Why do people object to youth ministry?

[oldcatholicguy]

I’ve been getting really frustrated with the “more-Catholic-than-the-pope” types lately, but what really bothers me is when people have some kind of vendetta against the youth of the Church, no matter how faithful they are. I’m involved in youth ministry, and I dare say there’s a lot of potential (I’m 20, by the way). I’ll see people online (go figure) who demonize things like the YouCat or LifeTeen (which give good, solid catechesis). Even here of CAF a couple weeks ago, asking for prayers for a Teens Encounter Christ retreat Iwhich is based on Cursillo, and I believe is even mentioned in the Catechism somewhere). The first response had criticisms of it!

What’s the deal? What do these people have for their ideas if they’re so bright? Hit the kids over the head with a Catechism for 8 years? I had that kind, and after Confirmation, pretty much lived my whole high school career as a godless pagan.

I’m volunteering at a parish (second-closest to my home) where the confirmation program is has become a lot more interactive and “youth-groupy” if you will. Of course this isn’t a parish with the TLM, and they’ve had a “guitar” Mass before, but it’s far from a liberal modernist parish! When it comes to doctrine, this parish is VERY loyal! And we’ve gotten feedback that our confirmation program is an improvement from putting the confirmandi in a classroom! They want God and are more interested!

Note that I’m not saying to make the Church more “fun” (before the Pharisees accuse me of that). I’m saying that we need to plant the desire for God in their hearts! I was brought to my faith by FAITHFUL Catholics who loved me and showed me God’s love, not by being convinced in a debate! So why do people gripe about it? Is the method of bringing Christ to young people and vice-versa somehow not “traditional” enough?

Here’s the dirty little secret you will learn after you have some more years under your belt-

People will always find a reason to complain about something you do. Even if you are doing it right.

As to your specific question, they do it because-
-you’re not doing it like it was done in the “good old days”
-they feel guilty for not being as involved as you and instead of doing something they find it easier to look for faults in you
-they fear change and/or fear threatened by the youth
-they are jealous
-they doubt the eternal nature of the Church and think that they are the ones who have to save it
-you are actually doing it wrong (but, from my experience, the ones who point this out usually also tell you how to do it right; I don’t count this as critizism, but some do so I included it in my list)

 

[WingsOfEagles]

No. We shouldn’t encourage our children to think that love is really a feeling or anemotion. Love is not a feeling it’s an act of the will. This doesn’t mean that the life of love is dour, but love comes first…sometimes God gives a feeling and sometimes not. We shouldn’t love for the feeling we sometimes get.

“Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.” Mother Theresa

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” Mother Theresa

“Let us always greet each other with a smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.” Mother Theresa

“Lonliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.” Mother Theresa

 

[JackVk]

Here’s the dirty little secret you will learn after you have some more years under your belt-

People will always find a reason to complain about something you do. Even if you are doing it right.

As to your specific question, they do it because-
-you’re not doing it like it was done in the “good old days”
-they feel guilty for not being as involved as you and instead of doing something they find it easier to look for faults in you
-they fear change and/or fear threatened by the youth
-they are jealous
-they doubt the eternal nature of the Church and think that they are the ones who have to save it
-you are actually doing it wrong (but, from my experience, the ones who point this out usually also tell you how to do it right; I don’t count this as critizism, but some do so I included it in my list)

eh, I just think I needed something to complain about on the Internet this evening. I kid you not, my former confessor started laughing when I started to say “net surfing…you know the drill”. Ugh, I’m really getting tired of this personality trait.

 

[WingsOfEagles]

eh, I just think I needed something to complain about on the Internet this evening. I kid you not, my former confessor started laughing when I started to say “net surfing…you know the drill”. Ugh, I’m really getting tired of this personality trait.

There’s some truth in what you asked though. There is a large generation gap between the elderly and the teens in a Catholic parish. The Church was a very different place when they were kids and I think even changes that don’t go against doctrine are sometimes difficult for them to accept.

 

[IrishRush]

These are kids, remember, and we need to meet them where they are.

Bingo!! You hit it right on the head!
Yes, they need formation and they need to learn what their faith is all about, but we have to remember that they’re kids! And the way they learn is different from the way adults learn.
If you can get kids to get involved in a discussion, give their own opinions and ideas some air then you’re engaging them. As a CCD teacher of 7th graders, that’s my biggest challenge. How can I get them to engage enough that they actually retain and think about what they’ve learned?
I know I can’t shove faith down their throats - they need to see the real beauty of it to make them want it. There’s the challenge.

 

[Edward_H]

“Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.” Mother Theresa

“Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.” Mother Theresa

“Let us always greet each other with a smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.” Mother Theresa

“Lonliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.” Mother Theresa

Joy is not ours to give. It’s God’s and it only comes from a lively interior life. The single biggest improvement one could make to a “Youth Ministry” at a parish would be to encourage the leaders and catechists to renew their love of the Mass and to go toConfessionmore often, and to commit to a period of daily prayer.

