When do you stop helping the homeless?

[ThinkingSapien]

In walking around the streets of Atlanta I have found that it isn’t hard to encounter a homeless person. But I’ve also found it’s not hard to find people pretending to be homeless out to exploit the kindness of strangers by either using a story to get cash for non-essential purposes (ex: alcohol or cigarettes). To avoid exploitation and for reasons of my own safety I’m electing to nolonger respond to request for money/food for people that I meet on the street and just stick with contributing to charitible organizations.

I was wondering ig any one else had any thoughts on this; have you ever found it necessary to make a policy against helping some one that may be in need.

 

[adrift]

For the reasons you list, I too only give to organizations where there is accountability.

If I know the situation, I will help. In one area, I have gotten to know the people. One was offered a job but he wouldn’t take it because his begging was more profitable. We have signs here also that says not to give to beggars because it doesn’t help them.

 

[Maria1993]

If you buy a homeless person a sandwhich, there is no wrong in that. I get the money thing. But if they were REALLY in need they would take food.

 

[Luna_Lovecraft]

…have you ever found it necessary to make a policy against helping some one that may be in need.

Me? No. If I have something to give to someone who asks, they get it. Change, food, a bottle of water, the occasional bag of dog food for their pooch, they get it if it’s mine to give.

I have a home. I have a modicum of financial security. I don’t have any addictions, and my mental illness extends to an anxiety disorder that doesn’t keep me from living a typical, middle-class life. I have a husband who’d take care of me if I became disabled, and I’ve got stepdaughters who’ll probably stand by me when I’m old and feeble. In this respect I’m far, far more fortunate than those who sleep rough and approach strangers day in and day out for their daily bread. I’m 51 years old, and forking over spare change as well as buying sandwiches and sodas and dog food hasn’t diminished my or my family’s lives so far, so I figure I’ll keep doing it until I can’t anymore.

Luna

 

[wondrousgnat]

The Methodist church three doors away from our house shelters homeless. Last night we brought them food. And the day before we brought some food to the food pantry at the Catholic church. But we never give directly to the homeless except on one ocassion when we bought a man a sandwich (we did not give him the money).

 

[ThinkingSapien]

If I know the situation, I will help. In one area, I have gotten to know the people.

Likewise. Though there are some people that I have gotten to know that I won’t help because I’ve found their problems stem from a refusal to avoid actions that cause the problem (like a friend with what I would summarize as a shopping addiction that had problems with being behind on bills).

I think I liked giving much more when I actually felt like it was making a positive difference in one’s life and I was ignorant of the exploitive intents of some. Now at times I feel that it is a dice roll.

. We have signs here also that says not to give to beggars because it doesn’t help them.

Pan-handling is illegal in this area and has been for a few years. So instead of sitting against a building asking for change the tendency is to walk the street and try to start conversations with people. There are shelters that will feed some. Though any one of the shelters has a limit on the number of people admitted during the night.

I actually feel a little bad. I just yelled for some one to go away only a few moments ago. I realized I neglected to get cash to pay for parking before I left home (you pay when you depart the lot) so I had to go to an ATM. I did a minimum withdraw since I’m not comfortable at open ATMs. A homeless guy that frequents this area started to approach me to ask for money. Chances are that he was probably of no real threat to me. But the scenario of some one entering into “my space” while I am using an ATM is a perceived threat to me. And this perception is magnified by what at times seems like weekly attempted assults on GA Tech students in the area for theft.

If you buy a homeless person a sandwhich, there is no wrong in that. I get the money thing. But if they were REALLY in need they would take food.

I’ve tried that. I’ve said “I won’t give you money, but I will purchase food for you.” The offer has been accepted. Some times it works. Other times I’ve seen the food thrown away right after the person thought I was outside of visual range.

I just don’t like feeling exploited or that I’ve paid for good food to go to complete waste.

…]I’m 51 years old, and forking over spare change as well as buying sandwiches and sodas and dog food hasn’t diminished my or my family’s lives so far, so I figure I’ll keep doing it until I can’t anymore…]

Ah, well the only thing for which I use cash is to pay for parking. It is always in denominations of $5. So there is no spare change. Once a slot opens up for monthly parking there will be no cash at all, only electronic transfers.

 

[ThinkingSapien]

The Methodist church three doors away from our house shelters homeless. Last night we brought them food. And the day before we brought some food to the food pantry at the Catholic church. But we never give directly to the homeless except on one ocassion when we bought a man a sandwich (we did not give him the money).

Overall that sounds good, as it is compatible with the policy I’m adopting.

My sister got into some organization called “Meals on wheels.” They qualify that some one is in need (it’s usually elderly, but not limited to that) and volunteers take the food to them. It actually seems to satisfy the social needs of some as from what my sister has told me some of the people on her route don’t get a lot of social interaction and are otherwise isolated.

 

[Luna_Lovecraft]

Ah, well the only thing for which I use cash is to pay for parking. It is always in denominations of $5. So there is no spare change. Once a slot opens up for monthly parking there will be no cash at all, only electronic transfers.

