J
jalflower
Guest
My daughter has been in a marriage for 6 yrs now, and they have a 3 yr. old son. She and her husband have been having difficulties since the first month of marriage when she found out that he had been seeing another woman up until the week before their wedding. He did not tell her, she found out from someone else via a text message. She confronted him and he did not deny it. He apologized but she was extremely hurt. One year later she conceived their child and after he was born, her husband started acting very strange and she realized that he was involved in drugs again. This had been a problem before they had met. She confronted him again and he denied it, but she saw texts on his phone where he was buying drugs. She also noticed money being drawn from their account each week that he had no answer for.
They had a big discussion about it and he said he would stop. He has also lost all respect for her. He does not stay home with them hardly ever. He finds reasons to leave. He will go hunting for the whole weekend, or go visit friends at night. Now he started coaching ball and is gone every evening. Sometimes he stays overnight and uses excuses that his truck broke down, etc, not to come home.
He is constantly telling her that she is the blame for his actions and that she is a bad wife. He verbally abuses her in front of their 3 yr old son. A month ago he went in the room and got his gun and told her he was going to kill himself and kept the gun to his head while she begged him not to do it. He made her leave the room and he slept on the sofa with the gun. I don’t think their son saw this, but he saw him with the gun the next morning.
He has played many mind games with her and blames everything on her. I know that marriage is a two way street, and I am not saying she is perfect, but she has been home with their son every night, she works all day, as does he, and she is with him alone almost every weekend. When she does ask him to watch the child for her to go run errands for an hour or two, he gets furious and calls her 2-3 times to find out when she is coming home.
She has asked him repeatedly to go to counceling, but he refuses and tells her she has the problem not him.
They were not going to church but recently they started going. I don’t know if he is still going or not.
She is a bundle of nerves all the time and asks me what she should do. I recommend counceling, but she says she can’t afford to go. She wants me to tell her if she should get a divorce, and I feel that she should, but I don’t want to be the one to make that decision. I have tried to tell her to trust God and pray to him for answers. She doesn’t feel like she knows what God wants her to do and is very confused.
I want to help, but obviously I am not a priest. Could you give me some insight as to what to tell her? Thanks,
jalflower
They had a big discussion about it and he said he would stop. He has also lost all respect for her. He does not stay home with them hardly ever. He finds reasons to leave. He will go hunting for the whole weekend, or go visit friends at night. Now he started coaching ball and is gone every evening. Sometimes he stays overnight and uses excuses that his truck broke down, etc, not to come home.
He is constantly telling her that she is the blame for his actions and that she is a bad wife. He verbally abuses her in front of their 3 yr old son. A month ago he went in the room and got his gun and told her he was going to kill himself and kept the gun to his head while she begged him not to do it. He made her leave the room and he slept on the sofa with the gun. I don’t think their son saw this, but he saw him with the gun the next morning.
He has played many mind games with her and blames everything on her. I know that marriage is a two way street, and I am not saying she is perfect, but she has been home with their son every night, she works all day, as does he, and she is with him alone almost every weekend. When she does ask him to watch the child for her to go run errands for an hour or two, he gets furious and calls her 2-3 times to find out when she is coming home.
She has asked him repeatedly to go to counceling, but he refuses and tells her she has the problem not him.
They were not going to church but recently they started going. I don’t know if he is still going or not.
She is a bundle of nerves all the time and asks me what she should do. I recommend counceling, but she says she can’t afford to go. She wants me to tell her if she should get a divorce, and I feel that she should, but I don’t want to be the one to make that decision. I have tried to tell her to trust God and pray to him for answers. She doesn’t feel like she knows what God wants her to do and is very confused.
I want to help, but obviously I am not a priest. Could you give me some insight as to what to tell her? Thanks,
jalflower