Where do I go from here?

[PJM]

I think…I often feel like most Christians, even Catholics, are more interested in protecting ideological camps than in love for either the Lord or for their neighbor

Simply NOT true dear friend

We have Jesus Chrisi in Person; Really; Trully and Substanually Present in every Catholic Church; at every Mass There is no greater love by God or FOR God because it is WITH God that we Worship

I get the same set of pat “explanations” reiterated even after saying that those ones don’t work. I feel like most people are more tied to some christianized version of their political affiliation than anything having to do with real Christianity. All conservative christian stuff is good, all liberal stuff is atheistic and evil, type of attitude

What is it specifically that your looking for:shrug: I am one Catholic; among many, who will address your concerens directly. Be specific and we can reply in specifics.

It’s like what I was saying with the historical forms. I think the tridentine mass is very beautiful, and there’s something quite special about having mass celebrated in the same tongue, all over the world. At the same time, I certainly don’t have any problems with the new form - in fact I think it’s for the best for it to be the primary form. But I often feel frustrated the the tridentine mass seems to have been taken over by the ultra-conservative elements. I know when I went I felt incredibly out of place - I was the only woman there by herself, and I was in a modern, somewhat fashionable skirt, top, and hairband rather than the denim/khaki skirt and mantilla of all the other women.

I deal with this all over the place. You either accept the conservative party line fully, or the liberal party line fully. Often times I feel like it has more to do with being a good democrat or republican than anything else. And it just gets in the way of asking honest questions and getting nuanced answers without getting demonized.

My friend your creating an ISSUE where their ought NOT be one.

As I have expressed and expained in a previous post: Catholic Mass is DEVINE WORSHIP and only Devine Worship; because we DO HAVE God in our midst. everything else gets close to be not at all relevant. It’s NOT about us; how we look or how we feel about each other. It’s Focused on our God:thumbsup:

I do understand that for those comming from orther faith practices where the emphasis is at least as much on the comunity; feelings and the like as it is God is a HUGE Transition to make. But it is one that needs to be made. I taught RCIA for 3 years and deal in my own Minsitry with many such converts. It can be done.

Please try to Focus ON God in your YOUR Presence and let everything else be as it may.

God Bless you,
pat/PJM

 

[Della]

See, even here…when I was an atheist I felt really unwelcome in public places, because everything was so explicitly Christian. I felt like I was constantly being judged as a worse employee and a dangerous person just because I wasn’t Christian. I could be the hardest worker at the job and still be judged as lazy against the Christian that hung around texting on his phone. Or I couldn’t participate in any of the trauma recovery groups, because anything I said about my beliefs or my experiences with church, no matter how neutrally put, was considered an attack.

No one should be put into such boxes. My dh experienced snide remarks and he too couldn’t do anything right no matter that he worked harder and did more than anyone else in the office as far as his boss was concerned because she had a deep bias against Catholics. So, this kind of behavior is bad no matter who does it, I agree.

That’s what I finally learned - both sides always think the other is trying to shove their viewpoints down their throats. The secularists think the religious people are trying to shove religion down their throats, and exclude their views from society. The religious think the secularists are doing the same to them. And of course everyone thinks that the other side is being entirely intentional about it. If you asked the secularists, they’d say they were just trying to defend separation of church and state, which the religious right is trying to tear down. If you asked the religious, they would say the exact same thing.

I understand, however, it’s at this point in time it’s not the religious who are bringing towns and churches and businesses to court to force them to remove any connection to religion in their communities, it’s secularists. It’s simply not the case that religious people want to force others to hold to the same beliefs. Freedom of religion is exactly that. The recent court decisions are unconstitutional and ridiculous, IMHO. They hurt far more people than they help and are unwanted by the vast majority who have had these rulings come down against them. Secularists might talk about believers imposing on them, but they are the ones actually doing it. People are going to fight back–that’s only normal, and it’s also how our system of govenment works. There’s always going to be a tug and pull in a republic.

As far as politics go - it’s the introduction of the irrelevant. For example, I support universal public health care. I don’t support abortion or birth control being covered under it. But you wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve been attacked, because the happenstance of our political system has linked the two. And people assume if you support the first you must support the second.

If only those pushing abortion and contraception weren’t insisting that they be included in univeral health care, I could agree. And I could agree if it weren’t mandatory. Besides, when put into practice, those who can afford to pay more get to the front of the line and those who can’t are forced to wait, even for life saving procedures. It sounds lovely on paper but in the real world it only hurts those it purports to help the most. I wish it were otherwise, I truly do, but that’s the reality.

