When is praying for the dead pointless?

[Dsivanish]

How does one pray for another who has died, but we are unsure of the state of their soul? I’ve had previous friends and family members who have passed that I could somewhat confident that they died in friendship with God, but as my ex-wife has recently died I have very little confidence. I have no real way of knowing anything about how she lived after our divorce and pray for her anyway. I just don’t know if she can be helped at this point.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

It’s pointless when the dead person is beatified or canonized by the Church and therefore we believe they are in Heaven and no longer need us to pray for their soul.

If the dead person hasn’t been beatified or canonized by the Church, then prayer for their soul is never pointless.

 

[po18guy]

It is likewise useless to that person if they are in hell. But, we have no way of knowing, thus we pray for them. No prayer is ever wasted as it benefits us, being communication with God.

 

[Dan_Defender]

When in doubt, pray. No prayer is ever wasted and it is a spiritual work of mercy to pray for souls in Purgatory.

 

[esieffe]

My understanding is if you pray for someone and they are um not disposed lets just say, those prayers will be used by our Lady for someone else. Read that somewhere. As usual, I can’t remember where…

 

[fredystairs]

There are only three places that the deceased can be: heaven, hell, or purgatory. If they are in purgatory, then our prayers will help shorten their time there. If they are in heaven, then they no longer have need of our prayers and those prayers will be applied to some other soul. If they are in hell, then they are beyond our prayers and again those prayers will be applied to some other soul. As others have said in this string, no prayer goes to waste.

Pax

 

[JanR]

Praying for the dead is never pointless.

 

[otjm]

To the OP, and to the title of your thread: It becomes pointless when you are dead. Until then, not.

 

[JerryZ]

As others have pointed out unless the Church declares someone as a Saint precisely because one does not know the destination of a person he/she needs our prayers, mostly we need to pray for them because that is an act of mercy and we actually do receive benefit from it. So do it even if it is for an apparent selfish reason bu do it none the less.
Peace!

 

[JanR]

To the OP, and to the title of your thread: It becomes pointless when you are dead. Until then, not.

And when you are dead, people can pray for you – that’s never pointless, either. Even if you end up in hell, their prayers can be applied to another soul, or maybe several souls. Prayers are never wasted.

 

[Kei]

Generally, unless someone is canonized, we don’t know what has happened to that person.
So it is important to pray even for those who seemed like they’d be in Heaven, in case they need prayers.

Or if we think they’re doomed, since we don’t know. They may have repented at the last moment, or their hearts were different that we think. We aren’t God.

 

[Bluebright]

Pray for her anyway. If the prayers aren’t needed then God will direct them elsewhere. No prayer is ever wasted.
I’m sorry for your loss. Ex or not, I am sorry for your grief- complex stuff that. God bless you.

 

[Dsivanish]

For those keeping track, I still pray for her just in case she’s able to receive the blessings of it. I do have to tell her, or her memory, that I love her but to leave me alone so that I can move on. Right now I don’t enjoy listening to much music and have had to delete a lot of songs to not bring up old memories or feelings. I never expected this to happen, she hurts me every time she leaves me.