When to stop praying?!

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mariam1976

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I am going through a divorce and everyday i find myself praying for restoration… when do i know to stop praying and accept it as a will of God?
I keep getting signs that it will get restored but I wonder if I am reading too much into the signs??

Have any of you come across this situation and could you help me??:confused:
 
i can’t tell you about the signs, but i would like to remind you of the words of paul “PRAY WITHOUT CEASING”. that’s right, NEVER STOP PRAYING, and i will pray too
 
Hello Mariam,

I saw your novena on St. Therese about receiving a rose, and hesitated to respond to you lest you may be putting too much confidence in this sign. It may or may not be a sign of restoration.

When I was praying for my marriage, I loved my husband more than anything, and prayed continuously for healing in our marriage. Mind you, I went to daily mass and communion for many months, and did not relent in private prayer. Imagine my near despair, for I thought that God had abandoned me, and that my prayer would have prevailed victoriously.

It did not happen that way at all, and I had to go through the divorce. Many years later, my prayer was answered, and we got remarried. This matter may be one of timing. God may need time to work everything out in both of your lives. What you may not want to hear is that both parties bear some responsibility for the breakup, and God has to work on two people to bring about harmony and change.

Maybe you need to change your prayer to the serenity prayer.
God help me to accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Meanwhile, trust His guidance and immense love for both of you, and believe that if it is possible, He will work it all out.
 
thank you joysong…
a lot of people have told me to start praying for god’s will but everytime i try to do that, something inside of me tells me that i should continue to pray for restoration.
i do know that i am a lot to blame for the condition of this marriage… 😦 and i take full responsibility for it…
i just wish that god would allow me to repent and make things up for him… 😦
 
Remember the story of St Monica and St Augustine. For 30 or more years she prayed for his restoration to the true Christian faith when he was steeped in sin and heresy. St Ambrose saw her praying and said ‘the child of so many tears will not be permitted to perish’.

Keep praying - please do add ‘thy will be done’ after each prayer. And mean it. After all, God may have all sorts of purposes in mind for us that we don’t yet know. Remember that Jesus himself prayed for his cup of suffering to be taken away and was denied this, instead he was given strength to endure and angels to console him.
 
After our divorce, I began to pray that God would bring me a good Christian husband. Then I converted and prayed that He would give me a good Catholic husband. Little did I know, my ex was having his own conversion (actually reversion) at the same time. He became the husband I needed. We went to Retrouvaille, and were able to reconcile and remarry, but we had been divorced a couple years at that point. God needed us each, individually, to turn to Him and give our lives totally to Him before we could work as a couple again. So it is possible, but maybe God has something in store for both of you before that happens. I’ll pray for you.
 
mariam1976 said:
thank you joysong…
a lot of people have told me to start praying for god’s will but everytime i try to do that, something inside of me tells me that i should continue to pray for restoration.
i do know that i am a lot to blame for the condition of this marriage… 😦 and i take full responsibility for it…
i just wish that god would allow me to repent and make things up for him… 😦
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You seem to think that praying for God’s will and restoration are opposed to the other. When I pray, I will say something like, “God, I really want this, but I ask for your will to be done in my life and this situation” or whatever. I acknowledge to myself and to God that I do have a prefered answer but that I desire to submit myself to his will. I try to get out of the way as much as possible so God’s grace can do it’s thing.
 
you are right!! thats what i think… isnt it?
Its because my novenas have been interrupted all the time … broken and I feel like God is telling me that this request cannot be granted.
I am confused about why the novenas are broken? Is it God telling me that the request will not be fulfilled or is it the Devil trying to stop me from praying?
 
mariam1976 said:
a lot of people have told me to start praying for god’s will but everytime i try to do that, something inside of me tells me that i should continue to pray for restoration.
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Maybe that “something” is the voice of the Holy Spirit. Maybe you’re doing God’s will by continuing to pray for restoration.
 
mariam1976 said:
I am going through a divorce and everyday i find myself praying for restoration… when do i know to stop praying and accept it as a will of God?
I keep getting signs that it will get restored but I wonder if I am reading too much into the signs??

Have any of you come across this situation and could you help me??:confused:
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i have been there, yes. but, what i have learned through praying…is that i need to pray for God’s will…period. if your marriage is meant for reconciliation, then God will bring that to you. and…i will pray for you, as well…that God brings you peace and that you allow yourself to be open to whatever His will brings you. I am sorry you are going through a divorce…😦
 
mariam1976 said:
you are right!! thats what i think… isnt it?
Its because my novenas have been interrupted all the time … broken and I feel like God is telling me that this request cannot be granted.
I am confused about why the novenas are broken? Is it God telling me that the request will not be fulfilled or is it the Devil trying to stop me from praying?
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There could be a few things going on…
Are you aiming for a perfect Novena so your prayer will be answered? I don’t think God works that way. A novena is a devotion that helps us grow in our relationship with God, not the fee due for a answered prayer. So don’t worry if they are “broken” or interrupted, keep praying. Trust.

If your prayer was answered what would you do? If your prayer wasn’t answered what would you do? The answer should almost be the same thing spiritually: give thanks and praise to God. Could you honestly do that? Not saying it would be easy if it was the latter but could you do that?

