When is religion no longer worh it?

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Meggie said:
I have struggled with my faith for a long while now.
I do the “good girl” thing I go to Mass, I pray, I am in a Bible study, listen to Christian Music, surround myself with Catholic and Christian friends, have great spiritual guides and a great college spiritual group. Even happy-clappy retreats give me no spiritual high. (I tried to help kick-start my faith agian, but no luck) Silent retreats made me more flippant than ever.
No intellectual argument seemes to make sence to me. I don’t think that its a dark night of the soul becuase I’m not upset over it, I’m ready just to give it up.

I’ve been absolutely and genoursly helped by the laity of the church, however, lately I’ve been very hurt personally by some vindictive people in charge in my dioces. Other than that the church has been neutral in my life.
My parents are very faithful, and even my brother who has somewhat fallen away from the Catholic church has a very faithful heart.

I just feel like I’ve given my last. I talked to my parents who’s opinion is that that they can’t “force” me to go to church (they’ve never had to) is that I’m approacing religionwithout the want of a relationship with God. I only go to Mass as insurance against going to hell. My mom told me that at this point, with that attitude, she why I attend.

And reflecting on what she said I really don’t know.
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Who needs happy-clappy stuff or pentecostalisms? Find a Tridentine Mass in your area and experience the tradition of the Holy Church 👍
 
can’t attend most trindine b/c of the insence I’m deathly allergic the smoke no matter what I do…and honestly its little stuff like that which bugs me about religion.
 
There is always somewhere to suit your needs. You like incence? Go one place. You don’t like incence or in your case can’t be around it, go to any other parish and you don’t have to worry about incence except for Holy Thursday or at least that is the only day I remember seeing incence in a Latin Rite mass.
 
What do you find that is more “worth it” than your relationship with God? What is it that is so wonderful that you would desire it to come between you and God? I am really curious because I can think of no such thing.
 
Meggie said:
I have struggled with my faith for a long while now.
I do the “good girl” thing I go to Mass, I pray, I am in a Bible study, listen to Christian Music, surround myself with Catholic and Christian friends, have great spiritual guides and a great college spiritual group. Even happy-clappy retreats give me no spiritual high. (I tried to help kick-start my faith agian, but no luck) Silent retreats made me more flippant than ever.
No intellectual argument seemes to make sence to me. I don’t think that its a dark night of the soul becuase I’m not upset over it, I’m ready just to give it up.

I’ve been absolutely and genoursly helped by the laity of the church, however, lately I’ve been very hurt personally by some vindictive people in charge in my dioces. Other than that the church has been neutral in my life.
My parents are very faithful, and even my brother who has somewhat fallen away from the Catholic church has a very faithful heart.

I just feel like I’ve given my last. I talked to my parents who’s opinion is that that they can’t “force” me to go to church (they’ve never had to) is that I’m approacing religionwithout the want of a relationship with God. I only go to Mass as insurance against going to hell. My mom told me that at this point, with that attitude, she why I attend.

And reflecting on what she said I really don’t know.
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People come to the end of their tether for different reasons, & what one person finds the last straw may do another little harm or none.​

Going to Mass as an insurance policy is a bad reason to go: if one is to be not only alive, but to flourish as well, one needs something far more positive than merely avoiding hell. Besides, there is nothing particularly Christian about avoiding hell - a Jew who avoids it is a Jew, not a Christian; let alone a Catholic Christian. One of the things that really puts me off Catholicism is that so many people seem to be amazed by the idea that one needs a personal relationship with God - not to have one, makes as much sense to me as being in a marriage with a zombie. IMO, that’s why so much Catholicism is so joyless, & such a slog. If Christian life is not personal, what sort of preparation is it for the Beatific Vision (which is nothing, if not Personal) ? The advocates of impersonal religious practice have not thought their ideas out. If “God is Love”, & if we are to love God, that is to have a personal relation to the Supremely Personal - indeed, Tri-Personal - God; so it is amazing nonsense to advocate an impersonal love of Christ; that is as loopy as talking of a square circle 😦

Is it possible that you are getting too much religion, & experiencing a sort of indigestion or nausea as a result ? Why not give the obviously religious stuff a rest, or at least, do less of it ? FWIW, Christian faith is not primarily a matter of attending services, even the Mass - it’s a way of living from day to day, a way of being a certain sort of person; & that comes far less from our own efforts, than with time, & by God’s grace. It sounds as though you may be trying too hard - bad idea, if so; there is nothing to be said for overstraining yourself, & having a nervous collapse; it does happen. In your position, I would stop trying so hard. I do hope you find a way out of your problem.
 
