When people are less than intelligent

[kbwall]

I know this person who is, well, to avoid harsh language, I’ll call her less than intelligent. I mean a lot less than intelligent, and she’s also quite irresponsible too. This wouldn’t both me, but her lack of intelligence and responsibility interferes with other people’s lives, including my own. I’ve tried being nice, and it’s gotten nowhere. All it did was remind me why I was angry in the first place. Being mean makes me feel bad, but at times, it is the only way to get through to her. She thinks she knows everything because with age brings wisdom, but she is an exception to that. She seems to lose wisdom with age. She has showed no signs of getting better, if anything she’s getting worse.

I can’t help but feel angry at her. I know it’s a sin to feel such emotions, but I’m at a loss of what to do. And spending less time with her isn’t exactly practical, given that she’s family. And don’t worry, the anger isn’t bad enough to get physical, I’ve never gotten physically violent, and I don’t see it happening any time in the future. I just want to not feel angry because I know that it’s a sin. How do I not feel angry?

 

[prstoessel]

It is not a sin to be angry. Feelings are neither right or wrong. They just are what they are. How we act upon those feelings, however, are a matter of right and wrong.

Pray for the graces you need to deal with this matter. If this person’s level of understanding really is that low, you have a responsibility to be pastoral to her. If you are in a position where you must interact with her, then just mentally prepare yourself in the proper way to act. Always be kind and patient. Use the opportunity to practice virtue. All through life, such people have to be dealt with.
The flip side of this is that there is likely someone who thinks the same of you to some degree. I know that is the case for me. I know that I must be the source of frustration for someone who needs to practice virtue.

 

[puzzleannie]

I I can’t help but feel angry at her. I know it’s a sin to feel such emotions, but I’m at a loss of what to do. And spending less time with her isn’t exactly practical, given that she’s family. And don’t worry, the anger isn’t bad enough to get physical, I’ve never gotten physically violent, and I don’t see it happening any time in the future. I just want to not feel angry because I know that it’s a sin. How do I not feel angry?

well if this is your mother their is a commandment about this
when you feel anger, make a conscious prayer as an act of love for her
when you feel irritation, do something kind for her that she does not see or know about
when she embarrasses you, offer it up

 

[Waiting]

I know this person who is, well, to avoid harsh language, I’ll call her less than intelligent. I mean a lot less than intelligent, and she’s also quite irresponsible too. This wouldn’t both me, but her lack of intelligence and responsibility interferes with other people’s lives, including my own. I’ve tried being nice, and it’s gotten nowhere. All it did was remind me why I was angry in the first place. Being mean makes me feel bad, but at times, it is the only way to get through to her. She thinks she knows everything because with age brings wisdom, but she is an exception to that. She seems to lose wisdom with age. She has showed no signs of getting better, if anything she’s getting worse.

I can’t help but feel angry at her. I know it’s a sin to feel such emotions, but I’m at a loss of what to do. And spending less time with her isn’t exactly practical, given that she’s family. And don’t worry, the anger isn’t bad enough to get physical, I’ve never gotten physically violent, and I don’t see it happening any time in the future. I just want to not feel angry because I know that it’s a sin. How do I not feel angry?

If this is a grandmother, maybe a mental condition such as Alzheimer’s is entering the picture. In which case, moe and more patience will be required. Or possibly this is a person who is overwhelmed mentally with a problem of which you have no knowledge. That kind of burden can cause someone to be unusually harsh with others. Frustration and an inability to cope with a personal problem can cause one to strike out at others. Not knowing more of the situation, it becomes guesswork. Try your best to be patient and understanding. Is it possible to ask this person what is causing the bad behavior?

 

[Momofmyangels]

How do I not feel angry?

Perhaps, try seeing Christ in her. We are all human, and all with our own faults that probably affect others negatively whether we know it or not. Have charity, see Our Lord in her and treat her as you would Him. Easier said than done, I know, but keep trying. It does get easier with time.

 

[edwest2]

Sometimes, as people age, they lose some mental capacity. Other times, they may develop an emotional issue that makes them become overly assertive, or a way of thinking that makes them act a certain way. For me, I would keep things simple and avoid any triggers that seem to aggravate the problem. Let the other person know you love her and listen. Sometimes, people just want someone to listen to them, even if their ideas are less than intelligent or educated sounding.

Peace,
Ed

 

[rick43235]

I know this person who is, well, to avoid harsh language, I’ll call her less than intelligent. I mean a lot less than intelligent, and she’s also quite irresponsible too. This wouldn’t both me, but her lack of intelligence and responsibility interferes with other people’s lives, including my own.

I can’t help but feel angry at her.

Well, at least you recognize your anger at this person. Since you are aware of your anger, you can work on controlling it. Just remember that this person is not purposely making you angry.

Another thing to remember…intelligence is relative. It is very likely that there is someone else in your life who considers you to be “less than intelligent.” How do you want them to treat you when your “lack of intelligence and responsibility” interferes with their life?