I’m going to throw something out that’s kind of far out but it’s for consideration. Perhaps you are sabotaging the novena. What will you do if God doesn’t answer your prayers the way you want Him to? Will your faith falter? Can you deal with being angry with God? Can you bear another disappointment? If one’s faith is young or immature this will be greater struggle than if it is strong and mature.

I’m concerned my reply may be overwhelming. You are dealing with so much already. Take what you can and trust Jesus. My heart goes out to you during this sad time.
 
Bruised_Reed said:
There could be a few things going on…
Are you aiming for a perfect Novena so your prayer will be answered? I don’t think God works that way. A novena is a devotion that helps us grow in our relationship with God, not the fee due for a answered prayer. So don’t worry if they are “broken” or interrupted, keep praying. Trust.

If your prayer was answered what would you do? If your prayer wasn’t answered what would you do? The answer should almost be the same thing spiritually: give thanks and praise to God. Could you honestly do that? Not saying it would be easy if it was the latter but could you do that?

I’m going to throw something out that’s kind of far out but it’s for consideration. Perhaps you are sabotaging the novena. What will you do if God doesn’t answer your prayers the way you want Him to? Will your faith falter? Can you deal with being angry with God? Can you bear another disappointment? If one’s faith is young or immature this will be greater struggle than if it is strong and mature.

I’m concerned my reply may be overwhelming. You are dealing with so much already. Take what you can and trust Jesus. My heart goes out to you during this sad time.
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NO… your reply helped a lot… it helped me understand that my novenas being broken are ok… i was aiming for a perfect novena for answered prayer… i have been alternatively been angry with god and being sad…
i might be sabotaging the novena too… i dont think my faith is mature enough to handle the disappointment and i have a lot of anxiety and pain right now due to the divorce…
 
These scriptures have been on my heart for you.

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. ~ Psalm 37:4,5

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13
 
when i pray, when i need something, when i have a petition…

i ask one time. and then i leave it in God’s hands.

He’s not dumb, he hears me. i put in one request for my needs, and i never bring it up again unless a special circumstance arises.

i trust he hears me the first time, and then i go back to my normal conversation with the Lord.

Hope all works out for you.
 
thechrismyster said:
when i pray, when i need something, when i have a petition…

i ask one time. and then i leave it in God’s hands.

He’s not dumb, he hears me. i put in one request for my needs, and i never bring it up again unless a special circumstance arises.

i trust he hears me the first time, and then i go back to my normal conversation with the Lord.

Hope all works out for you.
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Well, even Jesus asked a few times in the Garden of Gethsemane, chris 😉

Although I suppose he IS the second person of the Trinity.
 
Mariam,
you sound alot like I sounded many years ago. I was married, with four children and my husband had left me for another woman. I prayed so much and so hard for God to restore my marriage. That is almost the ONLY thing I prayed for.
I was too scared to ask for anything else other that what I wanted. I cried night after night and hoped and prayed for God to bring my husband back to me.
In the meantime, my faith became the most important thing in my life and it’s the only thing that kept me going through those terribly hard and lonely years.
God did not answer my prayer the way I wanted it, but I have no doubt that He answered my prayer in the best way possible.
My husband and I got divorced and I got an annulment. I did not want to get divorced, I felt like a failure.
But it was God’s permissive will and now I have learnt to pray for God’s Will, whatever that is in my life, because His Will for me is the BEST I can ask for.
I trust God that whatever happens in the situations I am praying about is the right thing, because HE knows best.
Try to let go of that burning desire to have it work out exactly the way YOU want it to. God may have other plans… and HE KNOWS BEST.
He wants you to get to a point where you can say, ‘not my will, but your will be done.’
and little by little you will learn to let go of those burning desires and put it all into God’s hands.
God may restore your marriage, but maybe not in your timeframe. Then you should also pray for patience to wait as long as He wants you to. He will guide you through.
You can still pray for whatever you want but always be ready to accept His will in everything. That is complete trust in God and why shouldn’t we trust Him?
He loves us more than we could imagine and will only give us what is best for us.
Try to relax and put it all into God’s hands and like Padre Pio used to say, ‘Pray, hope and don’t worry.’
And pray for God to increase your trust in Him, He will and that will bring you peace in your soul.
God Bless you
 
Just affirming what others have said about learning to pray to accept the will of God. If you cannot pray “thy will be done” and mean it, pray for the grace to mean it.

Ezekiel 2:8-3:3
. . ."[H]ear what I say to you; be not rebellious . . ; open your mouth, and eat what I give you." And when I looked, behold, a hand was stretched out to me, and, lo, a written scroll was in it; and . . . there were written on it words of lamentation and mourning and woe. . . . And he said to me, “Son of man, eat this scroll that I give you and fill your stomach with it.” Then I ate it; and it was in my mouth as sweet as honey.
 
thank you so much for all your responses… unfortunately i dont think i am spiritually there yet to accept god’s will to be done…

this is the same thing that others have told me… after all, how do you accept that your marriage which was your lifelong dream is gone? they say that you should storm the gates of heaven and be like the woman who kept asking the judge for justice. he eventually had to give it to her.
 
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