You could throw away the dumb skits and the kids would get more out of God in their catechists than anything else.

 

[WingsOfEagles]

Joy is not ours to give. It’s God’s and it only comes from a lively interior life. The single biggest improvement one could make to a “Youth Ministry” at a parish would be to encourage the leaders and catechists to renew their love of the Mass and to go toConfessionmore often, and to commit to a period of daily prayer.

You could throw away the dumb skits and the kids would get more out of God in their catechists than anything else.

Who said the love that happens at these Youth Ministry functions aren’t a direct reflection of Christ being with all of us? It depends on who your youth minsters are. The ones I had more than loved the Mass and have a strong prayer life (which they shared with us). We opened every meeting with a reflective prayer. We read the day’s Gospel every week and really hashed out what it meant. We sometimes prayed a rosary. We closed with a reflective prayer. It didn’t mean we never did fun activities though. Also, you may think the skits are dumb, but they are often used to teach the youth about key doctrine.

 

[JackVk]

Joy is not ours to give. It’s God’s and it only comes from a lively interior life. The single biggest improvement one could make to a “Youth Ministry” at a parish would be to encourage the leaders and catechists to renew their love of the Mass and to go toConfessionmore often, and to commit to a period of daily prayer.

You could throw away the dumb skits and the kids would get more out of God in their catechists than anything else.

While it’s true that joy comes from a strong interior life, let me quote St. Josemaria Escriva in The Way: “long faces, coarse manners, a ridiculous appearance, a repelling air. Is that how you hope to inspire others to follow Christ?”

As those who grew up in the 60’s will say, it won’t really cause them to be attracted to the interior life if they’re getting a ruler across the knuckles unless they sit down and shut up. Remember my personal testimony: I decided to live for God because someone showed me love, not because they refuted every single objection to Catholicism. Like I said, it’s a matter of meeting them where they are.

 

[Edward_H]

Who said the love that happens at these Youth Ministry functions aren’t a direct reflection of Christ being with all of us? It depends on who your youth minsters are. The ones I had more than loved the Mass and have a strong prayer life (which they shared with us). We opened every meeting with a reflective prayer. We read the day’s Gospel every week and really hashed out what it meant. We sometimes prayed a rosary. We closed with a reflective prayer. It didn’t mean we never did fun activities though. Also, you may think the skits are dumb, but they are often used to teach the youth about key doctrine.

Ask the kids (4 rows back) about the point of the skit.

Go into any skit and what you see are a bunch of drama doer types doing the work. And 1 Or 2 rows of drama wannabes…and then after that rows of texters and sleepers and eye rollers. But the adults are so into the skits and the make fun they don’t see the full reality.

 

[Edward_H]

While it’s true that joy comes from a strong interior life, let me quote St. Josemaria Escriva in The Way: “long faces, coarse manners, a ridiculous appearance, a repelling air. Is that how you hope to inspire others to follow Christ?”

As those who grew up in the 60’s will say, it won’t really cause them to be attracted to the interior life if they’re getting a ruler across the knuckles unless they sit down and shut up. Remember my personal testimony: I decided to live for God because someone showed me love, not because they refuted every single objection to Catholicism. Like I said, it’s a matter of meeting them where they are.

That’s exactly what I mean a sincere joy that comes from a lively interior life. It’s the OVERFLOW of interior life that spills on to others. This is far different than parents trying to puff up the students for 30 minutes.

 

[JackVk]

Ask the kids (4 rows back) about the point of the skit.

Go into any skit and what you see are a bunch of drama doer types doing the work. And 1 Or 2 rows of drama wannabes…and then after that rows of texters and sleepers and eye rollers. But the adults are so into the skits and the make fun they don’t see the full reality.

Do what we do: after the skit, break them up into small groups and get them talking. Either way, no ministry or formation will be absolutely perfect. Since we are all unique in God’s eyes, we cannot expect cookie-cutter interior lives.

 

[benjammin]

My understanding of Evangelization is really friendship. You can’t evangelize someone you don’t know. So evangelization is personal, building off friendship. Parents should provide more formation rather than having it relegated to CCD/Youth Ministry, dropping their kids off at the curb. Much more is needed by parents.

I totally agree, but also, can’t these kids make friends at youth group. What if a person lives in a city with not very many catholics and doesn’t necessarily know who’s all involved and who’s not? In that sense a youth group can connect a lot of people. Also, what if the parents don’t feel they are the best teachers?

I understand there are probably a lot of flakey, boring or even downright heretical youth group movements (unfortunately a lot of lifeteen groups fall into this, though some are very good). So whats wrong with getting kids to get together in these groups. Maybe they can find something in common with their faith.

