I’ve never gone in for fighting for my religion as an adversarial activity. In fact, the things I’ve heard from religious friends of both sides who escaped from Belfast encourages me to “agree with thine enemy while in the midst.”* At least that way one knows what they are dealing with as distinct from “you have to listen to me because I KNOW I’m right because my Church is, so get with it!” If I heard such an attitude implied by a conversant, I might not be so ready to listen as to run.**
For my part, as long as I am in conversation with someone, a) I can stand my ground, b) I can learn what the concern of the other person is and can more appropriately address it, and c) taking St. Francis advice, I can preach the Gospel by act, and word if necessary. And ours isn’t the only way that advises forbearance over the incitement of opposition.
Perhaps it is a matter of my temperament, but I find opposition tends to cause entrenchment. If someone questions your faith, don’t you instinctively ground to our teachings? Why wouldn’t someone else? Therefore, if we can converse and find common ground, even if it is in a secular account of things, then we can at least have a respectful dialog.
*Jesus said, “Agree with thine adversary quickly, while thou art with him in the way; lest haply the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison. Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou have paid the last farthing” Matthew 5:25,26
** In the extreme, it comes to something like this: "So, look at your world that seems bent on revenge. The suicide bomber didn’t just wake up one morning in the middle of a joyful life and decide to go kill some people. That person, whoever it was, was living such a feeling of disempowerment, that the only access they had to anything that gave them even an opportunity to have a breath of air, in that moment, was a feeling of revenge. We agree, we don’t want them to get stuck in that feeling of revenge and then go kill themselves and other people. But we certainly understand how they got there. Nobody wants to feel powerless. And so, the suicide bombers are just those who are saying, “Well, I can do this one thing. You’ve taken away my power in this way, and in this way, and in this way, but there’s one thing you cannot take away from me: my power to take myself out and a bunch of other people with me, hopefully.” --Abraham H.
The way that many argue on here gives me the sense that they are so fearful and tenuous of their own position that they cannot even for a moment allow someone else the viewpoint they were perforce of their upbringing given. Adamantine insistence on one’s own rightness, especially by third party, in this case the Church, is personally suspicious to me. I don’t myself need someone else’s complicity as a verification of my belief. And I won’t give them my belief unless they ask in a way that indicates sincere inquiry as distinct from baiting. JDaniel’s additions seem to me as well gratuitous and self congratulating. Put on the other’s shoes, and don’t necessarily assume that someone’s different views or practices stem from a consciously deliberate evil, as sometimes appears to be implied on here. For my part, I believe that all will be justly sorted out at the end; my uninformed opinion of someone else’s difference may more go against me than bless the other. So I’d rather talk it out, granting the other what they came with and work for clarity.