What's the craziest Anti-Catholic whopper you've ever heard?

[patrick457]

I wonder if this “super computer” is a Mac or a PC? Maybe the Vatican will let me borrow it for online gaming. It might just give me the edge I need. :newidea:

You may not know it, but it could be a combination of those. After all, the Vatican is apparently in charge of every multibillion-dollar company in the world…

And come on! We all know that Bill Gates may hide something dark and nasty, but did you see Apple Inc.'s logo? Doesn’t it just remind you of something dark and nasty as well?

 

[Justin1982]

He said this “booklet” proved that the popes really worshiped the Egyptian Sun god and not the God of the Bible because it showed a picture of the hat’s that were worn by “Ra’s” priest during their religious ceremonies and the Catholic popes wore this same hat.

So, I guess by that logic someone who wears a baseball hat is a baseball player too.

 

[daughterofgrace]

Was asked this on campus this year.:

Do Catholics believe that Jesus died for their sins?

I didn’t know to laugh or to cry.

Also, when students discuss their religious backgrounds, they’ll often reply that they are Christians after we announce we are Catholic. Our answer?: So are we.

Guess that’s South Alabama for you.

 

[Zooey]

My favorite is that the Jesuits assassinated Abraham Lincoln.:whacky:
(And why is it always the Jesuits, anyhow? I have never heard any conspiracy stories about the Franciscans or the Dominicans…)

Hmm, maybe he read Babylon Mystery Religion by Ralph Woodrow. I read a copy of that a few months ago, it was hilarious, some of the most ridiculous ideas I’ve ever read (actually what was almost as funny were all the little notes my pastor had written in the margins at one point).

But the whole point of the book was to prove that the Catholic Church worships all the pagan gods…I can’t remember now what they said about Ra now, probably because I was laughing every time I picked it up. It was written in the 1960’s I believe, but I was unaware that anyone could rival Jack Chick in craziness.

What is interesting about this, is that Woodrow has done a complete turn-around, and there is an article he wrote, over on the CA homesite, in which he tells how he came to realize that he had been too trusting in the books that he read, before writing this…and he has withdrawn it from further publication. Yet, some people still believe that it is true.

 

[sulkow82]

You may not know it, but it could be a combination of those. After all, the Vatican is apparently in charge of every multibillion-dollar company in the world…

So, is that how the Vatican financed starting up the Islamic faith?

 

[Santi2]

There is a lady at work who always engaged me with anti-Catholic whoppers however, whenever and wherever she came across them. One that really floored me was: “You Catholics killed Jesus because you are descendants of the Romans in the Bible.” and “You’re not Christian, you’re Catholic.” She also thinks we’re cannibals.

 

[lutherlic]

My favorite is that the Jesuits assassinated Abraham Lincoln.:whacky:
(And why is it always the Jesuits, anyhow? I have never heard any conspiracy stories about the Franciscans or the Dominicans…)

The Franciscans and Dominicans do the deep undercover work. Their operatives are rarely exposed, but when they are, their identities are protected via mind control. In related news:

What is interesting about this, is that Woodrow has done a complete turn-around, and there is an article he wrote, over on the CA homesite, in which he tells how he came to realize that he had been too trusting in the books that he read, before writing this…and he has withdrawn it from further publication. Yet, some people still believe that it is true.

The Dominicans got to him, imprinted new “facts” on his mind and suppressed his free will.

((this is such a fun thread!))

 

[kimaz]

What is interesting about this, is that Woodrow has done a complete turn-around, and there is an article he wrote, over on the CA homesite, in which he tells how he came to realize that he had been too trusting in the books that he read, before writing this…and he has withdrawn it from further publication. Yet, some people still believe that it is true.

That is interesting, good to know that someone who could write that far off the deep end can come to his senses.

lutherlic:

The Dominicans got to him, imprinted new “facts” on his mind and suppressed his free will.

Of course this a feasible possibility as well.

 

[judechild]

The most outrageous “anti-catholic whopper” I’ve ever seen happened recently.

I was going to walk my friend home (he just turned 14 years old) like I usually do. When I got there, though, I saw he was very dirty and bruised up all over. Apparently, some anti-catholic-church-going kid tried to convert him, and when persuasion didn’t work, he beat him up. My friend walks with a permenant limp and is generally unhealthy; he couldn’t defend himself.

That’s the more horrible piece of anti-catholicism I’ve ever seen.

 

[Santi2]

The most outrageous “anti-catholic whopper” I’ve ever seen happened recently.

I was going to walk my friend home (he just turned 14 years old) like I usually do. When I got there, though, I saw he was very dirty and bruised up all over. Apparently, some anti-catholic-church-going kid tried to convert him, and when persuasion didn’t work, he beat him up. My friend walks with a permenant limp and is generally unhealthy; he couldn’t defend himself.

That’s the more horrible piece of anti-catholicism I’ve ever seen.

I am so, so sorry. Yes, the thuggery against your friend would be one of the most horrible anti-Catholicism ever.

 

[Ne_OrangeKnight]

She also thinks we’re cannibals.

At least she’s going for one of the true classics; charges of cannibalism and incest have been leveled at Christians since Roman times. Because, you know, we eat Jesus’s flesh and drink His blood every week.

And incest, because we’re all brothers and sisters, and yet we still marry each other.

Sam, the Neon Orange Knight

 

[Santi2]

And incest, because we’re all brothers and sisters, and yet we still marry each other.

Sam, the Neon Orange Knight

Never heard of that one!!!

 

[mark_a]

But the idea that the Church either tortured Galileo or played any role whatsoever in his (natural) death, much less tortured him to death, is so outrageous as to cross the line into gut-clenchingly funny.

At least, I thought so.

