Why do I let myself miss Mass?

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slyboots

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I will start with an explanation of why I ask this.
I am a thinking feeling believing Catholic grandmother. My faith is intact. I have no doubts about the Church being the True Church and Christ’s path to salvation. I am a praying woman. I am a Godmother to four beautiful children and a grandmother to three more. I am not angry with the Church for it’s poor handling of the pedeophilia situation. I think men, not women should be priests. I love Pope Benedict. I like my parish. I know Christ is there in the Eucharist.
Why then, on Sunday morning or Saturday evening can I not get myself to Mass?
I have gone to confession over this a number of times and firmly mean to amend this behavior. But I am not doing it. Why do I let myself go without the comfort and strengthening gift of the Mass?
 
slyboots,
if you consider that at Mass, you are receiving your God and Savior, Jesus Christ,… how could you pass it up?

Jim
 
I think you probably know the reason better than anyone of us. I don’t think I know the reason…but here could be only a few of them:
  • being tired.
  • thinking that death is still a thousand year from now for you.
  • does not think much about Hell and the consequences of dying not in state of grace?
  • not knowing/seeing other elderly who live in the Nursing Home wanting to receive the Holy Eucharist.
  • not knowing how powerful of a Mass is.
I am just guessing here.
I hope you could go to mass today.

God bless.
 
slyboots said:
Exactly my point. Why on earth do I let that happen?
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Can you narrow down the problem?

Do you miss Mass because you oversleep? Is it a transportation issue?

How many different Mass times are there in your town? Do you have a preference?

What is your thought process on weekends? Are you so busy that you don’t think about it until it’s too late, or do you just feel unmotivated?
 
I did a quick search of some of your earlier posts and noticed two things.

First, you converted to Catholicism rather late in life (42). I wonder if the habit of attending weekly church service is just something that is not part of your “hard wiring.”

Second, you were really pretty sick a few months ago. Maybe you still just aren’t up to a regular routine.

Just thoughts.

While I can’t imagine not going to Mass every Sunday (and, last week, when I did miss it because of being sick, I really, truly, did “miss” it), I can see how, if I skipped a month or so, even for good reasons, maybe I would find myself out of the habit and just not going. Evil tempts us that way . . .
 
I am well. I have transportation. I have been a Sunday church attendee all my life. Church of Christ as a child, Disciples as a teenager, an Episcopalian for 20 years and then 14 years ago I finally found my home in the Catholic Church.
I think I am slothful. Laziness. But why?
I know my salvation depends on Christ. I fear hell which frankly given my age I really should be concerned with. I love the Mass once I am there. Then why do I choose to absent myself?
I need to pray on this more. Pray for me please.
 
slyboots said:
Then why do I choose to absent myself?
I need to pray on this more. Pray for me please.
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Maybe you need a friend or someone you know well go together for few times. Or you could find something that you could help the parish before or after Sunday mass.

You are in my prayer.
 
A good issue to mention in Confession or by an appointment with your parish priest.
Pray for me please.
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Will be keeping you in prayer.
I experience a similar situation to you in some ways with prayer. I experience great reluctance and tardiness re going to my Prayer Times, and yet once I am there - it is a joy! I can’t understand why I experience the lack of desire outside of prayer times that I do…and so I know I must simply force myself to go to prayer thought I do not feel like it at all. It is a complete mystery to me that I cannot understand why I can never recall the joy of prayer in such a way as to motivate me, until I am actually at prayer. I know outside of actual prayer that I shall be happy to be there, but not in a way that motivates me - I cannot actually grasp in memory the memory of the joy.

I think if you are choosing not to go to Mass and in the absence of any sort of psychological pathology, then it is quite simply a matter of choosing to go to Mass and going…and you can leave reasons you have chosen in the past not to go as something of a mystery. Very often we cannot understand our own behaviour and feelings. If love of The Mass and The Blessed Eucharist will not get us to Mass, then completing our duty should.

Blessings…Barb:)
 
slyboots said:
I am well. I have transportation. I have been a Sunday church attendee all my life. Church of Christ as a child, Disciples as a teenager, an Episcopalian for 20 years and then 14 years ago I finally found my home in the Catholic Church.
I think I am slothful. Laziness. But why?
I know my salvation depends on Christ. I fear hell which frankly given my age I really should be concerned with. I love the Mass once I am there. Then why do I choose to absent myself?
I need to pray on this more. Pray for me please.
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What happens on the weekend? Do you think, “Oh, I really should go to Mass,” and then just not do it? Or do you not think about it at all?

