Hi Greylorn,
wow, thanks for that, you’ve certainly had quite a journey. Thanks for sharing it with me. Just say if this is overstepping the mark, but could I ask what it was that convinced you that your views couldn’t be correct?
There were a number of items involved in convincing me that my beliefs were wrong. They began with logical contradictions between the nature and behavior of God. But there were two big items:
- Why did God create man, especially knowing the outcome?
Of particular trouble for me was the issue of why God created ordinary people, those who have little mind or motivation beyond physical and emotional gratification, those who don’t, or cannot read— the kind of people who watch TV sitcoms with embedded laugh tracks to tell them which lame bits of dialogue are “funny.”
- The First Law of Thermodynamics, which states that energy cannot be created or destroyed. It was clearly contradictory to the concept of an omnipotent God Who created the universe from nothing.
- (Incidentally, this same law of physics subsequently led me to a God-concept which made sense in the context of physics.)
Also would you say that you have always been open to modifying/updating your beliefs or is this something which happened after that point in your life?
Interesting question. Before realizing that my beliefs were wrong, I was absolutely dogmatic and defended my Catholic teachings at every opportunity. Even then I was reluctant to leave the Church, and spent five years trying to reconcile my new understanding with Catholicism before making a permanent break.
My first admission of error was the most difficult. Later admissions became progressively easier. The process is like being heartbroken, and becomes easier with practice. But the human ego is a powerful machine, and getting rid of the brain’s “
I’m right” mechanisms is difficult.
I was assisted by a career path in computer programming, in which every day I was corrected by a simple machine which does what amounts to counting rapidly on two fingers.
Working in astronomy was also helpful. The mean lifetime of an accurate college astronomy textbook is about one month, and as a result, astronomers tend to be less dogmatic about their beliefs than other scientists. However they are excellent at critical thinking, which is the only tool a human mind has for understanding what it and the surrounding universe are, and why.
I’ve never learned to like being wrong, or heartbroken. But one gets over these feelings. I would rather be in the position of having been wrong, than still being wrong.
If you are personally struggling with beliefs, I’m happy to share my experiences with a view to making your struggles easier than mine.