Why are Protestant Churches more friendly, helpful, and community oriented?

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Disheartened

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One of my complaints about the Catholic Church is that it’s unfriendly and not a very good community. I read posts here that say that Protestants are phoney and have just as many problems, and that you don’t go to church to feel good. But I think that Protestants have a lot on the ball. They offer more youth activities and church socials. We should be socializing within the Church. That feeling of community is an important thing, more important to some than others obviously. It’s also a big reason why people like myself are tempted to leave the church, because it’s not the greatest social support system.

I see my fellow Catholics getting involved in all sorts of other activities outside of church, but nothing’s happening in the church. Small Baptist churches will have a church van or bus and everyone takes field trips together. They have vibrant youth groups where kids can have wholesome fun and give the parents a break too. I wish the Catholic Church provided things like that more.
 
Because Catholics come to Church focused on God. We focus our worship only on God. That is why the Crucifix is at center and the Altar also to represent the last supper and Calvary.

Unfortunately many Catholics do ignore others as they are focused on God when they are at Church, this is actually preferable since we are supposed to focus on God when we worship, the time for community is afterward. That is where many Catholics fall short as our worship is designed to focus on God which sometimes keeps Catholics on that state of mind even after Mass.

Most non-catholic churches have a preacher center and music surrounding him which focuses on the auditory aspect and community aspect of their churches. So they excel at community and fellowship, which Catholics are supposed to do in the parish hall and afterward.

God Bless
Scylla
 
Thats really very true, I have noticed in my few times to mass that people dont come in talking. But afterwards there is fellowship. There are pros and cons to both churchs and there will always be hypocrates.
 
Your right, just because Catholics focus their worship primarily on God does not make it wrong. Just because we put Jesus at the center and remember His sacrifice for us every day does not make it wrong.

What Catholics do need to work on is the outside fellowship that so many others are good at. Heck even the Jehovah’s Witnesses are great at fellowship outside of their services. And even more friendly than some of the Protestant Churches after services that I have been to. That doesn’t make them true, but that doesn’t make fellowship wrong. It is something that some groups focus on and excel at which we need to emulate, but never to the detriment of our worship, this should take place outside of Church.

That is the reason for having a Parish Hall which many times these days is underused and for some reason neglected. It is there for fellowship, Bible study and generally bringing together the community. I think that Catholics sometimes are scared to do that even though that is why we have Parish Halls for community. That is why we need people who are involved who like to do the community stuff.

I am part of a Bible study at my Church which meets in the Parish Hall each Friday.

God Bless
Scylla
 
Ruth17 said:
Thats really very true, I have noticed in my few times to mass that people dont come in talking. But afterwards there is fellowship. There are pros and cons to both churchs and there will always be hypocrates.
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my protestant friends tell me how boring the Mass is and how they come out of Church on an emotional and spiritual high and how much fun their services are. i tell them i come out of mass in awe-after all i had just held and consumed the Body and Blood of the creator of the Universe. Ill take that any day over being “amused”
 
Disheartened said:
One of my complaints about the Catholic Church is that it’s unfriendly and not a very good community. I read posts here that say that Protestants are phoney and have just as many problems, and that you don’t go to church to feel good. But I think that Protestants have a lot on the ball. They offer more youth activities and church socials. We should be socializing within the Church. That feeling of community is an important thing, more important to some than others obviously. It’s also a big reason why people like myself are tempted to leave the church, because it’s not the greatest social support system.

I see my fellow Catholics getting involved in all sorts of other activities outside of church, but nothing’s happening in the church. Small Baptist churches will have a church van or bus and everyone takes field trips together. They have vibrant youth groups where kids can have wholesome fun and give the parents a break too. I wish the Catholic Church provided things like that more.
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That is an excellent question. I haven’t seen a van or bus or a vibrant youth group. It’s not that it hasn’t been tried. I took my confirmation class out for pizza…to the movies…and they loved it. I had good parent participation too. These same kids told me how they were always being invited to Sunday Nite Live at the Baptist church with just over 70 kids attending every Sunday night, they always asked, how come we don’t do that?

Our DRE decided that the candidates would do “lock-ins”. It was a huge success. I have moved from there…but I am hoping these kinds of activities are still going on.

I know bob the reason we go to church is to focus on God. But we “gather” as a community at His house. Then we leave and go our separate ways…how can that be a good thing. I do know that the Baptist church has Wednesday night bible studies…and bible study is also offered once a week in the home. Every age group has a Sunday School…pre-school, school-age, tweens, teens, college age…young singles…young marrieds…married with children…empty nesters…and seniors. Where is that in the Catholic Church? I never really thought about until recently…reflecting back on the kids asking questions…I just figured that Catholics don’t do that. (of course I didnt’ tell them that). The lock-ins were great…but it was only for confirmation candidates. Once these kids graduated from high school…you don’t see them again until it’s time to get married. Makes you wonder why? No, not all went away to college.