Also, i remember you said something about how most kids would rather text under their desks or pass notes. As a teacher, it is then our job to engage them more. Now I agree that you shouldn’t do something heretical, but you do need to do something engaging. You are probably the type of person who is very interested about catholicism and does a lot of self study. Unfortunately most people aren’t that way even if they go to mass every sunday. Does that make them bad catholics? No. Instead these are people who need to get excited by the faith. You give them information that is sound within the catholic church while entertaining them and getting them excited. It doesn’t have to be all guitars and **** either. Maybe some kids are interested in different apologetic topics. Some may be more interested in social justice or any number of topics. I remember as a social studies teacher that you can’t just rely off the textbook or the kids will be bored. Now i’m not saying the catechism is boring, but for teens it can be a bit much, but you can teach it to them by finding ways to make it apply to their lives or think of examples of how it relates. Same with scripture. Any good teacher will find a way to get kids the info without dumbing it down, but still making it interesting and exciting.

Sorry for the rant, but I just got going. I do agree though that friendship is important. But, youthgroups when properly run can be great sources of friendship

 

[WingsOfEagles]

Ask the kids (4 rows back) about the point of the skit.

Go into any skit and what you see are a bunch of drama doer types doing the work. And 1 Or 2 rows of drama wannabes…and then after that rows of texters and sleepers and eye rollers. But the adults are so into the skits and the make fun they don’t see the full reality.

You do understand that your texters generally aren’t that into the Rosary, Divine Mercy Chaplet, Meditation to Christian Music, Gospel reading and interpretation, etc.

I think the problem is that because you don’t see the point in the skits, so you don’t think they should happen (or perhaps you saw a poorly done one). Perhaps those 2 rows of “wannabe drama types” need the material presented in skit form. A skit takes what, 5 minutes. Then you move on to a different method of learning.

 

[Edward_H]

Do what we do: after the skit, break them up into small groups and get them talking. Either way, no ministry or formation will be absolutely perfect. Since we are all unique in God’s eyes, we cannot expect cookie-cutter interior lives.

The worst thing you can do is to follow emptiness with jabberwocky.

 

[Edward_H]

You do understand that your texters generally aren’t that into the Rosary, Divine Mercy Chaplet, Meditation to Christian Music, Gospel reading and interpretation, etc.

I think the problem is that because you don’t see the point in the skits, so you don’t think they should happen (or perhaps you saw a poorly done one). Perhaps those 2 rows of “wannabe drama types” need the material presented in skit form. A skit takes what, 5 minutes. Then you move on to a different method of learning.

First, you separate the genders. Too much distraction to allow real work onthe soul to happen.

Then you get some topics that have an edge to them. Moral decision making, showing heroic virtue in their daily life, helping fiends with troubles, learning to love struggle, theology of the body. You get people who know how to talk plainly.

 

[WingsOfEagles]

The worst thing you can do is to follow emptiness with jabberwocky.

It’s not jabberwocky if the skit had everything to do with part of our faith and then you dive into discussing that faith in small groups. It’s a learning style. It would seem that it’s not yours.

 

[jeannetherese]

It is wonderful that you are committed to teaching the faith in accordance with the Magisterium. Unfortunately, not all youth ministers share equally in knowledge of the faith, and a few may even desire to their own concerns as if they were part and parcel of the Magisterium.
Very well intentioned adults, may teach in error, or attempt to lead the church to where they think it should be. This can create a confusion for the youth and may undermine their faith.
For those of us who have had such youth ministry experiences, there are valid reasons to be very concerned about youth formation and the quality of catechesis in some parishes.
I would not want to criticize all parishes or all catechists and I am sure that forum members can agree that there may be some variation in the quality of catechesis from parish to parish. Not all will be as stellar as yourself and that is most unfortunate.
May God bless you and all catechists. Amen.

 

[Edward_H]

It’s not jabberwocky if the skit had everything to do with part of our faith and then you dive into discussing that faith in small groups. It’s a learning style. It would seem that it’s not yours.

Sorry…I’ve seen too many YEARS of skits. Maybe 1 in a hundred had effect. It’s such a pat, lazy thing to do.

 

[JackVk]

The worst thing you can do is to follow emptiness with jabberwocky.

You’re being really unfair and making gross overgeneralizations here. Just because it’s a skit done by people who are not Oscar winners doesn’t mean it’s going to be lame, cheesy, and not teach them anything. Maybe you’ve had bad experiences, but that doesn’t mean the Holy Spirit can’t work where He wills.

 

[WingsOfEagles]

First, you separate the genders. Too much distraction to allow real work onthe soul to happen.

Then you get some topics that have an edge to them. Moral decision making, showing heroic virtue in their daily life, helping fiends with troubles, learning to love struggle, theology of the body. You get people who know how to talk plainly.

Gender separation isn’t unheard of for some of the discussions/workshops at retreats I’ve been to. It doesn’t mean that’s the only way material is presented. Afterall, how else are Catholic men and women to meat each other and get married?