Who do they ask to be Annulment Witnesses?

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Worthy_Of_Love

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Will it be family from his side and mine…friends…who?
Cause i can garuantee HIS side will flip about it and not agree to give any information. (would that hurt my annulment?) Catholics, to my husbands side of the family, are pure evil incarnate…i could go on about their opinions but i dont want to offend. Cause i think they are all insane…really im serious…they are crazy! My husband, even knowing that ive visited my local parish many times lately im sure hed want to burn me at the stake as a heretic! If the Church tells me that our marriage was never valid and i could eventually remarry 😃 would just make him SOOOO MAD!!! 😃
And when one starts an annulment process what does one do? Just go to the Priest in the Parish and say, i would like an annulment…can you help me? Or is there something else i must do? Im not catholic…for those who dont know. Interested though…looking into it.
 
You select the witness that you would like to testify, and your ex has the opportunity to select witnesses that he would like to testify. If he fails to cooperate, the tribunal will make a judgment based on the (name removed by moderator)ut from you and your witnesses alone.

You basically go to your priest to start the annulment process, or you can go directly to the diocese’s tribunal. One question is why you want a Catholic annulment if you are not Catholic? Are you planning to convert, or perhaps you want to remarry to a Catholic?
 
I found out he has been gay for 10 years - 3 1/2 years of marriage and 2 kids later! So, basically i dont want any tie to him at ALL!

Plus, i firmly believe that you ARE married till death do you part. I am very much a family person and thats what i WANT! Eventually if i find the right person YES i want to be ABLE to marry definitely. I have been studying and looking into the Catholic faith a lot lately. I was raised protestant but have always felt something was missing. There is a lot of symbolic stuff but not much has concrete meaning past symbolism to it ya know? Catholic faith has more REALism to everything. Puts more emphasis into it and i like that. Gives it deeper purpose.
So, a possiblity of converting.i think so:) well see. I like what ive learned so far.
Thanks for responding
 
Since you say “my husband”, etc. Please note that (at least in the USA) the annulment process does not begin until after a civil divorce is complete. If I am wrong, I hope somebody will correct me.

You also seem to be pleased if something will inflict some pain or discomfort on “your husband”. I hope that you will find comfort in a real faith in Jesus Christ. Forgiveness begins with yourself. You must forgive others in order to be forgiven. That can be difficult. Forgiveness does not mean that you open yourself up to being injured again. I think part of forgiveness means that you do not want to hurt or inflict pain on the one who hurt you.

I am also only on the way to becoming Catholic. For me, there is a lot of beauty in the Church. But I know that there are a lot of people who say they are Catholic, but have opinions that are not very Catholic.

You mention that you are going to the Catholic Church many times lately. And I hope you are meeting with a Priest who is helping you.

From what you say, if your husband had hid his gay life from you (and if he was sexually active as a gay man), then I personally would agree with you in deciding to not take him back. Don’t allow him to live under the same roof any more. Go and get your civil divorce if you haven’t done so already. And if he was sexually active and gay before your marriage (and had kept this hid from you at that time), then I think that this is a clear case – that the marriage was not a marriage as the Catholic Church defines marriage. And I think you would get an annulment. So be patient.
 
ONe thing I have not heard mentioned here, as many times as we have discussed this topic [please search for previous threads on annulment, they will help answer a lot of your questions], is that the entire process can be incredibly healing for the parties, their children and their families. Like any other loss, there is a grieving process to go through and this can assist with that process.

The key is to separate the pain and grief that arise from the conditions that caused the divorce or the problems within the marriage, from the natural grief inherent in finding out, or confirming that what you thought was marriage, was not in fact a true marriage. Some people tend to “blame the messenger” and accuse the Church for causing pain by issuing a decree of nullity (or not) when in fact the pain has its source in the conditions and situation surrounded the marriage.
 