Meggie said:
I already do the spirtual goodie-goodie disipline ****. I already pray, and go to church (sacraments) and do good works. Infact I do a heck alot more of them.

I don’t think I’m depressed. I have a good life. I like what I have, school is good, my jobs are good, my home life is good. I have a better life than I’ve ever had.

I don’t seek out spiritual highs, far from it, but I’d hoped they’d get me jump started twards that deep understanding and want I used to have.

I just don’t really feel like I WANT religion in my life anymore, even though its a part of all my friends lives.
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Maybe you were really nothing more than a conformist. You did all the right things, because that’s what you’re suppose to do.
In other words, you have religion, but no faith.

Faith, comes from God, not from yourself. It is his revelation of himself to you in some way, however that may happen.

Or, it could be as you say, you are in a dark night of the soul. This being the case however, you will still keep on praying, not because it’s the right thing to do, but because your love for God, transcends anything else.

If it’s the later, try to seek out a spiritual director.

If it;s the former, you must begin to pray and ask for the gift of faith. To do so however, you must be willing to surrender your entire will to God. He will in turn, give you a new birth in Faith.

God Bless
Jim
 
I have a spiritual direcor I feel kinda brushed off. My theological questions are answered, but personally it leaves me lacking. I talk to priests. Very liberal ones brush me off and say explore outside the church very conservitive ones say that I have no business being concerned with my “feelings” over the precious sacrifice God has given.

Should I stop going to communion? Sitting in church today, at Easter Mass, no less I was just like. “Communion means to be in union. I don’t even like the darn church even though I’m here.” Which means that I’m not in union.

My entire life, through all sorts of trials and troubles, I’ve had a strong faith, prayed and seeked out God with every inch of my being and even to the point where I was personally suffering for God & the church. Now my life is wonderful and my spiritual life is nil.🤷
 
Meggie said:
I have a spiritual direcor I feel kinda brushed off. My theological questions are answered, but personally it leaves me lacking. I talk to priests. Very liberal ones brush me off and say explore outside the church very conservitive ones say that I have no business being concerned with my “feelings” over the precious sacrifice God has given.

Should I stop going to communion? Sitting in church today, at Easter Mass, no less I was just like. “Communion means to be in union. I don’t even like the darn church even though I’m here.” Which means that I’m not in union.

My entire life, through all sorts of trials and troubles, I’ve had a strong faith, prayed and seeked out God with every inch of my being and even to the point where I was personally suffering for God & the church. Now my life is wonderful and my spiritual life is nil.🤷
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Please describe what your prayer life consist of.

Jim
 
I described it in my first post…it hasn’t changed
I go to Mass, I pray, I am in a Bible study, listen to Christian Music, surround myself with Catholic and Christian friends, have great spiritual guides and a great college spiritual group.
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It was nearly identical in my religious habits, now and then, I haven’t really changed all that much. I even go to Daily Mass when I can.
 
puzzleannie said:
in reading from an old prayerbook I use sometimes during adoration, there is a selection of advice given by various saints and spiritual directors. This came up a couple of times from I think St. Ignatius, and once from an earlier saint I forget, but same idea;

talking about spiritual doldrums or apathy (they did not use that word) warning that when we are tempted to stop attending to prayer and worship because of boredom, meloncholia, depression, that very often it means we have a persistent sin or evil habit, or a strong tempation that we have been encouraging, that has a growing hold on us, and we are being warned to address that problem. We are instructed to examine our conscience carefully and to uncover that habit and use spiritual warfare to defeat its hold on us. This of course is general, not specific counsel to any individual, but something we should all be aware of.
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I’ve found this to be true for me.
 
puzzleannie said:
in reading from an old prayerbook I use sometimes during adoration, there is a selection of advice given by various saints and spiritual directors. This came up a couple of times from I think St. Ignatius, and once from an earlier saint I forget, but same idea;

talking about spiritual doldrums or apathy (they did not use that word) warning that when we are tempted to stop attending to prayer and worship because of boredom, meloncholia, depression, that very often it means we have a persistent sin or evil habit, or a strong tempation that we have been encouraging, that has a growing hold on us, and we are being warned to address that problem. We are instructed to examine our conscience carefully and to uncover that habit and use spiritual warfare to defeat its hold on us. This of course is general, not specific counsel to any individual, but something we should all be aware of.
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Wow, pretty profound … not to mention accurate!

