Why can't I go to confession?

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revertconvert said:
I haven’t gone yet…I’m a truck driver but I will be home this weekend and I am DEFINETLY going. I wanted to thank all of you for the advise and encouragement. Especially the examination of conscience from lilym.
Thanks so much and God Bless you all!
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RevertConvert:

You can also call and schedule a time with a priest even if a time isn’t shown on the bulletin.

It is very important that you go. The Father of Lies will tell you that you’re not ready, or that the priest will be mean or some other lie. Please don’t listen to him, and tell him to buzz off “in the name of Jesus”.

I recently had a stretch of a few months where I let him lie to me. After I while I felt worse and worse. Finally, I knew I had to go, and I asked my Pastor and reminded so that he reminded me one day after daily Mass.

As everyone here will tell you, it was soo liberating!

We’re all in your corner. And, as Jesus said, all of heaven will rejoice.

Your Brother in Christ, Michael
 
here is my favorite Examination of Conscience

catholic.org/frz/examen/examen.htm

Confession is good for the soul. It is very never racking to go but then the outcome is the best thing ever! you gain such peace in areas you sometimes didn’t know you need it!

I just remember what my decon told me during RCIA. The devil hates confession because it is you cleansing yourself and making yourself right with God.He knows that everytime you go and let go of sins that he is losing control over you. That scares him more than anything to see someone turning to God. He will do anything to keep you from going.
 
I have an opposite problem. I would like to go to confession, but our local priest has advised against it (I presume until we have covered this topic in RCIA). I am in the process of converting and wondered “why can’t I go to confession” (before officially becoming Catholic)? Has anyone else encountered this? Would it be wrong for me to go to confession anyway? (and confess for going to confession 😮 ). I have read the other posts here and find them very encouraging and helpful as I prepare for the day when I will go to my first confession (right before Easter!) * P.S. I am abiding by the priest’s request and will wait until the “proper time” to go to confession.
 
LisaG said:
I have an opposite problem. I would like to go to confession, but our local priest has advised against it (I presume until we have covered this topic in RCIA). I am in the process of converting and wondered “why can’t I go to confession” (before officially becoming Catholic)? Has anyone else encountered this? Would it be wrong for me to go to confession anyway? (and confess for going to confession 😮 ). I have read the other posts here and find them very encouraging and helpful as I prepare for the day when I will go to my first confession (right before Easter!) * P.S. I am abiding by the priest’s request and will wait until the “proper time” to go to confession.
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Lisa, each RCIA program approaches the first confession in its own way and at its own time. There were some RCIAers who posted here in December saying that they were invited to make their Confession at the Advent penance service in their parishes. Others, such as yourself, are asked to wait until right before Easter. Whatever it is, you are doing very well to obey and wait. Obedience is always blessed by God.

Welcome home!

Betsy
 
A book suggestion from a fellow convert… “Lord Have Mercy” by Scott Hahn 👍
 
kage_ar said:
A book suggestion from a fellow convert… “Lord Have Mercy” by Scott Hahn 👍
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Completely agree with you, a great book on this subject. I think it gives both newcomers and old pros a fresh perspective on this all too infrequently used sacrament.

👍
 
I myself got very nervous, and I would forget things I wanted to confess. I didn’t want to go, and rarely did. Then, I committed a mortal sin. I had to work up the courage to go, and I spent quite a while examining my conscience. I got up there, and then… I confessed just about everything I ever did. The priest looked and sounded a bit taken aback as he said that it was a very good confession. (Obviously, not taken aback at the sins themselves, just how readily I remembered so many, meaning I tried very hard.) It was the best feeling in the world. I continued to be very stressed, until I was (and still am) afflicted with scruples, (seeing sins where they do not exist, or greatly over exaggerating the severity) and I began going weekly. It has become much easier, and now my only worry is that I won’t get there in time! It’s an excellent sacrament, try to partake fairly often. 🙂
 
Jeanette_L said:
I completely understand what you are going through. I am a recent convert from an Evangelical background, and although I absolutely see the truth of the sacrament of confession, and although when I go I feel wonderfully at peace and refreshed, I still get a case of bad nerves when I know it’s time for me to go again.

And I think that partly this is because I wasn’t raised with the habit of confession, I tend to sweat it out, all the details of what I’m supposed to say and do, I get nervous.

I also know that I get really emotional when I am in confession, the tears start flowing (and that part is embarrassing to me, not really the confession of the sin, ironically), and it makes me nervous knowing this is going to happen when I am there.

But the reality is this: Christ is our confessor, the priest is standing in His stead. The key is to get past the human element and know Who you are really confessing to. This has helped me.

And walking out of that confessional is the best feeling I have ever had in my Christian experience, except for my first communion, of course! 😃
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I have not yet officially converted to Catholicism from my Evangelical background, so of course I have not done/had/participated in my first confession. I have, however, prayed before the Blessed Sacrament and if the feeling of peace from a confession to a priest is anything like that experience, then I imagine that confession will become an event I look forward to… yes?
 
