When are my thoughts mortal sin?

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Can I just ask… is thinking about sex a mortal sin? I had thought it was but I’ve been reading some things on here that make me wonder.
Also, I’m never sure at what point I’ve really ‘consented’ to the thought… I know you can’t help it if things just pop into your head, and I don’t indulge in any extended fantasising or anything, but sometimes it’s hard to say NO instantly to a thought like that. Does anyone know what I’m getting at? 🤷 It’s like, it can take a few seconds before I really say NO & say a short prayer or just distract myself.
I’m not trying to split hairs here it’s just sometimes it’s relevant to whether I can receive communion or not if I haven’t had a chance to go to confession. Sometimes I think ‘it wasn’t really a mortal sin’ but there’s enough of a doubt in my mind that I decide not to go up for communion (which in itself I find a tad embarrassing 😊 ). And I don’t want to deny myself the eucharist unnecessarily.
I suppose I understand the theory of this but find it hard to judge in my specific situation. Any advice? :o Thanks
 
it becomes mortal when you think of sex in order to excite yourself, the longer you indulge in it, the more it comes closer to a mortal sin.

thinking about sex is not wrong, but when you are doing it disorderly for the purpose of arousing yourself, then it is surely sinful.
 
Ohh, ok, I’ve not really been that bad then! Thanks, that’s good to know 👍
 
I’ve been struggling with this myself… but not on thoughts of sex. But when I came across this post it occured to me, I COULD be committing mortal sin. I’ve been struggling with a situation that happened at my parish awhile back ago. My Spiritual Director strongly suggested I remain at the parish and “deal” with the humility. I struggle with thoughts of justice & yes maybe DEEP down - vengence? - maybe. Anyway…I find myself thinking of the situation and in particular this person that has caused me hurt and harm and others that are struggling. BUT this person goes untouched. I try to pull my thoughts into the directions that God is the judge and allows all to happen. This is hard to explain w/o going into all the details… but when I find myself thinking like this, could it be mortal sin?
 
Hi, 1HOLYAPOSTOLIC 👋

I really don’t think that the kind of thoughts you describe are mortal sins. You aren’t setting out to do/ think something that is offensive to God, all that is happening (it seems to me) is you’re struggling with anger & resentment over something that happened to you. The way I see it (and as far as I know I’m in line with the Church here), is that as long as you’re doing your best not to ‘indulge’ the thoughts, you’re not falling into mortal sin if they pop into your mind occasionally, and if, despite your efforts to deal with your anger, you haven’t achieved ‘perfect’ forgiveness yet.

Also I didn’t even know that having angry thoughts was even a mortal sin (although obviously they’re not good)? I’m not so sure on that one, maybe we should try to find out.

Just pray for God to help you with this, and don’t worry too much about it 🙂 (that’s my advice anyway)

Here’s a little webpage on forgiveness that I found quite helpful

frpat.com/resentments.htm
 
The challenge becomes defining whether one has truly given full consent to the thought. Sin is in the will not the thought. I suppose if you sat down and deliberately took a field trip down the road of lustful thoughts one might stray into an area of grave sin; however, if one has a passing fantasy and lets it pass, I would struggle with defining that as mortally sinful.
 
I’m a little new here so I’m not sure who I’m replying back to. LOL. I think it got me into some trouble of a different forum.
Blueskies - thank you for the website - IT WAS VERY HELPFUL!!

I have been struggling with forgiveness and when I TRULY think I have forgiven and have let go, something happens and deep down I know the pain is still there. And it grows. It isn’t just that particular person, it is the parish/diocese that lets allows this happen. I have grown though (i guees). I was niave in thinking when you serve God… (for HIS glory) you will always serve Him. Now I have found out that isn’t true… politics is EVERYWHERE.
 
I’m a little new here so I’m not sure who I’m replying back to. LOL. I think it got me into some trouble of a different forum.
Blueskies - thank you for the website - IT WAS VERY HELPFUL!!

I have been struggling with forgiveness and when I TRULY think I have forgiven and have let go, something happens and deep down I know the pain is still there. And it grows. It isn’t just that particular person, it is the parish/diocese that lets allows this happen (not just to me, I’m sure to others as well). I have grown though (i guess). I was niave in thinking when you serve God… (for HIS glory) you will always serve Him. Now I have found out that isn’t true… politics is EVERYWHERE. My Spiritual Director reminds me there are other ways of serving God - oh but they joy I had in what I was doing & I know I was blessed. I got more back than I gave. But what I **wasn’t **going to give the kids was watered down doctrine - maybe that was the problem. And if that is the case - so be it.
 
Hi 1HOLYAPOSTOLIC 🙂

Glad if I could help. Although I’ve not been in the situation you’re in, I do know just what you mean in that it’s especially disappointing when Christians, very involved with the church behave in an unChristlike way, especially with petty political-type stuff… it’s just discouraging… I hope you can make peace (or at least in your own heart) with the people who are doing this & try not to judge them too harshly… The other thing is that, maybe it’s really not good for you to have to spend too much time with people who are like this? I know it’s your parish & I’m not advocating abandoning it but it seems to me it might help you to limit contact with them so you aren’t ‘bugged’ all the time about it, distracted from your prayers or whatever? Just a thought 🤷
But maybe alternatively you could find a way to ‘reach out’ to the people who have upset you, by being extra-nice, suggesting going for a coffee or something, offering your help with something they may need a hand with. These can be very good ways of diffusing situations without necessarily involving any confrontation, that in my experience help so much with the resentment etc… Maybe that would help you. Again, it’s just an idea 🙂
 
blue_skies said:
Can I just ask… is thinking about sex a mortal sin? I had thought it was but I’ve been reading some things on here that make me wonder.
Also, I’m never sure at what point I’ve really ‘consented’ to the thought… I know you can’t help it if things just pop into your head, and I don’t indulge in any extended fantasising or anything, but sometimes it’s hard to say NO instantly to a thought like that. Does anyone know what I’m getting at? 🤷 It’s like, it can take a few seconds before I really say NO & say a short prayer or just distract myself.
I’m not trying to split hairs here it’s just sometimes it’s relevant to whether I can receive communion or not if I haven’t had a chance to go to confession. Sometimes I think ‘it wasn’t really a mortal sin’ but there’s enough of a doubt in my mind that I decide not to go up for communion (which in itself I find a tad embarrassing 😊 ). And I don’t want to deny myself the eucharist unnecessarily.
I suppose I understand the theory of this but find it hard to judge in my specific situation. Any advice? :o Thanks
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We’re human. As such, we’re prone to think all sorts of sinful thoughts. We must try to curb such thinking, and definitely never act on it. God understands. Our fallen nature exercises a constant influence on what we say, think and do. Transcending it through Christ is a moment-by-moment struggle we must all enjoin.
 
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