mass attending opportunities, we would get a call from them to leave there at once, immediately we obeyed, we ended up living amongst fornicators, thieves and liars. Those people seemed to have come straight from the pits of hell, you needed to hear their blasphemies and tales of evil. They couldn’t stand us and we couldn’t understand why we were so much hated by strangers with strenght to talk rubbish from dusk to dawn daily.
 
Molly1981 said:
I know dear but I’ll have to wait for them to give us money. They still await their entitlements when others have already received theirs.
Click to expand...
I will be praying for you. Just know that you do not need to feel guilty at all. Pray, and if possible find a priest to speak with. Follow the Holy Spirit. You’ll be fine.

God bless!
 
I admit I am in a hurry and didnt read the last few responses yet… But I didn’t see yet where you have sinned… I do have sympathy of course… But just asking god why he put you in situation you are in is not a sin… Even Jesus asked why he was forsaken… And honoring your parents doesn’t mean doing everything they say and ask of you… That not honor that’s slavery
 
classica87 said:
I will be praying for you. Just know that you do not need to feel guilty at all. Pray, and if possible find a priest to speak with. Follow the Holy Spirit. You’ll be fine.

God bless!
Click to expand...
Thanks so much for your prayers, we need it a lot. We hope to go to a Benedictine Monastery in a nearby City (on arrival of the money) for more counselling and prayers. If my sis wasn’t a witness to all our experiences, i’d almost believe I was insane. Thanks and God bless you too.
 
Mkb617 said:
I admit I am in a hurry and didnt read the last few responses yet… But I didn’t see yet where you have sinned… I do have sympathy of course… But just asking god why he put you in situation you are in is not a sin… Even Jesus asked why he was forsaken… And honoring your parents doesn’t mean doing everything they say and ask of you… That not honor that’s slavery
Click to expand...
You are right, its slavery. Our parents kinda act/react strangely whenever we talk of going to Mass. We are not allowed to participate in church activities but they can. Hmm. I feel some relief from speaking about this. Thanks.
 
Molly,
Your brother knows nothing about all this? He would 't believe you two if you told him what was happening?

Anyway, yes, I would say discuss this with a priest so you and your sister can make a plan to leave. I really hope that you and she would be able to continue your educations, but I have no idea how things work in your country. The priest may have ideas about this as well.

And once you leave, don’t look back! Givven what you have said, I would print out this or somethig else you write about your experiences and read it before you even talk with your parents. You sound like you really want to do the right thing and maybe that is why you fall back into your parents’ clutches.

One or both of you should go as soon as possible to talk with a priest or anyone else who can help you.

I will pray for you two.
 
St_Francis said:
Molly,
Your brother knows nothing about all this? He would 't believe you two if you told him what was happening?

Anyway, yes, I would say discuss this with a priest so you and your sister can make a plan to leave. I really hope that you and she would be able to continue your educations, but I have no idea how things work in your country. The priest may have ideas about this as well.

And once you leave, don’t look back! Givven what you have said, I would print out this or somethig else you write about your experiences and read it before you even talk with your parents. You sound like you really want to do the right thing and maybe that is why you fall back into your parents’ clutches.

One or both of you should go as soon as possible to talk with a priest or anyone else who can help you.

I will pray for you two.
Click to expand...
Thanks, we intend to go to a Benedictine Monastery.
My younger bro did suffer along in the past and stongly supported us but being far away at study and hearing battalions of complaints from us (I admit I do have a temper and use angry words) must hv put too much pressure on him. Please keep him in your prayers especially since his once loving gf turned manipulative and lied we treated her badly on phone. Meanwhile, we never talked. You see how more problems that we didn’t bargain for arose. This girl drove away all my bros loving friends too. She is gradually isolating him from everyone he loves. Please join us to beg God for more mercy.
We planned to leave without turning back. How it breaks my heart to see things in movies happening to us for real.
Thanks for your prayers and God bless you and yours 🙂
 
Re: asking God why He created you, earlier in the thread –

Actually, that’s not a sin. You might want to read the Book of Job – God is very understanding about those who plead to know why they suffer. He may not answer now, but He has bad things to say about those who insist on forcing easy answers on people like Job.

Admittedly, it’s better to ask Him when you’re not mad at Him, but He won’t get mad at you for asking for wisdom and explanations!

Good luck on getting out of a bad situation. He is the God of Exodus, and He will bring you out of Egypt.
 
Mintaka said:
Re: asking God why He created you, earlier in the thread –

Actually, that’s not a sin. You might want to read the Book of Job – God is very understanding about those who plead to know why they suffer. He may not answer now, but He has bad things to say about those who insist on forcing easy answers on people like Job.

Admittedly, it’s better to ask Him when you’re not mad at Him, but He won’t get mad at you for asking for wisdom and explanations!

Good luck on getting out of a bad situation. He is the God of Exodus, and He will bring you out of Egypt.
Click to expand...
Now that you mentioned Job, I remember my bro telling me so many a time that there was a possibility that God did some sort of boasting to satan about us like He did in the case of Job, hence the numerous attacks. My sis agreed but I don’t see anything special about us. I like simple things in life. You won’t believe it that in the last university we attended, in the crazy compound we lived then, the students said God couldn’t stop them from attacking us. The part you would find shocking is, on leaving for 6 a.m. Mass, we heard one of them make a phone call, we didn’t hear what was said but we felt something was wrong. In the not so dark street, a white car waited and trailed behind us. As soon as we boarded a bike (its a means of transportation in my Country), the car increased its speed. I was sitting behind my sis on the bike and turned to see the full speed and headlights of the car about to hit the bike. I quickly made the sign of the cross and asked St. Michael to help. I saw the car veer off the road like some force hit it from the side (St.Michael’s handwork, I think), it moved sideways and zoomed so fast past us but that speed couldn’t have been the driver because St. Michael must have handled the steering wheels. My sis and the bike rider asked who could be driving so violently at such early hours with the road empty. I told my sis what happened before Mass started. When we got back to the compound, it was dead silent. We still didn’t think anything was amiss, till we found out the master bully was involved in an accident, his members called us all sorts of names and banged on the door accusing us of hurting their boss and of avoiding the accident they meant for us. After that incident, I called my bro on phone and we agreed that I and my sis had to go to day time Masses only, so as to avoid a repeat attempt at us. Strange things do happen, but in a way it led us to join this wonderful forum and I’m thankful to God.
Thanks for your prayers too :).
 
Molly…you write " A priest told us recently to leave."

Trust in Jesus and He will see you through.

My prayers for you!
 
Molly - It sounds to me that your mother/parents? have emotional/psychological problems and that these are ‘naturally’ impacting upon your own emotional health.

Be aware of what is likely going on, and try to limit as a result the impact it is having on you. Pray for them.

ps. Stress can also be a cause of driving errors. {I know - I’ve been there myself.]
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top