Why do I never stick to it?

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ClairUK

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Hello everyone,
Some of you may remember me from around the New Year, when I had moved to a new village and the priest here ran individual preparations rather than RCIA classes…but he said I must get into the pattern of attending church every Sunday first…
I have to confess that I only went to the church one time…very soon after that I got a full time job which included working weekends and I never kept up with the church. To be totally honest I didn’t think about it as much, as if my ‘conviction’ about becoming a Catholic had fallen by the wayside…I don’t really know what happened.
But this is a familiar pattern with me - I want to become a Catholic and it consumes my every thought, I pray all the time, read up about it as much as I can…but then my enthusiasm seems to fall away and I don’t persue it.
I don’t know if I overthink things and the things that don’t fit with my ‘logic’ get in the way, or what happens, but I wish I could break this cycle.
Also, although I loved the church I went to, it was all very overwhelming and complicated and only one person spoke to me (not the priest), and being a very shy person until I get to know people, I found this intimidating and I’m sure it’s a contributing factor as to why I didn’t go back.
Can anyone help me to stick to the path my heart wants me to be on?:confused:
Thanks in advance 🙂
 
ClairUK said:
Hello everyone,
Some of you may remember me from around the New Year, when I had moved to a new village and the priest here ran individual preparations rather than RCIA classes…but he said I must get into the pattern of attending church every Sunday first…
I have to confess that I only went to the church one time…very soon after that I got a full time job which included working weekends and I never kept up with the church. To be totally honest I didn’t think about it as much, as if my ‘conviction’ about becoming a Catholic had fallen by the wayside…I don’t really know what happened.
But this is a familiar pattern with me - I want to become a Catholic and it consumes my every thought, I pray all the time, read up about it as much as I can…but then my enthusiasm seems to fall away and I don’t persue it.
I don’t know if I overthink things and the things that don’t fit with my ‘logic’ get in the way, or what happens, but I wish I could break this cycle.
Also, although I loved the church I went to, it was all very overwhelming and complicated and only one person spoke to me (not the priest), and being a very shy person until I get to know people, I found this intimidating and I’m sure it’s a contributing factor as to why I didn’t go back.
Can anyone help me to stick to the path my heart wants me to be on?:confused:
Thanks in advance 🙂
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Jesus can help you! Ask for Sundays off. It all comes down to how much you want to be Catholic.

The first time I entered a Catholic Church my will was against it. I was worn out spiritually from failed hopes elsewhere and was pretty cold toward religion in general. The reason I went was because I believed Catholicism was/is the original Church, and they had the Pope. The second Sunday one of my friends who was a parishoner introduced me to the priest and he told me to start coming Sundays. After that I think he forgot(having other responsibilities) and I just contacted him about 2 weeks ago. RCIA starts soon. It’s a committment and work, but its worth it. Again, one must persevere in their intention. God be with you!🙂
 
Wow, it’s strange to hear that RCIA will be starting up again soon. I just went through it this year. But I guess it does take up most of the year. It’s a really wonderful time. If you can’t get the whole day off work, ask at least to have the morning off so you can go to Church. Or, perhaps it would be easier for you to go to the Saturday Vigil. If you have any other set days off, I think you can talk to your priest about making that your Sunday Mass. I’m not sure of this, but speak your priest about your situation.

Mass is confusing at first, but the more you go, the more you will learn. I’m a very shy person as well, but involving myself with the church really helped. Also near the end of mass was always hard for me when it was time to give peace to others. After a while, I adjusted and got used to it, now I don’t feel weird about it.

I hope RCIA goes well for you! Keep praying and you will be a Catholic soon enough!
 
Thanks for the replies - work isn’t actually part of the problem now as I recently lost my job… .it’s just my confidence and the fact that my ‘will’ to become Catholic seems to ‘wax and wane’…and even my faith in God wavers…I find it difficult to pray sometimes as I feel like a hypocrite…
 
all of us need encouragment from time to time, don’t be discouraged. It certainly doesnt make u a hypocrite, just human…
 
Thanks John…I think that’s part of my problem - I have nbody to encourage me, no Catholic family or friends here…none are even Christian…
 
