L
LongingSoul
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ewtn.com.au/library/PAPALDOC/jp2tb30.htmSo, nocturnal emissions are okay, but withdrawal is bad. Intent to complete intercourse but having an “accident” is okay. It’s all kinda silly. All three are the exact same physical thing.
In this 1980 audience of Pope StJPII, he most clearly explains the original nuptial meaning of marital communion. He says by the first sin Adam and Eve somehow thwarted original innocence and the experiences of lust and shame came into the communion by way of desire.
Before that the communion of the man and woman was an expression of original innocence. Between the two of them in self giving love and living for the other, they experienced the wholeness of heaven. Before desire came into the act, it was a ritual act of communion. A lived experience of the presence of God.
So when concupiscence entered this realm, man and woman were required to make a conscious choice to honour the nuptial meaning of the union to prevent the distortions of sex into an ungodly act diminishing the whole relationship. That involves acknowledging the strong human penchant to serve the desire first at the expense of the spiritual meaning because whatever comes out of a distorted expression of the union, erodes the true godly relationship.
The lust of the flesh directs these desires, however, to satisfaction of the body, often at the cost of a real and full communion of persons. In this sense, attention should be paid to the way in which semantic accentuations are distributed in the verses of Genesis 3. Although there are few of them, they reveal interior consistency. The man seems to feel ashamed of his own body with particular intensity: “I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself” (Gn 3:10). These words emphasize the metaphysical character of shame. At the same time, for the man, shame united with lust will become an impulse to “dominate” the woman. (“he shall rule over you.”)
Subsequently, the experience of this domination is manifested more directly in the woman as the insatiable desire for a different union. From the moment when the man “dominates” her, the communion of persons—made of the full spiritual union of the two subjects giving themselves to each other—is followed by a different mutual relationship. This is the relationship of possession of the other as the object of one’s own desire. If this impulse prevails on the part of the man, the instincts that the woman directs to him, according to the expression of Genesis 3:16, can—and do—assume a similar character. Sometimes, perhaps, they precede the man’s “desire,” or even aim at arousing it and giving it impetus.
St JPII explains how because the meaning of conjugal relations is more spiritually significant than just sexual satisfaction and reproduction, the way we indulge it determines our attitude towards each other and the relationship.
When, in this vast context, we speak of lust as a limitation, infraction or even distortion of the nuptial meaning of the body, we are referring above all to the preceding analyses regarding the state of original innocence, that is, the theological prehistory of man. At the same time, we have in mind the measure that historical man, with his “heart,” applies to his own body in relation to male/female sexuality. This measure is not something exclusively conceptual. It determines the attitudes and decides in general the way of living the body.
So when people make the choice to thwart the donation of the whole self in the act and dedicate it solely to the purpose of mutual self satisfaction, they confirm a distorted attitude towards their relationship and celebrate original sin. The meaning is in the selflessness of each spouse whether they have a little or a lot to give. (Remember the Lords esteem of the old woman who had nothing to give to charity but gave everything she had. The spiritual virtue is in the generosity of the giver not in the quality of the gift.)