Why can’t I stop this!?!

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I think the Enemy delights in our self-condemnation, an act that shows a lack of faith in God’s forgiveness. My best confessional scolding came when a priest wagged his finger at me for harboring too much guilt. Seeking counseling was part of my penance, lol!

When guilt is synonymous with conscience, it’s a good thing. It impels us to go to confession and reconcile our wrongdoings. When guilt becomes a parasite, perpetually taunting us, it’s unhealthy.
 
Precisely. We need to lean on God to get over these bad habits.
 
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Once for my penance, a priest told me to spend an hour before the altar thanking God for making me such a good person. I thought this unnecessarily severe.
 
Annie said:
Precisely. We need to lean on God to get over these bad habits.
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And if you lean on Jesus, he will lead you to others who can help heal you. And in my experience those other people are the lost and broken who need you.

Minister to those who need healing, and be healed.
 
1: you should not make vows like that. When you make vows compulsively, they aren’t binding.

2: Fast. Keep up your Marian Devtion. Develop devotion to the Sacred Heart. Make frequent use of Holy Water. Find a knowledgable and holy priest and use go to him exclusively for confession. Make known your problem to him, and ask him for advice. If you don’t already, I would suggest going to confession weekly at least. Pray the rosary, most importantly. Practice mental prayer daily for at least 15 minutes. You can find excellent sermons from traditional priests on how to practice mental prayer.

These are just some suggestions.
 
I doubt that those things would cause sexual perversion. I personally believe sexual perversion is caused by the lack of female friends. I used to fall into the sin of lust much more before I got some close female friends. Our society is very screwy because on one hand they want to stop the objectification of women, but they also objectify women at the same time. The only way to stop thinking of women as objects is to make some female friends. So get out there and befriend some ladies!
 
Melodeonist said:
Then make some male friends!
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And if you already have male friends? Having sexual fantasies about the opposite sex and being friends with them are not mutually exclusive, so that might not be the most practical advice. We don’t even know that the OP doesn’t already have female friends.
 
True, but seeing that the opposite sex has interests, personalities, and stuff helps humanize them. Sexual fantasies can happen, but once you realize it you think of your friends and stop. After all, sexual fantasies are creepy. 👀
 
Time, and maturity can have a positive effect.
Other people are really key to attaining purity. No one does it by himself. That’s part of Satan’s deception.
Whether that’s a counselor, accountability partner, or ministering to others depends on the situation.
 
We are very blessed in this day and age where even if the diocese doesn’t have a counselor in person, technology allows for us to find Catholic therapists through skype or telephone. I will pray that you find someone who can help you heal from all of the hurt you have been through.

It sounds like you got plenty of grief from other people, no need to pile more of that on yourself. We’re all human and just doing the best we can.

I never had a bad relationship with my mom, but I feel she did pass away much, much sooner than I had wanted. In the absence of having the mother I’ve needed in my life during some challenging times, I’ve come to Mary our Blessed Mother for motherly support and comfort in all my trials and weaknesses.

God bless you and may Mary embrace you. 💗
 
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Melodeonist said:
I doubt that those things would cause sexual perversion. I personally believe sexual perversion is caused by the lack of female friends. I used to fall into the sin of lust much more before I got some close female friends. Our society is very screwy because on one hand they want to stop the objectification of women, but they also objectify women at the same time. The only way to stop thinking of women as objects is to make some female friends. So get out there and befriend some ladies!
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Trust me they do, the pornography of this perversion is full of mother-son motifs. (and no, it’s not MILF I have, it’s something else) I do have quite a few female friends, including one who has been very helpful in, sort of correcting my view of women which had been messed up because of my experience. However all of these female friends are online, so I’m not sure if I should deepen my friendship with them or try to find some friends in my local. If I do try and find some female friends in local area, that’s going to be really hard for a number of reasons the two main ones being, 1) there almost no young people, let alone young women at either of the parishes I’ve attended in this diocese and 2) the place I’m most likely to meet up with young women are at my college, and needless to say, the vast majority of these people are total leftists!
 
Yes, have a close relationship with Mary is the main thing I have been doing to combat this perversion, and heal these wounds, I love her, but having her heal me and helping me fight this isn’t always as easy as it’s said. There are many times when I try to turn to her but feel like something is holding me back, I don’t what it is or why it is there.
 
Sending you a hug and sending up some prayers. We will always have our battles. God knows I struggle with a lot of internal fights, too. We just have to do the best we can and put the rest in God’s hands.
 
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Look on youtube - there are lots of videos that suggest things you can do. Fasting to combat porn/impurity is one thing that is recommended. It helps you gain control over your body.
 
There’s nothing wrong with being friends with people with the wrong views. I personally befriend everyone because I enjoy talking to people everywhere, but I don’t know if this is the case for you. From personal experience though, people really don’t like to talk politics, so it shouldn’t be an issue.
 
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