ClairUK said:
Hello everyone,
Some of you may remember me from around the New Year, when I had moved to a new village and the priest here ran individual preparations rather than RCIA classes…but he said I must get into the pattern of attending church every Sunday first…
I have to confess that I only went to the church one time…very soon after that I got a full time job which included working weekends and I never kept up with the church. To be totally honest I didn’t think about it as much, as if my ‘conviction’ about becoming a Catholic had fallen by the wayside…I don’t really know what happened.
But this is a familiar pattern with me - I want to become a Catholic and it consumes my every thought, I pray all the time, read up about it as much as I can…but then my enthusiasm seems to fall away and I don’t persue it.
I don’t know if I overthink things and the things that don’t fit with my ‘logic’ get in the way, or what happens, but I wish I could break this cycle.
Also, although I loved the church I went to, it was all very overwhelming and complicated and only one person spoke to me (not the priest), and being a very shy person until I get to know people, I found this intimidating and I’m sure it’s a contributing factor as to why I didn’t go back.
Can anyone help me to stick to the path my heart wants me to be on?:confused:
Thanks in advance 🙂
Click to expand...
Just pick a time that you can make it to mass (Saturday evening or one of the Sunday masses) and make that your mass. Go, sit in the back, and listen to the prayers that the priest says, listen to the three readings, and sing the songs. You can buy a Sunday missal that has the readings for each Sunday mass in it and it also has the ‘order of the mass’ in it and the responses for the people to say. You don’t have to initially talk to anyone if your too shy, the more you attend the same mass the more you will recognize the same people and they will recognize you and you will start feeling more comfortable.👍
 
Once you are comfortable in attending mass, then contact your priest or the religious ed. office and start attending RCIA. Good luck and I’ll pray that you find your way!!!
 
ClairUK said:
Hello everyone,
Some of you may remember me from around the New Year, when I had moved to a new village and the priest here ran individual preparations rather than RCIA classes…but he said I must get into the pattern of attending church every Sunday first…
I have to confess that I only went to the church one time…very soon after that I got a full time job which included working weekends and I never kept up with the church. To be totally honest I didn’t think about it as much, as if my ‘conviction’ about becoming a Catholic had fallen by the wayside…I don’t really know what happened.
But this is a familiar pattern with me - I want to become a Catholic and it consumes my every thought, I pray all the time, read up about it as much as I can…but then my enthusiasm seems to fall away and I don’t persue it.
I don’t know if I overthink things and the things that don’t fit with my ‘logic’ get in the way, or what happens, but I wish I could break this cycle.
Also, although I loved the church I went to, it was all very overwhelming and complicated and only one person spoke to me (not the priest), and being a very shy person until I get to know people, I found this intimidating and I’m sure it’s a contributing factor as to why I didn’t go back.
Can anyone help me to stick to the path my heart wants me to be on?:confused:
Thanks in advance 🙂
Click to expand...
I’ve been trapped in that pattern for nearly sixteen years now. That’s not much help to you, but you are not the only one with this history.
 
Wow Contarini, that’s an awfully long time 😦 I started looking into Christianity about 7 or 8 years ago…did an Alpha course (twice), went to an AoG church for a while, and then decided on the CC…I know I should get on and just do it…:o

That’s good advice CalCatholic, and thankyou for the prayers, I shall make a determined effort to go this Sunday, to the one in my village…last time I went to the one in the next town (same priest at both churches) which was bigger - the little one might not be so intimidating…
I shall also start praying properly…I’m sure that’s part of the problem as well!

Many thanks for all of the replies, I appreciate the (name removed by moderator)ut:tiphat:
 
Hello ClairUK,

Perhaps you could also attend weekday Mass? I’m a convert, and the first few times that I attended Mass was during weekday mornings. Small, reverent groups in a more intimate setting. Small groups are often friendly and welcoming. In my case, they were very helpful and seemed genuinely happy (maybe even excited) that I was considering joining the Church.

I would also suggest that you conitnue to visit Catholic Answers Forums. This is a great group that will be more than willing to support you along the way. A wealth of information is at your finger tips here in the forums and on the Catholic Answers site.

Pray, read, pray, read…

I’ll say a prayer for you Clair! God bless!
 
Thankyou very much, it’s a very good site…just a job to know where to start!
Unfortunately there is no daily mass in this parish…only Sundays and Holy Days (there isn’t even a Saturday evening Mass)😦
 
ClairUK said:
Thankyou very much, it’s a very good site…just a job to know where to start!
Unfortunately there is no daily mass in this parish…only Sundays and Holy Days (there isn’t even a Saturday evening Mass)😦
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Well make Sunday (The Lord’s Day) your day to worship God, and pick the same mass time and slowly become a part of you parish community! 👍
 
Early start for myself and my 4 year old this Sunday then 😉 and every Sunday!
 
Hi, Clair.
I notice you are in Gloucestershire. Obviously, I don’t know whereabouts in Gloucestershire you are, but I am a Benedictine Oblate of Prinknash Abbey in Gloucestershire, where Mass is said every day, as well as the hours of the Divine Office. The chapel is very small and quiet, and if you were to contact the monastery and tell the Brothers your anxieties and seek advice, you would receive much encouragement, and would get to know both the monks and the other members of the local congregation who attend Mass there each day.

You can find the monastery here: prinknashabbey.org/

Be assured of my prayers.