Along with the fact that he put his daughter in a convent.

 

[mark_a]

I was on a “mission” in Mexico with my protestant friend’s church (mea maxima culpa) and the last day we were there they grilled me about the church. I wasn’t really swayed by any of it, but I couldn’t shoot back any arguments (there were nine of them and one of me).

Typical bully behavior.

 

[maximus]

The craziest one I heard was that in Jamaica a Protestant sect claimed that Catholics sacrificed and ate little baby children.

 

[Roy5]

Over 100 years ago a certain Fr. Chiniquy, a former priest who became a Protestant evangelist (I believe in Canada?), wrote a book or pamphlet claiming that the assassination of Lincoln was a papal plot. There was no truth to this charge at all.

Chiniquy also wrote that Booth and co-conspirators were Maryland Catholics who met at a Catholic Mass to work out details on their plan to kill the President.

 Obviously the first part was totally false. Does anyone know if the second part is also patently false?

 

[Marc_Anthony]

Here’s one:

Several years ago I overheard two women sitting near me having a discussion about Catholics. They asked such questions like, “Are Catholics Christians?”. What made me amazed was when the consensus reached was, “No, of course not.” This made me kind of mad, and I said, “Excuse me, but what are you talking about? Catholics are the FIRST Christians. Every other Church split off from ours.” Then they preceded to tell me how rude I was for butting into their conversation, which had nothing to do with me. I responded with, “I’M Catholic,” to which they replied, “So?” as if that gave them the right to decide on the truth of things that like, weren’t true…I mean really, what if I were having a discussion with a friends about how women weren’t really humans, but a seperate subspecies, and we both agreed this was true? THEN I’m sure they would have had no problem “butting in”…

 

[Farsight001]

What is interesting about this, is that Woodrow has done a complete turn-around, and there is an article he wrote, over on the CA homesite, in which he tells how he came to realize that he had been too trusting in the books that he read, before writing this…and he has withdrawn it from further publication. Yet, some people still believe that it is true.

I’ve seen more than one person claim that he retracted the original in a selfish attempt to make money, or because the Church threatened to kill him and his family if he did not, which I find particularly astounding. Why can’t it just be that he had the integrity to admit he was wrong?

Some of my favorites I’ve heard is that Islam was started by the Jesuits, which is more amusing than the slightly more popular claim that Islam was started by the Catholic Church because the Jesuits came about centuries after Islam, whereas at least the Catholic Church as a whole precedes it.

Another I heard is that 67 million American Catholics have been the victims of sex abuse at the hands of priests, this from a news article. I’m assuming the article retracted the statement, but too late, damage done - as I have seen it repeated more than once elsewhere. Technically this is possible, but it would mean that only 3 million American Catholics have NOT been abused and that if spread evenly, every Catholic priest in the U.S. would be personally responsible for abusing about 670 children each. Who in their right mind concludes that this is a reasonable statistic?

And last, and most of all my favorite is when people claim an amount of people killed during the Spanish inquisition that is greater than the entire population of Spain at the time. I have heard as high as 200 million.

Ooh. Just remembered the false knights of columbus oath too. People often claim that it is of course authentic because it is in the Library of Congress. This boggles my mind. What kind of library do they have near their house? Is there no fiction section in it?

 

[maximus]

Here’s one:

Several years ago I overheard two women sitting near me having a discussion about Catholics. They asked such questions like, “Are Catholics Christians?”. What made me amazed was when the consensus reached was, “No, of course not.” This made me kind of mad, and I said, “Excuse me, but what are you talking about? Catholics are the FIRST Christians. Every other Church split off from ours.” Then they preceded to tell me how rude I was for butting into their conversation, which had nothing to do with me. I responded with, “I’M Catholic,” to which they replied, “So?” as if that gave them the right to decide on the truth of things that like, weren’t true…I mean really, what if I were having a discussion with a friends about how women weren’t really humans, but a seperate subspecies, and we both agreed this was true? THEN I’m sure they would have had no problem “butting in”…

Interesting run-in with the “Chickettes”:whacky: , you did well:clapping: . It is amazing the amount of energy some anti-Catholic groups spend on spewing garbage and just down right vicious gossip. A good rule of thumb if a denomination frequently spends valuable time demonizing others is time to move on. Same with people you may contract for work around the house, if they speak ill of their competition or former employer it’s a red flag.

On a side note, a friend had an interesting story on how he became Catholic. He had a person from one of these radical anti-Catholic groups trying to bring him on board. He mentioned that the individual could only explain his faith in terms of how it opposed Catholicism and not present a clear definition of his denomination theology. He figured after all this the that probably going Catholic was the best way to go, once he investigated Catholicism he found his faith home.

 

[Zooey]

Over 100 years ago a certain Fr. Chiniquy, a former priest who became a Protestant evangelist (I believe in Canada?), wrote a book or pamphlet claiming that the assassination of Lincoln was a papal plot. There was no truth to this charge at all.

Chiniquy also wrote that Booth and co-conspirators were Maryland Catholics who met at a Catholic Mass to work out details on their plan to kill the President.

Obviously the first part was totally false. Does anyone know if the second part is also patently false?

Booth was, to the best of my knowledge, Anglican. (This may be an assumption on my part, but I seem to recall that, at least, he came from an Anglican family).
They met at Mary Suratt’s boarding house. Mrs Suratt was executed for allowing them to meet there…despite the fact that there was never any proof that she had any idea what they were talking about, except in snippits when she delivered more coffee.
Certainly, they were NOT a group of Maryland Catholics. Nor any other kind of Catholic group.
Chinquy was almost certainly a random crazy, on a par with the people who think that there are :shrug:demonic codes in old Beatles recordings (but only if played backwards).