I think there are numerous reasons why people don’t stay married anymore. Part of it is due to changes in the U.S. culture. Part of it is due to lack of good, married role models. Part of it is that people have no idea what love really is.
One of the most cited reasons people don’t stay married is a disagreement on how responsibilities will be divided up during the marriage. Many woman bought into the idea of the woman having it all, career, husband and children. They see themselves as multi-tasking gurus or superwomen, until they have checked off the husband and children as things to achieve in life. They’re run ragged, stressed, and their children are babysat by computers, tv and games that give the children instant satisfaction. Woman frequently discover that their husband is “too tired” to help around the house, so not only do they end up doing the traditional chores, they also are trying to deal with stress from work. In recent years men have been able to duck out of responsibility. About 50% of the time, there is no man in the home to teach boys to be strong Christians, responsible citizens, defenders of women etc. They learn about relationships from television.
There is no man there to guide them into make good choices. There are mothers who feel guilty for not having a male role model for their son, so they end up spoiling and coddling their sons. These sons reach a certain age, get married and expect to be coddled and spoiled by their tired, stressed out, working wives. Most women are shocked when they have to force Prince Charming into changing a baby’s diaper.
The spoiled husband is shocked that he is expected to leave his game and change a diaper.
Then these husbands resent the time the woman spends coddling the baby, because it cuts down on the time the woman used to spend coddling them. The husband then decides that she doesn’t love him anymore, because the mother is busy trying to be both father and mother to the children he has come to resent. Then the mother looks around one day and thinks “Gee, I don’t have three children. I have four,” as she begins to realize that her husband never grew up and became a responsible adult.
The husband in turn, will often leave the wife, for another woman who is unencumbered and willing to coddle and spoil him. You can insert wife for husband on many occasions, because some women are just as selfish and clueless.
What we are seeing is the fruit of “The Me Generation.” Immature young adults who don’t have any idea that love isn’t like a drug that makes you feel good all the time. Love isn’t about making a checklist of what you are supposed to have in life and feeling ecstatic that you have it.
Once young people understand what love and responsibility is, which is what they yearn for, the divorce rate will go down. God is love. Once they can absorb that fact and understand the responsibilities that come with loving God, then we will see more happily married people.
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:clapping: