When to start veiling?

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Hi CatholicNewGirl,

As others have said, wearing a head covering was once both a Church requirement and a social custom for any female entering a Catholic Church. It would have been expected at most other Christian churches as well. At least in the United States, the wearing of head coverings in Church started to become more and more infrequent starting in the later 1960s (depending on the location) and became almost non-existent (except for some cultural minorities) by the mid 1970s. By 1983, Church law no longer included a requirement for women to cover their heads.

The mantle (more or less a shawl) is probably the the most ancient form of head covering. It could be worn over the shoulders or pulled up over the head. Both men and women would have worn variations of this kind of garment. The names for the Spanish mantilla and the French mantille come from mantle.

A veil is typically a smaller kind of mantle, often made from a lacy or opaque material that filters the view of what is underneath. When used as a verb, the word veil means to hide. That is why some people like to reserve the use of the word “veiling” to sisters and nuns (when speaking about people. ) Most Catholic women are not really trying to hide, but rather to show respect.

Because wearing head coverings has become rare outside of religious life, first communions, and weddings, some see wearing a head covering as a sign of initiation. This is not the case. It is about being female. So there is no reason to wait until you become Catholic if you feel like wearing a veil.
 
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Hello and welcome. There are not many women who veil at my parish either, There are some who wear hats, some wear scarves, some wear veils, all mostly out of reverence to the Blessed Sacrament. I see no reason why you need to wait until you are fully in the Catholic church to veil.
 
If you want to wear a veil, wear one. I’m in RCIA, and one of the girls in our group has been wearing her lace veil since she started.
 
I think it’s great that you are sensitive to etiquette! It’s kind of you to consider others and not just go ahead and do what you want to do.

I can certainly understand that “getting over timidity” as I suggested, isn’t easy. Do you know anyone in your parish who is more of an extrovert and who would go with you to greet the veiled women (or possibly even knows them already and can introduce you)? I am one of those people who’ll walk up to anyone and say Hi and ask if they have a few minutes to chat. But my husband is quite introverted, so we help each other out.

Best wishes to you! Blessings!
 
Thank you for the kind words! There are maybe 10 women and girls in my parish who wear veils. Our deacon’s daughter-in-law does so, and as I have fairly regular conversations with the deacon’s wife (who is incredibly warm and friendly), she would likely be pretty excited to introduce that particular conversation.

I really appreciate the suggestion! It’s sweet that you and your husband have a partnership in that way! My husband (@nightshade) is much more extroverted than me, and does encourage me to come out of my shell to seek out answers to questions like this. I need that push, and am grateful I have him for it.
 
Just for information, I think what seems to rub some people the wrong way is the word “veiling” being used instead of “head covering”. It might not seem like a big deal, but it sounds like fingernails on a blackboard to some people who grew up with the beautiful ceremony of a woman becoming a nun by the terminology of Taking the Veil, Offering the Habit or Ceremony for Veiling and Profession. It seems like the word has been hijacked from being a beautiful solemn ceremony to mean wearing a head covering.

As others have said, wearing a head covering is up to you. Since you are timid, you can call your church office and ask the secretary about the customs of your particular parish for regular Masses, and then if a head covering for Easter Vigil Mass would be appropriate or would it get in the way if you are going to be Baptized.

All the best on your wonderful journey.
 
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Thanks so much for the information. I have learned through this thread that the term “veiling” does seem to be a point of contention, and I really was completely unaware of that prior to this conversation. I’ve done a fair bit of research on the tradition of head covering for religious purposes, and in sources both recent and not, I’ve seen the term “veiling” or “to veil” used in reference to wearing a mantilla, for example, so that’s where I picked it up.

I mean no disrespect at all, and I do see where you’re coming from in regard to the ceremonies associated with joining the religious life, and the language thereof. I haven’t set out with the intentions to make anyone cringe. That’s actually pretty embarrassing.

If it means that I can get past the issue of semantics and continue to gather more information about the tradition, I will be sure to try and use the term “head covering” or specifically “mantilla” from now on.
 