There was a (excuse the spelling) a Kionawa’s club for singles…but most of the single women were in their 40’s…and the single men were pushing 70…not much fun.

Yes there is the Hibernian…and the Knights of Columbus…but that is a “male” organization…yes, there is a Sister’s of Columbus…but it’s mostly filled with seniors…20 somethings are not interested.

IMHO…I think church community groups might encourage more vocations. Just a thought. I know you will disagree with me on all counts anyway.
 
Hi,

I have to be honest with you guys. I know I never say anything mean on this forum because that is not Christ-like, but Im a little angry and I feel I have to speak up. Please bear with me:(

I am so sick of catholics saying the protestant or non-denoms services are only focused on entertainment and that we do not focus our worship on God. That is SO FAR FROM THE TRUTH!:mad: So we sing praise music so what! We are being joyful in our worship to the Lord. Worship does not have to be solemn and quiet to be worthy of praising the Lord. We are to be joyful and what better way then to sing to Him with clapping if one so chooses. We are showing God how much we love and worship Him. Both styles of worship are fine.😃

I have seen this said SOOOOO many times on this forum that I just couldnt take it anymore.:mad:

I would appreciate it if you guys would understand that we do focus our worship on God we just do it in a more vivacious way. I dont see that worshipping in our style is any less of a way of worshipping then the CC way.

Ok my rant is over;)
 
When I go to Mass, I usually see several people that I know. We sort of smile and say “Hi”, but not much more than that because we are really not there at that time to socialize. It seems like once we bless ourselves after walking in the door, our thoughts are more turned towards worship and prayer. I know though if I see these same people elsewhere, at Bible study, at one of the schools, a scout meeting, or Target or the grocery store, then we always stop to chat and be friendly. Mass just doesn’t seem like the time for that.

As far as being helpful and supportive, I have found the people to be extremely helpful and supportive. I am going through a divorce right now and I have gotten many prayers, cards, thoughtful emails and calls as well as offers to watch my kids or help out in any way possible. My church has totally been there for me. Maybe some of that has been because I have shared with people what I am going through.

My next door neighbor is a stay at home mom of four with a husband in Iraq and a very tight budget because they really took on too much of a mortgage. Their house needed all sorts of work and the church has arranged to have some plumbing work done, a new shower installed, the roof repaired, and the yard relandscaped. This is probably because my neighbor let them know what her needs were. Her husband isn’t Catholic, but he has been so impressed by the kindness and generosity of the parishoners that he is considering converting. I gave him some books to read while he is in Iraq.

As well we have ministries that welcome new parishoners with baskets of home baked goodies and info, that cook for sick parishoners or those who have just given birth, that provide meals at the church for the homeless, that assist those with unexpected pregnancies, etc, etc. Every year almost 200 familes at our church work with the Saint Francis Center in downtown Los Angeles to provide very generous “baskets” of food at Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter. Every year over 100 high schoolers give up their Spring break to go down to Mexico and build homes for needy families.

I wrote in another thread about my daughter’s former CCD teacher inviting some teenaged girls into her home every week to discuss morality and making good choices. She is totally close to all of the girls she has gone to religious ed with over the years.

So, while I realize that no one is running up to hug me (very often) at Mass, I don’t think that my church is unfriendly, I just think we have our priorities straight at Mass.
 
Some parishes are more outgoing that others. I know one that has a salaried staff that provides food and other assistance to anyone in need, no questions asked. Their Boy Scout troop includes Protestants of many stripes, Jews, Muslims, and at least a couple of agnostics, in addition to Catholics (they are a little biased against certain nationalities, Catholic or not:( ).
We have in California a Benedictine monastery that is looked upon as a valuable asset to the entire community, even by the local Southern Baptist minister who admits that he was formerly very anti-Catholic. These monks were asked to have one of their members run for public office…he would have probably won if he’d done so:clapping: .
 
Back to the topic,

Our church focuses on community outreach programs. We want to tell everyone the Good News about Jesus Christ. All of our programs include the salvation message.

Of course we start from within our own church family and then reach out to the community. I think our church is thriving is because when people come to visit they see how good we treat each other. I still remember whi I met my first day at my church 3 years ago. I remember because they came up to me to introduce themselves and welcome me to church.

I think what drew me into staying was the kindness of the people and the church doctrine was what I believed as well.

It is 100% correct to worship God at church, but we also have to keep in mind that Jesus wants us to show love to people and if we dont do that at church why on earth would you expect someone to stay:eek:

As for the kid thing-- Kids need to be entertained. You could tell me till your blue in the face that children need to learn how to sit in Mass and learn all about the catholic church and they have to do it in a solemn respectful way and I would say (that is why you lose them:eek: ) it has to be fun!!! When kids get bored, you will lose them. They will shut off their minds so fast and that is why kids leave the church. I dont know, maybe the protestant churches have a better grip on that.