I typically don’t have much cash money on me, too. Because of my work situation I keep my wallet locked up in my car, which is less likely to get stolen in the parking lot than me pick pocketed (yes, my working conditions are “interesting”). But if I have cash money it’s usually small denominations or bits of loose change. I can always get more of both. People who ask me for it may not.

The way I look at it is this - Christ is in all of us. The homeless man who lives behind the strip mall down the street from my condo, the unmedicated schizophrenic guy who walks up and down my street all day talking to the air, the shaggy guy with the little shaggy dog and homemade cross who shouts the Good News every morning at the intersection, and the mom with the two hungry little girls who appeared on my doorstep three Sundays ago, when they ask me for kibble or baloney sandwiches or bus fare or money, that’s like Christ asking me for those things. So if I’ve got it, I give it. And when I give it, I assume it’s going to be used for the good.

Don’t get me wrong, I also tithe and donate to my church’s food pantry. I’m not so irresponsible that I’d fall behind on my mortgage because I’ve given away my entire paycheck or let my stepdaughters go hungry because I’ve given away everything in the refrigerator. But I’m not going to fall into financial ruin buying some bags of dog food when I’m at the pet store, and the money I’ve handed out this month just means I won’t go to the movies again until June. I’ll survive.

Another thing to consider is the human contact that all of us need that the marginalized don’t get nearly enough of. I think the smile and the touch and the polite exchange of words that occur when we give money or things to individuals counts for a lot, for both the giver and the recipient, spiritually and emotionally. It might even be the most important thing you give. I think Rev. Maurice Chase, who died late last year, understood this very well.

Luna

 

[ThinkingSapien]

I typically don’t have much cash money on me, too. Because of my work situation I keep my wallet locked up in my car, which is less likely to get stolen in the parking lot than me pick pocketed (yes, my working conditions are “interesting”).

Sounds interesting indeed. I couldn’t do that as I’d have concerns for my car still being there when I get back (I’ve had a car stolen before) and being unable to produce a government issued ID when requested by an officer is an offense for which one can be arrested. So I keep my wallet on me.

Don’t get me wrong, I also tithe and donate to my church’s food pantry. I’m not so irresponsible that I’d fall behind on my mortgage because I’ve given away my entire paycheck or let my stepdaughters go hungry because I’ve given away everything in the refrigerator. But I’m not going to fall into financial ruin buying some bags of dog food when I’m at the pet store, and the money I’ve handed out this month just means I won’t go to the movies again until June. I’ll survive.

I’m not in danger of financial ruin, but there seem to be an endless supply of people asking for things. Some people have fallen on bad times, some seem to have continually damaging behaviour, some are in parasitic relationships (which is really bad because if you try to help the person they hand the resources over to their parasite). It’s hard to distinguish one from another at a distance.

 

[PrayHarder]

Lived in San Francisco for a while and ran into similar issues. If I had left over food from a restaurant, I would give it to a homeless person. However, I don’t give money to homeless people out of the assumption they would spend it on vices. But I do give donations to charities, food banks, and other organizations that help the poor. I think charitable donations to organziations with good track records is a good way to help the homeless.

 

[tonyrey]

In India I used to offer bananas to beggars - which were sometimes rejected! Those who accepted them gratefully were truly desperate…

 

[Credo_in_Deum]

In India I used to offer bananas to beggars - which were sometimes rejected! Those who accepted them gratefully were truly desperate…

I personally wouldn’t be quick to make such a judgment regarding those in need. There are a lot of people who poison food and some people may be allergic to certain foods so IMHO homeless people have every right to be cautious of what they eat and what they don’t eat.

I personally give orginizations and individual homeless people money and pray they both will do the right thing with it.

 

[chataranga]

Even if we’ve adopted a “policy” of some sort to not help the homeless for one reason or another there are so many folks in the world that need help and money isn’t the only way. My wife and I deliver meals on wheels and yes some of these folks don’t get much human interaction so it’s tough sometimes to tell them we need to be moving along. We also put some extra to the grocery bill when the local supermarket is asking for money to assist the food pantry etc. all we do is ask them to add 2-5 extra dollars to the bill. Sometimes we have given money directly to someone on the street. My view is that if they use it to buy booze,drugs,sex, or whatever vice the may have that is them creating bad karma on themselves and does nothing to diminish the good karma I’ve created or tried to create for me. My wife and I have a "“policy” of not donating to large well known organizations because of the graft and misuse we’ve heard of over the years. We also don’t appreciate the annual solicitations for more cash. We try to keep it local as often as possible. Maybe donating canned goods to the local church etc. I’ve also donated blood for decades and the only thing that costs me is “time-talents-and treasures” without the use of money other than what it costs to get to the site and back. Someone doesn’t need to be homeless to be in need. If you need a policy to help certain individuals then look about and maybe you’ll see someone else that you would feel more comfortable helping. Just a thought-Blessings.

 

[Rhubarb]

Does the situation of the person you are giving diminish the fact that you are sacrificing of yourself for another? Does loving charity know only certain definitions of needy?

