When to stop praying for someone?

[Sirach2]

Actually, Moses asked God to hear the prayers of Sts Abraham and Jacob. Protestants cant say that asking God to hear the prayers of deceased saints is wrong. Moses did.

That’s not what today’s reading stated.

Remember your servants Abraham, Isaac and Israel,
and how you swore to them by your own self, saying,
‘I will make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky; and all this land that I promised,
I will give your descendants as their perpetual heritage.’"
So the LORD relented in the punishment
he had threatened to inflict on his people.

Moses did not personally invoke these saints, but simply reminded God of His promise to them concerning their descendants.

 

[Mary888]

God may be testing your persistence

Or patience. When I was explained that meekness means patience not outta place humility this advice changed my perception on a lot of things.

 

[Wm777]

My first thought was - you stop praying when the prayer is fulfilled…

But that doesn’t quite work because the fulfillment of a prayer (i.e. its response) can be “yes”, “no”, or “not yet”…

If the response is positive, you know because it satisfies the petition somehow… like say, your daughter was pregnant, and you wanted her to have a safe delivery… well, once it occurs, then there’s no need to pray for a safe delivery because she’s no longer pregnant, so you’d go on to pray for them to live happily…

If the prayer is “not yet”, then it still seems like it could go either way… I think this is more to the point of the question…

I once prayed for one lady who was going through a really nasty divorce, and she was turning to the church in turn… I prayed for her for 2 to 3 years straight… and she did become Catholic, and she was somewhat interested in me as an eligible bachelor, although I could also tell she wasn’t really in any proper mindset to make a love decision… I really felt bad for her though, and I did like her, so my resolve was to simply hold out hope for what was really best for her either way… This was a sort of “not yet” situation…

Well, after awhile I could just sort of tell the prayerful answer was going from “not yet” to “no”… But it wasn’t a hard break sort of “no”… I did everything I could to try to help her out, and I really cared about her, as she did me… and we never did anything wrong… But it was definitely a no… and, oddly enough, while it was a “no” - it didnt really hurt or feel like I was glad to get rid of her - it was just sort of a satisfactory feeling that the answer was no, even though we did the best we could…

So I would look at your petition, the response and how things are unfolding… somewhere in there… you’ll find something that either satisfies the petition, or serves the well being of everyone involved… and that will probably help you to discern how to move things along in the proper spirit…

 

[Sirach2]

. . . but I’m now kind of afraid to ask him for anything more

“Be not afraid, little flock, for it has pleased your Father to give you the kingdom.”
He delights in our childlike confidence, trusting in Him to hear our requests, so do ask Him for your needs. I think we give Him joy when He answers us and we respond with glad praise and thanksgiving. A grateful heart is pleasing to Him, very much so. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

 

[Sirach2]

So I would look at your petition, the response and how things are unfolding… somewhere in there… you’ll find something that either satisfies the petition, or serves the well being of everyone involved… and that will probably help you to discern how to move things along in the proper spirit…

Unless Our Lord allows me to see the fruit of my prayer concerning these four, I will have no way to know if He has heard my many prayers. This is very heavy on my heart, so I suspect I will continue storming heaven, even after Lent is over.

Thanks for responding Wm777.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Well, yes, but you see my dilemma. I don’t want anyone else to die right now or bad things to happen for a bit.

I do ask for tons of help with my daily life, but I’m not spiritually to the point where I can say, “Lord please send me some more suffering so I can bear it gladly for your sake and to save souls.”
I’m pretty much like Peter trying to walk on the water without taking his eyes off Jesus, just trying not to sink. My husband’s death was the fifth death in his close family within a year, my mom died about a year before his family started dying, I lost friends too. Just trying to stay afloat and TCB, I am.