What I’ve found is we have to be wise about these things. We have to see how such ideas actually function in the real world. For example, if people have no incentive to work, they won’t work. It was tried in the early Church but it failed for this very reason. It tells me that we truly are fallen creatures whose intellects have been darkened, our will to do good weakened, and our ability to see what is truly right and good wounded. This is why we need Christ and his Church–to help us understand, become and act as people who have our priorities straight for the right reasons.

 

[DarkLight]

In my experience Protestantism was focused almost entirely away from community and feeling. That’s the whole problem…I’m trying to get away from the ‘‘it’s just you and God’’ mentality, where nothing mattered but whether you believed the right things. But there’s no depth to what I get in real life her, no one talking past little kid stuff.

 

[Della]

In my experience Protestantism was focused almost entirely away from community and feeling. That’s the whole problem…I’m trying to get away from the ‘‘it’s just you and God’’ mentality, where nothing mattered but whether you believed the right things. But there’s no depth to what I get in real life her, no one talking past little kid stuff.

Catholicism is definitely about community. We are a community of believers not “Lone Rangers for Jesus”. One of our most deeply held beliefs is that we should care for the poor and afflicted. And the Church as been very good at it. It was Catholics who founded the first hospitals, schools for poor children, universities, etc. The idea that a man is innocent until proven guilty comes from Judao-Christian ideas about the dignity of the human person. The problem with government taking over these things is that charity becomes cold bureaucracy. The law of love devolves into the law of power. There is no limit to the depths of Catholicism. It feeds the simplest soul and nourshies the deeper thinker. Men like Fulton Sheen, G. K. Chesterton, Thomas Aquinas, Augustine found the richest treasures in the Church’s teachings. The Church speaks to every heart and every mind that is willing to accept the Gospel message of Christ. It is in exhaustable, ever young and yet wise with age and experience.

 

[DarkLight]

I guess…I do want to be part of a community. But my experiences with Christians have been mostly negative. To the point where I’m ashamed to call myself one, because I don’t want to be associated with the ones I know. Christian charity was a joke - people grudgingly giving out help while letting you know constantly how grateful you should be for their scraps. People always looking and suspecting you of scamming them, like you’re guilty until you prove your perfection. Being left vulnerable to whatever personal biases someone had, no matter how baseless, with no recourse. Or frequently with no help in the first place, because that service isn’t offered in this area.

It goes beyond that. Most Christians simply didn’t care. They talk about helping right until the minute it hits their own community and makes them uncomfortable. Then they do everything in their power to show why you deserved everything. Because the one unthinkable thing is for one of them, an equal, to need charity. That’s for those lesser, lazy people out there.

 

[Della]

I guess…I do want to be part of a community. But my experiences with Christians have been mostly negative. To the point where I’m ashamed to call myself one, because I don’t want to be associated with the ones I know. Christian charity was a joke - people grudgingly giving out help while letting you know constantly how grateful you should be for their scraps. People always looking and suspecting you of scamming them, like you’re guilty until you prove your perfection. Being left vulnerable to whatever personal biases someone had, no matter how baseless, with no recourse. Or frequently with no help in the first place, because that service isn’t offered in this area.

It goes beyond that. Most Christians simply didn’t care. They talk about helping right until the minute it hits their own community and makes them uncomfortable. Then they do everything in their power to show why you deserved everything. Because the one unthinkable thing is for one of them, an equal, to need charity. That’s for those lesser, lazy people out there.

The Catholic Church has many apostolates set up to help people when they are in need, no matter what their status has been or is. For example, every year our parish has a Jesse Tree program to give food and Christmas gifts to those who need them. I over heard the gal who runs the program telling the teens who would be helping distribute that some people would be coming in nice clothes and up scale cars, but they were not to be judge by that. Many people had lost their jobs and had no more resources left.

There are several Catholic agencies set up to help people, such as Catholic Charities. In my area a Catholic lady simply saw the need to help the homeless and so started a soup kitchen and homeless shelter. No one should be judged by appearances or by social status. I’m sorry that’s been your experience but I hope if you become Catholic you’ll never have that experience again.

 

[DarkLight]

I think the frustration…it’s not just that I’m missing any advanced training. It’s that almost all the stuff I’m finding on my own is meant for people from very different backgrounds, or makes very different assumptions than what I’m used to.