Obviously I’m asking these rhetorically. But I think a kind action or generous example can have an impact on many people in many ways, not just the person getting a few dimes. When tuition allows, I try to keep a few bucks on me in cash wherever I go for just this reason.

 

[mackbrislawn]

In walking around the streets of Atlanta I have found that it isn’t hard to encounter a homeless person. But I’ve also found it’s not hard to find people pretending to be homeless out to exploit the kindness of strangers by either using a story to get cash for non-essential purposes (ex: alcohol or cigarettes). To avoid exploitation and for reasons of my own safety I’m electing to nolonger respond to request for money/food for people that I meet on the street and just stick with contributing to charitible organizations.

I was wondering ig any one else had any thoughts on this; have you ever found it necessary to make a policy against helping some one that may be in need.

If they ask for money to buy an alcoholic beverage, I give it to them. If they say it is for their starving wife and kids, I know they are BS’ing and don’t give it to them.

 

[57Bill]

We have a group from several protestant churches put on an open free breakfast and offer bicycle repair and give away bicycles when we have them. Sometimes we find out a bike was sold for drugs or booze or whatever. They don’t get another bike.

We have gotten a few out from under their “tarps”.

At first you take it personally when a bike is sold for drugs (yes I am the bike guy) but how can we not refuse to serve? Of course we cannot help everyone the way we want to or think we know what is best for them. Many are stuck in there way of life, does that mean we abandon them?

Food, clothes, bikes, prayers and other assistance is what we do.

Those who serve can grow in the fruits of the Spirit.

If you have felt threatened by panhandlers or had something bad happen, then I do understand, but we can’t throw up our hands. Maybe find out what shelter or services are in that neighbor hood and give them money directly? Just a thought.

 

[TheTrueCentrist]

In walking around the streets of Atlanta I have found that it isn’t hard to encounter a homeless person. But I’ve also found it’s not hard to find people pretending to be homeless out to exploit the kindness of strangers by either using a story to get cash for non-essential purposes (ex: alcohol or cigarettes). To avoid exploitation and for reasons of my own safety I’m electing to nolonger respond to request for money/food for people that I meet on the street and just stick with contributing to charitible organizations.

I was wondering ig any one else had any thoughts on this; have you ever found it necessary to make a policy against helping some one that may be in need.

Only help people who deserve it

–Jesus

Seriously though, the idea that handouts make people lazy seems entirely contrary to what was preached in the gospels. So much so that it has its own parodies, such as a series of comics which talk about “supply side Jesus.”

 

[tonyrey]

–Jesus

Seriously though, the idea that handouts make people lazy seems entirely contrary to what was preached in the gospels. So much so that it has its own parodies, such as a series of comics which talk about “supply side Jesus.”

It’s a good excuse to be miserly!

 

[tonyrey]

We have a group from several protestant churches put on an open free breakfast and offer bicycle repair and give away bicycles when we have them. Sometimes we find out a bike was sold for drugs or booze or whatever. They don’t get another bike.

We have gotten a few out from under their “tarps”.

At first you take it personally when a bike is sold for drugs (yes I am the bike guy) but how can we not refuse to serve? Of course we cannot help everyone the way we want to or think we know what is best for them. Many are stuck in there way of life, does that mean we abandon them?

Food, clothes, bikes, prayers and other assistance is what we do.

Those who serve can grow in the fruits of the Spirit.

If you have felt threatened by panhandlers or had something bad happen, then I do understand, but we can’t throw up our hands. Maybe find out what shelter or services are in that neighbor hood and give them money directly? Just a thought.

There are always excuses for not helping others! You’re less likely to get into trouble when you lie low and do nothing. There is an element of risk in doing anything - and the more worthwhile it is the greater the risk (as proved by Jesus).

 

[ThinkingSapien]

Does the situation of the person you are giving diminish the fact that you are sacrificing of yourself for another?

If it were a single occasional person I could deal with it more easily. If it were a group of people that were known to need help I could deal with that more easily. But it’s a perceivably unlimited supply of people that present claims of the need for assistance; and some of my more recent past experiences have shown that many of the claims are misrepresentations.

Given that I’ve got limited disposible resources (can’t help every one) I’ve decided to both stick with charity through organizations or with helping some people that I know need help by way of known contacts (ex: a friend of a friend that has had no success in finding a job). I had been asking around to people that are familiar with this area of Atlanta (from living there, working there, or attending school there). The consistent advice I’m getting is to keep moving, keep earphones in, don’t speak, don’t make eye contact, don’t let any one see if you have any cash, try to look like you are having a bad day and travel in a group when possible. The advice sounds kind of rude and contrary to the more sociable rules of the environments that I am used to. But now that I am in this environment and have been followed a few times I can see how that behaviour strategy came about.

Does loving charity know only certain definitions of needy?

I’m not sure what this means.

Obviously I’m asking these rhetorically. But I think a kind action or generous example can have an impact on many people in many ways, not just the person getting a few dimes. When tuition allows, I try to keep a few bucks on me in cash wherever I go for just this reason.

That strategy worked fine for me when I was in school. It would actually work fine where I live and for other areas that I frequent. It doesn’t seem to work so well for the MidTown Atlanta area.