Why am I so scrupulous?

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JackVk

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As usual, I’m getting into this same old cycle where I think everything is a sin. I recently got a brown scapular, so I’ve made a commitment to pray the rosary every day. I feel like I am sinning and letting God down unless I’m praying or reading theology. I get the idea that eating is bad because there are people starving elsewhere in the world. I also feel like anything secular is blasphemous. I even get to thinking that having emotions of my own is a sin.

This is about as simple as I can explain it. I know you don’t have to be a Puritan drone to follow God, but it feels like everything is a potential threat to my relationship with Him. How can I get rid of this? I want to worship and serve God, but not through xenophobia and paranoia.
 
Almost everyone has to deal with scrupulosity at some point. You’re far from alone!

Remember that during the Transfiguration (Luke 9:28-37), Peter proposed that the apostles remain with Jesus, Moses and Elijah on Mount Tabor. The Father spoke briefly and then everything was as it was before the event had occurred: just the apostles and Jesus. Then Jesus went down from the mountain and the surely disappointed Peter and the Apostles followed.

Now why did Christ do that? Why can’t we just do what Peter wanted to do: pitch a tent outside the adoration chapel and never go into the world again? Well, you and I were created for a purpose. We are supposed to come down off the mountain and live out our vocation. Of course the mountain—the sacraments, devotions, certainly adoration—is there so that we have a place to withdraw and recharge. But this isn’t heaven yet and there’s work to be done right here on Planet Earth. So at some point we must come down from Mount Tabor and get to work.

The devil would rather that you be so paralyzed by fear that you cannot live out your vocation. As a Catholic Christian following after Jesus, you are a threat to the devil. So you should expect the devil will attack you with all sorts of lies to get you into despair. Scrupulosity is not having too much devotion—it’s not being devoted to the right things. To be devoted to Christ, you also need to be devoted to your earthly mission, the reason why God sent YOU into the world.

If scrupulosity is a constant concern, don’t try to handle it alone. The next time you go to confession, you can mention your scrupulosity. Priests have to deal with this issue a lot and so you are sure to get good advice. You could also bring it up with your family and spiritual director, or anyone else you trust to encourage you. Don’t forget you have friends in heaven, too. I highly recommend St. Dymphna.

Fight the good fight!
 
Oh, yes, good deeds is another thing that has me lost. I’ve started giving money to charity because of Thanksgiving and Christmas. I feel like if I’m not giving my whole paycheck, I’m holding out and being a tightwad.
 
It really sounds to me as though you’re dealing with OCD. You might want to consider a psychiatrist or psychologist.
 
JackVk said:
As usual, I’m getting into this same old cycle where I think everything is a sin. I recently got a brown scapular, so I’ve made a commitment to pray the rosary every day. I feel like I am sinning and letting God down unless I’m praying or reading theology. I get the idea that eating is bad because there are people starving elsewhere in the world. I also feel like anything secular is blasphemous. I even get to thinking that having emotions of my own is a sin.

This is about as simple as I can explain it. I know you don’t have to be a Puritan drone to follow God, but it feels like everything is a potential threat to my relationship with Him. How can I get rid of this? I want to worship and serve God, but not through xenophobia and paranoia.
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First off…get a regular confessor…such is very important with scruples.

With your confessor you can learn to recognize and act against scruples…

and he can give you principles to help (there are very good principles that have been used to help those in your boat)

Conscience is about reason…not feelings of fear or doubt…

Scruples are largely fears…“the doubting disease” the French call it…for it is all about fear and unreasonable doubts…

Scruples are to be dismissed… Scruples are to be treated like a hissing goose or a barking dog…one does not stop and argue with either of those does one?? no one keeps walking (advice from a 15th Century Carthusian)…

And turn to Jesus the Good Shepherd…he knows you loves you and in him is true life. He is your hope…focus more on following him joyfully…and trusting him (like a sheep 🙂

Pray often perhaps something like…

“Jesus Good Shepherd, I believe in you, I hope in you, I love you.”

May Mary the Star of Hope lighten your sky
 
Et_Cetera said:
It really sounds to me as though you’re dealing with OCD. You might want to consider a psychiatrist or psychologist.
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I’ve been going to a psychiatrist for ADD for years, and they have never diagnosed me with OCD.
 
So, JackVk, what happens when someone shows you that your ideas are not correct? If it’s a priest or teacher or parent, do you trust the person to guide you correctly and accept what they tell you? Or is your scrupulosity so ingrained that you cannot get free of it even with education? Your answer to this will help determine what kind of assistance you need.
 
I think what Et cetera means is that scrupulosity is a form of anxiety driven obsessive thought.

The advice that you have had regarding having a good confessor is good, but would also add that you should mention it to your psychiatrist too.

God bless
 
Fran65 said:
Ibut would also add that you should mention it to your psychiatrist too.

