Why courtship?

[Larowyn]

Candles and flashlights are both meant to provide light. That doesn’t make them the same thing.

Well, here you go Wordsworth: the definitions for dating and courtship. Since you totally know everything about everything anyway you probably knew this already.

Courtship

1. the wooing of one person by another.
2. the period during which such wooing takes place.
3. solicitation of favors, applause, etc.
4. Ethology. behavior in animals that occurs before and during mating, often including elaborate displays.
5. Obsolete. courtly behavior; courtesy; gallantry.

Dating

1. a social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person

If you think that I am somehow inviting Satan into my relationships because of how I use the word “date,” then cry me a river.

 

[NTOT]

I’m not personally interested in dating or courting (discerning a vocation here), but I’m very curious as to the reasons why dating is frowned upon by most orthodox Catholics. If I told any one of my Catholic friends that dating is bad, they’d think I was joking (though it wouldn’t be the first thing I said that got such a response ).

So two questions, really. What distinguishes courting from dating, and why is courting the better, more Catholic option?

Courtship is actually very popular in protestant circles where children, especially girls don’t leave the roost until the parents find them a suitable partner. It is rather impractical for people old enough to be living on their own and making their own way in life.

 

[Belgarion]

I use the terms “Date” and “Court” interchangeably somtimes.

But its only because my knowledge of the differences was limited at first. I still use the terms that way, but only because people know what I mean.

 

[buckr02]

Well, here you go Wordsworth: the definitions for dating and courtship. Since you totally know everything about everything anyway you probably knew this already.

Calm down, dude. Don’t get all uptight because I provided a good counterargument.

Courtship

1. the wooing of one person by another.
2. the period during which such wooing takes place.
3. solicitation of favors, applause, etc.
4. Ethology. behavior in animals that occurs before and during mating, often including elaborate displays.
5. Obsolete. courtly behavior; courtesy; gallantry.

Dating

1. a social appointment, engagement, or occasion arranged beforehand with another person

Even by these definitions, dating and courtship are not the same thing.
Courtship = one seeking another for mating / marriage / etc.
Dating = meeting up together

The definition you provided of dating has no mention of seeking to mate / marry / etc.

If you think that I am somehow inviting Satan into my relationships because of how I use the word “date,” then cry me a river.

When did I or anyone else say that dating is evil? They are just different. Them being different does not make one better or one worse. They are a matter of preference.

Now getting away from your dictionary.com analysis, it is clear by the OP’s intent that he is talking about the old style of courtship done in decades past, which has seen a bit of a revival lately. This courtship involves spending time with family and getting to know each other without the one-on-one dates as opposed to going out alone. They are different.

It sounds like you’re the one arguing semantics here.

 

[Larowyn]

Calm down, dude. Don’t get all uptight because I provided a good counterargument.

That wasn’t a very good riposte, champ.

Even by these definitions, dating and courtship are not the same thing.
Courtship = one seeking another for mating / marriage / etc.
Dating = meeting up together

The definition you provided of dating has no mention of seeking to mate / marry / etc.

Neither did the definitions for courtship.

When did I or anyone else say that dating is evil? They are just different. Them being different does not make one better or one worse. They are a matter of preference.

Now getting away from your dictionary.com analysis, it is clear by the OP’s intent that he is talking about the old style of courtship done in decades past, which has seen a bit of a revival lately. This courtship involves spending time with family and getting to know each other without the one-on-one dates as opposed to going out alone. They are different.

It sounds like you’re the one arguing semantics here.

I’m not arguing semantics, I’m just tired of people who think I’m going to do something sinful because of how I use the word “date.” “Courtship is romance God’s way” my eye. How many dates did he go on anyway?

 

[buckr02]

That wasn’t a very good riposte, champ.

I’m not really sure what you mean by this. My counterargument was good if that’s what you mean. And if you mean that my comeback was bad, it wasn’t a comeback.

Neither did the definitions for courtship.

Yes they did. The first two say:

1. the wooing of one person by another.
2. the period during which such wooing takes place.

So then what does it mean to “woo” someone?

1. to seek the favor, affection, or love of, esp. with a view to marriage.
2. to make love to a woman; court: He went wooing.

So the first two definitions of “courtship” do entail mating / marrying / etc.

The fourth definition has the word mate right in it:

1. Ethology. behavior in animals that occurs before and during mating, often including elaborate displays.

So yes, they do.

I’m not arguing semantics, I’m just tired of people who think I’m going to do something sinful because of how I use the word “date.” “Courtship is romance God’s way” my eye. How many dates did he go on anyway?