For one example: I was an atheist for a time. This had some very strong moral motivations for me. Simply put, I was firmly convinced that religion made people morally worse. (Which I still think is true for certain people.) I was used to religion promoting a very separatist attitude that I still find morally reprehensible. Similarly, I disliked the idea of doing good things because of reward or punishment - I still find the idea of purgatory a significant obstacle for this reason. Simply put, it’s hard for me to imagine someone being truly good or evil when there are known consequences for their actions. True morality only exists when good actions are taken for their own sake, not for some reward or punishment.

Another example: The phrase “the dignity of women”, in my background, almost always preceded some sexist thing someone was about to say. I still flinch when I hear it. A lot of the stuff I read makes no sense because the phrases are so loaded for me. But I don’t feel like I can talk about this anywhere, because I just get attacked if I say anything publicly - including here, really. Some of the threads on this place scare me!

 

[Della]

I think the frustration…it’s not just that I’m missing any advanced training. It’s that almost all the stuff I’m finding on my own is meant for people from very different backgrounds, or makes very different assumptions than what I’m used to.

There can a “culture shock” effect when one becomes Catholic. I experienced it, too. It’s a process of learning and adjustment, something like joining the military and boot camp, only not that intense or for the same reasons.

For one example: I was an atheist for a time. This had some very strong moral motivations for me. Simply put, I was firmly convinced that religion made people morally worse. (Which I still think is true for certain people.)

Some people use and abuse religion because they are users and abusers. Anyone can fake being religious but no one can fake being a true saint.

I was used to religion promoting a very separatist attitude that I still find morally reprehensible.

The Church looks for whatever is good/truthful in everyone and everything. All it claims for itself is that the true subsists within it and that only because of the charism of the Holy Spirit and not due to any man’s goodness, except Christ’s, of course. Some things simply are true and some thing simply are false. We can’t ditch truth to appease falsehood because it then becomes evil rather than goodness.

Similarly, I disliked the idea of doing good things because of reward or punishment - I still find the idea of purgatory a significant obstacle for this reason.

The reward of heaven is like the reward of the wedding day. It’s not something one earns but it is something one works towards with joyful anticipation. Our “reward” is union with God–to be one with he who made us and loved us. It’s not about gaining brownie point. And purgatory is about justice–we must pay for the temporal damage our sins did to others. This is only fair. We can avoid this by penance and almsgiving–helping others in need instead of thinking only of ourselves and what we want.

Simply put, it’s hard for me to imagine someone being truly good or evil when there are known consequences for their actions. True morality only exists when good actions are taken for their own sake, not for some reward or punishment.

People most often do things because they believe they will gain something. Most people who have done evil things actually believed they were doing some kind of good or they believed they would get what they wanted. The saintly person does good for the sake of it–that’s what being transformed into Christ means–restoring the right reasons for what we do.

Another example: The phrase “the dignity of women”, in my background, almost always preceded some sexist thing someone was about to say. I still flinch when I hear it. A lot of the stuff I read makes no sense because the phrases are so loaded for me. But I don’t feel like I can talk about this anywhere, because I just get attacked if I say anything publicly - including here, really. Some of the threads on this place scare me!

Every person, male or female, has the same dignity, that is right and true. Men and women are equally intelligent and capable, as well. There is nothing in Church teaching that states otherwise. Men have some ministries that are reserved for them but that is a matter of authority not of dignity. Many women have had great authority in the Church, even over men, but the ministral duties God has assigned to men because of Adam’s failure and because God chose to come among us as a man–to make right what the first man made wrong. Anyway, if you’d like to discuss this issue via PM, please feel free to contact me.

 

[klm120861]

I think the frustration…it’s not just that I’m missing any advanced training. It’s that almost all the stuff I’m finding on my own is meant for people from very different backgrounds, or makes very different assumptions than what I’m used to.

How very true. Becoming a Catholic means, among other things, learning a whole new “language” if you will, because many of the things we saw in our churches didn’t match what they said. In the Catholic Church, there seems to be an understanding of the importance of language and generally speaking, what they say is what they mean, and how they live. The Church teaching is Truth. 100% Truth. Where we came from, maybe it was, maybe it wasn’t. This means reprogramming you mind, if you will, and basically throwing out all you knew as a Prot. and starting over with the real meaning of things.

.

True morality only exists when good actions are taken for their own sake, not for some reward or punishment.