 

[Striving_Catholic]

I firmly believe that prayer is never wasted, and that if you are patient, you will see the fruits of your prayer. There are always “droughts” in prayer, where it appears as if nothing is working or coming out of your prayer, but many of the Saints were the ones who stuck with prayer during those droughts. St. Monica, a Christian married to a man of a pagan religion, prayed for her husband and son’s conversion for many, many years. Her husband converted shortly before his death (if I am not mistaken), and her son (who is now known to us as St. Augustine) didn’t convert until around age 30 (if I am not mistaken again). St. Augustine is a Doctor of the Church, and he wrote some intriguing works and made many contributions to the Church. Perhaps if his mother hadn’t been so fervent in her prayer and so faithful to God, her son would not have carried out the will of the Father. Remember that, and perhaps do your own research on St. Monica and St. Augustine for strength when you feel as though your prayers are worth nothing. Allow God to do his work, even if he doesn’t answer you in the way you would like for a long time.

 

[Sirach2]

My husband’s death was the fifth death in his close family within a year, my mom died about a year before his family started dying, I lost friends too. Just trying to stay afloat and TCB, I am.

I understand your concerns, and you no doubt know best how to take one day at a time, and “stay afloat.” Wow, you’ve been through the wringer! I don’t blame you for not wishing to encounter any more deep suffering. God bless!

 

[Sirach2]

Allow God to do his work, even if he doesn’t answer you in the way you would like for a long time.

I send my warmest welcome to you as our new and “striving” Catholic! May you find many new friends here at CAF as you share your faith with all of us.
I truly appreciate your response, and I do esteem St. Monica’s long, long standing in prayer, and it has given me courage to also stay the course. I’m now of the opinion that I was given this temptation by our ancient enemy, to get me to abandon ship, so to speak. Thankfully due to so many wise responses today from our community, I am on the right track again.

 

[Psalms62]

My same thoughts! You know I beginning to understand and love my religion.

 

[egretps]

The OP offered Lent as the time frame, I do think pushing through to Easter might be the best ‘ending’ as others have stated. I am familiar with ‘praying for someone’ fatigue.

I find it easy to pray those I love or someone who seems ‘worthy’. I’m not joking some of the most ‘easy’ are so lost and what a huge story if they convert! My mother has been praying for my unbaptised father for more than fifty years, what a story if he converts and gets baptized! Well, I’m pretty certain it doesn’t work on our terms…I’ve wondered if my dad converts would my mom try to take some of the ‘Glory’? I’m not trying to be hard on her, but once in awhile I do wonder. THAT wouldn’t be good for her soul either.

I have been praying since I was young for those that come to mind. Recently I was praying nearly daily for a few people. I had no set time frame such as Lent, but at some point I ended it formally. Mind you praying for these people wasn’t a treat but rather a charity of sorts. Most of them were former friends and difficult family members. After about two years I ’let go’ of these souls into Gods hands. I still pray for some of them, but now it’s just as they come to mind or in ocational ‘ family ‘news’ . I have no Idea if the prayers I said helped them in any way, not even a smidgeon, but the act of praying for them changed me.

I would suggest pressing through until the end of Lent, it’s not far away.

 

[Sirach2]

The OP offered Lent as the time frame, I do think pushing through to Easter might be the best ‘ending’ as others have stated.

I suppose the reason I decided to pray during Lent is because I just learned in March that they had left our Church for a non-denominational Church, and it broke my heart. One of them said she intends to have a rebaptism with full submersion, since our Church does not do this. She wanted it to be done like Jesus’ baptism. No explanation I offered would change her mind.

Since Lent is a sacrificial time to obtain many graces, it seemed the perfect time to pray and offer sacrifice for them. I wish I had more faith that they might benefit from God’s graces and come home to Catholicism. I hoped that since their departure was fairly recent, there might be a chance for them to return, as they come to hunger for the Eucharist and the Mass.

Another prodigal, as I call them all, has been on my mind from time to time. He left the church after his wife (my best friend) died about 12 years ago. I trust her prayers from heaven are even more powerful than mine could ever be.

But thank you, I will keep going at least until Easter, and perhaps beyond.

 

[egretps]

Another prodigal, as I call them all, has been on my mind from time to time. He left the church after his wife (my best friend) died about 12 years ago. I trust her prayers from heaven are even more powerful than mine could ever be.

