What to do?

  • Thread starter Thread starter bekalc
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
B

bekalc

Guest
I’m taking RCIA classes. But right now I’m kind of getting frustrated. I’m seminary trained, techincally two papers away from a Masters in Theology, which hopefully I’ll get. So, Its really frustrating going through this basic class… What’s more frustrating is right now I’m the only person in the class. So, I’m kind of wondering why they are going so slow. I mean I really don’t need a beginner’s class on grace. I learned all about grace, I even read the Council of Trent’s teachings on grace. Maybe I’ll learn something new but after having to spend a whole hour listening to a lecture on buildings; I’m a big frustrated.
I felt like I was being talked to like a young child. Not a person who has been through two and half years of Seminary!
What would you guys suggest I do? I don’t want to be rude and ungrateful. Besides while I’m pretty sure Catholicism is True. I’m still in a period where I do get a few tiny lingering doubts once in awhile. I’m currently reading a book on my own to help me through those doubts. The doubts are more like can the Catholic church really use me? What about all I studied. And then there is a bit of the Mary stumbling block. Did I really hear from God on this…
 
How very odd. Who is teaching this class anyway? If you are the only one in the class, it should be tailored to your needs, not some generic syllabus. Maybe you could speak to the pastor if the instructor isn’t amenable to this idea (assuming the instructor isn’t the pastor in the first place). Otherwise, perhaps a different parish.
 
You are the only person in the class. Is your sponsor or the instructors aware of your background? Is it possible to engage the instructors in conversation, or ask lots of questions? Can you say, “I was taught such and such in seminary, is that what Catholics believe too?”

If you maintain a humble heart, and see this as an opportunity to offer up your sufferings (impatience), it could turn out to be evern better than you expected.

Welcome.
 
We have had a couple similar persons (ex- protestant ministers). They are usually handeled by a priest.
 
Yes, it is the priest of the parish. And thats what’s frustrating me. I really don’t want to be rude, and I would be more understanding if there was someone else in the class. Most of my extended family is Catholic, and I attended a Catholic high school for two years. So there’s a lot he’s saying that I’ve heard before.

It’s just really frusting because its a lecture, and so its not even conversational. Its just me, the priest and the deacon. I did learn that this parish is pretty orthodox which is why I’m somewhat reluctant to leave. But I’m really frustated because I’ve been a Christian (mature one for 6 years) and I attended an accredited seminary for two and half years, so I have a really good understanding of the basics theologically. I’m afraid that I’m really not going to be looking foward to this class and that’s a shame. Because I normally love Bible studies etc.

I’m just really scared next time that Its going to be just me again and I’m going to have to hear another lecture like this one. Where there is no discussion, no anything! I don’t think right now I really need to be confirmed right away, I’d like maybe a month or two of instruction. But, I really wish we could talk about the issues that are really concerning me, seeing as that I already basically no the basics, and I’m currently the only one attending. It’s a Catholic neighborhood.

I think it probably doesn’t help that I’m a very young looking 25 and maybe they don’t take me seriously because I was a former Pentecostal or whatever. But its frustrating. I’m not a new Christian; I’m just a Christian seeking to enter into communion with Rome. Their really is a difference.
 
Maybe you can speak with the deacon and suggest to him about approaching the priest in possibly giving you a more tailored RCIA classes. Explain your situation, then maybe have them give you just the important points. If you have any questions, they can then be available for that.

If he objections, he probably has a reason for it - find out why, then settle in your heart that this is how you’ll be going through RCIA for now.

Just my :twocents:
 
We had the same problem. Hubby does not have the qualifications you do, but researched Catholicism thoroughly before joining RCIA. We then had to sit through the most basic, mundane stuff. They required us to attend the early morning mass (as you can tell by my posts, we are not morning people), then hubby HAD to leave part-way through mass. We go to church together as a family and hubby wanted me together with him during the RCIA stuff, so none of us liked this set-up. The DRE didn’t care at all. We started skipping the first half of mass and getting to church just in time for the RCIA session, then going to mass later in the day. You know, I hear of how much stronger people’s faiths grow by sponsoring someone through RCIA, but I can tell you that we took little to nothing positive away from the experience. However, the role of sponsor (separated from the RCIA rigmarole) was great.

What it boiled down to for us: hubby wanted to join the church and this is what he had to go through in order to do so, so we coped as best we could.

You are in such a better position, though, being the only one!! Can’t you just interrupt the priest and pontificate on the subject at hand, do a little name dropping, and show you really know your stuff, then say, “I understand the church’s position on grace, that… (historical explanation), but what I am still really struggling with is____________. Can you tell me ____________________?” Should politely steer the conversation in the right direction while also assuring the priest that you do really actually know what he wants to tell you.
 