You are exactly right here. And show a great grasp of Catholic teaching. It’s like the difference between going to reconciliation and having perfect contrition, being sorry that you have offended the one you love most, and having imperfect contrition, you don’t want to go to hell. We are all called to be Jesus to our world, therefore we are all called to do good and right because it’s good and right. If we do them for any other reason, our reasons are disordered, which is an area of growth we need to work on.

Another example: The phrase “the dignity of women”, in my background, almost always preceded some sexist thing someone was about to say. I still flinch when I hear it. A lot of the stuff I read makes no sense because the phrases are so loaded for me.

I know exactly what you mean. In the Catholic Church, when the Popes and others talk about the “dignity of women” they mean exactly that. They are saying that to gently try to correct all the people out there who think women are “less than” because of the fact that they are women. The Catholic Church is full of women saints who are great examples of strong, smart, capable women. I just watched a film called “Vision” on Netflix last night about St. Hildegard. She was born around the turn of the last millinium, at a time when the “dignity” women had was very little. Amazing woman. In the Catholic Church, far more than in secular society, where a woman is judged by her appearance and job, or in Prot. churches where a women is at least partly judged on the holiness of her husband, a woman is…encouraged to use the gifts she has been given in whatever manner God calls her to use them. I can say that, because God isn’t going to call her to do anything she is physically incapable of doing, like being a priest. If he wanted her to do that, she would have been born a boy. But the Catholic Church recognizes that women can do things in ways that men can’t. Look at the religious orders, and you see the “dignity of women” celebrated. Some are educators, nurses, doctors, look at Bl. Mother of Theresa, some are prayer warriors, and on and on.

One of my “loaded phrases” is “now we’re going to pray for a new outpouring of the Holy Spirit”. I hear phrases like that, and immediately I picture everyone lining up to have someone lay hands on them and - very loudly - calling down the Holy Spirit, while pushing backwards on their forehead. And everyone watching to see who is going up and who is not. Imagine my surprise when it came time for that prayer, and the mission leader simply said something along the lines of, “God we ask for a fresh outpouring of the Holy Spirit on this church. Amen.” That was it. Okay, there might have been a couple more sentences said, but basically, that was it. No lines, no noise, no nothing. I think that’s when I really began to realize that what I had experienced in the Prot. world was nothing like the way it’s supposed to be. And I’ve been a Catholic for over 8 years. Give yourself some time. You’ll get there.
Kris

 

[DarkLight]

Some people use and abuse religion because they are users and abusers. Anyone can fake being religious but no one can fake being a true saint.

Definitely. The real problem I saw was that people used religion not just to convince themselves that they were doing right, but to convince others of the same.

The Church looks for whatever is good/truthful in everyone and everything. All it claims for itself is that the true subsists within it and that only because of the charism of the Holy Spirit and not due to any man’s goodness, except Christ’s, of course. Some things simply are true and some thing simply are false. We can’t ditch truth to appease falsehood because it then becomes evil rather than goodness.

I was referring not to how ideas are treated but to how people were treated. People are not true or false. Nor are we to judge other people’s hearts. I object to people who want to isolate themselves in their little enclaves of holiness, and look down on those outside.

The reward of heaven is like the reward of the wedding day. It’s not something one earns but it is something one works towards with joyful anticipation. Our “reward” is union with God–to be one with he who made us and loved us. It’s not about gaining brownie point. And purgatory is about justice–we must pay for the temporal damage our sins did to others. This is only fair. We can avoid this by penance and almsgiving–helping others in need instead of thinking only of ourselves and what we want.

I understand it in principle, but…it’s still hard. It’s like believing in heaven and hell makes it impossible to just do things, without thinking about the moral value of everything all the time.

Every person, male or female, has the same dignity, that is right and true. Men and women are equally intelligent and capable, as well. There is nothing in Church teaching that states otherwise. Men have some ministries that are reserved for them but that is a matter of authority not of dignity. Many women have had great authority in the Church, even over men, but the ministral duties God has assigned to men because of Adam’s failure and because God chose to come among us as a man–to make right what the first man made wrong. Anyway, if you’d like to discuss this issue via PM, please feel free to contact me.

I was just using that as an example. It took me quite some time to understand, because the people I was used to used “the dignity of women” as a contrast to “masculine dignity.” It was basically just the enforcement of ‘traditional’ gender roles; it was undignified for a woman to support her family, or a man to stay home with the children.