But then again, I guess most of us could never honestly claim to be utterly free of persistent sinful habits, either venial or mortal 🤷
 
Catholicism is not supposed to be an easy religion. Following Christ has always been a dangerous and risky endeavour but we all know we are all just “working for our salvation with trembling” - to borrow St. Paul’s line. In keeping with these premises, I face up the following realities:

There are times when I feel so dry going to Mass that it looks like I’m just doing it to keep up with an obligation. Something like going through the motions like performing in a stage play. But during one my meditations, it dawned on me: what the heck! If this is a play and I’m playing a bored servant and God is in the audience, I might just as well play the part as best as I can! Even actors earn their living by emoting the character they are assigned to play. Then if God who knows all, sees my performance, gets amused and might kick me up the ladder to play more exciting roles next time!

I also learned that even the sacrifice of living a boring life day by day can be offered to an all-knowing God.

Sorry if can’t offer an easy way out. I found none.
 
“Come. to me, all you who labor and are burdened, … For my yoke is easy, and my burden. light.” (Mt 11:28-30)

Keep Jesus as your source. Without Jesus, religion will seem like non-sense and will be a burden.

Jim
 
Meggie said:
My entire life, through all sorts of trials and troubles, I’ve had a strong faith, prayed and seeked out God with every inch of my being and even to the point where I was personally suffering for God & the church. Now my life is wonderful and my spiritual life is nil.🤷
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So, now that your life is wonderful, your faith has lost its value? It sounds like maybe you’ve lost your perspective, if satisfaction with this life causes you to lose interest in your eternal life. Maybe you need to take a couple of steps outside of your comfort zone and start looking for ways to help those around you whose lives aren’t as wonderful as yours.

Here is a little passage from Deus Caritas Est… Seeing with the eyes of Christ, I can give to others much more than their outward necessities; I can give them the look of love which they crave. Here we see the necessary interplay between love of God and love of neighbour which the First Letter of John speaks of with such insistence. If I have no contact whatsoever with God in my life, then I cannot see in the other anything more than the other, and I am incapable of seeing in him the image of God. But if in my life I fail completely to heed others, solely out of a desire to be “devout” and to perform my “religious duties”, then my relationship with God will also grow arid. It becomes merely “proper”, but loveless. Only my readiness to encounter my neighbour and to show him love makes me sensitive to God as well. Only if I serve my neighbour can my eyes be opened to what God does for me and how much he loves me…

If you want to read the entire enyclical, you can find it here:
vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/encyclicals/documents/hf_ben-xvi_enc_20051225_deus-caritas-est_en.html
 
I guess part of my mindset is that I’m doing everything I should be, and tons more. I give to others, etc.
I even know Latin for crying out loud!
I’m better educated in matters of faith that 90% of my friends, Catholic, Chrisitan, Angnostic, Hindu/Buddaist or Moslem. And while they worship (and sometimes languish or rebel) I just feel like a fish out of water wondering why I wrap up my life with something I’m not sure of why (even though I can get any aswer at the tip of my fingers, its not enough).
If I’m sinning I’m not doing anything major…atleast none that immedatly fall into the category of the ten commandments.

And that last comment has me thinking, maybe my religion was too wraped around suffering. Its like the opposite of a fair-weathered religion. Yet how do I change that?
 
Then again…you’re a college student. Relax a little and enjoy your wonderful life. Be thankful even. You still have marriage and children ahead of you, so you still have so much to learn about the mystery of your faith. You still have many more opportunities to understand the sacrificial nature of love and how that interplays with your relationship with God. It sounds like you are on the right track though. Just be patient.
 
Meggie said:
I guess part of my mindset is that I’m doing everything I should be, and tons more. I give to others, etc.
I even know Latin for crying out loud!
I’m better educated in matters of faith that 90% of my friends, Catholic, Chrisitan, Angnostic, Hindu/Buddaist or Moslem. And while they worship (and sometimes languish or rebel) I just feel like a fish out of water wondering why I wrap up my life with something I’m not sure of why (even though I can get any aswer at the tip of my fingers, its not enough).
If I’m sinning I’m not doing anything major…atleast none that immedatly fall into the category of the ten commandments.

And that last comment has me thinking, maybe my religion was too wraped around suffering. Its like the opposite of a fair-weathered religion. Yet how do I change that?
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You haven’t said what your prayer life consist of. None of what you described above, equals faith, but rather, the practice of religion.

Yes, don’t get wrapped around suffering so much, but rather understand the love of Jesus and build on that relationship of love.

Suffering will come on its own you don’t need to look for it or hope for it as some people do.

Also, be sure you’re not so over extended in your activities, that you have no time for meditation and mental prayer.

Mental prayer is the key to establishing that loving union with Christ. Religious activity in itself, won’t do it, but will discourage you.

In Christ Jesus
Jim
 
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