Another good way to prepare for confession is to listen to Father Larry Richards’ “Confession” CD. When you’re done listening, you can’t help but want to go! I heard him give a similar presentation during a Lenten mission, and when he had finished speaking and confessions were being heard, the lines were so long they wrapped around the church. Truly inspiring - give it a listen!
 
I also don’t think this problem is limited converts. I’m a cradle Catholic and I am terrified of confession. Intellectually, I know that I have nothing to fear and that the priest has heard everything I have to confess and more. I usually end up going every 2-3 years when I get up the courage. I went the first time last night in 18 months and like I said 18 months ago, I need to do this more often. Hopefully, I will be able to follow through on it. I really believe that Mother Mary helped me with the courage to go, because I really started to feel the “need” to go after I re-built my Rosary last week.
 
Nechasin said:
I also don’t think this problem is limited converts. I’m a cradle Catholic and I am terrified of confession. Intellectually, I know that I have nothing to fear and that the priest has heard everything I have to confess and more. I usually end up going every 2-3 years when I get up the courage. I went the first time last night in 18 months and like I said 18 months ago, I need to do this more often. Hopefully, I will be able to follow through on it. I really believe that Mother Mary helped me with the courage to go, because I really started to feel the “need” to go after I re-built my Rosary last week.
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I am not even a Catholic (officially) yet, but I was under the impression that confession was required/expected before taking the Holy Eucharist along with a 3hr or is it 1hr fast… am I correct?:rolleyes:
 
toothdigger said:
I am not even a Catholic (officially) yet, but I was under the impression that confession was required/expected before taking the Holy Eucharist along with a 3hr or is it 1hr fast… am I correct?:rolleyes:
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The requirement is that you be free from mortal sin. And thus you can start a whole new thread on what defines a mortal sin, or go to the many that have already been started.
 
Lots of good advise here and I hope you find your way to the confessional.
There is NOTHING like the feeling afterwards.
I was born into the faith, when I turned 18 I rarely went to church. I still held on to many of the teachings subconsiously, but definatly not active.
Then Our Lord spoke to me, after 21 years I felt the need to go back to Church and embace/rediscover my faith.
I was a nervous wreck when I made my way to the confessional. The priest was elated that after all that time, I came back. Afterwards, I dont think I walked out of the Church, think I floated 😃
I am currently courting a new convert. I remember just after we met her story regarding confession. She was so nervous and wanted so bad to do everything right, whe wrote everything down on a piece of paper. When she got inside the confessional it was so dark she couldnt read it 🙂
Then she had a “problem” where she was scared to go to a different priest. After some gentle encouraging and support, she went to a different Priest. I wont forget her words afterwards, “you are right, it doesn’t matter which Priest hears my confession, all that matters is that I go”.
Now she is like an “old hand” at it 🙂 different priest, different parish, no worries.

Find the time, you definatly will be glad you did. After all, you have the time to go to Mass every Sunday, a little more time is not too much to ask.
 
KGM06 said:
Find the time, you definatly will be glad you did. After all, you have the time to go to Mass every Sunday, a little more time is not too much to ask.
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Actually, you may not even need that much extra time. Most parishes have confession on Saturday afternoons. My parish has confession from 2:30-3:30 p.m. Then we have 4:00 p.m. Sunday Vigil Mass. So I can easily go to confession and then to Mass right afterwards without even making two separate trips to the church.
 
Nechasin said:
I also don’t think this problem is limited converts. I’m a cradle Catholic and I am terrified of confession. Intellectually, I know that I have nothing to fear and that the priest has heard everything I have to confess and more. I usually end up going every 2-3 years when I get up the courage. I went the first time last night in 18 months and like I said 18 months ago, I need to do this more often. Hopefully, I will be able to follow through on it. I really believe that Mother Mary helped me with the courage to go, because I really started to feel the “need” to go after I re-built my Rosary last week.
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I’m the same - not with Confession but with other things in my life that scare the heck out of me. Have you ever prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet? That’s a nice one to get you thinking about confession as Christ’s offer of mercy rather than judgement. I always say it just before I go to Confession.
 
LilyM said:
I’m the same - not with Confession but with other things in my life that scare the heck out of me. Have you ever prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet? That’s a nice one to get you thinking about confession as Christ’s offer of mercy rather than judgement. I always say it just before I go to Confession.
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I used to say it while I was in college. I have already decided that on of the things that I’m going to do for Lent is pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet every day.
 
LisaG said:
I have an opposite problem. I would like to go to confession, but our local priest has advised against it (I presume until we have covered this topic in RCIA). I am in the process of converting and wondered “why can’t I go to confession” (before officially becoming Catholic)? Has anyone else encountered this? Would it be wrong for me to go to confession anyway? (and confess for going to confession 😮 ). I have read the other posts here and find them very encouraging and helpful as I prepare for the day when I will go to my first confession (right before Easter!) * P.S. I am abiding by the priest’s request and will wait until the “proper time” to go to confession.
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Confession is for members. Sometimes priests may not make this clear if a non-Catholic in emotional distress presents themselves at the confessional, for understandable pastoral reasons.

There are lots of reasons why this should be so. To give non-Catholics absolution in confession would risk creating the impression that full membership was an optional extra - a bit bit like membership of the Co-Operative society versus merely being a customer.
 
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