Perhaps you can take this as a lesson in humility. While we sometimes think we know it all, we can always learn from others. It might be just one little gem or story that you take away from the session. Don’t go into it with an “I already know all this” attitude. Go into it as “Lord, You are leading me into Your Church; this is part of the requirement, so there must be a reason for me being here. I trust You and ask You to help me grow in grace and humility during this time. Help me to be patient and loving in all my encounters. Help me to see You in this priest and deacon, and realize it is You teaching me through them. Open my heart, open my eyes, open my ears.”
 
Didi. I wasn’t going in the class with I already know this. I was actually looking forward to the class. It was after the class when I got upset because it just involved one hour of listening to a lecture. He really didn’t leave room for questions. It’s frustrating because then I’m thinking I’m going to be stuck with this till April?

I’m realizing that its just the step I’m going to have to go through, all I want is for the class to go deeper. It’s precisely because I realize that I could learn things from those guys that I want the class to go deeper.
 
I recommend taking a different approach to your class. Try approaching the class with humility, patience and obedience. Between classes, try focusing your studies on those virtues as relating to the Catholic faith.
 
Bekalc, every Priests have different strengths. Your education probably warrants one whose charism is heavy on apologetics and/or theology. However, this Priest’s strength lies somewhere else.

My advice is for you to trust that the Holy Spirit has give you the one that you really NEED. While the Priest is giving you the basics, pray and reflect on what else the Holy Spirit wants you to learn from this Priest. My suspicion when it is over you will realize that being Catholic isn’t just about what you know intellectually. Over time, if you concede that RCIA won’t be a great intellectual learning experience, you will discover the charism of this Priest and it will enhance your faith. You already intellectually know much. Before you go to your next class read the account in 1 Kings 19 where God was found in a whisper. 😃
 
Maybe I’m obtuse, okay, sure I am, but if you have 2.5 years in seminary and you’re not Catholic, obviously it wasn’t a Catholic seminary, so why do you think you already know the Catholic basics? I mean how do you know you already know it all?

Sounds like a really rough lesson coming in humility and obedience, and I sure don’t envy you that, but maybe just approach it as the suffering before the sunlight…and maybe just request that they delve a bit deeper or come right out and ask them why the basic instruction if you think you’re already past that point.

Penitent
 
If he gives an hour long lecture to just you, it seems like you two aren’t on the same wavelength. I would suggest talking with him–one of two times.

You could come early and talk right before RCIA is to begin. Pro: less dum-dum-dum kind of pressure. You know he will be there and be available. Con: he’ll already have the lesson planned for the day and you will catch him off-guard. He won’t have time to plan anything else.

Or you could meet with him during the week. Pro: It gives him time to formulate a new plan. Con: It might cause a bit more pressure.

I would go into the conversation with the understanding that as the only one, the classes can be tailored to your needs, while also recognizing that there are basics you will need to assure the priest you actually do understand and accept. Perhaps he already knows the lesson plan of each week and can tell you the topic, and then you can tell him what you already know and what you would like to discuss. If you know it all, you could come up with something related. For instance: you know all there is to know about Holy Orders (next week’s topic). What you would like to discuss is the experiences of the clergy, what the inside scoop on the priest shortage is, and speaking of priests…also the priests’ usage of the vernacular or Latin and the Trindentine mass as a whole. Or perhaps you would like a comparison of eastern and western priests. Or to discuss this decentralization that the Catholic news keeps talking about to allow many more local decisions (including who should be bishop). Or maybe there is a historical aspect of it you want to discuss. I can’t imagine that once assured of the fact that you do know what he plans to say that this priest would make you want to sit through it anyway when he is given concrete alternatives that satisfy both your needs and allow you to grow in your faith.
 
40.png
Madia:
I recommend taking a different approach to your class. Try approaching the class with humility, patience and obedience. Between classes, try focusing your studies on those virtues as relating to the Catholic faith.
Click to expand...
I concur. I had a B. A. in Bible and religious education when I went into RCIA, but I just went as a learner, not for the theology (which in my class was sadly lacking) but to absorb the Catholic world view and culture. Those last two things are the hardest to reconcile ourselves with as former Protestants, which is why we have such difficulties with Marian devotion and other such devotions and practices.

And, you can always come here with your questions and concerns because we are here to help you in any way we can in your journey into the Church.

God bless!
 
I think I did have a pretty bad attitude. I’ll try to be a little more understanding. I realize that what I mainly have to get an understanding of is the Catholic world view. The reason I’m saying that I know a lot is because I also attended Catholic school, and I did a lot of research before I ever considered to become Catholic.

I guess your right its not going to be an intellectual experience and perhaps since next week won’t be about what’s going on in the Catholic world, maybe there will be more room for questions and discussions. Perhaps what is also making me a bit comfortable is having it only be me right now in the class. Besides if I want an intellectual experience I can always do some reading on my own. I can’t expect it to be like my class.
 
Dear bekalc!

Hail and Well Met. 🙂

Well now, it takes all kinds, eh? * good-natured chuckle *

I come from the opposite direction to you. Being a cradle Catholic raised by a mother who’s published articles for years in a scholarly magazine called “Homiletic and Pastoral Review,” and voraciously reading anything Catholic I could possibly get my hands on from little on up … what I’ve always been looking for is fellowship with enthusiastic people I can talk about spirituality with on an intellectual level.