From what you say, if your husband had hid his gay life from you (and if he was sexually active as a gay man), then I personally would agree with you in deciding to not take him back. Don’t allow him to live under the same roof any more. Go and get your civil divorce if you haven’t done so already. And if he was sexually active and gay before your marriage (and had kept this hid from you at that time), then I think that this is a clear case – that the marriage was not a marriage as the Catholic Church defines marriage. And I think you would get an annulment. So be patient.This was music to my ears i certainly hope the Priest thinks the same way!!
My divorce will be final on the 24th…TWO WEEKS!
I dont want to inflict pain on him…im not mean like that. Just i know how he feels about the Catholics. It would make him mad. But im not doing this for him im doing it for me. Thank you so much.
 
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puzzleannie:
ONe thing I have not heard mentioned here, as many times as we have discussed this topic [please search for previous threads on annulment, they will help answer a lot of your questions], is that the entire process can be incredibly healing for the parties, their children and their families. Like any other loss, there is a grieving process to go through and this can assist with that process.
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This is exactly what my sister’s priest told her. I am Canadian and my sister is in the process of her annulment. Before she even started, my priest told me to find something that was existent prior to the marriage and after…that would build a good case.

I am one of her witnesses. The funny part is that there is one other witness on HIS side of the family. It would be HIS aunt. But you can choose either way, whoever would be supportive of you and give an honest testimony to the tribunal. My sister is half way through hers and now, she has to get her civil divorce which is almost paid and then she could go back to the tribunal.

Mu sster just went to the rectory and talked to one of the priests there and he sent her to the diocesan marriage tribunal. Everything is done in confidence. Have no fear.

If your husband does not respond, well, then the tribunal goes on without him and they give the verdict without him. He would lose his chance…

The best of everything and trust in the Lord as He is the one that knows all about it. Pray about it and for it… smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/17/17_1_10.gif

Blessings,
Shoshana
 
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puzzleannie:
ONe thing I have not heard mentioned here, as many times as we have discussed this topic [please search for previous threads on annulment, they will help answer a lot of your questions], is that the entire process can be incredibly healing for the parties, their children and their families. Like any other loss, there is a grieving process to go through and this can assist with that process.

The key is to separate the pain and grief that arise from the conditions that caused the divorce or the problems within the marriage, from the natural grief inherent in finding out, or confirming that what you thought was marriage, was not in fact a true marriage. Some people tend to “blame the messenger” and accuse the Church for causing pain by issuing a decree of nullity (or not) when in fact the pain has its source in the conditions and situation surrounded the marriage.
Click to expand...
 
Worthy Of Love:
Will it be family from his side and mine…friends…who?
Cause i can garuantee HIS side will flip about it and not agree to give any information. (would that hurt my annulment?) Catholics, to my husbands side of the family, are pure evil incarnate…i could go on about their opinions but i dont want to offend. Cause i think they are all insane…really im serious…they are crazy! My husband, even knowing that ive visited my local parish many times lately im sure hed want to burn me at the stake as a heretic! If the Church tells me that our marriage was never valid and i could eventually remarry 😃 would just make him SOOOO MAD!!! 😃
And when one starts an annulment process what does one do? Just go to the Priest in the Parish and say, i would like an annulment…can you help me? Or is there something else i must do? Im not catholic…for those who dont know. Interested though…looking into it.
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Yes, go talk to your priest to get it started. Based on subsequent posts on this thread regarding his homosexuality, you probably do have a good case for annulment. This would be deception on his part-- entering the marriage under false pretenses. An on your part being deceived on a material fact that had you known would have caused you to not get married is grounds.

Get a book on annulments, it will explain the various grounds.
 
Worthy Of Love:
Will it be family from his side and mine…friends…who?
Cause i can garuantee HIS side will flip about it and not agree to give any information. (would that hurt my annulment?) . . .
Click to expand...
Start with your parish priest, but try to get referred to someone with experience in dealing with the Tribunal. Each Tribunal has its own preferences in how you do it.

You need three or four people who can, and will, give accurate witness to conditions existing at the time of your marriage. Someone on the Tribunal can advise you how many are needed - it is not a fixed number. You need enough to present a convincing case. Any more just invites trouble when they fail to respond.

Pick people who will willing to respond, and will do so relatively quickly. The Tribunal is very busy and will not pursue witnesses. They are willing to wait indefinitely for responses. You will have to do any follow up to ensure the responses are submitted.
 
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