We don’t really know what the currency or power our particular prayers hold. My mother always says the prayers of children are the most powerful. She would ask my kids to pray for her to find those important papers she misplaced… I tended to ask St. Anthony with them.
I hope my grannies are praying for us in the afterlife, they certainly did before their passing. In my experience it’s the hard work down here we don’t always see the ‘answers’ or the answers we expect.

I think you are having a more fruitful Lent than you are aware

 

[fin]

I want to say thanks to everyone who posted their experiences here so far. I have also been praying for several things, people intentions for years, going to daily Mass etc. And it seems that i don’t know, has not happened, or maybe the answer is no. It has led me to wonder many times, well what is wrong with me? Other people pray the green scapular prayer and report results. They pray novenas to saint so and so and get what they ask for. And then there’s me, hopefully being patient all these years, but not seeming to have any results.

So i like the example of puttinf money in the piggy bank. That is what I have been doing dor a long time now, and I hope, really hope to see a result or effect.

To be fair, I have prayers that were answered yes. I am very thankful for that. Nevertheless, I have really important life changing intentions to which i have tried mking efforts to improve or change, and pray, but so far still… But I have no other choice but to hope. Honestly, what else can I do?

 

[jesusmademe]

I know, but it is simmilar to what we do nowadays. I mean, that was how Moses did it in his time, right?

 

[Sirach2]

I’m not following your thought, that what Moses did, we do nowadays. All Moses did was to represent these saints to God to remind God of His promise to them. If you mean that we “represent” something to God to remind Him of something, you may be right. But I do not believe this text is able to prove the Catholic belief in “Communion of Saints.”

 

[Sirach2]

So i like the example of putting money in the piggy bank. That is what I have been doing dor a long time now, and I hope, really hope to see a result or effect.

I’m so glad this was helpful to you. I had not shared the complete evidence or sign from God concerning my husband’s salvation, but this, too, may be helpful.

While I wasn’t particularly devoted to St. Faustina’s Chaplet of Divine Mercy, I had a sudden inspiration to pray it for my husband while I waited in the car as he shopped for tools. My devotion was very ardent that day, and I poured my soul into it. Within three hours of praying that Chaplet, he died. I have no doubt that God inspired me to pray at that special moment prior to his death.

One night I had problems sleeping, and I spent a few moments in prayer, asking God to help me understand whether or not he was spared eternal punishment. I turned on the TV in my bedroom a few minutes after praying, around 2 A.M., and heard these words from Father Corapi’s Saturday night EWTN broadcast. “God will often apply the many years of our prayers for a person at the final moment of their death and it will save them.” Now if I had turned on the TV one minute later, I would have missed the answer, or if I had been watching for the entire broadcast, I might have thought it was a coincidence. However, I had just voiced this petition in prayer, and here was the answer in a form I could really hear. These two examples were both prior to the awesome joy I experienced at Mass that I shared earlier, and that was the final proof to me of God’s saving grace.

God is very gracious and loving, and He will send understanding when the time is right. I’m sure your prayer is being heard and being readied for an answer, in God’s perfect time. It is hard to wait, yes? I hear you! Don’t give up, my friend.

 

[Sirach2]

I think you are having a more fruitful Lent than you are aware

Thank you for your vote of confidence. I agree that children’s prayers are very effective. May we always have the simplicity and heart of a child as we approach God in prayer.

We don’t really know what the currency or power our particular prayers hold.

 

[jesusmademe]

Ok, when do we do this today?

 

[Sirach2]

Ok, when do we do this today?

Do what? You mean, remind God of a promise He made to us? I have done this during five years, standing on His promise from Jeremiah 1:19
“They will fight against you, but not prevail over you, for I am with you to deliver you, says the Lord.”

I was in a lawsuit and had received God’s promise to me from Jeremiah. I struggled when things seems to go awry, and it was true - they did fight hard against me. But I stood firm in that verse, believing in God’s promise. And yes, it came true. I was delivered with a good result, and my opponent did not win over me.

This was the only time I stood on a solid promise. When God graciously blesses us His word, it is good to “remind” Him of it in prayer, especially when we face difficulty in the matter.

Moses interceded in a matter of dire importance - the punishment of the idolaters. And God heard his argument and relented.