Using the word “nun” for all religious sisters - - like fingernails on a chalkboard…🤣
 
Oh goodness Zosch, I sure didn’t mean to make you feel bad or embarrassed, that was nowhere on the radar and I am so sorry if I made you feel that way. My only intent was to give you information on why the word can be a touchy subject for some people.

And you are absolutely right Loud-living-dogma! I can never remember if it’s “All nuns are sisters, but not all sisters are nuns”, or the other way around. 🤣 Guess we all get our fingernails sharpened on blackboards. 😉
 
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Oh, no no I’m ok! Promise!! I am here to learn, and it really is great info you shared with me. I just want to be respectful to all and if I could get farther in my pursuit of knowledge on some of these subjects if I use different terms, then I’m all for it. Really grateful for your advice and the info you’ve shared!
 
Here is a small article that explains veiling. I hope this helps you. God bless… Gary

owensborocatholicradio.com

Catholic Q&A #24: Why do some women wear a veil at Mass? - Savior Radio Network

Question: Why do some women wear a veil at Mass? Answer: It has been a long-standing custom in the Church for a woman to wear a veil at Mass or in the presence of our Lord in the Eucharist. Although it seems to have gone out of fashion nowadays, there is certainly nothing that prevents a woman...
owensborocatholicradio.com
 
Hello! So excited to hear about your journey, welcome! I too, am a recent convert 🙂
I have always thought it is such a beautiful tradition to cover one’s head…my husband does say I’m more a grandma…I like “old soul” better considering I’m no where’s near being able to be a grandma 🙂
I just started veiling/covering my head this year, either by a hat or actual veil. My opinion would be it would be beautiful to veil for Easter Vigil. That being said, I know how nerve wracking it was for me to be in front of everyone at the Vigil, and if you are nervous being in front of people, adding something “different” (since only a few veil at your parish) might double your nervousness. I guess what I am trying to say is it is such a special moment to join the Church that I wouldn’t want your nerves to be focused on your head…does that make sense?
So I dont think there is etiquette regarding if you CAN or CAN’T veil before you’re officially in the Church, but consider how nervous you might be and make sure to take that into account.
I hope you enjoy the rest of your RCIA journey, I pray you are able to become active in your parish and make friends, and you never stop your life long learning of God. His love is unfathomable and I don’t think we can ever get to the bottom in this life! I will be praying for you this Easter!!
 
Here is a link to a website I found useful. It’s called Veils by Lily. I’m not plugging for them by any means but I think their questions and answers section will help you decide whether or not veiling is for you. The short answer is, yes,if you feel comfortable with it, you should veil whenever you’re in the presence of the blessed sacrament. It’s a sign of respect for the real presence of God in the Eucharist. I actually did a lot of research on this particular subject when I started attending TLF masses regularly. Hope this helps. 🙂
It says I can’t put links in my post so I’ll just say the website is veilsbylily, and to see the question and answer section.
 
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Once I took Greek and started reading Paul closely, it became pretty clear that men not wearing a hat is a sign of authority under Christ, but also that women wearing a diadem is a sign of their authority under Christ. It is a sign that we who become Christian saints will judge angels, and that we women are the shekinah glory cloud of the human race.

So yeah, it is important, but it is not just and only about modesty or humility. It is also about queenliness, or at least about judgeliness! So basically we have to look formal in public when we go to church, like somebody who is preparing for high office.
 
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zosch said:
Anyway, I thank you all for your advice and know full well that there is nothing doctrinal about laity and head coverings. That being said, there still seem to be certain traditions and etiquettes associated with wearing them that I want to know as much about as I can before participating.
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Honestly, I grew up when we were expected to cover our heads. There were no particular traditions or etiquette that went with it, you just did it, using whatever was usual for your area of the world. Pictures from those days in my parish in New Brunswick, Canada, mostly show women in hats and kerchiefs. (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

So if you want to cover your head now, do so and don’t worry about it. You don’t have to wait until you’re received into full communion.
 
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