Why do some have to suffer more for Christ while others do not?

[CRATUS]

I know it is totally lame. But it has been almost a decade since high school. I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

 

[CRATUS]

If you do not forgive, you will keep the anger. They will move on and forget. Besides you cannot please everyone.

 

[oldgraymare2]

Hi CRATUS,

Personally, I don’t think that you should be hanging around with people who make fun of you, and who put you down.

We should be around people who we care about, and who care about us, too, and who have our best interests at heart. Someone like that isn’t going to make fun of you. True friends want to “lift each other up,” and not “tear each other down.”

I do understand that it is painful to think about these unkind things that were said to you. I would pray about them, and ask the Lord to help you heal from them, and from the past that was so painful for you.

God bless you!

 

[Dorothy]

I know it is totally lame. But it has been almost a decade since high school. I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

When others say and do things that hurt us we can identify with our Lord Jesus Christ, and better understand what He went through.

I’m not saying that you should hang around with them and allow them to tear you down; I totally agree with
“oldgraymare” that you should seek friends that are reflecting the love of the Lord in their lives. Community in Christ is upbuilding!

And, Jesus is the Healer of all our hurts, as what he went through extraordinary pain of mind, body, and spirit for us!

Allow Jesus to enter into the hurts of your past, as He was there and wants to heal you!

May our Lord Jesus Christ bless you and be with you on your journey to Him!

Our Lady, Seat of Wisdom, pray for us!

---

Many times I have to remind myself what the saints teach us: If we knew the value of suffering in union with Christ we can learn to endure it joyfully.

 

[theoda]

I know it is totally lame. But it has been almost a decade since high school. I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

catholic-pages.com/life/suffering.asp

Our Lord Jesus told St. Faustina: "If the Angels were capable of envy, the would envy us for two things: one is the receiving of Holy Communion and the other is suffering."

Here are some other quotes by saints: catholic-church.org/grace/ecu/suffering.htm

 

[CRATUS]

catholic-pages.com/life/suffering.asp

Our Lord Jesus told St. Faustina: "If the Angels were capable of envy, the would envy us for two things: one is the receiving of Holy Communion and the other is suffering."

Here are some other quotes by saints: catholic-church.org/grace/ecu/suffering.htm

Why is suffering good?

 

[Dorothy]

Why is suffering good?

Suffering (that we cannot eradicate) can conform us to Christ and help us to be aware of what He went through out of love for us.

By suffering we can expiate for our sins, and for the sins of others. With the grace of Our Lord Jesus Christ we can do this.

 

[Ignatius]

I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

No, but the sooner you let it go, the sooner you’ll feel better. Hanging on to negative feelings is like poison that slowly kills you. Focus on others then you’ll begin see the blessing of living for Christ.

 

[JRKH]

I know it is totally lame. But it has been almost a decade since high school. I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

Will you always remember these things…Probably yes. Memories are like that - good or bad.
The old saying “forgive and forget” generally just doesn’t work…Forgiving is much more doable than forgetting……especially forgetting things that “cut”

Will you always be a target? On the whole this will lessen as you get older. There will always be the immature clown or two…but overall my experience has been that as people mature they tend to drop such behavior for the most part.
A friend might make a comment or two but certainly not intending to pick on or insult.

Peace
James

 

[theoda]

Why is suffering good?

The link I posted can explain it better than I can

 

[Della]

To address your title question, we only see the suface of anyone’s life. We cannot know how much suffering others have. This is why Jesus commanded us to “take your cross and follow” him. Each of us has his own cross to bear. For some it is being physically different. I can identify with this because I am a very small person–so small I could be a member of the Little People of America. Petite doesn’t really cover it. I have been teased all my life, and even now, when I’m in my 60’s some people can’t resist commenting on my lack of height–as if it’s news to me.

Still, I can only imagine how hard life can be for those even smaller than I. Remembering that there are others who are suffering deprivations, painful condiitions, dying, unloved, abused, and the list goes on, prompts me to be thankful for all I have–all that God has given me.

Don’t let others comments rule you life. Dimiss them for what they are: stupid, uncouth, thoughtless, and totally nothing to do with who you are before God and those who really matters in your life. Those who tease you will have to answer for their rude comments one day, so pray for them. We all do/say stupid things, so we ought to think of who we’ve offended or been unkind to, as well and do penance for it.