Regardless, I think a solution would be to make yourself accountable to someone. Do you have friends or relatives to carpool with? If you know someone is taking the time to pick you up, or if you have an obligation to pick someone up, you’re more likely to go.

Perhaps you could volunteer to be a lector or an EMHC so you’re actively helping with the Mass as well as participating – if you know someone is counting on you to be there, you’re more likely to go.

Are there elderly in your parish who need rides to Mass? If so, that’s a way you can both serve your parish and help yourself. If you know that you are responsible for getting someone else to Mass, it will motivate you further.

Good luck – I will include you in my prayers.
 
Could you try going to daily Mass for a few weeks? I’m a new Catholic and when I first started going to Mass it sometimes seemed difficult to make myself go (but I did go). I just wasn’t used to going to a church service on Sunday (or Saturday eve). Then I started going to daily Mass and it so keeps me in the groove that I’ve never had a problem going to weekend Mass. In fact I now love all of the Masses I go to and the daily Masses seem to lead me right into the weekend Mass. Its hard to explain how big of a difference it makes. Its like it keeps me on an even keel spiritually throughout the week so that there is not that big lurch on the weekend.

Good luck!
 
This was quoted from the Didaskalia, a 3rd century Syrian Christian document in our bulletin yesterday.

Let the people not fail to attend, but let them gather together. Let no one deprive the church by staying away; by so doing they deprive the Body of Christ of one of its members. Do not, then make light of your own selves. Do not deprive the Body of Christ of His members; do not rend, do not scatter His Body.

Does this encourage and motivate you?
 
bpbasilphx said:
This was quoted from the Didaskalia, a 3rd century Syrian Christian document in our bulletin yesterday.

Let the people not fail to attend, but let them gather together. Let no one deprive the church by staying away; by so doing they deprive the Body of Christ of one of its members. Do not, then make light of your own selves. Do not deprive the Body of Christ of His members; do not rend, do not scatter His Body.

Does this encourage and motivate you?
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Yes it does.
Thank you all for your suggestions. I am considering some of them now.
 
Slyboots,

I, too, am a convert from Protestantism (actuall I am a revert). As a Protestant, I very slack in going to church every Sunday, but as a Catholic now, I have been able to go every Sunday.

I think the difference for me was on the view of salvation. Protestants saw salvation was soley by faith. So missing a church really did not effect my salvation. It is not that Protestants did not encourage attending church, and did not see as important for one to grow closer to Christ. But they did not see that not going to Church would send a person to Hell.

But this is not the teaching of the Catholic Church, although there are many Catholics who seem to view church attendance the way Protestants view it. The Catholic Church still teaches that a deliberate, knowing refusal to honor the Sunday Sabaath by going to church is a mortal sin. It matters not what else you or do notb do, this is still a mortal sin that can anyone to Hell.

This may not be the best motivation for going to church - fear of going to Hell. The Church prefers that we have better motives for doing right and not doing wrong - such as the motive the we love God. But if the only thing we can muster is fear, the Church teaches that this is still acceptable to God.

Most of the time I love going to Church. I cannot wait to habe communion with Him. But there are a few times where I just do not feel like going to church. But I still go. I go because it is required of me to go. Refusal to go would endanger my eternal soul to Hell. Sure, I can always go to confession. But what if I die before I have a chance to that? Is it worth to take that risk.

It amazing how discplined we are when we realize that it is required. There are far more times that I do not feel like going to work. But still I go. Why? Simply because I know that going to work is not optional. My boss does not just suggest that I go to work. He requires it. If I do not go work, I’ll get fired. So I do not have a problem with missing work, I know if I miss work I will get fired. Missing work is not an option. My Dad, when he was alive, had to take some serious heart medicine 6 times a day. He had no problem of sometimes missing his medication, because he knew that he missed his medication, he would die. So missing it was not an option.

I think if we viewed attending Sunday Mass as being absolutely mandatory (which is what the Church says it is), and that missing it would endanger our souls, then we would not it see missing this Mass as an option. We would just do it, not matter how we feel.
 
Well, the road to Hell is paved…
I intended firmly to go to Mass Sunday. I came down with a raging sinus infection and felt terrible. So once again I did not go.
I know if I am sick that I should stay away from other people and rest and get well.
Thank God. There is hopefully next Sunday to start again.
 
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