So … one year, I joined RCIA at my parish as a volunteer to help minister to potential converts. However, I very quickly left the group. Why? Because real or imagined, I got the feeling that the newcomers to the Church were giving me strange looks that I interpreted as, I was making them feel uncomfortable because I happened to know more than they did. Well, the last thing I wanted was to intimidate a potential new Catholic by my presence.

Now then … if you had been sitting at my table at RCIA the way it was run by my parish, I have the feeling that we would have gotten along real well. 👍

~~ the phoenix
 
Dear Phoenix,
So … one year, I joined RCIA at my parish as a volunteer to help minister to potential converts. However, I very quickly left the group. Why? Because real or imagined, I got the feeling that the newcomers to the Church were giving me strange looks that I interpreted as, I was making them feel uncomfortable because I happened to know more than they did. Well, the last thing I wanted was to intimidate a potential new Catholic by my presence.
Click to expand...
Before I read your message, I happened to watch EWTN earlier this morning, where Bob and Penny Lord presented details on the life of St. Philip Neri. What spoke powerfully to me was the fact that he was persecuted from jealousy of those in the priesthood. His suffering from this was so severe, that he prayed, “God, I can’t take it any more.” God answered, “I will enable you to bear it.”

How often we see this vice throughout the lives of the saints, and I would guess it flows from Jesus’s warning that if they persecuted the Master of the House (Jesus), they will also persecute the servants. Witness in the Acts of the Apostles that extreme animosity and persecution was solely due to jealousy. We learn in Mt. 27:18 that “he knew that they had delivered Him up out of envy!”

Certainly, Jesus did not have an attitude of superiority, nor did many of His saints and servants throughout the ages. There is just something wrong in the heart and spirit of those who feel threatened when they deem that another is more advanced than themselves. It causes us extreme suffering, and may well cause our death, like Jesus, St. Stephen, and a host of others. Yet if we turn the tables on the offender and offer our sufferings for their sanctification, it can not only make us a saint, but possibly open their eyes to the dangerous path they walk.

Most important, we need to ask the Lord to show us if their is a hidden satisfaction within us that others detect and become repelled by it. Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto Thine.

Carole
 
P. S., Phoenix …
I’ve always been looking for is fellowship with enthusiastic people I can talk about spirituality with on an intellectual level.
Click to expand...
:clapping: Write me anytime, dear friend in Christ - I would love to talk with you!

Carole
 
I think part of the problem is that I just moved back home. I had been in college for four years, and than in another state. I really don’t have any friends here, and I don’t know anyone. All of my good Christian friends are elsewhere. I was talking to my professor about this, and he basically said Rebecca you need to really find some fellowship.

So, this whole being Catholic thing. 1. Right now I don’t think I’m ready to be confirmed. Partly because I worry that I was just theologically confused. I mean I’m pretty sure, and right now there’s no way I could go back to Protestant, but I’m also glad that I’m going to have some time to really sort this out. I know that the idea that I’m having time to sort this out, makes my mother happy and my friends back in the other town.

However, I also feel kind of a bit at a ‘no mans land’ too. Because I really need fellowship, and that’s the hard part if I was going to be Protestant. I wouldn’t have to go through all these steps. I could just get involved and well meet people. So, after talking to my professor, I decided that I’m going to talk to the priest about these things. And basically say, where can I meet people who are Christians that are my own age. Because I’m not sure I can handle being “no mans land” until April either.

Perhaps that’s why this whole RCIA thing is bothering me. Because I really did my research. And while I have some questions and I’m glad to have the class, what I’m really hungering right now is for some fellowship. It’s really hard to get fellowship when its just you, the priest, and the deacon. And the priest is lecturing you!
 
Dear Rebecca,

:bigyikes: You are a woman! I think many of us formed the picture of a man studying to becoming a minister when you spoke about being “seminary trained.” I think I can guess where some of your priest’s caution and reserve toward you is coming from.

Fellowship is very important, a basic need of the human heart. When I moved to a new neighborhood many years ago, I was very lonely – so much so, that I begged God to guide me. The thought He gave me was, “Do unto others what you want them to do to you.” Translation: if I want them to befriend me, this is what I ought to do to others.

Rather than wait for somebody to reach out to me, I broke my shyness and began to open up to invite others into my life. One lady in particular, I invited to join a bowling league with me, after we had become friends through a rather simple beginning of inviting her out for coffee after church.

The only problem was finding somebody with whom I could share the Lord. I joined a bible-study group in another parish, and we all became very close - somewhat like the little band of apostles. Search the local church bulletins and diocesan newspapers for activities that might interest you in other parishes, and try them out. Travel today makes it so accessible to partake in those things that interest us.

May you be blessed with many new friends with whom you can be one mind, one heart! For this we pray, O Lord! Amen!

Carole
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top