Give all your hurts to God, in Christ, who suffered far worse that name calling, although he suffered that too, for all for us, not for himself. Don’t nurse your hurts and dwell on them but give your hurt feelings to God who can make great good come out of our sufferings, turning them into blessings for us and for others.

 

[mikekle]

With my job, I get to see alot of different people daily, it has made me wonder why God made certain people they way he did…I mean, I see some people that have what is considered to be ‘ugly’ features, and then those who look like they could be run way models, I realize it all has to do with their parents, grandparents, traits passed down, but it does seem strange God would seem to curse some and bless others when it comes to looks.

It has really made me begin to wonder if God is even involved in how a person turns out, with some of the deformities people are born with, sometimes it seems our reproduction is more akin to ‘mass production’ versus God breathing life into each and every one of us.

 

[Della]

With my job, I get to see alot of different people daily, it has made me wonder why God made certain people they way he did…I mean, I see some people that have what is considered to be ‘ugly’ features, and then those who look like they could be run way models, I realize it all has to do with their parents, grandparents, traits passed down, but it does seem strange God would seem to curse some and bless others when it comes to looks.

It has really made me begin to wonder if God is even involved in how a person turns out, with some of the deformities people are born with, sometimes it seems our reproduction is more akin to ‘mass production’ versus God breathing life into each and every one of us.

But God knows that every person has intrinsic worth and was created in his image. Judging others’ worthiness based merely on looks or ability is what has led to contraception, abortion, and euthanasia. People aren’t worth something because of their looks or abilities but because God created us worthy of his love. No matter what “burdens” life has placed on us, Jesus’ shoulders are broad enough to carry them, and us too.

 

[CRATUS]

But God knows that every person has intrinsic worth and was created in his image. Judging others’ worthiness based merely on looks or ability is what has led to contraception, abortion, and euthanasia. People aren’t worth something because of their looks or abilities but because God created us worthy of his love. No matter what “burdens” life has placed on us, Jesus’ shoulders are broad enough to carry them, and us too.

Easy to say, than do. Looks are a big deal for women. I hate it when people deny it. People are especially cruel if you are not a “pretty” young girl. You can say suffering is good, but it depends on how much. I think for the most part the remarks do not bother me. I do not talk to those people, yet every now then when I look in the mirror, take an ugly picture, or some man rejects it reminds that maybe they are right. Some people can make fun of their flaws and live with them. Not me, being told you have an ugly face is just not fun or funny. Teenagers are cruel.

 

[CRATUS]

To address your title question, we only see the suface of anyone’s life. We cannot know how much suffering others have. This is why Jesus commanded us to “take your cross and follow” him. Each of us has his own cross to bear. For some it is being physically different. I can identify with this because I am a very small person–so small I could be a member of the Little People of America. Petite doesn’t really cover it. I have been teased all my life, and even now, when I’m in my 60’s some people can’t resist commenting on my lack of height–as if it’s news to me.

Still, I can only imagine how hard life can be for those even smaller than I. Remembering that there are others who are suffering deprivations, painful condiitions, dying, unloved, abused, and the list goes on, prompts me to be thankful for all I have–all that God has given me.

Don’t let others comments rule you life. Dimiss them for what they are: stupid, uncouth, thoughtless, and totally nothing to do with who you are before God and those who really matters in your life. Those who tease you will have to answer for their rude comments one day, so pray for them. We all do/say stupid things, so we ought to think of who we’ve offended or been unkind to, as well and do penance for it.

Give all your hurts to God, in Christ, who suffered far worse that name calling, although he suffered that too, for all for us, not for himself. Don’t nurse your hurts and dwell on them but give your hurt feelings to God who can make great good come out of our sufferings, turning them into blessings for us and for others.

For the most part, I agree. I have said and done cruel things as a teenager too. Every now and then, I guess when I feel especially insecure about something I remember those comments. I cannot change my face or please. I cannot go back to high school with the confidence I have now. I cannot change my features either.

