Why can't my husband confess in private prayer?

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Shae

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I have been begging my husband to go to his first confession, since his baptism in 2001. Pride and embarassment is getting in the way. He says that if he can talk to God in personal prayer, and he is right there listening. Why can’t he confess his sins in the same way? Actually I am interested in the answer myself, why do we have to go through an earthly human, if we can reach God in our prayers?

Yours in Christ

Shae
 
Confession is the way Christ asks us to do this. “Whose sins you forgive, they are forgiven . . .” This presumes a confession.

As a Convert, I think this sacrament is one of the best things the Catholic Church has going for it. Especially when you have really difficult things to confess, and you do it, there is a palpable sense that Jesus has made that confession for you. Just DO it! In Malachi Martin’s old book, Hostage to the Devil, a demon tempts a holy young priest: "You lily white cur! There will come a time when you are fed up with your vows, when you find a woman and grab a quickie in the back seat of the car – *and you will be afraid to confess it! *

Fear of confession is one of the devil’s best tricks. Right after making people believe he doesn’t exist.

Ask Jesus to do it for you.
 
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Shae:
I have been begging my husband to go to his first confession, since his baptism in 2001. Pride and embarassment is getting in the way. He says that if he can talk to God in personal prayer, and he is right there listening. Why can’t he confess his sins in the same way? Actually I am interested in the answer myself, why do we have to go through an earthly human, if we can reach God in our prayers?

Yours in Christ

Shae
Shae,

The answer, aside from the one already given: that this is how Christ set up the process, is actually very simple.

Consider the description of the Body of Christ that St. Paul gives us. We are all part of that Body, and when part of the body is sick, the whole body is sick. This applies to sin as well. St. Paul tells us:
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take Christ’s members and make them the members of a prostitute? Of course not! (1 Cor 6:15)
This tells us that when one member sins, it affects all of us.

The priest represents God and he represents the community. He grants forgivess from God, but he also grants forgiveness from the Body of Christ which has been injured due to the sins of the members of the Body of Christ. We need to have both or we, effectively have neither.

Deacon Ed
 
In addition, try finding a parish with an old fashioned confessional. I’ve always found those easiest when I was embarrassed about going to Confession. Sometimes it’s just easier when you’re not face-to-face…
 
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Shae:
He says that if he can talk to God in personal prayer, and he is right there listening. Why can’t he confess his sins in the same way?
Your husbnd is right. he can talk to God in personal prayer. God is right there listening. And he cant also confess his sins in private prayer (good habit actually). The forgiveness of those sins though (with extreme exceptions) is not forgiven in private prayer.

Can God forgive sins this way? Of course, no one would doubt that, but is this the way He chose. No, it is not.

Jesus (God the Second Person of the Trinity) freely chose the way in which he would forgive sins, giving the penitent assurance of absolution and forgiveness by the words of the priest.

Jesus asks us to confess in this way, to a priest. We cannot presume that he will forgive us when we want the way we want.
 
I’m a convert myself. Not long ago, I was in a mixed bible study, and the subject of confession came up. All I could give was my experience of it.

All the years I was a protestant, I tried it their way. Pray straight to God and ask forgiveness. But I never FELT forgiven. In the confessional, I can actually here the words that my sins are forgiven. I can KNOW that my sins are fogiven.

God knows that we have a psychological need to actually hear that. We need to know that the sins that we have confessed have been heard and responded to. I know that it has been a great help to me. Now there is no doubt in my mind that my confessed sins are forgiven.
 
Do you realize that you are asking mere human beings why God Almighty established the Sacrament of Penance because you have a hard time understanding why God would work through human beings to forgive sins? We cannot answer the question as to why God did what He did any more than the priest can forgive your sins without authority from God to do so!

It all boils down to obedience!
 
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