How very true. Becoming a Catholic means, among other things, learning a whole new “language” if you will, because many of the things we saw in our churches didn’t match what they said. In the Catholic Church, there seems to be an understanding of the importance of language and generally speaking, what they say is what they mean, and how they live. The Church teaching is Truth. 100% Truth. Where we came from, maybe it was, maybe it wasn’t. This means reprogramming you mind, if you will, and basically throwing out all you knew as a Prot. and starting over with the real meaning of things.

One of my “loaded phrases” is “now we’re going to pray for a new outpouring of the Holy Spirit”. I hear phrases like that, and immediately I picture everyone lining up to have someone lay hands on them and - very loudly - calling down the Holy Spirit, while pushing backwards on their forehead. And everyone watching to see who is going up and who is not. Imagine my surprise when it came time for that prayer, and the mission leader simply said something along the lines of, “God we ask for a fresh outpouring of the Holy Spirit on this church. Amen.” That was it. Okay, there might have been a couple more sentences said, but basically, that was it. No lines, no noise, no nothing. I think that’s when I really began to realize that what I had experienced in the Prot. world was nothing like the way it’s supposed to be. And I’ve been a Catholic for over 8 years. Give yourself some time. You’ll get there.
Kris

Yes, definitely this idea. It’s I think so much of an issue for me because of my own background that I would fairly call spiritual abuse. The issues with women’s roles are one of the more obvious things, but there were others. It can make it extremely difficult to get through. I come from a world of very strict, often unspoken, rules. Most Christian phrases had a double meaning. E.g. the concept of scandal was hard to get my head around, because I was always being told to not do this or that or the other so people wouldn’t get the wrong idea. Don’t drink because people might think you’re abusing alcohol, don’t wear a strapless dress because someone might wonder about what’s under it. Or the talk about holiness had the undercurrent of “don’t spend time with people who aren’t as holy as we are.”

I’m coming in with a heavy load of fear and guilt and shame from Christianity. I can barely even listen to certain topics. And it’s even harder because most places I go seem to want to retreat to little sound-bites and avoid those of us that have actually been hurt. Even in my current area I feel like a pariah a lot of times - it’s everywhere I go.

 

[Della]

Definitely. The real problem I saw was that people used religion not just to convince themselves that they were doing right, but to convince others of the same.

This is spiritual abuse, which is why Jesus was so hard on those who practiced it.

I was referring not to how ideas are treated but to how people were treated. People are not true or false. Nor are we to judge other people’s hearts. I object to people who want to isolate themselves in their little enclaves of holiness, and look down on those outside.

Yes, the “us vs. them” syndrome. As a former AoGer I know just what you mean.

I understand it in principle, but…it’s still hard. It’s like believing in heaven and hell makes it impossible to just do things, without thinking about the moral value of everything all the time.

Coming from the background that we both did, purgatory can be difficult to grasp. But, as I prayed about it and simply let such concepts “sink in” eventually I came to understand what it is and, perhaps, more importantly, what it isn’t. You will too.

I was just using that as an example. It took me quite some time to understand, because the people I was used to used “the dignity of women” as a contrast to “masculine dignity.” It was basically just the enforcement of ‘traditional’ gender roles; it was undignified for a woman to support her family, or a man to stay home with the children.

Such stereotyping of women has its roots in the reformation, much more than in Catholic culture. Before the reformation women had businesses and were in guilds and held positions of authority. It was the reformers who eliminated all that.

Yes, definitely this idea. It’s I think so much of an issue for me because of my own background that I would fairly call spiritual abuse. The issues with women’s roles are one of the more obvious things, but there were others. It can make it extremely difficult to get through. I come from a world of very strict, often unspoken, rules. Most Christian phrases had a double meaning. E.g. the concept of scandal was hard to get my head around, because I was always being told to not do this or that or the other so people wouldn’t get the wrong idea. Don’t drink because people might think you’re abusing alcohol, don’t wear a strapless dress because someone might wonder about what’s under it. Or the talk about holiness had the undercurrent of “don’t spend time with people who aren’t as holy as we are.”

These narrow man-made definitions of scandal truly are bad–phariseeism of the worst sort. Everyone was always judging others by outward appearances. Not good–not good at all. It spoils the true definition of the word scandal and injures people both spiritually and psychologically.