I think if the CC would offer more programs like protestants do you would see more kids and adults staying:D

Im sorry if I have sounded harsh because I usually dont come on too strong. I guess I am having a particular nasty day.:o
 
I wasn’t suggesting that Mass be a big social hour, only that the Church should bring people together outside of Mass for community events. There’s not much going on. Other churches have more going on all week like someone said.

I think lively worship is fine, just because people praise God at church and feel good, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I also think that’s sort of an excuse, when Catholics say that we’re unfriendly because we’re so focused on God. I doubt if the average Catholic in the pew is in a mystical state of union with God the whole time they are there. From the sound of some of the things I’ve read on the internet, there is a big concern with how others behave in church, how their children behave, what they wear, and other subjects of concern. Everyone gets distracted in church, it’s only natural to notice other people.
 
So try and organize some of those things in your parish. Don’t bemoan, begin.
 
VociMike said:
So try and organize some of those things in your parish. Don’t bemoan, begin.
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That’s a good suggestion except I’m a very shy person and it’s not my gift in life to organize things. I’m very fearful of things like giving parties or organizing social events, it’s almost a phobia actually.
 
Disheartened said:
That’s a good suggestion except I’m a very shy person and it’s not my gift in life to organize things. I’m very fearful of things like giving parties or organizing social events, it’s almost a phobia actually.
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I’m pretty shy myself, but once you get involved, you start to lose some of that. Find something like Bible study, a prayer group, or a women’s club to get involved. You’ll notice that church gets a whole lot friendlier the more involved you are. You also don’t need to be a “leader” to make some of these suggestions, just be involved and make suggestions from time to time.
 
Disheartened said:
That’s a good suggestion except I’m a very shy person and it’s not my gift in life to organize things. I’m very fearful of things like giving parties or organizing social events, it’s almost a phobia actually.
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I know how you feel. But one must not focus on what a Church looks like, but on how well a Church holds on to the Faith that the Fathers taught. The Catholic Church is the only one that has it all true.

While, I love the Protestants and we can learn much from them, it still does not deny the fact that many of their churches do not follow what the Fathers taught. We must focus on what is orthodox teaching, we must stay with the truth, not because it is fun.

I advise you look here, you will see that the Church the early Fathers talked about, most represent the Catholic Church.🙂 :

www.newadvent.org/fathers/

Take a look at the Councils most especially.🙂
 
dulcissima said:
I’m pretty shy myself, but once you get involved, you start to lose some of that. Find something like Bible study, a prayer group, or a women’s club to get involved. You’ll notice that church gets a whole lot friendlier the more involved you are. You also don’t need to be a “leader” to make some of these suggestions, just be involved and make suggestions from time to time.
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There is YLI, maybe I’ll join it. Most of the women are older than me, the name of it is a big joke actually.
 
Disheartened said:
There is YLI, maybe I’ll join it. Most of the women are older than me, the name of it is a big joke actually.
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When I joined my Bible study class a couple of years ago, I was by far the youngest member. They were mostly older women. I quickly found out though that looks can be deceving, those older women were quick-witted, funny as can be, and dead-on right about so many things. I really didn’t feel so out of place after a couple of meetings. Then, as time has gone by some women my age have joined and it is really pretty nice. Plus, getting to know these older women makes me not feel afraid to get old. I know I will still be myself.
 
Good question. I can only remember when I went to Mass it was a regular routine: Go to Mass, say your prayers, go home. No socializing afterwards and the parish was so large you were just another participant and that was all.

I here that the RCC is trying to change this image. I hope it is true.
 
I would say that most, but not all, Catholics tend to keep their faith to themselves. I was on the Adult Education team at our Parish for several years, and time after time, the same 20 - 30 people would attend the talks we sponsored, and you would recognize these people because they all went to daily Mass. When the Parish would send out forms asking what the Parish really wanted, adult education was always one top thing the parishioners’ wishes. Why didn’t they ever show up? I don’t know. When we had Roslyn Moss speak, there were about 600 people there, but when we had a local priest or deacon speak, only the same 20 - 30 people would show up.
But then again our parish has several bible study groups that have been meeting weekly for 10 or more years, so there is the community spirit around.
My guess to the apparent difference between Catholic and Protestant churches is that in the Protestant churches the only the people who want to be there show up, while with Catholic’s, there is the quilt factor, you get a lot of people showing up to Mass, either out of fear of hell, or just because they know that they should show up, that if they were not Catholic, I think that they would not be showing up at all. But that is my opinion for what it is worth. (Not much)
I have attended different Protestant churches, both denominational and non-denominational, they had great music, great preaching, everyone seems to be very sociable, I could sense that their praise and worship was real. But for me, when they had their communion, I personally feel something missing. I missed Jesus being really present in the Eucharist. (I did not partake in their communion) It is a very strong feeling in me, and it made me feel sorry for them, for even though they have so much, they do not know what they are missing
 
See if your Priest can get you into a Bible study, if there is not one, ask him if he can help start one, There are a lot of good resources for Bible studies available, and the small sense of community will recharge your spiritual batteries.
 
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