Peace be with you.🙂
 
Llanbedr said:
The chapel is very small and quiet, and if you were to contact the monastery and tell the Brothers your anxieties and seek advice, you would receive much encouragement, and would get to know both the monks and the other members of the local congregation who attend Mass there each day.
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Sounds like a great opportunity, Clair. Seems as though God has provided you with a wonderful resource. Go !!! 🙂
 
Llanbedr said:
Hi, Clair.
I notice you are in Gloucestershire. Obviously, I don’t know whereabouts in Gloucestershire you are, but I am a Benedictine Oblate of Prinknash Abbey in Gloucestershire, where Mass is said every day, as well as the hours of the Divine Office. The chapel is very small and quiet, and if you were to contact the monastery and tell the Brothers your anxieties and seek advice, you would receive much encouragement, and would get to know both the monks and the other members of the local congregation who attend Mass there each day.

You can find the monastery here: prinknashabbey.org/

Be assured of my prayers.

Peace be with you.🙂
Click to expand...
Hi Llanbedr,
I have been to Prinknash a couple of times (when I lived just outside Gloucester), but not since the move back to St Peter’s Grange. I now live in the North Cotswolds, so more of a trek, but certainly worth it in this case if they can help me! Thankyou so much for the suggestion.
Incidentally, last time I was there I bought the Benedictine Handbook, which had a small section on Oblates, prior to that I’d never heard the term 🙂
Thankyou for your prayers, God Bless you 🙂
 
Pray a lot more about…tell God…“I desire to Mass more frequently…I want to desire to go to Mass more frequently…help me desire to go to Mass more frequently. I think it will help me love more…etc.”

Have the Father-son talk.

The excuses and obstacles will soon fade away. But then you’re going to need to step with a strong foot forward.
 
Update:

I attended Mass in my own village today. I sat 3 rows back because when I got there, there were only 3 other people there - but then about 20 more turned up and I felt very nervous as they all sat behind me and I felt they would all be watching me! They weren’t, of course…but I get silly nerves like that…
I just about managed to follow it, stood, knelt and sat when I was meant to, mumbled my way through the hymns, and sort of managed to keep up with the Homilies etc…
It was much better than the first time I went. After Mass was over I remembered to genuflect (never done that before - was I supposed to make the sign of the cross as well?)), and then went and spoke to 3 people without waiting for them to approach me first:o I’m so silly that way usually!
They were very friendly, told me not to worry, and that it was a friendly little group and they were glad to see more people, especially younger ones (although I’m not that young, I’m 37). They said they hoped to see me next week. I then asked if I was allowed to use the Holy water to make the sign of the cross on the way out and they said of course I could, so I did that…was very happy to be able to do that since I can’t take Holy Communion…
I then managed to briefly speak to the priest before he rushed off to Mass at the other church, and he told me to phone him and we could arrange a one-to-one meeting…I’m so excited about that!
All in all, a great success…thanks to all on this forum for the encouragement (even other threads have helped me), I really appreciate it!
God Bless 🙂
 
ClairUK said:
Update:

I attended Mass in my own village today. I sat 3 rows back because when I got there, there were only 3 other people there - but then about 20 more turned up and I felt very nervous as they all sat behind me and I felt they would all be watching me! They weren’t, of course…but I get silly nerves like that…
I just about managed to follow it, stood, knelt and sat when I was meant to, mumbled my way through the hymns, and sort of managed to keep up with the Homilies etc…
It was much better than the first time I went. After Mass was over I remembered to genuflect (never done that before - was I supposed to make the sign of the cross as well?)), and then went and spoke to 3 people without waiting for them to approach me first:o I’m so silly that way usually!
They were very friendly, told me not to worry, and that it was a friendly little group and they were glad to see more people, especially younger ones (although I’m not that young, I’m 37). They said they hoped to see me next week. I then asked if I was allowed to use the Holy water to make the sign of the cross on the way out and they said of course I could, so I did that…was very happy to be able to do that since I can’t take Holy Communion…
I then managed to briefly speak to the priest before he rushed off to Mass at the other church, and he told me to phone him and we could arrange a one-to-one meeting…I’m so excited about that!
All in all, a great success…thanks to all on this forum for the encouragement (even other threads have helped me), I really appreciate it!
God Bless 🙂
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Wonderful.

Whenever we’re tempted to complicate things, it’s enormously helpful (and calming) to remember that God loves us like a Father, perfectly, most tenderly. Utter simplicity and docility. Ask Him often, beginning of each day is a perfect time, to “help me love you like a child.”

Begin again each day - totally anew - to love God as a child would love.

Small, simple, joyfully, even if it sometimes is harder and we don’t get any feeling out of it. Struggle like a child going up a little hill. Smile with Him; He’s right next to you.
 
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