I agree, there’s no basis to say that dating is “romance man’s way.” That’s dumb, I think either one could be very successful if the persons involved are mature enough. I think courtship only really makes sense if you are of high school age and perhaps college. I plan on “dating” when the time comes.

 

[buckr02]

Oh and I apologize, Larowyn, if I ever come off as condescending. I know I can often be and I am trying fix that, so don’t think I am ever trying to make you sound dumb.

 

[Belgarion]

While there’s nothing wrong with dating, it does carry with it more risks than Courtship. Occasions of sin show up more often in dating than courting.
So it is accurate to say that God would want us to be prudent and avoid occasions of sin. Courtship would be preferable to Him, don’t you think?

 

[Larowyn]

On one forum I’m arguing for abstinence all alone against like five people, on another I’m arguing the difference between courtship and dating with an encyclopedia.

 

[Belgarion]

On one forum I’m arguing for abstinence all alone against like five people, on another I’m arguing the difference between courtship and dating with an encyclopedia.

Your point?

Considering that you called your opposition and encylopedia, why bother arguing? The encyclopedia is usually right, so now you’re just arguing over definitions against a group of people that understands the differences between courtship and dating.

You can think they are the same, but it won’t actually make them the same.

They CAN be two methods that are heading for the same goal. But that facts are that they are two DIFFERENT methods.

End of story.

If you don’t want to argue about it, then don’t.

 

[buckr02]

Your point?

Considering that you called your opposition and encylopedia, why bother arguing? The encyclopedia is usually right, so now you’re just arguing over definitions against a group of people that understands the differences between courtship and dating.

You can think they are the same, but it won’t actually make them the same.

They CAN be two methods that are heading for the same goal. But that facts are that they are two DIFFERENT methods.

End of story.

If you don’t want to argue about it, then don’t.

I think he was just making a joke. I thought it was funny, unless I got some meaning out of it that was unintended.

 

[Belgarion]

I think he was just making a joke. I thought it was funny, unless I got some meaning out of it that was unintended.

I have no sense of humor when it comes to issues I deem “Serious”

…Or maybe I’m just not paying enough attention.

 

[Larowyn]

I think he was just making a joke. I thought it was funny, unless I got some meaning out of it that was unintended.

I don’t pay too much attention to Belgarion since he’s usually here just to be a troll.

 

[Belgarion]

I don’t pay too much attention to Belgarion since he’s usually here just to be a troll.

You are insane.
I am not a troll.
I am an active member on this forum.

Look up the definition

I may go off topic occasionally, but you are sadly mistaken if you consider me a troll.

 

[Larowyn]

You are insane.
I am not a troll.
I am an active member on this forum.

Look up the definition

I may go off topic occasionally, but you are sadly mistaken if you consider me a troll.

Even trolls can be active members.

 

[Belgarion]

Even trolls can be active members.

As you have so wonderfully proven.
You’ve taken this conversation from “Why courtship” (a question asking why coutship is better, what the differences are etc) to “There is no difference/Yes there is!” (with you provoking an emotional response in some by claiming to know everything when you don’t) and now to accusing an active member of the forum (who does not cause disruption) of being a forum troll.

You’ve certainly proven that you are indeed a troll.

Now, stop arguing over baseless accusations and refer to the original post if you have lost your way in this topic.

 

[Larowyn]

As you have so wonderfully proven.
You’ve taken this conversation from “Why courtship” (a question asking why coutship is better, what the differences are etc) to “There is no difference/Yes there is!” (with you provoking an emotional response in some by claiming to know everything when you don’t) and now to accusing an active member of the forum (who does not cause disruption) of being a forum troll.

You’ve certainly proven that you are indeed a troll.

Now, stop arguing over baseless accusations and refer to the original post if you have lost your way in this topic.

Your sniping is derailing this topic. I just said that courtship and dating were basically the same thing, and, as typical of CAF members, everyone decided to pick on poor Larowyn again.

 

[Belgarion]

Your sniping is derailing this topic. I just said that courtship and dating were basically the same thing, and, as typical of CAF members, everyone decided to pick on poor Larowyn again.

Cry me a river.
You were wrong, people corrected you. No one is picking on you.
We would have done the same thing to ANYONE who was so obviously incorrect.

 

[buckr02]

Alright guys, who is going to be like Jesus, be the bigger man, and end this pointless name-calling session?

 

[Belgarion]

Alright guys, who is going to be like Jesus, be the bigger man, and end this pointless name-calling session?

Name calling?

Was I name calling? I realized that he was a troll after I read the definition. That’s pretty much it.

Eh, I tried to end the conversation, but no matter how conclusive a point is, he just keeps coming back.