at what point in a relationship is it appropriate to be naked in front of your girlfriend/boyfriend. i would assume marriage…but what about engaged couples? non engage couples?
not as an object of sexual desire or lust, but as a level of comfortableness.
thanks for the help on this one guys
From JAW642 on 08/07/2010
First of all, I would like to point out that the Catholic Church does not regard human nakedness or nudity, per se, in and of itself, as shameful or sinful.
Pope John Paul II wrote:
“The human body can remain nude and uncovered and preserve intact its splendor and its beauty… Nakedness as such is not to be equated with physical shamelessness… Immodesty is present only when nakedness plays a negative role with regard to the value of the person…The human body is not in itself shameful … Shamelessness (just like shame and modesty) is a function of the interior of a person.”
Based on this statement alone, one can easily conclude that a boy & girl couple do not have to wait until their wedding night to see each other naked. They simply have to refrain against any illicit sexual activity, the same as they should do, if they were to remain fully dressed.
The natural curiosity of any young couple has always been the wonder of seeing what the other person looks like without any clothes on. I think this curiosity is much stronger in males, because we are so visually oriented. I believe also that males have a much easier time in allowing themselves to be seen naked, because we don’t usually have the same body esteem issues that the girls normally have.
The Original Poster, thememphisman, is approximately 20 years old, and he is in a three year committed relationship. As he has already pointed out in his original post, his reasons or intentions for wanting to share his nakedness with his girlfriend, is not for sexual desire and lust, but rather to increase a level of comfortableness between him and his girlfriend. This is extremely important in reducing the odds of a wedding night that could possibly be a total disaster, due to any premature ejaculation on his part.
As for being an occasion of sin, being naked in front of each other cannot be an occasion of sin for them, if they have never done this. It can only become an occasion of sin for them, after the experience has led them into serious sexual sin in the past. They are not required to keep from doing something morally neutral, simply because of the possibility that it might lead a seriously sinful act. Otherwise, it could be said that simply dating a girl is an occasion of sin, which is certainly NOT true.
If they usually do not engage in serious sexual acts, and if they are reasonably confident that they just want to share their nakedness to become more comfortable with each other, to increase their honesty and trust in each other, and to strengthen the bonds of love between them, then their nakedness should not be at all shameful or sinful.
His girlfriend at this time may not be ready to expose her body to him, and she should not be coerced to do this. However, she may still be willing to allow him to expose his entire body to her.
Their intentions and motivations should remain wholesome and morally good or at least morally neutral, without the intention of offending God by committing serious sexual sin.
Only the original poster and his girlfriend can decide for themselves, if being naked in front of each other, or one being naked in front of the other, is a morally good or morally neutral act, in the sight of God.
From JAW642 on 08/07/2010
Keeping that secret is tuff and tempting, but it’s such a huge part of the gift you get to give to your husband/wife.
When you look on the naked body of this woman you love and are physically attracted to, how “comfortable” will you be with the sexual desire you’ll have to fight off? How “comfortable” will you be when you FAIL and commit fornication? Recall what Joseph did in regards to Mrs. Potiphar: fffffled from her (even leaving his coat behind). Flee from temptation! You are not made of stone; you’re flesh and blood. Live always heedful of your weakness.