I’m coming in with a heavy load of fear and guilt and shame from Christianity. I can barely even listen to certain topics. And it’s even harder because most places I go seem to want to retreat to little sound-bites and avoid those of us that have actually been hurt. Even in my current area I feel like a pariah a lot of times - it’s everywhere I go.

It’s not Christianity’s fault but rather those who abuse it and whose definition of it are skewed that has caused your difficulty. When I was in the AoG I thought there was nothing else and that it was the very definition of Christianity, too, but it’s not. Their brand of the Christian faith is truncated and skewed. It has just enough truth to be plausable but it’s self-serving instead of forcing one to face the truth about oneself.

This set ups a false idea about what we’re supposed to be as Christians and hurts us deeply. I know from my own experience of it. For a long time I couldn’t read the Bible because it had been poisoned by the interpretation the AoG put on it. I was full of anger for quite a while and had no one I could talk to about it–this was back in the 90’s before the great influx of converts into the Church. The first priest I tried to talk to about what I’d been through hadn’t clue what I was talking about because it was so far outside his thinking and experience. So, I sympathize with you. The more you immerse yourself in Catholic teaching, theology, philosophy of life and practice the more you’ll be released from the horrors of the past. You are in my prayers.

 

[klm120861]

I’m coming in with a heavy load of fear and guilt and shame from Christianity. I can barely even listen to certain topics. And it’s even harder because most places I go seem to want to retreat to little sound-bites and avoid those of us that have actually been hurt. Even in my current area I feel like a pariah a lot of times - it’s everywhere I go.

What you experienced, and Della and I as AoG’ers experienced, wasn’t Christianity. It was there brand of it. I always felt like there was this set of rules, and when I looked at it honestly, even Jesus himself didn’t measure up. He just got a free pass because he was the Son of God.

I don’t know which Sacraments you will be receiving at Easter, but here’s a few things that might help. First, if you have been baptized, every sin you ever committed prior to your baptism both mortal and venial, original and actual has been washed away. By virtue of your baptism, you are saved and your soul is indelibly marked as belonging to God.

If you haven’t been baptized yet, that’s what will happen, and, objectively, you will have nothing left to feel guilty about. In Catholic reality, you probably have a whole lot less to feel guilty about now than you think.

If you have been baptized, you will be making your first confession. Prayerfully prepare. Make an appointment for it. Let them know you will be making your first confession. Don’t do it as part of a communal Lenten confession. Confess every mortal sin you can remember from the time you were baptized until that day. Confess every venial sin that comes to mind as well. Basically, if you think it, say it. The priest will help guide you through. Confess the fear, the guily, the anger, confess all of it. Truly unburden yourself. You aren’t talking to the priest, you’re talking to Jesus, the gentle Good Shepherd who wants nothing more than to bind your wounds and have you come to know the beautiful daughter of God that you are. After assigning you your penance, the priest will then pray:
God, the Father of mercies, through the death and the resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God five you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. From that point on, anytime you start to feel guilty about anything, just say the following: “Satan, I was absolved of all of my sins by the blood of Jesus through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. I have nothing to feel guilty about. I remand you to Jesus for him to deal with.” Guilt is Satan’s favorite weapon to keep us from the freedom of Christ.

Begin to read the Gospels, especially the stories of Jesus healing and forgiving people. My favorite is the Woman Caught in Adultery in John 8. When you read it, picture Jesus interacting with her the way you would like him to interact with you. Once the two of them are alone and all of her accusers have left, hear him gently and softly say, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” Picture her hanging her head, afraid, terrified to look him in the eye because she is afraid of the condemnation she thinks she will see, as she chokes out the words, “No one, sir.” Now picture Jesus reaching out, tenderly raising her chin. She slowly raises her eyes to his. His hand cups her cheek. “Neither do I condemn you.” He hugs her, not inappropriately, but as if she is the most precious and beautiful of all of God’s creation. She gradually returns the hug and he whispers in her ear, “Go, [and] from now on do not sin any more.” She nods, whispers, “thank you.” And walks away. He watches her go. As she walks away, her shoulders begin to come back. She stands a little straighter. A smile blooms on her face. The burden is gone. All of a sudden she realizes that she really is a beautiful, precious child of God. She turns the corner and disappears from view. Only when she is out of sight does Jesus turn and walk away.

Read the Gospels with that Jesus active in them. Not the Jesus you and I were raised with. We were raised with a lie.

May Saint Raphael pour out God’s healing oil on your body, mind and soul, my dear one.
Kris