 

[Della]

Easy to say, than do. Looks are a big deal for women. I hate it when people deny it. People are especially cruel if you are not a “pretty” young girl. You can say suffering is good, but it depends on how much. I think for the most part the remarks do not bother me. I do not talk to those people, yet every now then when I look in the mirror, take an ugly picture, or some man rejects it reminds that maybe they are right. Some people can make fun of their flaws and live with them. Not me, being told you have an ugly face is just not fun or funny. Teenagers are cruel.

I know how you feel, really I do. I’m something of an ugly duckling as well. My sister is the beauty of the family and yet she’s had two failed marriages and a son that turned on her to marry a gal with ego issues you wouldn’t believe. From her looks no one would think she has a care in the world, but it’s not true.

No one likes their looks, not even girls who are considered pretty. The beauty magazines make it look like their models are perfect, but they aren’t. Those pictures are altered and air-brushed. It’s a fantasy meant to sell beauty products. So, don’t measure yourself by such things. You are beautiful in God’s eyes, and some day you’ll be beautiful in the eyes of the right guy. Most women are beautiful if they smile, are gracious and kind. That’s true beauty. Cultivate those things and you will like what you see in the mirror.

 

[CRATUS]

Is someone making fun of your facial features mean you are “suffering for Christ”?
It sounds more like some insensitive people being rude.

And…is this suffering you describe considered more than other people’s suffering, as per your subject line?
I don’t mean to make light of your pain–we’ve all been insulted for various things and it surely hurts. And sensitive people are less likely to forget every jab.

But perhaps it would be helpful to you to put the teasing (and it may have been teasing instead of insults, which has a different motive all together) in perspective and realize that, as per your topic line, there are most like many who suffer much, much more than this (tho I don’t know your whole story, i’m only guessing from this post).

People who are severely sick or paralyzed or homeless or have had members of their family murdered or have lost children. And in many cases, some of these people who have had harder things happen to them learn to take life as it is and roll with the punches.
So maybe instead of thinking you are *suffering more *than others (if that’s what you are thinking), you can take an entirely new perspective on this.

Also…I bet some of those kids who teased/insulted you feel badly about it now.

You can change some features if they truly bother you. I know many people who have shortened or thinned or streamlined their nose and they are very, very happy with the results.
Huge lips are “in style”, btw. Women pay tons of money to get them like that.

.

You are right. I have not suffered more than others do. That is horrible assumption. I have money, a family, etc. Why aren’t I happy though?

 

[CRATUS]

I know how you feel, really I do. I’m something of an ugly duckling as well. My sister is the beauty of the family and yet she’s had two failed marriages and a son that turned on her to marry a gal with ego issues you wouldn’t believe. From her looks no one would think she has a care in the world, but it’s not true.

No one likes their looks, not even girls who are considered pretty. The beauty magazines make it look like their models are perfect, but they aren’t. Those pictures are altered and air-brushed. It’s a fantasy meant to sell beauty products. So, don’t measure yourself by such things. You are beautiful in God’s eyes, and some day you’ll be beautiful in the eyes of the right guy. Most women are beautiful if they smile, are gracious and kind. That’s true beauty. Cultivate those things and you will like what you see in the mirror.

You are right.

 

[Catholic1954]

I know it is totally lame. But it has been almost a decade since high school. I still remember everything people have insulted me over. My big nose, tiny eyes, huge lips. Some people thought it was noble I never really gave up on a lot of my “friends” who made fun of me. Even in college, I still found myself in similar situations where people would make fun of me. It gets old. Will I always been that easy target for criticism? They say forgive your enemies. I have not forgotten most of the things I have been told. Words are just words, but they stay with you.

Have you considered professional counseling to help you deal with the hurts of the past? Counseling can help you with your self esteem and give you the tools you need to leave the past back there and focus more on your life and opportunities in the present. Suffering for Christ does not mean you are called to be a target for verbal insults or somebody’s doormat.

 

[Della]

Have you considered professional counseling to help you deal with the hurts of the past? Counseling can help you with your self esteem and give you the tools you need to leave the past back there and focus more on your life and opportunities in the present. Suffering for Christ does not mean you are called to be a target for verbal insults or somebody’s doormat.

:yup: There’s no need to let yourself suffer when you can get help, Cratus.