Dear friend,
Here we have a very clear example of how uncommon common sense has become in our culture. Our culture’s emphasis is clearly on “Me”—to such an extent that a woman can easily become so blinded by concern for her “fulfillment” that the needs of her children reduce to an afterthought—if that. But every child that is conceived by the uniting of egg and sperm has a RIGHT to a mother and a father—not a mother and a sperm donor.
To pull the conception of a child out of the context of the parents’ mutual love for one another is to sin against God’s design for the human race. To deny context is always a lie. A sperm bank is no match for marital love before and after conception.
God created parenthood principally for the benefit of the child. But our culture puts the cart before the horse so that parenthood becomes a matter of ego reinforcement. This inevitably occurs when we begin to put concern for what we want before concern for what God wants.
The question is not whether the Church would accept such a child into the faith. The question is whether a woman would be so selfish as to deny her child the benefit of a father. Our culture is already plagued by the absence of fathers even when they are physically around, let alone when they are not even known. Worry that the biological clock is ticking is the result of the woman’s own choice to put a career before motherhood.
Since God came first, He comes first. Rather than begin with ourselves, we must always begin with Him and make our choices accordingly. This is the only way that ultimately works……because this is reality.
Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.