God bless
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Thought take care…some will not respect what the Church teaches regarding morality…and put teachings of the Church in the area of scruples…or give the person a way to treat the problem that is immoral…so make sure one has a Catholic person who accepts the teachings of the Church or at least respects them…and one is working with a Priest who can say “yes you can use this method” etc…

Having studying some Psychology …this can happen…get help…but take care…have a good confessor / Spiritual director…
 
JackVk said:
How can I get rid of this?
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You need to be under the care of a qualified psychologist for any OCD or other issues you have, and a spiritual director/priest who is trained to help people with scrupulosity. This is not something you do on your own. You need professional help.
 
1ke said:
You need to be under the care of a qualified psychologist for any OCD or other issues you have, and a spiritual director/priest who is trained to help people with scrupulosity. This is not something you do on your own. You need professional help.
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Well, most of this is in thought and not action.
 
JackVk said:
As usual, I’m getting into this same old cycle where I think everything is a sin. I recently got a brown scapular, so I’ve made a commitment to pray the rosary every day. I feel like I am sinning and letting God down unless I’m praying or reading theology. I get the idea that eating is bad because there are people starving elsewhere in the world. I also feel like anything secular is blasphemous. I even get to thinking that having emotions of my own is a sin.

This is about as simple as I can explain it. I know you don’t have to be a Puritan drone to follow God, but it feels like everything is a potential threat to my relationship with Him. How can I get rid of this? I want to worship and serve God, but not through xenophobia and paranoia.
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Jack,
Sin is a deliberate turning away from God. You will most definitely know it if you have sinned!
God does not want you to be obsessing whether or not you are committing a sin.
All he wants is for you to love Him, You cannot sin if you are not even aware whatever it is that you are doing is sinful!
What I am absolutely convinced of is that the more one tries to love God, the harder Satan tries to confuse that person." Everything is a sin, there is no way I can please God" would be your next thought and before you know it , you have given up trying altogether and Satan is well pleased with the day’s work!
Relax.
God loves you!
Merry Christmas!
 
I had/have scruples too…I didn’t know I had them until a priest pointed it out to me that I was going to confession too much and a lot of my sins were venial at best and you can receive forgiveness by receiving Holy Communion…I don’t have a spiritual director and can’t seem to find anyone to do it so just try and examine your own conscious and try praying the Divine Mercy Chaplet. Your not alone…read the Little Flowers diary, she had scruples real bad and she turned out OK…
 
It’s easy for me to type you a response but it’s not easy live what you preach.
I’d talk to a priest if i were you, and maybe spend some time in Adoration.

You dont need a psychiatrist for scruples, just talk to a priest.
I recently got a brown scapular, so I’ve made a commitment to pray the rosary every day.
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“These commitments are made with the best of best intentions but are almost impossible to keep without God’s grace.” Did you know that, with a priests permission you could devoutly kiss your scapular everyday in place of praying the rosary?
I also feel like anything secular is blasphemous.
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That’s not a scuple it’s the truth. You can’t even watch a television show without being bombarded with lust,pride, envy, and everything else sinful.
I even get to thinking that having emotions of my own is a sin.
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Did you know that St. Bernadette was really upset with the way biographers portray the saints. They make them seem so untouchable and without human feelings. St Phillip Neri had a terrible anger problem and you never hear about it. So did St. Peter the Apostle, so did St. Jerome, and Bl. Elizabeth of the Trinity and so did countless of others.

What im trying to say is that we all have human defects and problems, we can only change with God’s grace.

Read the Little Flower’s diary just as Sanctifiable suggested, it changed my life.
 
Read the Little Flower’s diary just as Sanctifiable suggested, it changed my life
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I’m over half ways done with it and it is slowly changing my way of thinking too.
 
We have all been afraid of not doing the right thing and especially of sin because we know we are selfish and sometimes we focus too much on “rights and wrongs”, is this a sin, is that a sin ? No one needs to tell us we are guilty as we know it instinctively. But we are not to live like we live according to the law. Remember what He said, “Be not afraid” ----

The key thing I prefer to concentrate on as I have matured, is that Christ’s sacrifice was for us. It’s based on his love for mankind. We are to believe on him as through him there is forgiveness of sins. We know this from the CC teachings. Ultimately it is through his grace or unmerited favor that we are forgiven and we know we are loved by him. He simply loves us. We are not used to this at all but it is the truth. He showed us the way and we are to follow his example and love one another and to serve. In the mean time we have still not matured to the level he did but we strive to none the less and yes he still loves us. It is the most amazing thing that he left his thrown in heaven and came here as a servant to die for a bunch of monkeys.

Great is the Lord — as Catholics we should lead the way — in the mean time we all need to learn to become his servant and to keep the sacraments — and put put away the natural man — when we sin he forgives us through confession —
 
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